Family is Where the Heart is

Chapter 9

The Winchesters trudged through the woods of Blackwater, Colorado on yet another hunt. They were hiking with two other siblings who were looking for their brother, and some guy who thought he knew it all when it came to the wilderness and regular game hunting. It seemed there were animal attacks on campers, never to be seen again. The siblings' brother normally checked in every day but hadn't the last couple of days which concerned them. Now, while they looked for their brother, the Winchesters were hiking with them to protect them and hunt whatever it was that were attacking campers while looking for John in the process.

Dean noticed Sarah was bringing up the rear, watching the ground as she walked. He slowed down, eating a bag of peanut M&Ms. "M&Ms for your thoughts?" he smirked, holding the open end of the bag towards her.

Sarah looked up at it, and shook her head. "No thanks, I can't."

"Why not?" he asked, plopping a small handful in his mouth.

"I'm allergic to any kind of nut," she replied. "I can't even eat peanut butter."

"Seriously?"

Sarah nodded.

"Isn't chocolate a nut?" he asked.

She looked at her father like he was a nut. "Chocolate's a bean, Dad."

"Right, anyway, what's wrong?" Dean changed the subject, wanting to know why his little girl was walking so slow and not paying attention like she should be.

Sarah shrugged, "Nothing, just thinking about the last few weeks."

"It's a lot to take in, huh?"

She nodded. "But the thing is I feel better being with you than I ever had with my other family."

"What do you mean?"

"I never fitted in with my mom and grandparents. Mom always criticized me for reading monster lore and folk tales, that's why she agreed to let Papa pay for those psy-collie-gist visits. They all thought I was a freak, Dad, I know it." Tears started forming on the last part. "And I know Mom was scared of me."

"Why would your mom be scared of you and keep your voice down, kid," he told her.

Sarah looked away, her hands in the pocket of her sweatshirt. "I'm different. I know I shouldn't have but I read Mom's journal once. It said that she wanted to have an abortion when I was in her tummy. When I asked Gram what that was she said it's when a mom kills her baby when it's still growing in her tummy." Sarah stopped walking and completely faced her father. Dean stopped as well. "Mom didn't want me, Dad!" She couldn't help her voice rise as hot tears fell down both sides of her cheeks. "The journal also said that some guy talked her into keeping me. It took a complete stranger to change her mind."

Everyone else had stopped walking and looked back to see what was going on. Dean told them to keep going and kneeled to his daughter's level. "Hey, look at me," he told her.

Sarah sniffed, looking into her father's face.

"I'm very proud you are my kid. I would be lying if I said that back when you were born but I was pretty much still a kid, myself. Your mom and grandparents, they didn't know what to think about this stuff because they weren't educated on it. They don't know the truth like we do and that's what scared them. That's how most people react when someone is a certain way they can't explain. Your mom saw you read about things most kids are afraid of so she went out and found help on what to do. I'm sure your mom loved you."

"She never wanted to hug me," she sniffed. "I was like poison to her."

"No I'm sure you weren't, she was just scared."

Sarah threw herself onto her father and squeezed his neck, tightly. Dean stood up, holding her in his arms. "It's okay, Sarah." He turned and kept walking, carrying Sarah for a little while so she could compose herself. After fifteen minutes though, he made her walk again. Sarah and Dean brought up the rear of the group.

Soon, the group stopped. "This is it," the travel guide announced, "Blackwater Ridge."

Sam walked ahead of him, looking straight ahead. "What coordinates are we at?" he asked.

The guide took out his electronic compass and turned it on, looking up the coordinates. "Thirty-five minus one eleven."

Dean, followed by Sarah walked over to stand beside Sam, looking out at the woods. "You hear that?"

"Yeah…not even crickets," replied Sam.

"I'm gonna go have a look around," the guide said.

"You shouldn't go off by yourself," Sam told him.

He had his arms folded in front of him, "That's sweet. Don't worry about me." The guide then walked in between the small family, continuing on.

Dean walked a few steps and turned around. "All right, everyone stays together. Let's go." And he continued walking, as well. Sarah hurried after him, glued to his side.

The group continued through the woods until they found the siblings' brother's campsite, in ruins as if a bear or wolf had done it. Dean found tracks, off some distance from the site and called Sam over to show him.

"The bodies were dragged from the campsite," he explained to Sam and Sarah. "But here, the tracks just vanish. It's weird." Dean stood up, straight as he looked ahead. "I'll tell ya what. It's no skinwalker or black dog." He turned and walked back to the group.

Sarah asked, "Black dog?" She hurried after him. "Like the movie? The black dog story is real?"

"Yes but not how they tell it," he replied. "I'll tell ya later."

Soon, they heard a male's voice cry out. After checking it out and returning to camp, the group discovered their packs missing. Sam figured it out, right then and there that they were hunting a Wendigo. Since it was getting late and no one would leave, Dean suggested they'd call it a night and set up camp. The guide and the siblings sat by a campfire while Sam sat, a few feet away, staring at the ground.

Sarah wandered over to her uncle, holding her hands pressed into her armpits. "Uncle Sam, mind if I sit with you? The fire's not helping."

Sam looked up. "Sure, kiddo."

Sarah sat down and snuggled up against her uncle. Sam wrapped his left arm around her. "Are you okay, Uncle Sam?" she asked him.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he assured her.

"Doing some thinking, too?"

Sam forced a smile for his niece. "I guess you can say that. What are you thinking about?"

"My mom."

"You miss her, huh?"

"A little but I know she's in a better place with the angels," Sarah said.

"Oh, you believe in angels?" Sam asked.

"Papa and Gram took me to church with them, a lot. I learned a lot in my Sunday school class about how when we accept Jesus, we go to heaven when we die and how angels watch over us."

"That's a load of crap, Sarah." Dean was walking up to the two of them, his hands in the pockets of his jacket. "Angels aren't real and I don't want to hear about them again."

"Angels are real, Dad," Sarah told her father.

"Fine, believe what you like but keep it to yourself." Dean turned his attention to his brother. "You want to tell me what's going on in that freaky head of yours, Sam?"

"Dean…" Sam started to say but Dean cut him off.

"No, you're not fine," he said, sitting on Sarah's opposite side. "You're like a powder keg, man. It's not like you. I'm supposed to be the belligerent one, remember?"

There was a long, silent pause. The only sounds were the crackling of the campfire and crickets chirping away without a care in the world. Finally, Sam said, "Dad's not here. I mean, that much we know for sure, right? He would have left us a message. A sign, right."

Dean was looking up at the night sky. "Yeah, you're probably right. To tell you the truth, I don't think Dad's ever been to Law's Creek."

"Then let's get these people back to town and let's hit the road. Go find Dad." Sam threw a stick he had been holding onto the ground with force, "I mean, why are we even still here?"

Dean made Sarah, who had laid her head against him, sit up, and moved to the rock across from Sam. He took out John's journal and tapped it with his whole hand. "This is why. This book." Dean tapped it with his pointer finger. "This is Dad's single and most valuable possession. Everything he knows about every evil thing is in here and he's passed it onto us. I think he wants us to pick up where he left off. You know, saving people, hunting things. The family business."

Sam shook his head, trying to wrap his head around what his brother just told him, "That makes no sense."

Sarah sat up from where she was leaning against her uncle again. "It makes sense to me and I'm a kid."

Dean raised his eye brows. "Kid's got a point. See?"

"But why doesn't he just call us? Why doesn't he tell us what he wants? Tell us where he is?" Sam questioned, quietly. The Winchesters had been keeping their voices to just above a whisper.

"I don't know," Dean admitted. "But the way I see it, Dad's given us a job to do and I intend to do it."

"Dean…" Sam changed his tone. "No. I got to find Dad. I got to find Jessica's killer."

"But didn't you say that even if we find it, it won't change the fact that they're dead and they're not coming back?" Sarah spoke up. "Kind of sound like a hypocrite, Uncle Sam."

"It's the only thing I can think about, and you just wouldn't understand, Sarah."

"You're talking to a kid who can recite words that I don't even know the meanings of, plus name all forty presidents," said Dean.

"It's forty-three, Dad," Sarah corrected him.

"Whatever, the point is, Sam, we will find Dad, I promise. Listen to me, you got to prepare yourself. I mean, this search can take a while. And all that anger, you can't keep it burning over the long haul. It's gonna kill you. You gotta have patience, man."

"How do you do it?" Sam forced a laugh. "How does Dad do it?"

Dean looked over at the siblings, then back at Sam. "Well, for one, them."

Sam and Sarah looked over at the siblings.

"I mean, I figure if our family is so screwed to hell, maybe we can help some others. Makes things a little more bearable."

"So, we're like the Rescue Rangers," Sarah asked, "only with monsters?"

"No idea who they are but yeah, basically," he replied. "I'll tell ya what else helps, Sammy." Sam faced him again. "Killing as much sons of bitches as I can." Dean smiled at that, making Sam smile, too. He knew just what to say to make his younger brother feel better. Always looking out for Sam.

Suddenly, the same cry for help interrupted the brotherly chat. Everyone jumped to their feet. Dean and the guide had their guns out. "It's trying to draw us out," Dean told them. "Just stay cool, stay put."

"Inside the magic circle?" the guide asked, sarcastically with his rifle pointed up.

"Dad, can I hit him?" Sarah asked, annoyed.

"As much as I would like to say yes and how much the guy needs it, no," Dean replied, his eyes scanning the trees around them.

Rustling and movement was detected. The Wendigo had found them and of course, the guide had to go after it. The Winchesters followed after him but it was too late. He was gone.

Sarah shrugged, "Don't mean to sound mean but uh, he was asking for it. They're usually the first ones to go in the movies."

After Dean explained what a Wendigo was, the group continued the next day without the guide. Soon, they found the guide's body when it was tossed from a tree, almost flattening the girl. Everyone took off running. Sarah kept tripping over tree roots and rocks, falling forward. Sam went back to help his niece up. Because of that, the two of them and the girl's younger brother was separated from her and Dean.

"Dean!" Sam called out.

No answer.

"Sorry, Uncle Sam," said Sarah as she rubbed her arm, up and down, ashamed.

"It's okay, Sarah," he told her. "Come on, you two."

The two of them went looking for Dean and the girl until they came to a boarded up cave with a Do Not Enter sign on it. The boy and Sarah followed Sam inside. Sam led the way down a dark tunnel with only a flashlight to light the way. Sarah gripped his jacket, tightly in her right hand as they walked. When they heard a growl, she hugged his leg.

Sam pushed Sarah and the boy back, along the wall of the tunnel with their backs pressed against it. They watched as a thin shadowy creature walked away from them. Sam had to cover the boy's mouth to keep him from making a sound. Sarah, on the other hand, was speechless. Her little heart was beating fast like it was going to leap out of her chest. She was wishing her father was there right about now.

When the coast was clear, the three of them continued walking. The boy stepped on a weak piece of wood and they all fell through, into a hole. Bones littered the ground around them, scaring both the boy and Sarah. Sam calmed them both down.

It was Sarah who noticed Dean and the girl hanging by their hands, from the ceiling. She ran over to them. "Daddy!" She tried getting him to wake up, shaking his legs.

Sam came up and helped, too. "Dean," he said. "Dean, you okay?" when Dean was awake.

Dean grunted a few times before he replied, "Yeah."

Sam cut the both of them down and he led Dean over to set him down while the boy did the same for his sister. Sarah tried to help, too but with her small size and Dean's larger, adult body, she wasn't really much use. Sam carried most of his brother's weight while Dean did what he could. When the siblings noticed their long lost brother was also there, Sam hurried over with them while Sarah stayed back with her father, hugging his neck.

"Okay, okay, Sarah," he told her, pushing Sarah off. "We need to stay focused here, okay?"

She nodded.

Dean curiously looked inside one of the packs that were sitting near the two of them and found flare guns, calling Sam's attention. He handed one to Sarah. "These are flare guns and you only get one shot so make it count or that's it. Got it?"

Sarah nodded, "Yes, Dad."

Continuing on, with the siblings carrying their brother, the Winchesters kept them covered with the flare guns raised. Dean told the siblings to stay with Sam and Sarah that they would get them out. Sarah insisted on going with Dean.

"You said I never leave your side."

"You'll be with Sam, it's okay," he told her.

"No, I want to go with you and help."

"You want to help, then stay with Sam, understand?"

"No!"

"Sarah Lynn Winchester, I don't have time for this! Stay with Sam!" Dean exclaimed and ran ahead, turning a corner. Sarah ran after him. Sam tried calling her back but she continued. She lost him once because of the Wendigo, she wasn't about to let it happen again.

When Dean heard her footsteps running after him, he was pissed. They moved through the cave, trying to find it. When they did, the Wendigo was closing in on Sam and the siblings. Dean shot at it, burning it to a corpse. Everyone was relieved. Dean did not stop to breathe, though. Tossing the flare gun to the side, he turned on Sarah and landed a hard swat to her backside with his right hand before he kneeled to her level. "What did I say about following orders during a hunt?" he demanded of his daughter.

Sarah had immediately grabbed her backside, crying out in pain.

"Answer me, Sarah Lynn," he told her, sternly.

Sarah continued to cry, not answering her father.

"Do you want another one?"

She quickly shook her head.

"Then I suggest you answer me."

Sarah sniffed, wiping her face with her arm. "To…obey e-every or-der y-y-you give," she finally answered.

"Then tell me why you disobeyed me?" he asked.

She sniffed, wiping her nose on her arm but didn't answer.

"I'm waiting, Sarah."

"I was scared of losing you again, I wanted to help you."

Dean dropped his head, running his hand along his hair, and then looked up at her. "Sarah, when I give you an order, you have to follow it. It's only for your own good. I'm already a bad father for putting you in this, but that won't mean I won't do everything in my power to protect you and that means you got to do as I say. No ifs, ands, or buts. Understand?"

Sarah nodded, slowly.

Dean took his daughter into his arms and hugged her. "I'm sorry I spanked you so hard. It's just, if anything would to happen to you, like I said, I don't know what I would do. I love you, Sarah."

Sarah hugged him in return. "I'm sorry, Dad."

He kissed the side of her head. "It's okay. You were worried about me. But don't be. I've been doing this most of my life. I'm tough, nothing can kill me."

At the forest lodge, the Winchesters said good-bye to the siblings and Dean even got a kiss from the girl before she got inside the back of the ambulance. The brothers leaned against the front of the Impala, Sarah already passed out in the backseat, snoozing away.

"Man, I hate camping," Dean broke the silence.

"Me, too," agreed Sam as they stared ahead.

"Sam, you know we're gonna find Dad, right?"

Sam nodded, "Yeah, I know. But in the meantime…" He looked at Dean. "I'm driving."

Dean tossed the keys up into the air and Sam caught them before they got into the Impala and drove off.