Effie's POV

I don't know what came over me but when I got back to my room I cried.

I wasn't ashamed, I didn't regret anything, I wasn't hurt or angry either.

The sex had been amazing, mind blowing in fact and I'd walked away happily satisfied.

So where the tears came from, I have no idea.

Maybe it was a mixture of the ecstasy I still felt and the exhaustion that had swept over me since drying myself down, keeping balance against that slippery tiled wall had not been easy, I'm not as agile as I used to be anymore.

I don't know.

What I did know was that he would never love me. He would never ever change and he would never ever fight for me. I'm glad I made him promise what he did, I knew him, he was holding back to start off with because it was in his mind I'm sure of it. He was worried that I'd be just like all the others and fall ridiculously head over heels in love with him and give him yet another problem to deal with.

Well I out right refuse to be anybody's problem.

Tonight will stay as it was. A meeting of minds, one friend helping out another.

Friend.

Maybe not.

We'd never been close, Haymitch and I.

Maybe that would make it easier for us both to face each other in the morning and for the rest of our working lives too.

I had to man up. If I let him get to me my career would be over. They'd never let me resign from 12 without a valid reason and I couldn't exactly explain to Snow that I'd fucked my Mentor and now couldn't deal with it like a grown up.

I let out a long sigh and crawled under my covers.

I had a very busy week ahead. Much to focus on, I should be over the moon excited about working for Mr Jacque Winters but it was going to feel so unfamiliar branching out alone, without the grumpy drunk at my side keeping me grounded.

Stop thinking about him Effie!

I looked at my clock and it was very very late. I made a promise with myself that the morning would be as normal, Haymitch and I would become just Haymitch and I again and we would deal with it.

That was morning.

I could still think about him a little longer whilst I slept though, right?