Disclaimers: Please refer to previous chapters.

Chapter 8: Tugging Won't Work

Solo was insane.

Duo was sure of it.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow," Duo protested, trying to slap away the angel's tugging hands. "It's not going to get me out of this, Solo. Stop it."

Solo growled, braced his legs on Duo's shoulder and continued to pull on the other man's hair. "Get. Out. Of. This. In. Fer. Nal. Bo. Dy." He punctuated each syllable with a strong jerk. "You're going to get me banished into the postal room."

Duo caught hold of the angel's arms and flipped him over. He probably should thank God that the angel was actually quite weightless as most ghosts were. As it was, Solo flew across the room and smashed against the couch. It was also a blessing that Solo couldn't be hurt, or not, Duo would be hurt rather badly. Vengeful angels were something to behold.

"It isn't my fault, Solo," Duo protested. "Leggo! I didn't know that the body wasn't going to let me go."

Solo stood on the other side of the room, panting for breath. Duo found that odd. Did the dead need air? He sure as hell didn't eat anything for months. His friend jabbed a finger at him irately. "You should have just left things alone. What possessed you to possess…" Solo took a deep breath. "Let's try this again. What were you thinking?"

Duo sat in a corner, trying very hard to stop pouting like a little kid and succeeding… very badly. "I was thinking of Heero," he groused finally. "I was thinking of what he would feel to see someone else he cared about die. I was thinking I don't want him hurt anymore."

Solo crossed his arms in front of him. "In other words, you didn't think?"

Duo started and nodded sheepishly. He hated it when Solo was right. Hell, he hated it when anyone other than himself was right. "What am I going to do now? What has happened to me?"

"I really don't know." Solo ran his fingers through his hair, looking absolutely baffled. "There shouldn't be a reason why you are stuck. There isn't anything holding you onto your…" His eyes fixed on Duo's chest, currently being covered by the other man's hand, who also realised the implications.

"My heart won't let me leave," Duo whispered reverently, his eyes faraway.

Solo cringed. From his tone, the angel knew that Duo wasn't talking about the beating appendage lodged in his chest cavity. He knew Duo was talking about the sappier version, namely a Heero Yuy. He took a deep breath. "So, until you can ensure your…" He gulped, trying to control his gag reflex. "…heart will not try to take the easy way out."

"And how will that happen?"

Solo pondered, his brows furrowed in concentration. "Give him someone new to love?"

Duo looked properly appalled. In fact he looked like he was told he needed to gouge his eyes out with his fingers. "What?" He whispered, his voice shadowed with pain, with hurt. He leaped up, grabbing onto Solo like a lifeline. It was almost like asking him to give up his freaking limbs. "But… but aren't the Archangels going to give me back a body? So I can live again?"

Solo shook his head. "You misunderstand, little brother. You are dead. There would be no exhuming your body. When the Archangels said 'reinstated to your body' they meant to give you a new one, and let you back down to Earth on the priority list. You don't need to wait in queue like the others."

Duo stumbled away from the angel, his legs wobbling unsteadily. He dropped gracelessly onto the bed, his body shaking. "They lied?"

Solo's expression was etched with sympathy, but he was done with coddling Duo. He sat down next to his friend and placed an arm around the shivering shoulders. He was shaken bad. "No, they didn't lie. They have a different meaning from they said. For them, a body is merely another body. Reinstating you into one doesn't mean a thing for them. It could just be any other one."

Duo swallowed the tears that burned in the back of his eyes, feeling a hard, painful lump in his throat. "So they purposely misrepresented the situation?"

Solo nodded solemnly. "Yes, what a bunch of annoying lawyers they turned out to be."

A snort of laughter escaped Duo despite his misery and disappointment. "I thought they were bouncers. Lawyers normally don't look this buffed."

"They didn't when they started but God decided that they looked a little too much like pansies and sicced a fitness trainer on the lot of them."

"Their scars?"

"Oh yeah, lawyers in Heaven?" Solo grinned. "The others whacked the living daylight out of all of them the moment they arrived. That's where all the scars came from. There were a lot of disgruntled people in the administrative building."

If Solo was trying to cheer him up, he was doing a mighty fine job of it. "What are lawyers doing in Heaven?"

Solo shrugged. "It's a joint venture agreement signed by Heaven and Hell. Those that barely made the requirement of entry into Heaven would come in as Archangels, where they would have to repent for eternity doing good. That was the worst punishment God and the Devil could think of. I mean, it would just be way too easy on the lawyers, for them to be submerged in an inferno for eternity. I mean, come on, they are already used to taking the heat."

A real peal of laughter erupted from Duo. He didn't care if it was real or not, he was just glad that his big brother was able to talk him out of his miseries. It was enough that one of them would consider suicide, it sure wouldn't do for him to try it out as well, since killing yourself when you were already dead was just redundant.

"So," Duo began, staring at Solo, rather lost.

"So," Solo smiled sadly, rubbing Duo's back in what he hoped was a soothing manner. He had never really needed to comfort anyone in all his years as a PA. Most of his chargers were completely dizzy to be in Heaven.

"I guess I have to find Heero another love of his life, huh?" Duo choked out bitterly.

Solo gave in and hugged Duo. He was not one for public displays of affection but since this was a dead man's apartment, he guessed it wouldn't hurt; and it was all together not very public. "You will always be the love of his life. How about… we use the term, giving him a reason to stay here until eternity calls for him?"

Duo managed a tiny smile. "And when it's his time, I am going to be camped out in the administrative building with a stupid tent and really loud music."

The angel smiled. "I will be there to make sure no one disturbs you, if I still have my job."

They stared at each other, both having that little sad smile. Duo promised himself he wouldn't cry. After all, he didn't do weepy. But for some reason, tears couldn't be controlled. It was official. He had lost more than his life in this, he would be losing his heart.

XXxxXX

Duo Maxwell was a survivor. He wouldn't be brought down by this. So the next step was to find a partner for Heero Yuy.

Someone he admired, someone he cared for, someone he felt he needed to protect, someone wrapped up in the form of one Relena Peacecraft.

"What?" He blurted when Solo suggested that name. Then he burst into laughter. The image of the Queen of the World next to the Perfect Soldier was almost laughable. But, as his humour died gradually, Duo realised that it was also quite doable.

Heero Yuy might be gay, but he also had a deep affection for Relena. Duo thought that if he had never appeared in Heero's life, the two of them would have ended up together.

Alright, they would have ended up together if Heero didn't succeed in shooting Relena that first day they met.

Solo peered at the suddenly silent Duo. "Are you okay?"

Duo nodded. "Yeah, a little… taken aback by the image, but yeah, I'll deal." Then a thought occurred to him. "Hey, why did every time I tell Heero who I was, I end up with a rather provocative sexual invitation?"

He didn't know that angels could choke. He was rather amused to see Solo trying to do just that. The normally creamy complexion Solo had turned to a mottled red as he choked on his tongue or whatever else he had in his mouth. Coughing ensued soon after with Solo bent over almost half trying to catch his breath.

"What did you say?" Solo managed after he controlled himself.

Duo tried his best not to pout as he related the rather interesting things he had mentioned to Heero and groaned as Solo tried to swallow his tongue again. He wondered if he had finally imitated the colour of a tomato. After all, he felt hot enough to be on fire. He thought back on all the things he had said to Heero Yuy and flushed even harder. Normally, the things he said wouldn't have fazed him; they had a penchant for talking dirty to each other, but this time, it wasn't Duo Maxwell that was talking to Heero Yuy. And that made all the difference in the world.

"It's Steve's fault, isn't it?" Duo complained, twisting the bed spread in his hands.

Solo shook his head. "Duo, you have to understand that he is just as at risk as I am in this case. If anyone found out that he let you down here, that he opened the gates for you, he's off to the postal room with me."

"But… I wouldn't have said anything," Duo protested.

"Oh?" Solo asked with a small quirk of his eyebrow.

Duo had the decency to blush. "Well, that was different. He still didn't need to programme me to say such nauseatingly embarrassing mush."

"Well, it does help deter you," Solo was grinning, the ass.

"Let's not talk about that right now. What are we going to do with Heero?"

"We set him up with Relena," Solo concluded, grinning evilly.

XXxxXX

Duo was polishing off his third helping of eggs that morning. Food had never tasted quite this good in a while. It tasted even better since Heero had come over, in spite of yesterday's horribly embarrassing situation.

He had tried to act like normal, which mean no babbling, no pouncing, no spewing of inappropriate sexual innuendoes. Oh hell, it meant he was trying to act abnormally. He thought back on how Adrian acted when Heero was around.

Okay, he could do this, just think, stick up your ass, stick up your ass, and no one would suspect a thing.

"You're pretty hungry today," Heero smiled, an expression that Duo could see was pretty foreign to his face for a while now.

Where was the Heero that used to smile at every single little thing?

He died with you, a small voice whispered. Well, not really a small voice, it was just Solo hanging around him, providing an annoying monologue about his and Heero's current relationship. If Heero wasn't around, he would have wrestled the annoying angel to the ground.

Duo nodded enthusiastically. "It's been a long time since I tasted your cooking…" He shut up immediately, realising he had said the wrong thing.

A frown formed instantly on Heero's brow. "Have you been skipping meals again?"

Duo took his time chewing and swallowing the last bite he took before answering. He wasn't sure what to answer. Well, dying is rather traumatic, so losing your appetite is rather normal seems a little lame. And since he didn't lie. "Well, eating alone can be rather distasteful," he admitted, not really clarifying what alone meant. When there was an angel perched on the side of your table giving a running commentary on how pizza was going to clog a person's arteries and cause an untimely death, one's appetite would be undoubtedly affected.

Heero smiled. It was one of the sad smiles that Duo wanted to smack off his face. "I know what you mean." And he looked like he really did.

Duo was baffled, what about the other guys? Didn't they have time to have dinner with him? He would have thought at least Quatre would insist that Heero not to be left alone for a prolonged period of time. The Japanese man did have suicidal tendencies and he had shown it off rather flamboyantly. Okay, perhaps this was a good time as any to put his and Solo's plan into action. It hurt him to do so, but he believed this was for Heero's good.

"Perhaps then…" Duo swallowed. "Perhaps it is time to find someone to have dinner with?"

Heero stiffened, looking uncomfortable once more. "Look, Adrian," he started.

It took his entire control but Duo managed to stop himself from blurting out things, that would only confuse Heero more. He raised his hand to stop Heero. "I mean come on, Duo's been gone a while now. What you need is a nice young lady in your life."

Duo gave Heero points for not exploding, only spitting milk all over the counter top, where he proceeded to wipe it clean.

"What?" Heero blurted, his eyes wide when he had managed to clear his nasal tracts.

Duo winked. "I am sure that would be what Duo would have wanted."

Anger sparked in Heero's blue eyes. "What makes you think you know what Duo would have wanted?"

Duo nearly laughed at the irony of it. "You really wouldn't want to know," he muttered under his breath.

"What?" Heero still looked a little pissed.

Duo shrugged, shaking his head. "Never mind. But honestly, I really don't think someone who loves you would actually want to you see you in pain and hurting."

"And horny," Solo piped in, earning a discreet glare from his charge. He stifled a smile at the thought of Duo last night. Having regained a corporeal body did rather odd things to his friend's… libido. Solo had endured an entire night of Duo moaning in his sleep and evidence of what kind of dreams he had splattered all over the sheets in the morning. Then again, the constant calling of 'Oh yes, Heero, yes' was a dead giveaway.

Heero stared down, his fists clenching. "I don't want to talk about it anymore," he said curtly.

Duo opened his mouth, obviously wanting to say more but Solo knocked him smartly on the head. He glared at his friend, who shook his head in warning.

"I'd better go," Heero got up. "Just leave the dishes there, I'll come over later to clean it."

Duo got up so fast he knocked his chair over. He couldn't let Heero go like that. Just because he couldn't tell him exactly who he was doesn't mean that he was going to let Heero walk away from him like that. "Erm," he began uncertainly. "Where are you going?"

Heero shrugged. "Quatre has some… thing going on. He wants me to go."

"The Winner guy? The one who looked like the bottomest bottom to ever bottom?" Duo grinned evilly. He had always wanted to hear that out loud, without Trowa smashing his head into the ground. But he didn't understand why Trowa would do that as well, since it was the nature of that observation that made their relationship work.

If Heero was drinking something, Duo was sure it would have come shooting out of his nose again. As it was, Heero looked about to either faint, or explode from suppressed laughter. He shook his head in resignation. "Trowa would kill you, if he knew you said that about his 'little one'."

"Right, and if Quatre ever heard Trowa call him 'little one' anymore, he would make sure that unibanged idiot was short one of his family jewels. God, the blond airhead is almost as tall as Trowa," Duo quipped.

Heero laughed raucously. "It never occurred to Trowa that Quatre can actually grow up."

"It's his baby blues. They think he's completely innocent."

"They?" Heero asked, smirking.

"They," Duo waved his hand wildly, grinning. "Everyone who thinks Quatre is innocent. You, Wu Fei, Trowa, Sally, every freaking one. I would love to see the looks on their faces when Quatre asks them to buy some chocolate body paint… in bulk."

"I bet Trowa was pleasantly surprised," Heero deadpanned, before losing his composure. Duo laughed along, enjoying the sound of Heero's mirth, something that was long missing from the other person until he realised the Japanese was now staring at him.

"What?" Duo asked, feeling a little self conscious.

"How… how did you know all of that?" Heero asked, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. "You've never met Quatre or Trowa."

Tbc