Note: Thank you all for reviewing! I truly appreciate it, it keeps me motivated to continue this story. Once again inspiration for all of my chapters come from music, specifically the playlist that I created for "Ghost of You."
"Hey Bob?"
"Yes Non 'Ya?"
"Remember that deal I posted?"
"Nope."
"Well…I still am looking for four more songs to add."
"Try Smooth Criminal by Michael Jackson or Smack That by Akon."
"OKAY! :D"
Alright, so basically that was something random that came off the top of my head. It was my way of….Reminding some people about my little project. I am looking for four new songs to add to my GY play list and I just need some suggestions because once again I emphasize that music is a large part of this story in particular. We don't want to end up with some corny song now do we? Although, I will give MJ his props on "Thriller" and "Beat it" as well as other songs that are not coming to my mind.
But, yeah…We don't want Edward shoutin' smack that randomly. Hopefully this is my last super long ramble. Sorry guys, you can just skip 'em.
Edward Cullen
My eyes were intent on Juliet, fixated on her startled form. Had I made a mistake by telling her? I had coaxed myself into believing that it was best to glance through my explanation. I made it simple, telling her exactly what needed to be said for the moment. Enough that maybe I would not lose her in the process. I respected our friendship, I loved it enough that I attempted to keep it at a mere friendship, knowing that I, the selfish monster, wanted more. In reality, I was facing the inevitable in trying to be a friend to Juliet.
I loved this woman. I could deny it, but what good would that be? I had been in denial for the past few weeks, trying to convince myself that I could go on with my life if she eventually found herself.
It was not true, the scars of her presence were deeply imbedded in my skin. She was the only anesthetic that cured the loneliness that plagued me. I had thought I was a full man before she came, but I had never been so wrong in my entire existence.
She was strange, headstrong, intuitive, charming, and true. I could have made a list that went on for ages on how many things I cherished about her. I could very well do that, and when I did would she believe me? Would she understand my complete obsession with her? More than obsession, would she see how much I loved her?
My eyes never left her face as she raised it in a painfully shy way. "I think I love you, Juliet." I confessed, almost murmuring the words. It snagged her attention, of course.
"Edward…" I waited for her to continue, my heart ready to tear itself apart. I was usually a logical monster, but she evoked emotions that I had never felt in over a century. Not even when I was human would I have found someone who could do this sort of damage to my rational side.
"I-I can't. We can't." Juliet said and I couldn't believe her words. I gazed back at her meeting saddened brown eyes.
"If this is about what I am, Juliet I understand. I will always be here for you-" I stopped short, seeing her head shaking violently in disagreement. My heart was heaving as I ran through the possibilities.
"Edward, we can't. I'm not human."
"Neither am I." I argued, becoming more irritated, but managing to keep a composed tone. Barely, of course.
"That's not the point! Edward, I might not even exist. I can't live like that, I can't live without being able to feel. To actually be there. It isn't right."
"What isn't right about it? I love you, and I thought we established that I don't care if you are a ghost of a ghoul or whatever you think you are. You are my heart, and I want to be with you. Listen to me." I warned her.
"No, no…." She disputed tearlessly, sliding herself through the couch to back into the piano where her pale hand ghosted past the ivory keys. The horrified expression on her soft face made me repulsed by what I was doing, but I needed to know. Why was she insisting on being so distant?
"Juliet," I strode to her, three feet from where she stood. "I only have one question, if you really feel this way then I won't bother you."
"Edward-"
"Let me finish." I snapped, I was not going to regret that now of all times. "Do you love me or not?" I waited for her reply, staring at her with intense and eager eyes. I needed to know –desperately even. It was pathetic for me to have surrendered my heart like this, but I had everything to lose. Right now she was everything. I wanted to know if those feelings were mutual, if she could love a real monster like me.
I was sick and tired of feeling numb. The night I had almost lost her had made it clear to me. Juliet was the woman I wanted for eternity, with or without a body. I loved her against all that I knew was ethical and good. I was being selfish in attempting to pursue her.
Her warm brown eyes softened and engraved themselves into my mind, giving me the notion that she would have been crying. "I feel the same way, Edward. But how? How can you love me?" She queried, gazing back with baffled and crestfallen chocolate eyes.
"Because, I do." I told her simply, raising my hand to barely touch the air near her hand. I was so close to touching her, but I couldn't. It was impossible with her other half someplace else.
"Edward, I'm not even here. I'm not a whole person! You could do better than me, I may not even exist." That sent a shock of anger through my system. Saying she didn't exist was the most absurd prospect. If anything she was the most real thing to me in this entire world. There was not anything for me to live for, not until now. I would be damned if I was going to let her go now.
"Don't you dare say that. You are one of the most real things in my life. Lack of a physical body doesn't make you anything less than you. I wouldn't wantyour body without you in it!" Her eyes changed, softened a bit at that and she shakily raised her arms to twine them around me. I couldn't feel anything, I doubted she could either. But there was an air, I knew I wasn't alone and it made it easier to bare. I despised in witnessing her being upset with what she was. It drove me half mad to think she was anything less than what she was if she had a body.
"THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPELS YOU!" A low voice bellowed, a splash of water awakening my senses and allowing fury to course through my lifeless veins. With narrowed eyes and clenched fists, I revolved to see the culprit. As expected from his thoughts, there he was. Emmett in full priest attire with a bowl of holy water set on the counter and a plastic cup in his hand. I was going to murder Emmett, I swear it!
Well, if this doesn't work at least I'll get a kick out of it. Emmett thought, knowing full well I heard him. "Emmett…" I growled, my droplets of water falling down my face as I stalked towards him with what could have only been bloody murder in my eyes.
Isabella Swan POV
Well, it was nice while it lasted. A trip to cloud nine wasn't exactly everlasting, but then again…It shouldn't have been cut short by a burly Emmett dressed in a black priests robe with a wooden cross in one hand and a hot pink plastic Barbie cup in the other.
To say that Edward was "furious" would have been a massive understatement. Because when he left me to go attack Emmett, there was pure homicidal fury imbedded in his jeweled eyes.
"OUT!" Edward's velvet voice was deadly, murderous.
"After I get rid of it! Come on Edward!" Emmett was fighting an impish smile as he scooped up more holy water and tossed it at Edward.
"Whoops, missed." He said, backing away from Edward who placed his hands on either side of the bowl and dumped it on Emmett's head. Curly obsidian locks were plastered to his head and a squirt of water began to shoot out of his corpse white lips.
A ferocious Edward extended his index finger towards the door as Emmett took the bowl-hat off of his head. "Get.Out."
"Fine, fine. It looks like you want this ghost here. Does Eddie have a girlfriend?" He raised his hands up in the air as apology and surrender as he inched towards the door at a painfully slow-slow for vampires- speed. "Female ghost from beyond the portal, I beg for your forgiveness. I meant you no harm, just make sure you keep my Brother from being a prude." I was literally on the brink of giggling, heck, I was laughing. To say that Emmett wasn't funny was one of the falsest things on this Earth. To me, he was like the older brother I wish I had.
Then again, I was also embarrassed. And Edward was still fuming.
"EMMETT!"
"Goodbye dear ghost! Till we meet again!" He swung out the door dramatically, with the back of his hand pressed to his forehead leaving Edward and me alone again.
--
I rolled over on the couch in Edward's room to see him giving me a crooked smile in the corner. "Happy fourth of July," he greeted. And I simply rolled my eyes closing them again. I couldn't sleep, but when I closed my eyes I felt oddly dream-like. As if something very far away was reacting to my momentary peace of mind.
"Well, you can't stay there forever." The beautiful angel prompted me, and I sighed heavily before sliding into a sitting position, criss cross apple sauce was kind of hard to manage when my foot would slip into my thigh. But, I was adapting to my situation. I would have to if I was going to stay like this.
"Alright then, what would you suggest we do Mr. Cullen?" I queried, my face taking on a genuinely quizzical expression as I watched the lopsided smile become more defined.
"It's a surprise."
"Haven't I had enough surprises for a lifetime?"
"Not quite yet. Now let's go, I'm just about ready to leave and you should be too." Edward's eyes skidded to the door where a short, black haired pixie stood with a vacant expression on her face.
"That's a good idea, Edward. We haven't gone there for at least a decade or more." Her high pitched voice was enthusiastic, while her expression soon became radiant making all of her skin glow with her exotic, elfin beauty.
"I should have expected you would want to come." Edward said with an impish grin that made me feel as if I were missing out on an inside joke. I was a bit perturbed when I lightly tapped my fingers against my arm to prove a point. Then of course one of my fingers stopped my staccato speed when it went through my forearm.
"I'll go get Jasper, I've already told Esme and she is gathering everyone else."
"I see. Will you be riding with Carlisle?"
"Well, I am guessing that you want to take your Volvo and I know all of us won't be able to fit inside his Mercedes." Alice's words made it clear to the both of us –more so Edward because of his mind reading- that most likely her and Jasper would be in the Volvo with us.
"Well, Rosalie has her M3-" Edward began to soon be cut off by the pixie once again.
"She's in the middle of toying with it."
"I see. So, you and Jasper in my car."
"Yes."
"I drive." He added, bargaining with Alice who simply shrugged and danced off.
--
Lights go
out and I can't be saved
Tides that I tried to swim against
Have
brought me down upon my knees
Oh I beg, I beg and plead
Singing
I couldn't complain with Edward's current choice of music, it was really soothing. My mind recognized the song as "Clocks." Well, great, now what's my real name? Coming up blank.
Alice was blabbing incessantly in the backseat about taking Jasper and Edward shopping for new clothes, Jasper did not seem to enthralled but then again he was not exactly objecting. "We'll go ahead and get you this nice shirt I found…" She started off again and I couldn't help but feel happy I was not one of Alice's victims. One reason being because she didn't even know I existed.
Come
out of things unsaid Singing Confusion that never stops
Shoot an apple off my head
And a trouble
that can't be named
A tiger's waiting to be tamed
You are
You are
The
closing walls and ticking clocks
Gonna come back and take you
home
I could not stop, that you now know
Singing come out
upon my seas
Curse missed opportunities
Am I a part of the
cure
Or am I part of the disease
Esme, Carlisle, Rosalie, and Yogi-Emmett…Were nowhere to be seen. My wide eyes combed the area in the sea of people for flawless faces, but found none, to my disappointment.
"Don't worry about them." Edward whispered in my ear and I sighed exhaling my frustration. We were on a peer, grains of sand beneath our feet and a dark sparkling stretch of water ahead of us. As well as couples and families spread out on blankets waiting for the main event of the night.
"We tend not to watch these…Believe it or not we have seen our fill of fireworks." Of course, about one hundred seven years of fire works. I could understand how they would become less exciting after a while. As well as other holidays. At least we could agree on that.
"I can understand that…Fireworks are always the same. They explode into the sky with a loud noise and then all there is in the end is a big cloud of smoke and color." I shrugged, being able to call back some memories from my past. Although in none of them did I ever hear my name. It was as if my mind was playing tricks on me, teasing me with vivid depictions and then leaving me with only a bitter sweet taste of my earlier life.
"I agree, to a certain point with you. But, now this just takes away majority of the fun. I was hoping to see you jump up and down in anticipation." Edward confessed, grinning back at me with a sinfully breathtaking smile before it fell. I wanted it back.
"Well, I think you are wrong on that. But, I am still excited." I mended quickly and it returned to both my joy and humiliation.
Unexpectedly, a shrill crack was heard as the dark blanket of night felll upon us. A splash of vivid color and sparks shot out of the sky painting a picture that stunned my mind. I felt like a blind woman seeing something for the first time. As the sparks fell into the glistening ocean, another round of fireworks were shot into the sky. Four at a time, which made the impact that much more beautiful.
Red and white sparks floated and zigzagged across the sky until two chandelier like explosions clouded my vision. Pure white streams of powdery-like fireworks ghosted past the others and drifted out of sight to make way for brilliant blue and lavender sparks that shot out from others. The only other noise apart from the crackling and whistles were the "oo's" and "ahhs" coming from the people.
"It's beautiful…" I commented absentmindedly in a dazed tone of voice.
"Yes, I agree." My eyes strayed to see Edward looking not at the light filled sky, but me. I swiftly turned my head back to the spectacle above and tried not to focus to much on the strikingly perfect man beside me. A blast of neon green that looked as if it were going to hit us which made me involuntarily shrink back. Edward merely laughed an enchanting musical laugh.
"I will protect you." He stated moving towards me with humor and something else deep within his dazzling gold eyes. I allowed him to come closer, but if I had a heart it would be jumping out of my chest.
Isabella.
Isabella.
Bella.
Bella!
My entire body froze at the voice in my head as I inhaled abruptly with wide eyes.
"Juliet? I'm sorry, Juliet? Speak to me." Edward's low, frantic voice called to me. People among us were too focused in on their own children, lovers, familes to notice the boy's fretting. I couldn't get myself to respond. The entire vessel that kept me within was unresponsive. I was unresponsive. ME! THAT'S ME!! I'M BELLA! ISABELLA SWAN!!
I DO EXIST!
Singing
you are, you are
You are, you are
You are, you are
You
are, you are
You are, you are Home, home where I
wanted to go Home, (you)
home where I wanted to (are) go
And
nothing else compares
Oh nothing else compares
And nothing
else compares
Home, home where I wanted to go
Home, (you) home where I wanted
to (are) go
--
Once again…A cliff hanger. Mainly because this was the longest chapter in the history of chapters for me. Now, you all must review and beat 15 reviews x)! Because I said soooo.
