A/N: In my plan, this chapter was meant to have more than just this one scene. But then, it felt so momentous in Alicia's progression that it deserved its own chapter. I also had a lot of fun getting in Laura's head, if only for a few moments. I hope that you will enjoy it anyway, even if it's shorter. I'm sorry for those of you who would want a faster progression. I truly tried to do that but then Alicia ends dragging me back. Maybe tonight's episode will help me in this sense ;)

The first rule of combat was "Be aware of your surroundings". In training camp, she had quickly learned that not paying attention lead to a sure loss and a punishment by the training officer.

"Be thankful I teach you this lesson now. In a war zone, you'd be dead."

He was right, of course. When deployed, a split second might be the difference between life and death.

Rule number two: "Evaluate your opponent". This was a finer skill to acquire. It didn't mean just guess her strength, it meant assess her weaknesses, find the right leverage to knock her down.

The result of combining the two rules with a law degree was an overly-alert person. Every word was catalogued, every movement controlled, every expression decoded.

She had Will Gardner pegged at first sight.

Lawyer with oversized ego, witty, humorous and charming. Handsome playboy and vain to boot. He had a female partner at his law firm which he clearly respected. That ruled him out as a chauvinist. Incredibly ambitious, bitter when he did not get his way but willing to apologize, if he discovered himself in the wrong.

It painted a captivating picture.

After her horrific assault experience, men had been out of the question for a while. She was willing to try again but she wanted someone that could challenge her and at the same time give her a sense of safety. Will seemed precisely the man she was looking for.

She could tell from the beginning that she had him hooked. His look could not mask that he found her attractive and his smile at her witty and fiery repartees revealed that he admired her mind too.

Why, then, did every progress with him seem like pulling teeth?

She had worked at piecing the pieces of the puzzle together and then a clear picture emerged. She wondered how she could have missed it before. Maybe Will had her already under his spell more than she was willing to admit.

She recognized Will's behavior as a defense mechanism, one she had used herself.

Will had been hurt. Greatly. He was still recovering from that blow.

Curious to understand how serious the situation was and who the mighty love of his life might be, she had swiftly dropped into the conversation one of her exes and had propped him to do the same.

He had talked easily about dating a gazillionaire that was still in law school and a sport-journalist who had gone to London to follow the Olympics. He never broke eye-contact, nor seemed ill at ease. These women were not the ones he was pining for.

She had then started thinking about an illicit relationship. He would want to protect the identity of his lover.

When she observed Alicia's look when she called Will, she wanted to slap herself for not figuring it out sooner.

Alicia was the State Attorney's wife. She was in the middle of a political campaign. She had two children and she worked at his firm. She was considered the Saint Wife who stood by her husband even after a horrifying cheating scandal.

She was the ultimate unobtainable woman and Will hungered for her.

That night, at dinner, she tried to poke the bear. She asked about how the case was going, how Alicia was handling the situation.

He had looked down and clammed up immediately before giving her a generic answer.

Bingo!

The rush for having found the solution did not last long. The identity of the woman made things complicated. The best she could wish for was an unrequited love on his part. She was confident she could cure him of that affliction.

People who spent too much time in love alone, under the many layers of fiction and pretenses, wanted to be loved back, to be considered worthy of being someone's first choice. She could do that for Will.

If, instead, Alicia reciprocated those feelings she would have a game of chess to play.

Alicia had fought for her in court, gave her a friendly ear to listen and found her a new job. If there was a thing that she had learned from her attack was that women had to stick together, to protect each other. She abided by that precious rule. She had to give Alicia at least a sincere heads' up on where she wanted the relationship with Will to go.

So, here she was, just the afternoon after the discovery. Will had been in court with Alicia that morning but in the afternoon he was busy with the depositions for another case that would keep him away from the office. They could talk undisturbed.

"Evaluate your opponent!"

Somehow she perceived Alicia to be one of the most formidable adversaries she had ever faced.

She knocked and waited for the combat to begin.


At the knock on her door, she raised her eyes and found the last person she wanted to see. What did she want? Had Will talked to her? Told her about their relationship?

She didn't think so. When the reporter had threatened to destroy Peter's campaign with the story of an affair she had run to Will, afraid that he could, somehow, have been the source of the information. He had looked horrified for a second, then sad and disappointed. How could she imagine that he would do something to jeopardize her future?

She didn't want to commit the same mistake now. She had rejected Will but he still would not divulge private details to a woman he had just started dating.

That left the question unanswered.

She said a distracted "come in" and she hoped that she wanted to talk about a case or something else. Any topic under the sun except Will.

"Alicia, I'm sorry to disturb you. Do you have a moment to talk?"

"Sure, but just a moment. The murder trial I'm working on is particularly important."

"I hope it won't take long. May I sit?"

"Please. So what did you want to talk about?"

They were alone. Cary was helping Will in a deposition outside the office. The glass doors gave a view of the busy bullpen but nobody seemed interested to their conversation.

"Forgive me, Alicia, for being blunt, but there is no reason for small talk. Do you have a relationship with Will?"

There it was. The one question she didn't want to answer. The one question she didn't know how to answer. Was love on both parts enough for a relationship? She needed some time to think.

"What? Where did you get that idea?"

A typical lawyer question. Non-revealing and meant to obtain more information.

"I know you're better than these games. I have seen how you looked when Will came with me yesterday. You seemed as if you had just taken a violent slap."

Laura was a lawyer. She had been a lawyer in the military. She recognized pain. She had believed herself immune to public displays of real emotions, but maybe that held just for Peter. Will was always so different. He had not told her. She had, with that jealousy that wouldn't be tamed. Now she owed Laura an answer.

She could deny everything. Spin a story about how the trial was weighing in on her. Then there was the campaign, the kids...

She could give her the answer practiced for acquaintances and the press. She and Will had flirted with something more than friendship at Georgetown but that was it. Water under the bridge.

She could tell her the truth. She was in love with Will. She wanted him to be happy but she wanted to be the one to make him so. She didn't want Laura to be her wonderful self because Will could truly fall for her and then all would be lost. She was trapped in a web of obligations and circumstances but she threw longing glances at the man Laura was dating. She had started wondering if she could truly go on living a lie, pretending forever without an escape route or a plan B. Did she want to spend the rest of her life as a political wife?

She crossed the "Other" option.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Alicia, you saw us yesterday. We have started dating. I need to know if he already has someone else. Especially if that someone else is a friend of mine."

Or maybe she was issuing a warning that Will was hers now and no office-romance could exist. Friendship be damned!

"Will and I are not sleeping together."

A morsel of truth to keep away other questions.

"Good. I didn't think you were. But that's not a complete answer. Have you slept together in the past?"

She wanted to say "No!". A clear denial would have put Laura off her trial, maybe even ended the conversation.

There was a but. She could report the conversation to Will, maybe falsely laughing about her silly worries and truly investigating his feelings. She would not be there for that scene. She would not be there to see Will's eyes at her magic act of disappearance of their dalliance. Knowing Will, he would never even confront her about it. She could say no and forget about it.

Except that she couldn't forget about it. He could imagine that she had regretted those months spent with him. He could berate himself for even hoping that there could be something serious between them. Will's crushed eyes came to her mind. She had hurt him plenty during her lifetime. One more for quiet living would not change much. She still could not bring herself to tell that one lie, to cause him even the slightest amount of pain. Not after the debilitating experience of the day before.

"There is no need to rehash the past"

When you held something back, a lawyer just dag further. She perceived the mystery and wanted to get to the bottom of it. At least it was her move again. Unless she stopped playing altogether.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to work."

"He's still pining for you. You shouldn't hang on to him. Otherwise, he will never move on."

She was right. Of course she was. Hearing her moral imperative verbalized by someone else made her angry. How much did she have to give to pay her debt with the world? Feelings did not disappear when they were inconvenient or improper. Couldn't she at least grieve in peace?

What did Laura know about them anyway? A few looks, a lot of guesswork. Her banal deductions seemed a violation of the sacredness of the bond that tied her and Will. She wanted to punch back, to knock her down just as she had done with a few sentences. The paralysis power generated by the truth of her words made her pause for a few seconds and that gave Laura the chance to continue.

"You know, Alicia, I really think that we could be great together. I could make him happy. He deserves that."

True, true and true.

Destructive, annihilating, so true.

She couldn't let those be the last words of the conversation.

"Make sure you deserve him."

Where had that come from? Was that a sort of blessing? From Laura's tentative smile she had taken it that way. A close friend looking out for Will's wellness.

It closed the conversation with a neat bow, so she let it go. When Laura had left the office, she allowed herself the luxury to reflect on what she had wanted to say.

She had meant "make sure you deserve him before you claim that you are the one that can make you happy".

She had meant "if you look closely, you'll see that you're not enough for him. Nobody will ever be."

She had meant "make even a minimal mistake and I will take him away from you forever."

She had meant "don't rest on your laurels. If life without him keeps being so unbearable, the past could become present again. Then, gloves will be off and I will use every tool in my box to get Will back."

A/N: In my ideal plan, this is part 1 of the conversation. Alicia didn't use her claws in this one but those will come out in part 2 when the situation will be very different.