A/N: Holy crap! I updated! --ish so proud of herself--
Disclaimer: Don't own YGO.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 8: Inside These
Thoughts
He glared at it as his fingers tightened noticeably around the phone. Joey looked at him, confused. "'Kura? Wha—"
"Here." Bakura muttered and dropped the phone into Joey's open hand. He immediately turned his back to the blond, bending over slightly. He didn't see Joey's face become suddenly overwhelmed with puzzlement, only the strands of hair that shadowed his face dramatically. He didn't listen to Joey's questions of if he was alright, but did notice that they all stopped when he read the name.
"Oh. It's Yami. Wow, I betta call 'im back…" Joey's voice mumbled while Bakura's fists clenched. He didn't think Joey took note of this, and he really didn't give a fuck. All he could think about was how idiotic he had been; how brainless and forgetful he was. How could he forget that? How? He had known it for so long, but why did he just now forget all about it? He narrowed his eyes.
He had forgotten that Joey was the enemy…
A damned cheerleader of the damned Pharaoh who had so graciously wrecked his entire life. A supporter of his most greatest and hated foe. The fucking Pharaoh's friend. Bakura shut his eyes, taking a deep breath. Why did he forget for the past two days that the man he had teased and laughed with and joked around with and kissed had such close ties to the Pharaoh? It really didn't seem like something he'd forget just like that. Maybe all what had been going on just affected him somehow to start doing these things? He opened his eyes, and looked at the floor. He stared at it until the carpet suddenly took the form of Marik's face. The face stared right back at him with a look of sheer apathy.
Could he…could he possibly still…still be in…love with Marik? He had run away from the lately returned feelings of the other yami, and had run into Joey. Then it was suddenly kiss-kiss, hug-hug, "see you tomorrow", "certain someone", and him feeling a need to be with Joey. He didn't think about it at first, but now he was suddenly wondering,
Am I just that desperate?
Was he so needy that he'd forget about Joey's and the Pharaoh's relationship? Was he so dependent on another that he felt he had to be close to Joey? Or…or did he just substitute his fear of Marik's feelings for Joey's companionship and care? He did love Marik at one point, but when did he really stop loving him? Had he really stopped loving him at all? How did he know that he just didn't push down the feelings for so long that they had all just numbed? How did he know? Well, he didn't.
And he was sure as hell gonna find out.
He glanced at Joey, and flinched at the Pharaoh's name and the melodic laughter that followed. He didn't remember Joey ever laughing so sweetly around him. Maybe Joey was just using him to numb some sort of feeling for another like he may have been doing himself. He didn't like the idea of being used. He was used so many times and by people he either despised, trusted, or most hurtful of all, loved. He was evil, yes, but he was also human. He could be hurt just as easily as anyone else. And when that weakness showed and was taken advantage of, it took a large toll on his mental state.
Bakura stared at Joey now, wondering what the blond thought of him. Did he like him at all? Did he only want him there for his kisses and his words? Did he need him? Did he…love him? He asked himself that now. Do I love him? Or do I love Marik? He loved Ryou, but in a different way. He liked Malik, but only as a friend. He guessed he liked Duke for making Ryou so happy, but he hardly knew the guy. It was when he thought of Marik and Joey that everything stopped. The thoughts of Marik would hurt, while the thoughts of Joey were nice yet questionable at the same time.
Damn…it was annoying to be confused.
He sighed, and felt the need to lean against Joey. The warmth the blonde's touch gave him was more than any he had gotten from Marik's. He shifted back fully on the bed and curled himself up into a ball before falling gently against Joey's side. He closed his eyes, so he didn't see Joey's reaction. But he felt it when a strong arm snaked around him, holding him closely and protectively. He forced back a smile, but couldn't hide the look of pure contentment on his face. He heard a chuckle, a 'g'bye', a 'beep', and felt soft lips against his cheek.
"'Kura, what's wrong?" a gentle voice whispered worriedly in his ear. Bakura let out a small groan and put his face in Joey's side as he shrugged lazily. Joey smiled at him, gazing down at the pale yami lovingly. When he had first met Bakura way back when, he had to admit that he was scared shitless. Who wouldn't be? He was a psychopath! But…now as Joey started stroking Bakura's soft white hair, he didn't find any fear of him at all that he had once had. Sometimes he wondered if this Bakura was a fake; he was so much different from the one he used to fear. Or maybe he just changed…almost completely.
Joey kissed his head, for his own comfort as well as Bakura's. This feeling of 'he needs me and I need him' was so…weird. He never really felt that sort of feeling before. With Serenity it was 'I need to protect her because she needs me'; with Mai it was 'I want to protect her even if she doesn't need me'. In both their cases, it was only them who needed him. But with Bakura, it went both ways.
He shook his head gently and closed his eyes, leaning against Bakura just enough where they were both comfortable. He tightened his hold on him to a snugger grip, also pulling him closer to his side. Bakura curled up his legs, forming himself into a tiny ball at Joey's side. His breathing became steady and calm as his head started to tip tiredly. Joey chuckled softly at this and rubbed Bakura's back soothingly.
"You tired, 'Kura?" he whispered into Bakura's ear. Bakura nodded. "You can sleep, y'know. I'll probably just watch you or follow you." Joey told him. Bakura's light blush was hidden and his yawn was muffled. He cuddled closer to Joey, holding on a little to Joey's wrinkly shirt. Joey smiled, kissed Bakura's head, and looked up at the ceiling, sighing a bit.
Can I really be falling for him?
-----------------------------------------------
Ding-dong!
Ryou blinked cutely at the door, his face tilting up from the lowered position that it usually was in when he read. He slid his bookmark in between the pages, closed the inch-and-a-half-thick book and set it gently on the coffee table. He rose to his feet, trotting to the door. When he opened it, he was immediately greeted with a bouquet of roses in his face.
"It's a 'just-cuz-I-love-ya' present." Duke said from behind the blooming red flowers. Ryou blushed and smiled, taking the roses.
"They're beautiful, Duke!" he gasped, staring at them. Duke smiled, leaning down to kiss Ryou's cheek sweetly.
"Not as beautiful as you." he whispered in his ear. Ryou blushed harder, and hustled back to the kitchen to find a vase to put his roses in. He soon did and put the bouquet in once he had filled it with cold water. He touched his nose to one and inhaled, giggling at its heavenly scent. Sensing Duke behind him, he said in awe:
"And they smell wonderful, too!"
Duke chuckled, and put his arms around Ryou's tiny waist, holding him close. "I'm glad you like them. I had them custom-grown just for my little koneko." he told him, nuzzling his face in his hair.
"Duke, you didn't have t—"
"But I wanted to. I want to do anything and everything to make you happy."
"Duke…"
Duke turned Ryou around in his arms and gave him a pure genuine smile. Ryou smiled back and put his arms around Duke, setting his cheek against the black-clad chest.
"Ryou, I love you." Duke whispered.
"I love you too, Duke." Ryou said just as soft. He gave Duke a tight squeeze as he added, "I love you so much." Duke chuckled and rubbed Ryou's back, causing said hikari to smile wider and cuddle closer. A small 'ding', signaling whatever was in the oven was now done, ended the hug. Ryou snatched up his oven mitts and took out the pan inside, setting in on the stove and turning the oven off. A delicious smell drifted in the air, making Duke's mouth start to water.
"What is that?" Duke asked, looking at the pan.
"My mum used to make bread and then put tons of sugar on top for Amane and I. It was our compromise for having sweets during the day." Ryou told him, looking at the bread affectionately. Duke grinned. As he slipped his arms around Ryou's waist he leant down to where his lips were brushing against Ryou's ear.
"I'm sure that you taste even sweeter." he whispered, nipping at Ryou's earlobe. Ryou blushed and bit his lip. Duke trailed his kisses down the side of Ryou's neck, mentally smirking when Ryou leant his head the other way, making his neck easier to kiss. His fingers traced Ryou's sides and when the shirt Ryou was wearing started to become an annoyance to him, he slid his hands beneath it, only running his fingertips up and down his sides. When he came up to chest level, the shirt lifted so far up that Ryou's pale front was then exposed, and that was when the kissing became more…craving, one could say. Ryou was letting out tiny moans of pleasure, leaning as much as he could into Duke's touches and pleading in his mind for more kisses. When Duke's lips hit a certain spot along Ryou's neck/shoulder area, Ryou let out a long moan, blushing as he did so.
He felt a grin on that spot, soon replaced with a warm tongue and hungry lips. To make matters, in this case, better, Duke's fingers found their way to Ryou's chest, grazing teasingly over his hardening nipples. Ryou's little 'happy noises' were slowly becoming louder and bolder than before, and Duke only found it appropriate that he suddenly spin Ryou around and pull him to his chest. They locked lips immediately, their tongues dancing wildly together in a newfound heatedness. Duke tugged Ryou's shirt upwards, breaking the kiss to toss it off. They both went right back at it and Ryou threw his arms around Duke's neck, pulling himself closer. Duke grasped the back of Ryou's head with both hands, deepening the furious kissing. Breath shot quickly in and out of their nostrils, and muffled moans escaped whenever they could. Some time later, Duke scooped Ryou up into his arms and walked to the table just outside the kitchen, his lips still busy with Ryou's.
He set Ryou on the table's surface, sitting him up and leaning forward with his hands on each side of his 'little kitten'. They broke the kiss for Duke's shirt to be yanked off with a sudden aggression by said 'kitten'. Duke and Ryou locked eyes for a moment, panting and blushing.
"Duke…" Ryou huffed. Duke put his mouth to Ryou's collarbone and nipped at it, earning more addicting mewls. Neither knew exactly when both their pants were unzipped, Duke's just barely hanging off his girlishly-curved hips while Ryou's were at his folded up knees. As Duke carelessly swiped away everything from the table to lower Ryou to it, realization seemed to dawn on the vulnerable hikari. "Duke…" he whimpered. Duke stopped attacking his jaw line and looked at Ryou quizzically.
"Yes, Ryou?" he asked. Before Ryou answered, he fingered Duke's long, flowing raven hair, trying to remember when the head band and hair tie had suddenly disappeared.
"Sh-should we be d-doing…this?" he asked timidly, blushing profoundly at his nakedness. Duke blinked at him, and stared at every inch of Ryou's frail body, holding his gaze on a certain...area. His face then grew in redness, and he stared into the wide brown eyes that bore into him.
Face and tone softening, he assured, "Only if you want to…" Ryou squirmed a bit, trying to subtly make his pants come back closer to cover him up. He shook his head, blushing so hard he thought his face went aflame.
"I-I'm not ready…" he stuttered, looking away. Duke forced back a submissive sigh, and put on a comforting smile. They had been dating for a long while now, but now he guessed he had gone a bit too fast for his little Ryou.
"Alright. It was my fault; I came onto you too fast." He apologized, kissing Ryou's nose sweetly. Ryou giggled, leaning back on his hands. At the moment he was still nervous from being so exposed to Duke, but he guessed that Duke being almost equally naked balanced it out.
"It's fine, Duke." Ryou told him, smiling. Duke grinned, and leant down for another kiss. Ryou obliged, murmuring, "I love you" before returning the kiss. It would have been a very tender moment if it hadn't been for a certain interruption…
--------------------------------
"Come pick you up tomorrow at three? 'Kay…yeah…no…you idiot!" Marik spoke into the phone, the last two words coming out harshly. A feminine laughter could be heard from the receiver, but one could tell that it was a male laughing. The laughing stopped and there was a pause in Marik's talking. "Tch.. Well, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye." With that, Marik hung up the phone, and sauntered over to the door, grabbing his keys on the way. He slipped on his shoes and left the house with one goal/destination in mind: Go see Bakura. Now.
Marik had been kept up all night by plaguing, not to mention out-there, thoughts of Bakura making-out with Joey Wheeler. C'mon, why would those two be together? He hardly remembered them even glancing at each other from what he saw. Then again, you didn't see much of that between Duke and Ryou, but they were girly, so in some odd form of logic they didn't count. As he hopped on his motorcycle, revved the engine and took off, his mind drifted over to the taunting dreams from the night before. One had been mainly about Bakura being all-out uke for all-out seme Joey, which was strange because if he ever had a sex dream, he was at least somewhere in it (he actually liked Uke-Bakura, so he didn't find that weird at all).
'You were probably sulking and crying in the corner while that mutt had his way with your lovely, delicious Baka-ra.'
Marik's eye twitched. Damn voices. There were probably more to come, but he was focusing on shutting that one up for now.
It was all due to an unnecessary paranoia from yesterday. That hand holding Joey's could have easily been someone else's.
'But what if it's not? What if Bakura and the mutt are going out?'
-Dot dot dot-
'Exactly.'
From there, Marik just ignored his inner turmoil, paying attention to where he was supposed to park in front of Bakura's/Ryou's apartment building. Doing everything needed to keep his motorcycle in one place while he went to visit the albinism-affected teens, he hummed a made-up tune lowly to take his mind off things. The effect began to wear off as he trotted up the stairs due to a subconscious nervousness of seeing the white-haired yami and reached for the door knob. He instinctively jiggled the knob, shocked to find the door unlocked.
He pushed it open, at first not noticing what was going on in front of him. When he did, he was stunned at the sight.
Ryou's pants/boxers were pretty much falling off his ankles now, his legs split and folded up as he leant back on his hands on the table. His shirt was missing, and a few hickies were around his neck and shoulder area while a few love-bites showed on his pale chest. Duke, also shirtless, was leaning forward, caging Ryou with his hands placed firmly on each side of him. His pants were just about to ease off his hips, but that didn't need to happen to see "Little Duke", as Marik discovered first hand. To make the scene more…un-innocent, both teens were lip-locked, using their tongues visibly after a few seconds. Marik cleared his throat loudly, causing Duke's and Ryou's faces to snap from each other, and the kiss, to Marik.
Normally, Marik would have grinned like a maniac at how horrified the teens seemed, but right now he was not only ridden with love-issues, but random-voices-in-his-head-issues. He cocked (lovely wording, eh?) an eyebrow.
"Did I just walk-in on something?" he asked, surprised at himself that he was without a smirk of any sort. He found people's misfortune entertaining except for when it was his own. And trust me, this would have be waaay entertaining to him.
Ryou stuttered and stammered out his answer as he rushed to make himself decent, face beet red. Duke didn't do a damn thing for a moment due to his lack of shame, but then zipped up his pants when he realized that there was a sudden draft around that area…
"How'd you get in?" Duke asked as if nothing happened. Marik looked at the door lazily, shrugging slightly.
"You didn't lock it." he answered simply and shut it behind him. He was truly expecting Duke to hide from him or go banshee-dice-boy on him, but Duke just ignored him, helping Ryou in any way he could to calm him down. Marik sighed softly. He was, in all truth, envious of Duke and Ryou's relationship. Duke was a kind, caring boyfriend who knew when to back off from his playful teasing while Ryou was just too sweet to Duke, only wanting to make the game-maker happy. At first glance at Duke's lack of shame and Ryou's overall modesty, you wouldn't expect them to be as in love as they were. The sight Marik just saw was proof that you really shouldn't judge a book by its cover, no matter how much you'd read it.
"Hey, so what's up, psycho?" Duke asked, embracing Ryou from behind. He knew that with his arms around Ryou, Ryou felt secure and a secure Ryou was a happy Ryou. Marik sort of glared at Duke, then looked at Ryou.
"Where's Bakura?" he asked. Ryou, still embarrassed, thought for a moment. He was debating whether or not to spill Bakura's little secret…
"Ano…he went out early this morning. He said he was stopping by a friend's house, but not much else." he improvised in a way that he wasn't lying at all. It was true because Bakura only told him he was going to Joey's to check up on him. Marik stared at Ryou for a moment, studying his eyes for any hint of a lie. He knew that Ryou rarely lied, but you never knew...
"He has friends?"
At this Duke burst out laughing, hiding his face in Ryou's shoulder. Ryou bit his lip to keep from chuckling at how blunt Marik sounded. Marik raised his brow, confused.
"Seriously, who else does he know other than us?" he asked. Ryou smiled, patting Duke's head.
"I heard he met someone a couple of days ago." he said, looking Marik in the eye. He didn't fail to notice the flash of hurt and disappointment that captured Marik's features for a second.
"I see…" Marik trailed off, looking to the side. His head hung down lower than his usual 'holier-than-thou' stance, and his back slumped over just a bit. Ryou looked at him sadly and tapped Duke's head to ask him politely to stop laughing. Duke grinned, pecking Ryou's cheek affectionately and resting his head on his shoulder. Ryou giggled, leaning into Duke's hold. He gave Marik a sympathetic look when he noticed how uncharacteristically dejected the yami was.
"Marik…is something wrong?" Ryou asked worriedly. Duke looked at Marik, just then noticing how…off he looked. Marik shook his head stubbornly.
"No. I just need to speak with Bakura." he settled firmly. Ryou sighed.
"I'll give you his cell phone number if you need to talk to him that badly." he offered. Marik's attention snapped up to Ryou, and the couple could tell that deep in his violet eyes, he was probably the most hopeful than he ever was. "Come here, I'll write it down for you." Ryou said, breaking away from Duke to go fetch a pen and paper that, thanks to Duke, was scattered all over the floor. When he got both items, he muttered to Duke, "You're cleaning this up." Duke grinned sheepishly and peered over Ryou's shoulder to see what he was doing.
Marik kicked his shoes off and walked quickly inside, maybe a bit too eager to get Bakura's number. Ryou handed the slip of paper to him, and suggested that he stay for a while. Marik obliged, grateful to Ryou and his Ryou-y ways.
"As long as I don't end up interrupting you two again, that is." he teased with a Cheshire cat grin. Ryou blushed while Duke glared, but overall they ended up laughing at the statement.
