Well here we are and it is December 8. It is getting crazy at work lately because I am trying to get the kids parent gifts together and make sure that they know their music for the program. They look so cute singing the Itsy bitsy spider crawled up the Christmas tree. I stayed 3 hours late at work trying to get the gifts ready but it will be worth it. My dad still needs prayer because he is now in a convalescent home and we are hoping he will be able to come HOME to us soon. He got burned in Mid September and has been hospitalized for more then two months. He is too well for Hospital but still too sick for home. any prayers or warm thought are appreciated. I have teamed up with VampireGirl4EverAndEver, on her story Why are you Back? so if you get a chance please read it. On to the next Chapter I do not own VA but that which is mine I share with you.
Suzanna
Chapter Nine: A Penny for Your Thoughts
Adrian POV
When I first fell asleep I tried to enter into Rose's dreams but Lissa was right, I was too tired. I fell into dreams of my own.
In my dream Rose and I were married. We lived in my home near court. In Rose's arms was a little baby. I watched as she fed the child and played with it. I couldn't shake the feeling that Rose was not truly happy despite the smile on her face. She looked up and saw me watching over her and the child.
"Look sweetie, Daddy's here." The door bell rang as she was standing to greet me. I gave her a kiss on the forehead as she handed me the baby. I gasped as I took in the baby's features. She had chocolate brown eyes but they were not the Dark chocolate of Rose; they were Dimitri's eyes. The baby had the same ears that Dimitri and I share, the Ivashkov ears. Her lips also resembled my brother more than me.
"Adrian, our guests are here, why don't you guys chat as I see about dinner?"
At that moment Tasha came bounding in to the family room holding her hands over her swollen belly. Dimitri followed looking as if he had aged by ten years though I knew it had to have been less than one year. His eyes looked hollow. I set the baby down in her Moses basket.
"Dinner will be ready shortly, would you like some refreshment while we wait?" Tasha rubbed her belly.
"Milk for me and little Dimka." She gushed in a sticky sweet voice. I saw Dimitri shudder at the sound of her voice.
"Give me a tumbler of Russian Vodka." He said.
"But Dimka." She whined. Dimitri sighed.
"Nothing for me brother, thank you."
I went to the kitchen to get the milk for Tasha. Rose was stirring something in a pot while Helen the cook worked on Dinner.
"I'll get the milk; you go back and talk with Dimitri." I kissed her head and went back to our guests. My stomach churned over the guilt that I had for going along with this plan.
Rose came back in the room holding a tray of mugs and a glass of milk. She offered the milk to Tasha. She handed me a mug of coco with a smile but it didn't reach her eyes. She then offered one to Dimitri. He looked up at her and for the first time he smiled.
"Coco just the way you like it Comrade." He took the mug she offered and sipped it appreciatively. He was the first to finish.
"Thank you Roza, you always seem to know what I need most." Tasha stiffened when he complimented Rose but she held her tongue.
"I guess that is what being guarding partners are for. How was Lissa when you ended your shift?"
"She was just finishing her homework while Chris was making her some dinner."
"Dimka we should visit them again." He rolled his eyes
"We have been with them all week. I want to visit with my brother and my guarding partner. Rose gave birth a week ago and we have not seen them since the week before the birth." He sounded tired and frustrated. Just then the baby began to give little squeaks as she moved and stretched. Tasha's eyes lit up.
"Oh can I hold her?"
Rose looked a bit uncertain but she quickly put up her guardian face and gently handed the baby to Tasha. The moment that the baby was in Tasha's arms, she began to cry. Tasha tried bouncing and rocking her; but to no avail. The baby only wailed louder. Dimitri held out his hands toward her and Tasha thrust the baby into them. I heard a small growl from Rose when Tasha roughly handed her baby to Dimitri.
Dimitri gently cradled the baby and brought her close to him. Once in his arms, the baby stopped crying. They looked into each other's eyes for some time. A few minutes later she smiled at him and he gasped. I wanted to know why he gasped but my dream ended.
I lay there in the oblivion of sleep but my mind was working. I had to find a way to fix this. In my dream my brother was absolutely miserable, Rose seemed only a little less miserable, I was pretending that this sham was alright with me while I was boiling on the inside with agony and guilt. The only person in my dream with any joy at all was the crazy Ozera Bitch.
I tried once more to pull Rose into a dream walk but I am still too week. Determined to regain my energy I force myself to stay asleep for a while longer.
~oOo~
Lissa POV.
Chris and I watched Adrian and Rose sleep for a while. We were each lost in our own thoughts. I feel like such a bad friend. It must have been so hard for Rose to keep all this to herself for so long. I thought about the night of the attack. That night Rose and Dimitri bonded I was pulled into her head for the first time.
I felt everything as if I was the one in the cabin that night. I felt Rose's rage over what Jessie did to me, but more importantly I felt how much she loves Dimitri. With all her might she fought with herself. She knew she should not kiss Dimitri because if she did she would need more. She did need more. In her heart she felt as if their souls were finally united and her body needed unity with Dimitri too. I felt the intensity of her love and passion for him.
If Rose feels my emotions as vividly as I did hers I can understand why she gets so upset when she is pulled into my head at intimate moments. What must have made it even worse for her at those times is that she couldn't share her love with Dimitri the way I was able to with Christian. If it is the last thing I ever do I need to try to get that stupid law changed.
I looked over at Christian. He had his head in his hands and he wore a very sad look on his face. His aura was showing me a lot of sadness and anger. I wonder if I should ask him what he is thinking about.
"A penny for your thoughts?"
"Huh" he looked at me.
"A penny for your thoughts, what are you thinking about?"
"Oh , Aunt Tasha, Rose and Dimitri, Adrian. I feel upset for all of them."
"Why do you feel bad for Tasha?"
"She deserves happiness too. You don't know what she gave up for me. Before my parents turned, Tasha had a very good life. She was well respected among royals and she was beginning to be active politically. She was 18 and engaged to another Royal. She was happy.
Up in her attic she keeps all her stuff from her old life. I have gone up there when she didn't know and looked though her old photo albums. One time I found this old antique trunk and on it; in gold letters was `Tasha's Hope chest'. I hadn't ever heard the term before but I looked it up and a hope chest is kind of like a treasure box for girls. It is kind of an old fashioned idea but that was the kind of thing that Tasha liked. They put things in there that they collect for when they get married. She had hand embroidered tea towels, some other nick-knacks. What she had the most of was baby clothes, things she had made herself then embroidered and things she knit or crocheted. She wanted a family with all of her heart.
When I was 8 my mom got real sick. My dad decided that he couldn't live without her so he made the decision to turn. He packed some bags for me and took me to Aunt Tasha's. He told me that he was going to make `mommy better' but that I had to keep it a secret. Before leaving he gave me a note to give to her after dinner. I ended up giving it to her before dinner. When she read it she yelled to Stephan, her guardian, to call the guardian counsel. We needed help.
They came before the Guardians could get there. My mom looked strong again. I tried to run to her, I didn't know why Tasha hid me behind her until my mom tried to attack her. Mom is the one who scarred her face like that. She has other scars on her body too but she is able to hide them. Guardian Stephan staked my mom. I remember that my vision blurred after that, I think it was because of the tears. Just before the doors and windows burst open with Guardians; Dad killed Guardian Stephan and began to attack his own sister. I remember them, the Guardians; they were like an army of death. They pulled my father away from Aunt Tasha and right before my eyes my father was staked."
He looked at me with tears in his eyes. I pulled him into my arms and cried with him. I remember when I woke after the accident. Everything was silent, too silent. I crawled around and found Andre first then Mom and Dad. It was obvious that they were dead. I wanted to hold them but I had to find Rose first. I found her much farther way then the rest of them. It looked like she had tried to drag herself back up the embankment. I knew she was probably trying to get help for us. I remember pulling her up with me and holding her by the side of the road. She was gone but I refused to let myself believe it. I remember holding her and crying. I told her that she couldn't leave me and that I needed her. I remember that I started to feel the most beautiful feelings of love and happiness. It was like my world turned into something filled with gentle music and colors. Then I passed out with Rose in my arms.
I was 15 when I lost my family. I didn't actually watch them die and yet I still had nightmares. I couldn't even imagine what it had been for Christian to have watched his parents attack his aunt or how horrible it had to have been to watch as Guardians staked his parents. Trying to put myself in Tasha's place was also unfathomable to me. We cried together for a little longer then he wiped my eyes then his. He sniffed and blew his nose before steeling himself to continue.
"Like I said before they turned my aunt had a good life. After my parents were gone my aunt had to stay in the hospital for several weeks. She doesn't know that I know this but she was two months pregnant at the time when my parents turned. She lost her baby. I was sent here to the academy even though it was summer because none of my extended family members would have anything to do with me. Tasha's fiancé stayed by her side for a while but when she made it evident that she was going to take guardianship of me his family pressured him into breaking the engagement. Most of her friends turned their backs on her. She lost her standing among the Royals. The counsel never gave her a replacement for Stephen. She lost everything by protecting me."
Christian looked into my eyes and I could see his guilt in them.
"Chris she protected you because she loves you."
"I know but I wish she hadn't lost her baby. I want her to find happiness but I am so hurt with her for stealing that happiness form Rose. Don't tell Rose this but I do think of her as my sister. I think I know why she has her sights on Dimitri."
"Why?"
"The only friend that didn't turn her back was Iriana Zeklos. Dimitri's former charge was Ivan Zeklos, Iriana's younger brother. Even though Ivan and Dimitri were four years younger than Tasha and Iriana they had always gotten along well. Iriana and Ivan and Dimitri became my aunt's lifeline in a way. They were there for her and helped her pick up the pieces and move on with life. Iriana was the one who started her off on self defense and defensive magic. I used to go home during vacations and I remember watching Aunt Tasha and cousin Iriana practice together, water against fire.
I didn't see Ivan or Dimitri too often because Ivan was going to medical school and they were almost done." He cocked his head at me. Then he looked over at Rose and back to me.
Liss I wonder if Rose knows that Dimitri is almost as well trained in medicine as Dr Olendzki. He was Ivan's study partner all though school. Lord Zeklos paid for Dimitri to go to school with Ivan so that he could have an excuse to be in all of Ivan's classes at the Human University they went to. And when Ivan was being taught Moroi/Dhampir Medicine at some exclusive school in Russia, he bribed them to admit Dimitri as a student instead of a guardian.
Tasha said that Lord Zeklos was trying to convince the Moroi counsel to allow Dimitri to get his medical license. He wanted Dimitri and Ivan to work with him in his practice. The Counsel of course said no but Lord Zeklos planed on letting him be an assistant. Any way a few weeks before Ivan was to start his Residency at Lehigh Valley Hospital, he made Dimitri take vacation. That is when Ivan got attacked and died. Ivan's Father asked him to quit being a guardian and come work for him. Dimitri declined saying that it would remind him too much of Ivan.
That was over two years ago. Iriana and gone on to get married and she remained friends with Aunt Tasha but last year she died due to complications in childbirth. Dimitri is the last of the three friends who were there when her life was at its lowest. They had lost contact with each for a while till she met up with him again here at Christmas. He is the only man in our world who has always treated her with dignity.
Thing is he never showed any interest in her or any other woman from what I can tell. He was always focused on being the best guardian and protecting his friend. Watching Rose and you reminds me so much of him and Ivan. His only other interest back then was medicine. Until he brought you and Rose back to the school then he began to change. You don't know what he was like before he brought you guys back. He was very anti social, maybe even worse than me. He never bantered with the other Guardians. He Never smiled. I heard the Guardians talk about him behind his back. He helped in training classes when asked to and they say he is a hell of a teacher but that aside from being a scary ass guardian he didn't seem have any personality. Now he is sociable. He sometimes hangs out with the other guardians. He smiles sometimes when he thinks no one is looking. He is especially in a good mood after Rose's training sessions. Don't get me wrong it isn't like he has turned into a marshmallow or anything but he has changed and so has Rose."
"I saw the changes in her but I just thought that she was growing up. Besides we have been through so much this year that…. Well it is hard not to take life more seriously. I guess looking back on it I should have known. I knew that they had become close friends but I should have known she loved him."
I couldn't help the tears that flowed down my cheek. This whole situation was a mess. Knowing Tasha's story now made me sad for her but I still can't forgive her for what she is doing to Dimitri and Rose. I know that Chris loves his aunt and he also loves Rose so it must be killing him to know that Tasha in her attempt to find happiness has stolen it from Rose. Adrian looks miserable even in his sleep. This is a no win situation because no matter what happens people are going to be hurt.
I paid a lot of attention to Adrian's aura earlier. He does really love Rose, but there is a duality to how he loves her. He has always loved her in a this could be the girl of my dreams kind of way but his love for Dimitri is really strong and I can tell he also loves Rose in the proper way that he should love a sister in law.
Christian pulled me onto his lap and I rested my head against his chest. He was my life line and I couldn't imagine what I would do if we were in Rose's and Dimitri's position. He held me and hummed soothingly to me. I must have fallen asleep I woke up to find myself in a roll away bed. Adrian was kneeling down next to me trying to gently wake me up. I looked around me. I was still in Rose's room. Chris was standing against the wall like a Guardian but looking completely exhausted. I sat up and beckoned Chris to take my place. He shook his head.
"After you guys talk to Rose I will sleep but if you guys get into a meditative state I want to watch over you."
"That is why I love you so much." I stood up and kissed him. "Thank you for getting me on a bed. I guess I really needed the rest too." He kissed the top of my head and nudged me over to Rose's bed where Adrian waited for me.
Ok so I wanted to do a pop quiz on this chapter. please answer the questions and pass your papers to the front by pressing the review button. If you do you will make me very happy.
1, Is Adrian's Dream just a manifestation of his fears or is it a premonition of the future or could it be a little of both?
2. At this point in my story the fact that Dimitri and Adrian are brothers is still a secret. Do you think that they will make it common knowledge?
3. What made Dimitri Gasp when the baby smiled? (hint if you have read my other story you might already know)
4. Now that you know why Tasha is crazy, how do you feel about her?
5. If there is a way for me to give Tasha some happiness of her own in the end would you want that for her too?
I wrote a one shot called What Happened to Rose? please read it and tell me what you think. I did leave it open to more chapters but for now it is a one shot.
Suzanna
