Crystal Nothings II: My Wings Angle Down - The Fallen Lithium
Disclaimer: Nintendo, Sega, and Konami own Smash Bros. Brawl!
Poor Sandbag didn't stand a chance against Falchion. Marth may not have been the strongest of fighters, but his agility usually unmatched by anyone, except for Fox, who'd always had his uncanny ability to out-run him in any situation despite those enormous boots he liked to wear. That Sonic seemed to be quite the speedster too, especially when he caught him rushing towards the (first) psychic Pokemon's room.
The blue-haired man always wondered why that was.
He leaped into the air, blade in hand. Stalling in the air, he began to chrage the weapon as he floated gently back towards the platform below. As more and more energy was channeled into it from the Prince's hands, his body and Falchion were surrounded by a sickly blue aura.
When Marth touched the ground, the sword could not take anymore power and he swung it with all of his might, making sure to strike the bag of sand with the very tip of the sword right between its unseeing eyes.
"Ha! My speed takes over again!" Marth cried triumphantly. "3, 485 feet!! And that's without big, scary, Rag--"
The rest of the name of Ike's blade was cut off as a brief flash of screaming white wings streaked by him nearly at the speed of light.
"Damn," Marth swore as he watched Pit run, "He's fa--"
The Altean Prince was cut off again as another, much darker streak rushed by, moving equally quickly.
"YOU WINGED RAT!!" Ganondorf screamed. "YOU'RE GOING TO GET IT!"
"AAAAAAAHHHHH!" was the reply.
Somewhat comically, Marth could almost see the trail created by the rushing feet on the carpeted hallways.
"Guys, stop it!" a familiar voice cried. "I'm sure it was just an accident!"
Link, moving considerably slower than the other two, stopped running upon reaching Marth, panting and gasping for a little air for his deflated lungs.
Marth, being the kind soul that he was, helped bring Link to his feet and drape an arm around his caped shoulder.
"So, what in the world was that all about?"
"Ugh.. gasp, argh... Oh, man was it ever... awk-WARD!" a panting Hero of Twilight said.
"What happened?"
"Well, Ganondorf was rooming with me, and..." he paused his story, blushing furiously at the look he was given, before continuing, "and... when we woke up in the morning, Pit was lying on his other side, all wrapped up in his arms!"
"So what are you going to do?" Marth asked, his effeminate features providing a mixture of confusion and amusement.
Link smiled warmly with his eyes shut as he stared up at the ceiling, taking a moment to think. "Well... I'm sure it was just an accident. I mean, he did just awaken from a coma, and they probably ended up curling up together in their sleep. It's no big deal. I'll set them straight."
Marth stood motionless, staring blankly at the other swordsman for a while. Had he heard Link right? He'd just brushed off the whole incident as if his ex-boyfriend hadn't just awakened from a seven-month coma. He was acting as though... some random guy that he lived with that he didn't know that well had just awoken from a seven-month coma.
"Link?" Marth asked, tight-lipped.
"What is it, Marth?"
"That's all you have to say? I mean... that's Pit. Pit. Pit?" Marth repeated the name again and again, wondering if it would somehow register through auditory memory.
Link gave a grin. "Yeah, great kid. Real big help during that Dark Samus thing! Didn't really know him too well, though. I mean," he chuckled, "it's not like I was dating him or anything, right? It's not something you make a big deal over."
Weapons clattering against his back, the Hero dashed off without another word, probably to stop a highly likely case of first-degree murder.
Marth just stared even after he disappeared around the corner. Didn't know him too well...? Not like they were dating? This was so strange. Not only had Link and Pit dated, but Pit had done the very equivalent of damn well proposing marriage! Then he saved all of their asses from that freaky Samus clone.
What was going on?
It wasn't very prince-like to swear. But the blue-haired monarch couldn't stop himself from doing so in this extremely odd situation.
"Some weird shit is going on around here."
The angel's sandals made panicked flap, flap sounds on the carpet as he dashed down the hall, nearly bowling over Mr. Game & Watch and R.O.B. who were having some strange discussion.
"Beep, beep!"
"Most observant, Mr. Game. You are paper-thin, whereas everything else here is not."
"Bip boo beep bip!"
"It is certainly a strange phenomena. On the Isle of Ancients, where I come from, we never experienced things as strange as this."
"BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!"
R.O.B. didn't have time to heed the 2D man's warning as Ganondorf blasted him into the roof as he rushed past, chasing after Pit.
The robots wheels rolled about in circles in a futile attempt to break free of the mortar that bound him.
"Mr. Game," R.O.B. stated in his flat monotone. "Some assitance. I'm afraid Gandrayda is currently whacking me on my cranium with a hair-dryer."
"Ugh!" came the shape-shifter's voice from above. "Who knew robots were such perverts?! Get out!" A frightening sound in close proximity to that of a Final Smash was heard, and R.O.B. hit the floor hard, and sat there dazed for a short time.
"Bip?!" Mr. Game & Watch asked in a concerned beep?
"Circuits rebooted," R.O.B. stated. "All operations back online. That was quite a fall..."
Three hallways and two staircase ahead and below that scene, Pit was still running for his newly reawakened life. "Get away, Ganondorf! I should be chasing you! You were sleeping with my boyfriend!!"
Flapping furiously, Pit managed to avoid a dark sphere of purple energy that exploded near his foot. He touched back down and continued running, knowning he moved faster that way.
"I'm afraid you lost your boyfriend when you decided to take a nap!" The Gerudo emphasized that last word with another energy blast moving ahead of him. "All's fair in love and war!"
"Hnnn!" Pit grunted as the blast struck his back. His teeth clenched together and with a gentle rustling, he hit the ground. Hard. Combined with his lack of oxygen from running, and the pain in his backside, it was hard for him to get up. "Urrnnngghh," he groaned, struggling against his exhausted body.
He was pinned down instantly by the heavy weight of Ganondorf's body, who was now straddling his back. Looking up at his assailant, Pit screamed in terror.
An almost demonic grin was plastered across Ganondorf's face, and his fist glowed with dark magic.
"You..." he hissed, "should have stayed asleep."
Toon Link stretched as he stepped into the hallways outside of his room, feeling the effects of a good rest. Granted, he'd been dreaming about Wolf as far as he could remember, which may or may not have contributed.
At any rate, he felt good.
His first thought was: coffee. Funny, how addicted to the drink he'd become. It was even funnier that Wolf himself had been the one to introduce him to it. Toon Link may have only been thirteen years old now, but he felt like an adult when he drank coffee, and he was sure what Wolf wanted was an adult, not a kid. So that's how that was.
Besides, his fourteenth birthday was a mere two weeks away. Then he could prove how mature he was!
Tmp, tmp, tmp, tmp, tmp, tmp. The younger Link loved the sounds his barefeet made against the hallway floor as he rushed the way of the kitchen, hoping to get at the coffee before Wario took it all. Again. Maybe Wolf would be in there too...
"Good goddesses, I am such a creeper," he murmured to himself.
Whistling, he was making headway down the back stairs to the kitchen, hoping to sneak up on the unsuspecting coffee pot. Predator-prey relationship, they called it. Toony reminded himself to stop watching National Geographic.
"...I should be chasing you! You were sleeping with my boyfriend!!"
"I'm afraid you lost your boyfriend when you decided to take a nap!"
Those voices...
"Pit and Ganondorf?!" Toon Link asked out loud, even though he wouldn't get an answer. "But in order for Pit and Ganondorf to be arguing... Pit would have to awake... what could you they be fighting about...?"
...my boyfriend...
...my boyfriend...
...my boyfriend...
"Oh, no," Toony moaned. For a moment, he wondered why the mansion was echoing him before he realized that Pit was moaning! And it wasn't the good kind! "Hang on, Pit. I'm coming!"
Coffee forgotten for now, Toon Link rushed to his bedroom and grabbed his sword, sheild, bow, boomerang, and his bombs. Retracing his steps, he found himself at the back kitchen doors again. Running towards the scream that ripped through the building like an atomic bomb, he turned the corner just in time...
...to see Ganondorf sitting on Pit's back, his dark fist ready.
"You... should have stayed asleep. I won't have you getting in the way of what I want."
"No!" the little Hero cried. Drawing his bowstring taught, he fired one of his arrows as fast as they would allow. Simulators ever absent, rather than simply knocking its target and making his damage climb, it pierced his flesh and made him bleed.
"Agh..." Ganon's fist lost its source of power and died out. The ex-King of Evil rolled off of his victim, holding his arm in cursing pain. "You little welp!"
Groggily, Pit lifted his head to look at his saviour. "Toon Link...?" he asked weakly. "You saved me?!" Pit had never thought much of the boy before, but now, seeing him standing there, crouched down with his bow in hand and animated eyes stony with anger, he looked like a true Hero.
Pit wondered if this was how the people of the Great Sea saw him when they were all resuced. Of course, this was before he blacked out from stress and exhaustion.
"Pit!" Toon Link ran hurriedly to his side and bent over, examining him, thanking Faeroe Pit was just unconscious, hopefully not comatose.
SQUELCH!!
The sickening sound filled the thin corridor as Ganondorf slowly pulled Toony's projectile out of his arm with a satisfied grunt, allowing his blood to flow freely into the open.
They whirled to face each other. One could almost imagine the tumbleweed that didn't roll by as they stopped and stared, waiting, just waiting for something to happen.
"What in the name of...?" Link had arrived, and he was glancing from Pit's sleeping form, to Toon Link and Ganondorf's battle of the eyes, and backing again. "What happened here? Why is he asleep on the hall floor?"
"Link!" his younger self cried in relief. "Thank the goddesses you're here!" He planted his feet next to his counterpart, pointing accusingly at the enemy. "He," Toon Link stated, "was going to kill Pit!"
"What?" Ganondorf laughed. "Don't be ridiculous, little welp! I wasn't going to kill him, per se. I was just going to rough him up a little so he got the picture."
"Woah," Link said angrily, "Don't talk to him like that. He's my closest friend. I don't know why you two have such an animosity with each other. The past is the past, so just forget it." He turned the speech away from Toon Link and headed it full-force on his new boyfriend. "Ganondorf, if you and I are going to work, than you have to get along with Toony! You may not like him, but damn it, you're going to pretend. Because I'm not picking sides! I've done enough of that."
Stalking away, leaving all three of them behind, Link headed for the kitchen. Ganondorf didn't even flinch as Toon Link ran past him to get to his older self.
"Wait a minute! Link! Wait!" Just reaching the kitchen door, there was a pause.
"What, Toony? I'm not really in the mood right now..."
"What crawled up your butt?" Pulling out the famous line, Toony's eyes blazed with rage. "Pit's awake, and you're lecturing Ganondorf about how you guys are going to work? You should be going back to Pit, not staying with him!"
"Go back to him? How in the hell am I supposed to do that?"
"Oh gee, I dunno... because you were in love with him?!"
"What the fuck are you talking about Toon Link? I can't be in love with someone I've spoken to all of three times!"
Rage immeadiately gone, Toon Link's lips took on that "o" of confusion. "...What?"
Rolling his eyes, Link cried, "Goddesses, Toony! You're acting so weird, just like Marth was today! Why does everyone seem to think I like Pit?"
His question was met with Toon Link's blank stare. "You... you and Pit dated for eight months, Link! That's why!"
A slight hint of blue began to creep onto Link's delicate skin. "PIT AND I NEVER DATED!!" he screamed. "What is wrong with all of you?!"
Destination forgotten, Link trudged back up the stairs. The resounding slam of his dormitory door echoes throughout the halls.
When Ganondorf, Toon Link, and Pit (who cursed himself from having been reawakened for the fourth time in two days), arrived at the kitchen, all of the others were silent as a tomb.
"Pit..." Meta Knight spoke up.
"You're awake!" Peach chimed in happily, clapping her hands together.
The expected flurry of questions came.
"Are you feeling alright?"
"Can I get you some soup?"
"How in the world are you able to walk after all of this time?"
"Yoshi yoshi bilerabileraboooo!"
"WOO-HOO! I GOT IT!"
Everyone turned to stare blankly at Mario, who was clutching thin air with his fist raised and a triumphant smirk. When he noticed a room full of none-too-pleased eyes trailing on him, he slowly lowered his hand and stared into his Eggs Benedict.
"What? I was-a talking! It was-a very rude of you to-a interuppt!"
Ignoring him again, they returned to Pit and his miraculous ability to walk.
"Uhm, thank you everybody," Pit said, nervously. "But I can assure you, I'm fine. I think Palutena was watching over me!"
His warm smile seemed to make all of the worry in the room melt away, save of course, for Ganondorf, who's smoldering glare was ever focused on the upstart angel. Suddenly very dizzy, Pit plopped into the nearest chair, between Luigi and Pikachu. Even sitting down, he could feel his legs wobbling.
"Welcome back, Pit," Luigi said calmly, chewing on green mushroom of some type. "It's good to see you at this table again."
"Thank you, Luigi." Pit's stomach rumbled suddenly, and he remembered he'd been eating nothing but pure nutrients ground into a toothpaste-like substance.
Even Kirby was in shock as he watched Pit basically vacuum up the entire table of solid food like he'd never eating a thing in his life. The room was like a big mess of forks, spoons, knives, napkins and Pokemon flying about in various direction as Pit dashed about, grabbing random items of food and shoving them into his mouth.
After about forty seconds of feeding insanity, Pit sat down, fully satiated, and rubbing his belly gingerly. "Okay, I am so full."
Certainly he was full. The only articles of food that managed to survive the massive attack were two strips of bacon, a Super Mushroom, and several assorted hard-boiled eggs in assorted colours.
Thankfully, the other Smashers' plates had remained untouched by the angel's assault, and they dug in almost fearfully, in case Pit decided he was hungry again.
"So," Captain Falcon whispered over to Pit from the other side of Pikachu. "I heard that-- oh crap, hang on, I can't talk like this."
Pikachu promptly screamed in terror as he was lifted above Captain Falcon's head, wriggling furiously. "Pika pika pikachu pi!"
Answering his demands, the former bounty hounter slammed the mouse Pokemon into his old seat, much to the frustration of Gandrayda.
"Anyway," Douglas continued as if he hadn't just seat-napped an innocent Pikachu, "Link supposedly got with Ganondorf."
No longer filled with that content feeling that came from a full stomach, Pit simply stared at the floor, with his eyes narrowed. "I know. Ganondorf--"
"--attacked him in the hallway!" Toon Link was blabbing to Wolf and Zelda. The princess's eyes were wide with interest. "He was about to punch his lights out, but I got him with an arrow just in time!" The boy made the motion of shooting an arrow from the Hero's Bow with his arms.
"Wow," Zelda gasped, "So he is still up to no good. What a bastard!"
The news of Ganondorf's attack on Pit spread across quickly, and before long, not even Bowser would talk to the Gerudo, and he sat by himself at the end of the table, eating all by himself.
How dare they? Ganondorf thought to himself, rage boiling up inside of him again. Stupid winged rat had it coming to him. He shouldn't left Link alone. The Hero of Twilight has what I want, and Pit is in the way, I'm going to get it, no matter how much blood I have to spill.
Leaving the rest of his food behind, Ganondorf stood up and left the room.
Wolf watched him go with little interest, his left ear only half-listening to the little Link ramble on about who-knows-what. He had more important things to worry about then what was going on between Ganondorf/Link/Pit. He had his own little damn triangle he had to work with.
Fox was straight across the table from him, not looking up at anybody as he ate. Similarly, Falco was staring into his food exactly two seats away from him. From above, it would have looked like a triangle. Wolf hadn't had the oppurtunity to talk to Fox since they had kissed at the fountain.
"I'll get him after breakfast..." he muttered.
"What?" asked Toon Link, looking irritated his story had been interuppted.
"Nothing."
Out of nowhere, his chair scraped against the tiled floor as he stood up and gave his companions a non-chalant wave. "Gotta go somewhere. Don't wait up for me." And he stalked off.
Zelda just shrugged and urged Toon Link to continue with his conspiracy theory. He always seemed to be coming up with one of those.
Wolf didn't go far, just around the other side of the doorway, where he was hidden in the shadows and no one could see him.
Including Fox McCloud.
Dear Smashers,
It had been brought to my attention that the angel Pit has been reawakened from the coma that was the result of the events that occured last year. Pit has been worked into the schedule of the tournament and will battle in the near future.
Tomorrow, a match between:
Toon Link vs. Ganondorf
will take place at the Brawl dome at 5:00pm. Will these two smashers please be certain that they are in attendance.
Thank you
Master and CrAZZeeeeEee
