Thanks for all your nice reviews :) Just in case anyone was wondering, every chapter I write goes with a song. Sometimes the song I choose is because I think the title fits, or the lyrics fit, or just the mood of the song in general. It's sort of the same thing that Grey's Anatomy does. Anyways, the artist of this chapter's song is the band Rascal Flatts. If anyone wants to know the artists of the other songs, PM me, they're all really great songs.
Disclaimer: If anyone offered them to me, it's not like I would say no. Oh, and CBS doesn't freaking deserve them!
Chapter 9: This Everyday Love
Later, Scotty and Lilly lay in bed together, enveloped in each others arms. They'd eaten dinner in companionable silence, and exhausted with the emotion of the day, they'd decided to just lie in bed. The melancholy mood of the past few hours was not forgotten, but overcome. They'd both acknowledge each others worries and fears, and somehow they'd come through to the other side, clutching each other and panting, but whole.
"Tell me one thing?" Lilly requested quietly.
"Anything." He smiled. And he realized that at that moment, no matter what she asked, he would've gone to the end of the earth to give her it because like she said, she was here.
She glanced fondly at her new curtains, the blue sequins glittering just a bit in the moonlight peeking through a crack. "Did you do that, just because you felt guilty?"
Scotty considered her for a second. Guilt. That had definitely been a part of it. When she'd confessed to him one of her fears, he'd been both consumed with guilt and riddled with a desire to make it better. He'd adopted that super man routine, abandoned work, and gone to Wal-Mart. But was that it? Deep down Scotty knew it wasn't, because even if he hadn't believed the shooting was his fault, hearing Lilly's fears would still have made him want to fix them.
"Nah." He replied. "I figure that since you're my girl and all…"
"Your girl?" She repeated, eyebrows raised. Her face tinged with both amusement and a bit of nervousness. Was he implying, what she thought he was implying?
"Well, not my girl. That's not what I meant." He hastened to explain, "I mean obviously, you're not mine, mine. You're you, totally independent and…" Scotty stopped, suddenly aware of the deep hole he was digging himself into. He trailed off into silence, listening to the enchanting sound of her laughter. "Be my girlfriend Lilly?"
Girlfriend? That single word carried more weight than anything they'd done so far. Girlfriend meant more than just sex, it meant a commitment, from both of them, and it meant a whole hell of a lot of things that Lilly didn't want to think about. It meant that if they broke up, there would be more pain and if they didn't it would be more wonderful. Lilly also knew that being with Scotty made her feel happier and more secure than she had in a long time. Being with him, lying in his arms at night, was something she wasn't willing to give up.
"Ok." She agreed.
"Ok?" He asked. "Just like that?" He'd expected her to put up a struggle. He'd expected the prospect of labeling what this had become to send her running for the hills. He'd even expected to have to plead his case, all to get her to admit what they'd become. But for her to give in without a fight? That was new. That meant she must be feeling this as much as he was.
"Yeah, Scotty. I mean, we haven't spent a night apart since last Saturday. Your clothes are all over my apartment, and mine all over yours. Tripod and Olivia like you, you changed my curtains, and you made me pizza." Joy flooded her heart as she realized that everything she was saying was true. Scotty had truly become in a presence in her life.
Smiling and pulling her closer, Scotty knew that in that moment he had everything he could want. Reassurance that he hadn't failed his girlfriend, and reassurance that said girlfriend, was willing to be his girlfriend.
Lilly had one more question. "Tell me something else?" She asked.
"Mhmm?" Scotty replied.
"How did you get into my house?" Lilly knew that she kept her doors and windows locked. It was a habit she picked up growing up on the dangerous streets of Kensington, where leaving your house penetrable was practically begging to be robbed.
Scotty was startled. In the emotion of that evening, he'd nearly forgotten the interesting exchange with Lilly's neighbor. "Alex let me in. The mom next door? Said she had your key to go over and check if your cats were fed every once in a while."
"My boyfriend and my neighbor bonding, I don't know how I feel about that." Lilly commented jokingly. Alex was one of her closest friends, well as close as friends could be when someone worked hours like hers.
"She has cute kids." Scotty said, just making light conversation now. "Says you like hangin' out with them." In the back of his mind, he saw Lilly with the adorable little boy barely as high as his knee that he'd met this afternoon. It was truly a beautiful site, and Scotty smiled once more as love flooded his heart.
"4 year old boy and 10 year old girl. Danny and Alice. They think my job is cool and they like playing with the cats." Lilly said, somewhat wistfully. The truth was, being with children at the end of the day took away some of the horrors her job presented her with sometimes. Sometimes being with the most innocent of people could help you convince yourself that all of humanity was like that.
"You ever think about havin' kids Lil?" Scotty asked casually. Then he mentally slapped himself. What was he thinking? Talking about kids with Lilly, who'd just reluctantly admitted to being his girlfriend. That was dangerous territory. Dangerous, cut and run, territory that he did not want to trek into, not tonight at least.
But to his surprise, Lilly simply replied honestly, "No."
Scotty's heart sank. He'd asked, but he hadn't wanted an answer like that. He'd wanted the common female answer, gushing and admitting to wanting a dozen. Scotty knew he shouldn't have expected a normal answer from Lilly Rush of all women, but he couldn't help but hope. Because he did want kids, he wanted a dozen, someday.
So lost was he in his maelstrom of thoughts, that he missed the continuation of Lilly's answer, "I've never thought about it."
Scotty sighed in relief. So there was hope that Lilly would want a normal life. Whether she'd ever want one with him? Well that remained to be seen, but Scotty was so over the moon at her agreeing to be his girlfriend, that he'd already subconsciously started picturing an entire life with her.
He turned around in bed in order to hold her closer to him, he wanted to tell her he loved her. He wanted more than anything than to declare her the love of his life, but he knew that even if deep down she did feel like that, there was no way in hell her brain would know it yet. So instead said, "Me neither."
Scotty ran a hand through Lilly's cornsilk blond hair, splayed beautifully on the pillow. At that moment, his bruised knuckles chose to remind him of their mistreating this afternoon by throbbing painfully. Despite his best efforts, he couldn't help the grimace that crossed his face. He knew Lilly had noticed, she was a detective, one of the best, and she never missed a thing.
"What's wrong?" She asked, the concern evident in her voice.
"Nothin' Lil" Scotty reassured her, leaning in for a kiss. But Lilly would not be distracted. She removed his arms from around her neck. The blue and purple patches stood in stark contrast against his skin. Maybe not so much as it would have on her own pale skin, but Lilly could see them nonetheless.
"Scotty… Did you, beat someone up or something?" Lilly demanded. Her blue eyes pierced his, and he knew he had no choice but to tell her the truth. To what degree he told the truth though, that was certainly up to him.
"Yeah, somethin' like that." The look of concern on her face touched him deeply, but all the same he sought to reassure her. "Don't worry. You should see the other guy." A cocky grin painting his features.
"And who would that other guy be? My wall or my furniture?" She asked.
Damn it. There was no use trying to pull the wool over her eyes. "Your furniture." He admitted sheepishly. Thinking back, Scotty felt ashamed of his outburst of anger that afternoon, even if it was only at her curtains. It was illogical, and incredibly stupid.
In an instant, Lilly knew what had happened that afternoon. She, Vera, and Kat had left before lunch to stake out that drug corner and she hadn't returned until late afternoon. That left over 6 hours for Scotty to simply stand in her house, and stew in his thoughts. Lilly knew firsthand the kind of panic that a simple fear could cause when you're all alone, in a quiet place, without anything to distract you from it. More than once, during the dark months after her shooting, Lilly had wondered if she was going crazy. It was Scotty who had saved her from the abyss. He was the one who burst into her life, whether she wanted it or not, held her to him whether she struggled or not, and hadn't taken no for an answer.
Wishing that she could have been there this afternoon to stop him from hurting himself, Lilly wondered how she could help at this point. Another look in his eyes told her there was no need. They'd already dealt with his problems. When Lilly had enveloped him in a fierce hug of her own, she'd accidentally solved the problem that wasn't even completely tangible. Still though, she wanted to make his hand feel better and she knew exactly how.
Lilly have him a very suggestive look, then slowly, tantalizingly kissed his knuckles, suckling on the tender flesh. If it was hurting him, he wasn't letting on because all of a sudden he his eyes had darkened with want and he was flipping them both around. Mission accomplished. Lilly thought smugly.
The next morning, Scotty woke up long before Lilly. He quickly realized that this gave him the advantage of being able to just watch her, and admire her beauty. He didn't know what he'd done to deserve a second chance at loving someone this much, but he silently thanked the universe for giving it to him.
When Lilly awoke, Scotty was caught between wanting to watch the peaceful look on her face as she slept and wanting to see her smile. As if she could sense his gaze, Lilly's lips turned up in the corners and Scotty realized that the latter was decidedly better. They weren't hurried this morning, in fact they had time to spare. Maybe even time for a shower… together of course.
In a few minutes, Scotty decided that he'd surprise her with some coffee, which he knew always made him happy – when it was made right – and shuffled into her kitchen. Lilly had a plethora of instant brew coffees, Scotty noted, and ironically realized that they probably tasted a hell of a lot better than the sludge they passed off as coffee in the office. So intent was he in picking out a brand of coffee, that Scotty didn't notice Lilly follow him into the kitchen.
She threw his arms around his neck, mumbling about which one to make, obviously still half asleep, but wanting to be near him anyways. Once again Scotty's heart filled with love for the woman clinging onto his neck and he longed to tell her about the depths of his feelings, but once again he held back.
The rest of the morning was something out a fairy tale for both of them. Scotty and Lilly took that shower he wanted, fed her cats, even made toast and eggs together for breakfast, which they found they both had a craving for. As they stepped out into the driveway, Scotty got into his car, and naturally – instinctively in fact – Lilly took her place in the passenger seat. It wasn't until they were halfway to the precinct that Lilly realized the flaw in this plan.
"Crap." She exclaimed suddenly, causing Scotty to jump in his seat, lose his grip on the steering wheel, and nearly cause a ten car pile up in the early morning rush hour. "We're gonna show up together."
It took Scotty a minute to realize what she was afraid of. "Oh Lil, it's okay. I'll just say my car broke down, or your car broke down, or somethin'. I mean we're partners."
Lilly was chewing on her bottom lip, clearly still unconvinced, and Scotty offered another alternative, "Or you could drive, and I could walk the rest of the way."
Taking one look at the falling snow, Lilly knew that she wouldn't force him to walk the ten blocks to headquarters, and that that would probably arouse even more suspicion than them arriving together. "It's okay. I have a better idea." She pointed toward one of their favorite coffee joints, "stop there." She instructed
Twenty minutes later, Scotty and Lilly were walking together into the precinct, arms laden with things to distract their colleagues with. Lilly hoped it would be enough to take the heat off of them for the time being, providing that Scotty didn't…
"Morning everyone!" Scotty yelled exuberantly as he walked into the bullpen. His voice was filled with happiness, and the expression on his face screamed of 'I got laid'
… do exactly that. Lilly cringed. She knew he was trying, trying his damned hardest, to keep this out of the office grapevine, but she also knew that secretive wasn't Scotty's MO, and that that was a risk they had to take. Smiling shakily as Will and Kat looked up from their desks, she suddenly wished they'd brought more than food and coffee.
"We have breakfast." Lilly announced. "Will, your mocha latte."
"Pay you back." He immediately responded, taking the beverage from Lilly gratefully.
"Yeah as if," Scotty said sarcastically, "It's okay, it's on me this mornin'. Your cappuccino with extra whipped cream and cinnamon." He offered to Kat.
"What no spoon?" She complained, but then as Scotty dug around in his paper bag and found one, she had nothing else to say.
"What, no 'thank you Scotty'?" He shot back teasingly, knowing that one upping Kat Miller came very rarely. When she didn't respond, Scotty took her silence as the thing as close to a thank you as possible.
Lilly shook her head and silently handed their boss the black coffee she knew from her days on the line that he enjoyed. In fact, she remembered one occasion especially, where she'd come back from the scene of her triple, grabbed his coffee out of his hand, taken a sip and was startled by its bitterness. But back then Lilly had been too tired and too busy complaining about Vera pawning off his dog calls to her to care.
Just then Vera emerged from the kitchen, clutching his own mug of coffee, undoubtedly from the God awful coffee the department offered. He sputtered in indignation, "Where's mine? You guys are all gettin' coffee on a silver platter from Rush and Valens and I'm stuck drinking this shit?"
"One cup of plain old boring ass coffee for you," Scotty said dryly, clearly indicating his disapproval at Vera's uninteresting coffee preference.
"Thanks man." He said, immediately putting down the other coffee. Then he saw the box of doughnuts they'd brought with them and a wide grin filled his face. "Oh, you guys are awesome." He eagerly enthused.
But upon reaching the doughnut box, he found his path blocked by none other than Kat Miller. The woman might be small, but she was scary, and the look he fixated him with gave him shivers. "What?" He asked.
"Oh, I know you're not thinkin' of takin' one of those beauties before I do." She said. Then without another word, reached into the box and extracted her favorite, chocolate glazed doughnut with plenty of sprinkles, and walked away happily.
Vera looked after her incredulous, "There are a dozen doughnuts, what's it matter who goes first?" He asked, but then as he looked into the box, he realized that damn it, it did indeed matter. Kat had taken his favorite one, not that he wouldn't settle for another, but there was nothing like chocolate infused into dough, fried to perfection, then covered with colorful sprinkles.
The rest of the team rolled their eyes. The fight over the perfect doughnut was a long standing one between Vera and Miller. Jeffries wondered idly why someone didn't just buy a whole damn box of the same one already, it would make things easier, though much less amusing to watch.
The jovial mood in the office lasted for the better part of the next hour. With everyone eating doughnuts, drinking good coffee, and teasing each other good-naturedly, Lilly and Scotty practically forgot their mission had been to take the heat off of them and their hidden relationship. Smiling to herself, Lilly looked over at her boyfriend, who was playfully socking Vera on the shoulder, undoubtedly because of some trivial sports disagreement.
Kat sidled up to Lilly, "So you and Valens came in together, huh?"
Lilly immediately began to defend herself, "My car broke down."
"Right…" Kat said sarcastically, and at that point Lilly knew Kat was suspicious, that for some reason, even though it'd been less than a week, that week had had an effect on how both she and Scotty were acting.
So absorbed was she in her own thoughts that Lilly didn't notice Kat was still talking, "So if I drive over to your house, I won't find your car in the driveway, perfectly okay?"
Crap. "No, it's at the shop," Lilly lied, but apparently she wasn't that good a liar because Kat's next words made her blood run cold.
"You know Lil, your house is only like 10 minutes away, and those doughnuts you bought, that's like at least another half hour of eating." Her devilish smile told Lilly the game was up, Kat was calling her bluff.
Recognizing it was time for damage control, Lilly said, "Not now, Kat. I'll talk to you later, okay?"
Seeing the desperation on Lilly's eyes, Kat agreed, "You know it, Rush."
So this was a pretty cheerful chapter, but unfortunately I have quite a bit of angst planned for this story, starting in the next chapter. I swear I didn't plan it that way, it just, sort of ended up that way. LOL oh well.
