Author's Note: This is a warning: subject matter in this chapter is a bit more mature than I've written before. I do not go into any detail at all, but just beware.


When Sakura woke that morning, she was quiet. Her thoughts were not the mixture of clouded confusion as she had imagined them to be. In fact, they were surprising clear of any thought one would normally have given to what she had done.

It was not to say she did not feel regret. She did, a little, but that was soon overshadowed by the fact that there was nothing to do about it. What was done was done, and to worry about it would only create weakness. At the moment, there was the feeling of contempt and understanding.

The night before was mainly her doing, Sakura knew. Had it been left to Syaoran, he would have waited for an official royal note and a treaty of peace before he would have given her anything but a soft look or touch. Though it did not start out as mutual, she believed it evolved into something close to mutual during the night.

Sakura could see Syaoran when she turned her head slightly to the side.

He was kinder than she thought. Growing up in a castle had given her access to a particular well of knowledge from a group of people, everyone ranging from the servants to the guards to the cooks. Being a princess, the subject was never approached in her presence, and therefore Sakura had learned to develop light feet for such occasions that required ease dropping.

She never would go out looking for the servants or cooks or guards who loudly bragged to their companions after a night with so-and-so. Were she ever caught doing such, the humiliation alone would send her to her death, never mind the punishment. However, this did not stop her from listening in a fair distance away, unseen and unheard.

Men and women were very different in their acts. Sakura had learned quickly that the ones who did share their stories with others tended to make themselves greater than they were. From their stories, there was no real sense of commitment or affection, and yet there was always the sense of greater understanding, greater pleasure. Those who did have real affection were not as inclined to speak, so Sakura's views were much distorted at the beginning. From the stories she did hear, the men and women never had to ask each other about how something felt, or if it even mattered. They rarely seemed to talk, unless to say something vulgar and tasteless. Men were always a mixture of incredible strength and expertise, while women had to hold on to their sanity.

Syaoran wasn't like anything she had heard. There was no sense of domination in his moves, much less of expertise and strength. There was a hesitance in everything he did, and uncertainty when he actually did them. She was certain that he expected her to slap him and send him away the moment he pushed her down.

He stirred, and Sakura hoped he would not awake.

"Shh, Syaoran-kun" she said, just like she said last night.

His eyes did not open, and he was fully asleep once more.

That was what Sakura had to say last night, among other reassurances. There were moments when he was bold, which Sakura found exhilarating. It was after those moments when she voiced something that he would become more assured of himself.

One thing that Syaoran did which she never heard in the stories was ask her how this felt, how that felt. Was that right? Where his hands calloused? Did she like that? Syaoran questions had the unexpected result of calming her down. He was just like her, just as curious, just as amazed at what they were doing.

Being with Syaoran did cement some emotions within her. She liked him more than she previously thought. She had to; else she would have never pulled him inside her room and kissed him.

There were mistakes on her part. Syaoran was kinder and gentler than all the stories, which Sakura was more grateful for than she could have ever put into words. With what she had done, or not done, she expected him to leave during the night. There were frightening moments where she did not know what to do, at which point Syaoran would say something, and then everything was alright.

Syaoran was awaking up.

She wished he would not. It was nice, just the way they were, with her laying so close to him. It was almost peaceful, and everything else did not have as much importance as right now. Fai, Kurogane, and Mokona did not know anything, and Sakura was glad. The moment was hers, and she wanted to keep it that way.

His eyes opened up. Sakura watched him for his reaction, waiting to see what he would say. She knew him well; he would apologize, for what she couldn't begin to guess. Syaoran estimated his own worth far below than he should. He would worry that she hated him, and that all he did last night meant nothing. Sakura hated this part of him and did not understand it.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, his eyes becoming glassy. "I...I never..."

"Never what?" Sakura asked, watching his eyes. "Never meant this?"

He moved his body a little away from hers. "I have no right, Princess." He was becoming more distant as he continued, "If the king were to-"

"No one knows, Syaoran-kun." She reached out for his arm and pulled him back. "What we did belongs to us."

It was the wrong answer. He jerked his arm out of her grasp. "You belong to your country, Princess. I promised I would bring you back."

It was the part of him that she hated coming out and commanding his words. Though he had more memories than she did, Sakura could not but feel that at the moment she was older than he. Syaoran took things too greatly, and he would mull them over in his mind until he was mad.

The longer she let him move away from her, the more he would back himself into a corner of pity and despair. So Sakura reached for him once more, thinking, 'If this fails, then I do not know him at all', and instead of letting him move away again, she pulled him close and hugged him.

"Shhhh, Syaoran," she whispered in his ear, feeling his chest rise and fall more quickly. "I don't regret last night."

It would take time, Sakura knew, before they would get to a point where they were both comfortable. She would learn from the many mistakes she made the night before, and so hoped that Syaoran would not leave her side like this morning again. It did hurt, and she did not understand why he said such things, but she would learn, perhaps, someday.


Author's Note: This is a one shot reply to my last chapter. I feel that the overall effect of the last chapter was lost in this reply. My writting, I feel, just did not carry over as well as I would have liked. However, what you have in front of you is the fourth attempt. The other three were simply not up to standards, and while their storyline might have been better than this, the overrall character of Sakura worked the best here.

A big thanks to the reviewers of this chapter,and a special thanks Sunder the Gold for challenging me to write a reply to my last chapter. Hopefully this clears things up a bit.