Chapter 9: Never Ignore the Classics

When he became consciously aware of the fact that he was dreaming, he squinted into the light. He found it odd that it was so bright when he was in a cave. Then he realized that he was lying down with his arms tied next to his sides, his legs stretched out directly below his waist, all four of his limbs tied to a board below him. "Why am I tied up?"

"No hello, Mr. Fletcher? We're just going to cut right to the chase then? Why shouldn't I just let myself have my fun without even telling you what I plan to do?"

"Because part of your fun is knowing that I know what's going to happen to me."

"Oh, well aren't you a sharp one. Why don't I show you something even sharper?" Something glinted above him, and a pendulum came down slowly, as slowly as possible as one could imagine anything moving. Ferb gasped inwardly when he saw it. The curved edges, sharp and tapered at a point on each end, it was unmistakably familiar. "Ever read The Pit and the Pendulum, Mr. Fletcher? A smart man like you I assume must have read it. While you were doing whatever sort of boring things you always do, I realized that one should never ignore the classics. So behold. Your own version of Edgar Allen Poe's famous short story. Enjoy it while you can."

Ferb stared up at the pendulum, watching it swing for a while as it slowly descended. When he realized how slow it was going and how long it was going to take, he relaxed. Then he heard a rather strange noise coming from his right. Turning his head, he saw the Nightmare had two of his smallest torture devices in his claws.

"We never did get to admire these. All that jabbering, and I never got to show you my toys. How do you like my collection? Does it appeal to your septuagenarian-like mind, Mr. Fletcher?"

"I'm not sure what to say to that." Ferb replied quietly and easily.

"My collection is rather breath-taking. It is easy to be at a loss for words. Am I right, Pear of Anguish?"

"Of course Mr. Nightmare. You're always right. And I agree with you, Mr. Fletcher's mind is stronger than his body. But I think the Lead Sprinkler disagrees with me." The Nightmare was moving the small device up and down, as if it were a puppet.

"I do not!" The Nightmare made the Lead Sprinkler protest, "I remain purely neutral on the subject!"

"Then why did you choose to disarm those traps?" The Nightmare had the Pear of Anguish retort.

The Nightmare was going to have the Lead Sprinkler respond in turn when Ferb interrupted his rather demented puppet show. "You know that isn't the least bit amusing."

"Well, I got bored waiting for that stupid pendulum to saw you in half."

"If you insist on being entertained by that, you could have it move faster." Ferb replied as he struggled with the restraints. "I'm starting to lose circulation in my legs. You know, it won't hurt any if I have no feeling left in my body."

The Nightmare grinned devilishly. "Well, we can't have that, can we?"

"And these ropes are a bit tight. I'm starting to lose circulation in my arms now too."

"Well, if you insist." The Nightmare grinned, and the pendulum dropped about forty feet at once, landing only about two feet from his face. Ferb flinched.

The Nightmare sighed. "I still don't understand why you refuse to scream."

"There is no point in it." Ferb replied evenly.

The Nightmare pointed over to where a large, golden object sat in the corner. "You see that? That's my coffin chamber. You know why I can't use it? Because you won't scream! The only point of it is to hear the screams, because I wouldn't even be able to see you!"

"Screaming is pointless. The only reason I'd consider screaming was if I actually thought someone would save me. This is a nightmare. Everyone knows no one comes for you in nightmares."

"Despite the fact that I can't seem to break you, you will bring me the most delicious food I've ever eaten. Watching you lose your grip on reality will be a pleasure all in itself."

"Wait." Ferb said as the pendulum swung faster, falling what seemed like an inch every second, "I thought you intended to stay here for a while and feed off me."

"Oh, I am. Don't worry your pretty little head about that. But that much pain over such a long time causes anything from mild headaches to full-blown cases of insanity, Mr. Fletcher. It'll be best to just suck you dry and move on. That way you won't have to live out your last days in total cluelessness. You'd lose your charm that way."

Ferb only frowned as the pendulum swung closer.

"Gone all quiet on me now, have you?" The Nightmare paused, as if expecting an answer. "Well, alright then. Prepare to spend your last few minutes without severe agony in silence then."

The Pear of Anguish pipes up, "Ooh, I was right. He is a strong one. But he always breaks when the physical pain comes to play. But you know," The voice becomes a whisper, "we still haven't delved into his memories. I bet if we did that, he'd be terrified."

"Oh, I bet. Then his mind would be even weaker than his body." The Lead Sprinkler chimed in, "We should do it. We should do it while he's gone."

A devious smirk crossed the Nightmare's face, but Ferb didn't see it. He felt it as he watched the pendulum swing lower, lower, lower still.

The pendulum swished in his ears as it grew closer, closer, closer still. "You know what the difference is between yourself and Edgar Allen Poe's story? This time, there's no escape." Ferb bit at the ropes holding him tight. "Ah-ah-ah." The Nightmare chided, "I can't have you escaping." Ferb blinked, and the bridle closed around his mouth. "See, this has more than one purpose. This way, you won't escape. And of course, I get to use one of my toys."

Ferb only blankly stared at the pendulum as it sliced cleanly through the shirt he wore. It hissed back again, and he cringed as he heard it drop even the slightest bit lower, knowing what came next.

The first cut was barely felt, like trimming hair and cutting a bit too close.

The second was like the raking of fine fingernails, sharp, and irritating.

The repetition increased as the blade dropped, and the pain increased excruciatingly with every slice of the blade.

Ferb gritted his teeth as the pain intensified. Before anything too painful occurred, however, he woke up.

He had trouble sitting up when he went to get himself a cup of tea. Before he could sit down with it though, he fell back into unconsciousness.