Chapter 9 – One Kiss Away From Madness
Alex opens the drawer of Justin's dresser and desperately digs under his clothes, but the book is not there anymore. He can only have moved it to somewhere else. This cannot be happening. She needs the book, she needs to make Justin forget about them.
Frustrated about the book, she closes the drawer and leans her elbows over the dresser, rubbing her head. Taking deep breaths is all she can do to calm down.
"Hey!" Justin's voice startles her, coming from behind.
Alex turns around, scared. "Justin!" Only now she realizes she forgot to do the hiding spell.
"You look different." He states with a small voice. Is it good or bad that he noticed? "Did you do something?"
"Uhm!…" Oh, no! She has to thing about something to say. "No! Just a different make-up."
"You look more mature." He says, now with a more depressive tone. His head falls and his eyes aim the ground in a clear signal of his state of mind. Alex knows this face, he is really bothered about something. "Alex, I gotta tell you something."
"Not now, okay! I'm busy. We do this later." She tells in a caring way, trying to spare him a little bit.
But, when Alex tries to move away, Justin takes her hand pulling her back. "Yeah! I know we can't be seen together now. But, just listen for a second, okay?"
Oh, these damn red and teary eyes. Alex has to stop and give him attention. She cannot just walk away from him like that.
"I just need you to know that, no matter what happens, right now, I love you more than anything. Okay?" His tone is so sad. It feels like he is saying this to her for the last time.
"Justin, what…"
Then, Justin interrupts Alex with a kiss. Her whole body trembles. Her legs feel wobbly. And the kiss is amazing. Beyond her control, Alex kisses him back. It feels like she has lost any restraint, any barrier she created to avoid any feeling that could come. Kissing him feels so comfortable.
Then, something clicks in her brain. Alex pushes him away, breathing heavily. When he backs off, she just looks at him, stunned by how she is feeling.
"Go on." Justin tells her, unfazed by her action, as if already expecting for it. "Go do… whatever that was."
Alex can only nod, breathing heavily, her eyes cannot even move away from his for an instant. But she cannot stay here, not running the risk of interfering with the past. So, making an effort to move steadily, she starts to walk away, but then the memory of Justin's state makes her stop and turn back to him. She actually feels horrible for just leaving. "Are… are you alright?" She can only whisper.
"Sure! I'm fine." She knows him too well not to notice his lie. But she has to leave this problem behind. She cannot be here without the hiding spell.
Alex arrives back on her time, in the lair. She sits on the recliner, her heart is pumping hard in her chest, her breathing is heavy, she cannot control herself. The feeling brought by kissing Justin refuses to leave her. Her legs are still wobbly, she can still feel the pressure of his lips on hers.
Now it is so clear. Even though what she and Justin were together was completely erased from her mind, that the spell has taken away the part of hers that once accepted all that he means to her, the feeling for him is still there. As much as she has tried to tell herself this would never happen again, it took only one kiss to shatter the tough front she put on.
Alex doesn't know how this is possible, or even how this could have happened the first time, but she loves Justin. No, this is not it, she is in love with him. She could fight it, yell it is not happening, curse herself, but in the end, she would still feel the same.
What Alex witnessed in the past is the only memory she has of her relationship with Justin, everything they lived together as a couple disappeared after the spell. Still, it took only one kiss to bring back this feeling, to make her feel like they could be a couple again.
This emotion has already found its way in their lives twice. How many times they will have to go through this, especially if Alex goes through with the idea of erasing Justin's memory again? How many times they will have to suffer for fighting what they cannot avoid? Making it go away could only sentence them to go through it all over again. Making them forget would only hurt them more.
Oh, gosh! Alex is actually considering… she is considering giving in. But then, again, this is a decision she already made once, to accept to be with Justin. Is she strong enough? Can she take the risk of ruining everything, for them?
A/N Not the end yet. It will be out very soon.
