A/N: Hey everyone… hope you like this chapter… enjoy…. And don't forget to comment… THANKS
Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyers owns all Twilight characters… and we love her for it.
Chapter Song: Upside Down – Jack Johnson
Upside Down
I want to turn the whole thing upside down
I'll find the things they say just can't be found
I'll share this love I find with everyone
We'll sing and dance to Mother Nature's songs
I don't want this feeling to go away
EPOV:
To say that I was anxious for Monday to come is an understatement.
Saturday had been a weird day altogether.
First I bump into Bella at the mall and then she stops, talks to me and actually smiles at me… yeah… talk about smiling. That girl has a beautiful smile.
Although I was mad as hell that her pathetic excuse of a boyfriend was there, it was good to see Bella. She looked so different from what she normally looks like at school.
I've noticed that Bella usually wears t-shirts and plain jeans to school. Well, at the movies she was wearing a pair of skinny jeans a shirt that complimented her body. She looked so different… dare I say she looked amazing?
Yeah she did.
I was so anxious that when Monday morning finally got there I got to the college a whole hour before we were even supposed to meet each other.
I told myself that I was going to get there early so that I could read ahead and be prepared by the time Bella got here. The only down side to that was the fact that I couldn't focus on anything at all. No matter how many times I read the first paragraph of Hills like White Elephants by Ernest Hemingway, I couldn't focus.
I was thinking about Saturday and how Bella seemed so uncomfortable around her boyfriend.
I know for sure that he's an asshole by the mere fact that he's checking out other girls when she's standing right next to him. Talk about being disrespectful.
Also, I hated the way he pulled her back down to her seat at the movies. No girl deserves to be treated that way, especially Bella.
It wasn't until 20 minutes after I got to the library that I received a message from Alice saying that Bella said to get one of the offices from the library. I told Alice to tell her that I would, though I had no idea what she was talking about. I went and asked the librarians as to where the offices were located. She kindly pointed me toward the back of the library, behind all the reference bookshelves.
I looked for an office that was empty and found one. I went in and closed the door. I put my bag pack on the table and I took out my laptop. I started reading again or pretending to read is more like it.
I was nervous and reading was not helping it. I had my headphones on and was listening to some Breaking Benjamin to try to calm myself down. Well at least I knew she was coming for sure…. She was on her way already.
I decided to try to read again and though I wasn't succeeding I forced myself to look down at the lines in the book and to attempt to decipher the words in the page.
I was trying to focus so hard that I didn't hear anyone coming into the office. It wasn't until someone placed their belongings down on the table that I noticed that Bella was there… and she scared the crap out of me!!!
"Oh! Hey how are you?" I asked her feeling like a dumbass for not hearing Bella come in. I removed my headphones admitting that these headphones were the problem. I turned my iPod off and placed it on the table to the side. I looked up at Bella and she seemed to be avoiding my gaze. I guess she was back to that.
"I'm good, thanks" she said while she sat down on the opposite side from me. She started getting all of her things out of her bag pack and I grabbed my booking. Maybe she wanted to get this over with for all I know!
I went back to staring at Bella while she got ready to get to work and I know for a fact that she knew I was watching her because that amazing blush that only Bella is capable of producing showed up in her cheeks. She was the one who broke the silence and snapped me out of my indecency.
"Ok well let's get started with this thing… God knows how long it's going to take us" she said. I started looking at my book trying to look like I was here for the same reasons she was… to study. Yeah right… bleh!!!
"Oh yeah… hmm we should start by reading the story. Do you want to read out loud or do you want me to read it?" I asked her. For some weird reasons, Bella's chocolate eyes shifted from nervousness to mischievousness.
"You go ahead and read it" she said nonchalantly.
I started reading "Hills Like white Elephants" by Ernest Hemingway and from my peripheral vision I could still see every Bella's movement. She seemed to calm down a bit after I started reading.
This story was no hard task for me since some of the symbolisms in it were pretty easy to discern.
When I finished reading I placed my book down and looked at Bella straight in the eye. She was looking down at her book but slowly her gaze moved up to meet my eyes.
I could get lost for days in those eyes! They're so beautiful. But at the same time I noticed that I had produced an effect on Bella. When she looked at me in the eye, I could tell she would get flustered and that pinkish color would return to her cheeks. I smiled internally at this discovery and decided to prove my theory. I smiled at Bella and looked at her straight in the eye. She looked shocked and then recognition passed through her face.
She then cleared her throat and looked back down at her book. Her skin was super red and I immediately felt bad for playing mind games with Bella.
"Ok… so let's analyze this then" Bella said… probably to distract me
"It's simple" I said. I think I probably sounded a little cocky, but to me it really was simple.
"How So? Bella asked me in a defying tone… hmm she's passionate then… good, good!
Well bring it on Ms. Bella
"Well let's see, the girl is pregnant, the guy doesn't want the kid, she's talking about random things which in reality symbolize the options they have to whether keep the baby or not, also the elephants can represent the obstacles/the baby that are in their way to happiness… so yeah, very simple" I said, smirking at Bella.
We were both quiet and for just a moment the room and the environment felt much discomforted. Yay we had a perfect example of elephants like hills in this very office. A breather wouldn't come in bad timing right now
"I take it that you're an English major?" she suddenly broke the silence with the question. "I'm actually undecided, but I really like English" I said, a little happy that she was taking an interest.
"Oh I see" she said.
All of the sudden I heard a buzz sound and Bella's face panicked. Her whole personality seemed to contract immediately when she looked down at her phone.
Bella frantically started looking around, almost as if panicked that someone would walk in on us… Studying? Seriously????
I was looking at her shamelessly and Bella just started moving around. She answered a text message and then looked back at me.
"Ok let's keep going" she said as she started typing once again in her laptop.
Curiosity was getting the best of me and I decided to ask her who that was on the phone, although I probably knew who it was.
"Was that your boyfriend?" I asked.
Her face went blank and then full of surprise when she heard my question… that means I'm not wrong.
"Hmm yeah… why do u ask?" She answered back.
"For no reason" I answered quickly. I don't think I could help the wave of disappointment that washed through me. Although I was right, and I could tell Bella's reaction to that asshole, that doesn't mean that she's going to leave him.
In fear that she would notice my reaction, I kept on typing on my laptop and attempted to look busy. The silence in the room felt almost awkward again and for some reason I wanted to get out of here.
It also didn't help that we were in such a small office. I could feel currents of something like electricity floating around.
We then started working on the analysis. It wasn't that hard but it took a lot more time.
Bella had me impressed with how much she knew and how well she could conduct research. She's brilliant.
As we were researching on the author and all of his previous literary work, I found myself wondering why if Bella was such a smart girl, she didn't notice right away that her boyfriend is an asshole. Those thought kept on circling my mind and there was no answer I could find for them.
I wish I could read minds.
At some point while we were working, her phone buzzed again and I was getting ready to see her reaction, but she just closed her eyes, took a deep breath, look at her phone and went back to work.
She looked real serious and almost tense. I figured she wanted to get out of her and I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable. So I tried hurrying up with my side of the research so that she could leave fast.
When we were done, Bella quickly started packing her stuff and putting everything away, without meeting my gaze. I started doing the same as her, and placed my laptop and my book in my bag pack.
"Ok so I'll see you here on Wednesday for the next paper" she told me. A new thought went through my mind but I didn't know how she would take it. Actually I think I had an idea of how she would take it, I just didn't want to hear the words coming from her mouth
"What's wrong?" she asked. She almost looked like she thought I was going to bail on her or something along those lines. I decided to muster some courage and voice my idea…
"It's just that I was thinking that in order to avoid the drive all the way maybe we could do it at my house…?" I told her and asked her at the same time.
"Oh!" was all she said.
She looked like she was giving it a thought and my hope started rising up. Maybe she would come to my house. I knew that if she did we would be more comfortable. She would probably feel safer too. I didn't like the way she looked around all of the time like if somebody was out to get her.
After a while she finally answered "Hmm… I still think we should do it here at the library if you don't mind" she said, her voice almost monotone.
Of course… I thought to myself. I knew she was going to say no… I just was hoping she wouldn't. I grabbed my stuff and started getting up.
"Ok, that's fine with me" I said. The feeling of rejection from Bella made my chest hurt, almost as if someone had punched me right in the chest and I was feeling waves of pain.
I noticed Bella was staring at me so I tried to compose my face.
"Ok well I'll see you tomorrow in class then" she said and with that she walked out of the office. I noticed her body language changed the moment she stepped out of there. Her back was now hunched and I don't think that was due to her bag pack, her hands clung to her side and she was looking down.
I stayed staring at her until she disappeared behind the bookshelves in the library.
I stayed in that office a little longer, wondering how things would be different if Bella didn't have a boyfriend.
When I was driving home a new thought hit me… things would be no different, even if Bella didn't have a boyfriend.
I would still be the broken boy who did nothing to save his girlfriend.
As a matter of fact, if Bella didn't have a boyfriend I probably wouldn't care so much about her and I wouldn't feel the need to protect her all of the time.
Yeah… nothing would be different.
When I got home I felt defeated and I didn't feel like seeing anybody. Luckily no one was home yet. I put my stuff in my room and quickly lost my clothes and put on some swimming trunks… it was weird for it to be a not so cold day here in Forks, so I decided to go swimming.
I dived into the pool and started burning down some energy. I was stressed and I was pissed and I don't know what else I was feeling.
This whole situation was taking its toll on me. I wanted Bella to say yes. I wanted her to get to know me, but for what? So I could then tell her 'you know what? I can't be with you… because I let some asshole kill my girlfriend and I will probably do the same to you'? I don't think so…
Swimming did help my anger… but by the end of the night I was feeling defeated. I skipped dinner and just stayed in my room listening to music. I was not in the mood to see anybody still. So when Alice barged into my room I sure as hell was not going to take it lightly.
"Alice don't you know how to knock!" I told her… pissed as hell.
What pissed me off even more was her reaction. Alice was laughing… I swear one of these days I'm going to buy anesthesia and knock her out for a couple of hours. This girl has way too much energy.
"Oh get off your high horse Edward; here… someone wants to talk to you" she said. It was then that I saw that she had her cellphone in her hands. My heartbeat started to pick up. Only one person would call Alice instead of me… Bella.
"You better not be fucking with me Alice!" I told her, giving her a stern look. Alice's eyes widened and then she put her hand over her mouth. It was then that I realized that if Bella really was on the phone she had heard me curse at my sister… very smooth asshole!
I grabbed the phone from Alice and shooed her away with my hand… instead she acted like she was admiring everything in my room. Nosy troll!!!
"Hello?" I said into the phone. My heart was beating erratically and when I heard Bella speak… it went in double mode.
"Hey Edward this is Bella, sorry to be bugging you so late at night" she said. Bella sounded a lot better than what she looked at the library. She almost sounded confident.
I felt the urge to smile and Alice was making 'I told you so' faces at me. I started to chuckle but then thought Bella would think I was rude for laughing at her.
"Bella, its ok don't worry, I was still up anyways. What's going on?" I asked, curious to know what was in her mind.
"I just wanted to tell you that yeah… we can work at your house on Wednesday if you want to" Holy Cow!!! Man I couldn't believe she had just said that.
"Oh are you serious?" I asked with my still surprised tone. Finally my damn day was turning around. "Oh we don't have to if you can't anymore…" she said, sounding a little hurt. Maybe she thought I was being an asshole to her.
"No its ok Bella we can do it here. I'll give you the address tomorrow in class ok?" I said back to her.
"Yeah that's ok, thanks Edward" she said, but her voice changed so much. She sounded sad and it almost broke my heart to think that she was going through something painful.
"Ok, no problem" I said to her, but in the back of my mind, I was still wondering what was wrong with Bella.
"Well good night Edward, I'll see you tomorrow." She said. I knew our call was ending so I quickly spoke again.
"Bella? Can I ask you something?" I hope she didn't get mad because I was going to ask this.
"Hmm sure" she said almost not sure that she wanted me to ask her anything.
"Are you sure everything is ok… you sound like you've been crying" I told her.
She stayed quiet for a while and I was about to talk to her to make sure she was ok, but she spoke again.
"I wasn't ok but trust me, I'm so much better now" she said. Ok… did I just hear that? Did Bella just imply that I had something to do with making her feel better?
I thought my heartbeat was going fast before… well now it felt like it would burst out of my chest from all the pumping it was doing.
I decided to answer back to her but she went first.
"Good night Edward" she said, and I decided to talk.
"Good night Bella, and don't worry I'll always make you feel better" I said, and with that I hung up the phone.
What. The. Fuck.
Did I just say that? Really, are you serious? Oh my goodness! I can't believe those words just fell out of my damn lips. I could feel myself hyperventilating and I could also see Alice staring at me like she was a blind person seeing the light for the first time.
I really hoped that Bella didn't take that as a sexual innuendo… or maybe I did hope for it. hmm… I don't know…
"What the hell was that?" Alice asked me, still staring at me. I snapped out of my reverie and decided it was time to deal with Alice.
"None of your business you nosy troll" I told her playfully. She looked at me pouting and almost about to cry.
"Edward you can't do that to me… please tell me why you have a damn smile plastered in your face?" she was pleading now…. No I was not going to spill.
"Nothing is going on Alice… now can you please get out so I can sleep?" I asked, though I knew very well that sleep was the last thing on my mind right now.
Alice face became angry and then threatening… it almost scared me. "Fine I'll just call Bella right now" she said… oh crap I am scared…
"Don't you dare Alice… you're going to get the girl in trouble with that asshole" I said with panic in my voice. I don't want Bella to get hurt.
"Fine then tell me or I'll do it I swear" Alice threatened me again. Ugh I hate it when she does this!!!
So I told Alice everything… and to say she was excited was an understatement…
I finally kicked her out of the room when she started jumping around. She pouted a little but she was too happy to look sad… it was kind of entertaining but I knew that she would never leave if I didn't rein her enthusiasm in.
She finally left and her last words were now stuck in my mind. Right before she closed the door she told me "I told you this semester would be different" and then walked off.
Right at this moment I couldn't agree more with Alice… hell yeah this semester was different… as a matter of fact, this semester was spinning my world around and upside down… but I'm not complaining if my world is left upside down. I was ok with that.
Ant it had all to do with a sweet and small girl named Bella.
A/N: so what did you guys think? Don't forget to comment! Thanks
