9

~ Alive Again ~

Yesterday I would not have believed

That tomorrow the sun would shine

Then one day you came into my life

I am alive again…

Chicago – Alive Again

When they did arrive home Bae and Gisella were out in the yard with the dogs playing fetch.

Pongo and Major were trotting about the yard, each holding onto one end of the same big stick.

"C'mon...bring it back!"

Both dogs ran over to Gisella and dropped the stick at her feet, wagging their tails.

"Good doggies...now…you wanna get it again?"

Major barked.

"Okay...goooo get it!" She tossed the stick.

As the stick flew through the air and both dogs raced after it, the Cadillac pulled up.

"Bae! They're home!" Gisella cried excitedly.

Bae turned and jogged over to the car. "So . . . how'd it go? You win?"

"Princess?" Archie called for his daughter.

"Daddy! Mommy!" The little girl raced over to her parents, nearly knocking them down.

"How could you doubt it, Bae? Your father won't settle for anything less in a case like this," Belle said.

"I don't," her son laughed and hugged them all.

"Did you have fun with Bae?" Marie asked her daughter.

"Uh huh...an I drew a picture...see?"

She handed them the Enchanted Forest picture she drew. Then she looked up at Rumple. "You told me who my daddy would be."

"Yes, I did. But I wasn't sure if I was right. Now I guess I was, huh?" He picked her up and hugged her. "How would you like to help me make garlic bread?"

"Are you gonna help cook too, Daddy?"

"I certainly am."

She made a face. "Uncle Rumple...you gotta teach Daddy how to make brownies right...I don't wanna eat hockey pucks."

"I'll try, dearie. And chocolate chips too," he grinned. "Shall we have that for dessert?"

"Oh thanks a LOT Sella," her father grumbled.

"Well you do and if you mess em up again I'm throwing them out on the road and yelling "Get Your Roadkill!'"

"I can make chocolate shakes," Bae started laughing. "I remember once I told my mama, Milah, that her biscuits were like rocks," he recalled. "And she told me I was a cheeky brat . . .and spanked my butt. And you had a fit, Papa."

"Daddy doesn't spank me...unless I'm really bad."

"Most of the time a time out sets you straight."

"That worked for him too . . . most of the time," Rumple nodded at his son. "That's why I was angry at Milah. Because that's not something I'd have spanked him for. Kid was being honest. I almost broke my teeth."

"I'm banned from the kitchen except for teatime..." Belle said.

"Surely you can help me do Jello molds without causing chaos!" Maire said to her sister.

"You hope!" Bae snickered.

"Oh come on...how hard is it?"

"What kind of milkshakes do you want?" he asked then. "Vanilla or chocolate?"

"We'll have chocolate ones," said Marie, indicating herself and Archie.

"You may as well make one big one for them...they'll share it anyway and make out." Gisella said.

"Papa will too," Bae said knowingly, then cracked up again.

Archie frowned. "That means a certain little girl was up past her bedtime."

"I had to go to the bathroom! And what did Mommy mean when she said you had a hickey when you got home from the drive in?"

"Well I see a LOT of things run in the family!" Belle giggled.

Bae was holding his sides and leaning against the Cadillac, hysterical.

The couple was blushing.

"Well...they were having a John Wayne movie night and one of them was McLintock...our favorite..."

They both smiled as they remembered that night two days before the trial began…

They'd only been sitting in the car with his arm around her shoulder until after the mud fight scene was over but all that time she was thinking about how much she wanted to kiss him, unaware he was having the same thoughts until his lips were on hers and he'd pulled her onto his lap. Mina advised him in one of their individual counseling sessions that he limit their physical contact with each other for a while so that she didn't feel frightened while advising Marie in a separate session that she not rush back into intimacy with Archie, allow herself time to heal. Marie felt she didn't need space, she needed him.

"Much better," she murmured. "I missed having you hold me close like this…"

"I wanted to give you some space….after what happened."

"I didn't need space…I needed you. I always feel safe in your arms."

"I'm not going to let anything happen to you again, Marie."

"It was my fault. I should've listened to you."

"I should've stayed."

"Rumple was right Archie. Had you stayed, both of us would've been in the hospital or dead. Now Gaston's where he belongs."

"And we're going to keep him there."

And they had thanks to Rumple.

"What's THAT gotta do with a hickey? What's a hickey, Mommy?" Gisella was asking, pulling them both back into the present.

Ohh just a little mark
every couple has to think of a creative way to explain away. And…a little Property of Marie tattoo of my own.

"Okay, Little Miss Curiosity," Rumple said, trying to distract her. "Help me make the bread and the sauce . . before we starve tonight."

"Kay!"

"Now, I need you to get the butter and the loaf of bread, and I'll get the garlic," Rumple told her. "Bae, come in here and get me the cans of tomato puree and crushed tomatoes."

Archie took off his jacket and put an apron on over his shirt. "Do you have any chicken thawed Rumple?"

Marie and Belle stood in the doorway with identical smiles on their lips.

Gisella set the loaf of bread on the counter in front of her uncle along with the butter.

Then she looked over to see her father hitting chicken breasts with a meat mallet. "Why are you beating the chicken up, daddy?"

"Have to...flatten it."

"Now watch me chop the garlic, dearie," Rumple said, and removed a very sharp knife from his butcher block. He began chopping up the peeled garlic bulb in quick strokes, mincing it neatly.

"That's gonna go on the bread like that?"

"It is, once I melt the butter and stir it together. Then you brush it on, along with some parsley, garlic powder and some parmesan cheese," Rumple said.

Archie passed over a bowl of cheese he'd just finished grating. "You need more than that?"

"No, that's good, thanks." Rumple finished chopping up the garlic, then melted the butter in his microwave. "So . . .after you chop up the garlic, you mix it with the butter . . .but you're not allowed to touch my knife, Gisella. Do that and you'll be in serious trouble with me."

"I know Daddy tells me not to either."

"And what else are you not allowed to touch?" her father quizzed.

"The stove."

Bae nodded. "Yeah you don't wanna get burned like I did." He showed her a small scar on his right wrist. "Got that because I didn't listen."

"Ouch! I almost did and Daddy got mad."

"Because that is what happens when you do," Archie said, pointing at Bae's scar.

"I was around your age when I got that," Bae recalled. "I thought I could get tea by myself . . .and instead I spilled boiling water on my wrist because the teapot was too heavy. I never did that again."

"I tried to turn the burner up cause the steak he was cooking was taking too long."

"Bae, you nearly gave me heart failure several times," Rumple sighed.

"And you, Princess almost burned our house down," Archie scolded.

"That was when he had to spank me," Gisella said.

Archie shook his head as he remembered that day. He'd only walked out of the kitchen for a few minutes and turned the burner down but when he walked back in, the kitchen was filled with smoke and his daughter had the door open trying to air the room out.

"What happened?!" he cried then he saw the knob on the burner turned all the way up. He turned it back down and pulled the skillet off the stove. "Gisella Bordreaux Hopper, what did I tell you about not touching my stove?" he asked sharply.

"Ummm…I was hungry."

"You almost burned the house down!"

Marie came into the kitchen. "Oh my God!" she gasped. "Sella, what have you done?"

"I….wanted the food to cook faster."

"And Daddy's told you…time and again you are not allowed to touch the stove. And we've told you what we have to do if you did that."

The little girl's hands covered her bottom.

"Archie sighed. "Princess, I don't like it any better than you do….so don't make me do this again," he pleaded, giving her three swats and one for remembrance then put her in the corner for five minutes.

"Yeah, Papa would have done it to me . . .but my burn hurt worse than any spanking," Bae said, opening the cans of sauce for his father.

"You need any help, Daddy?"

"No, I'm fine Princess." Archie was mixing up his special breading.

"You can help me get the spices," Rumple said. "Do you know your spices, Sella?"

"Show him, Sella," her father said with a smile.

"What'cha need?"

Rumple called out a spice. "Oregano! Parsley! Garlic Powder! Basil!"

Archie watched with pride as his daughter retrieved the items from the spice rack just like he taught her to do.

Bae went and got the sea salt and the crushed red pepper flakes. "Here, Papa."

She set them all down on the counter in the order he called them out.

"Very good!" Rumple said. "How did you know where they were?"

"Cause I get them for Daddy all the time."

"Excellent! Bae, get me a Vidalia onion."

Archie was dipping the chicken breasts into his breading mixture and laying them out in a glass baking dish he'd sprayed. Once that was finished he put them in the oven and shredded more parmesan and mozzarella cheese, setting the oven timer for fifteen minutes.

Gold chopped an onion into small pieces and added it along with two cans of water and the sauce to a large pot. He sprinkled in all the spices he'd gotten from Gisella and the salt and a small bit of red pepper from Bae. "Now . . . I'm going to speed this up a bit with magic . . .so it cooks faster, otherwise this will take hours."

"There's nothing more sexy than a man that can cook," Marie said dreamily.

He set his hands on the pot and concentrated. There was a flicker of purple magic . . . and then Gold set the pot on the stove and turned the burner on to simmer. "An hour and it'll be done."

"You'll need to Rum...these just need to bake with the cheese and then I'll be ready for the sauce."

"Yes, let me boil the water for the pasta," he said, and got another large pot out and filled it with water, salt and a dash of olive oil then set it on the stove also to boil. He set a large strainer in the sink. "Bae, Sella, set the table, please."

"Now remember your settings Sella!" her father called out.

"Ummmm...I'm not allowed to touch knives Bae. Daddy says so."

"Right. Okay, I'll get those," he amended. "You get the cups . . . they're plastic," he indicated the shelf where there were colorful tumblers in different colors.

Fortunately it was low enough for the child to reach.

Bae set the plates down on the table, gently nudging a dog out of the way with his foot. "You wanna fold the napkins?"

"Uh huh!"

She'd been practicing her folding since he taught her how to do it. "This okay?"

"Brilliant!" Bae nodded. "Mama taught me how to do that."

"Daddy was going to teach me till I told him you showed me how."

"It's not hard," her cousin said, setting down the knives.

"He's very good with her," observed the psychiatrist.

"Bae likes kids. Like his father," Belle said.

"I never thought...back in our world and to some extent here...I'd ever have a chance to be a father..."

"And how do you like it?" asked Rumple curiously.

"I wouldn't trade it for anything even being a cricket again. It was a lonely life."

Rumple nodded. "Family is the best thing."

"Marie...Belle...ummmm would you mind going into the dining room for a bit... I need to talk to Rum..."

Marie smirked. "Man talk?"

"Something like that."

Rumple looked at him inquiringly after the two sisters had left the kitchen.

"I've been wracking my brains trying to figure out when and how to ask Marie to marry me and that I want to adopt Sella but when I try to do it...I lose my nerve."

"Ah. I know how that feels. It took Maurice's harvest ball to get me to do it. Actually . . . it took Belle almost dying by Zelena's hand to even get me to admit I loved her."

"Oh I already know I love her...but I don't want to rush her into commitment...especially after..."

"Then perhaps you just need to wait for the right moment," the other suggested. "You'll know when the time is right."

"And it's so hard being in the same house...her room not far away..."

Rumple nodded. "I know. For us it was even worse . . .some of the furniture in my castle was enchanted by my predecessor . . . and they talked about everything!"

"The only gossip I have to deal with is from the busybodies in this town who think I need my own therapist for getting involved with her."

"They'll hush once they start thinking about something else."

"I just don't want her dragged through the mud any more than she was during the trial."

"Then you need to practice your meditation, Hopper," Rumple smirked. "Or ask her soon."

"I feel like I'm back to being the son of my thieving gypsy parents...can't do anything on my own...have to be told..."

"But you're not. Just like I'm not the village spinner coward. And with the results of this trial . . . i think opinions in this town will change pretty quickly towards her."

"I hope so. She needs that."

"The one good thing that dirty dog Spencer did was show Marie as the innocent victim in this whole thing with Gaston. And now people will stop thinking of her as a loose woman."

"One thing that bothered me is people accusing her of trying to change me because I'm dressing differently, don't wear my glasses that often and go to self-defense classes."

"They've said the same thing about me," Rumple said. "They claimed Belle had me whipped. What they don't understand is that nothing can MAKE you change-it has to come from in here," he tapped his heart. "You have to WANT it. And I did. I changed back to the man I was before the Dark One. Which was a man who loved a woman and wanted to be the best he could be . . .for her, for Bae, and for me."

"Before the curse broke...I started getting tired of being on Regina's leash over Henry..."

"I can see how you would be. The Mills women . . . are very demanding . . ." Rumple said wryly."In fact, they can be downright bitchy," the pawnbroker remarked.

"And then…that night when the dwarves dragged me off to the Foxtrot and I saw her...I thought I was seeing Aphrodite herself but I'm no Adonis."

"To her you are. Like Belle, she sees your heart, not what's on the outside. For so long I was convinced I was a monster that no one could love, I was hideous and ugly. But Belle . . . she saw my heart . . . and she made me see that despite my scales and claws, I was still beautiful to her."

Archie looked over at Gisella's drawing that he hung on the refrigerator to look at while he cooked.

"Did you really See me being her father?"

"I did. But my Sight is not always reliable . . . meaning sometimes things don't happen as I See them . . . or they happen differently or not at all. Visions don't always mean what you think they do. Seeing is an imprecise art."

"But in this case it was..."

"Yes. But I still wasn't sure . . . and then a few months later the Dark Curse was cast . . ."

"Most of that time is a blur for me."

"As it is for me."

"The only bright spots in it were being with Henry...and seeing Gisella in the park before I met her mother."

"Mine was finding Bae in my shop trying to rob me . . .and discovering Belle was Bae's reading teacher."

"He's come a long way from the smart ass you brought to my office. He lifted a few things while he was there too."

"Oh gods! What were they?"

"A paperweight and a pen set."

"I'll get him to give them back."

Archie chuckled. "I bought them back from your shop." He grinned. "And I added it to your bill."

"That kid! I could throttle Regina sometimes for doing what she did. He was a scamp before, but not dishonest. But I'm working hard to remind him of the way he used to be."

"Be glad you got him out before that fight...I'm still treating some of those kids."

"I can imagine. The gods were kind to me, Archie. I could have lost him."

The timer to the oven went off.

"But you didn't," he said, putting on his oven mitts

Rumple stirred his sauce and then put the pasta in the water. "No. And I got Belle back too."

"That sauce ready enough for me to top these?"

"Yes. Go ahead." Rumple handed him the ladle.

He carefully ladled sauce on each chicken breast and added mozzarella and parmesan cheese, putting the dish back in the oven and setting the timer for ten more minutes.

"I still can't believe it's finally over…that I'm free," Marie was saying to Belle in the living room. Belle reached across the sofa and took Marie's hand in hers.

"Believe it. And now you can start a new life with a wonderful man. I couldn't have asked for anyone better to be with you than Archie. I just wish you two would've met back in our land without him being a cricket."

"About that….Belle, this may sound strange but I've been having dreams…and have seen…visions if you will of meeting him while he was a cricket and I'm not trying to kill him with the broom in them."

"That is strange because you hate insects."

"I know. Belle, what if we did meet back in our world and we can't remember it because of the curse?"

"The Dark Curse or the Curse of the Broken Hearted?"

"Does it matter? My point is….I was drawn to him from the moment we met in the Foxtrot and I don't know why. He wasn't the kind of man my cursed self looked at before. And now I remember we used to talk on the phone a lot when he called in to Doctor Doolittle's office to set up appointments for Pongo or have him seen after he got into something and I loved the sound of his voice. He even said he preferred talking to me more than anyone else."

"That's better than Rumple and me. He used to call me his least favorite pain in the ass, remember? Even if you did meet before and don't remember it, the important thing is that you're together now and you love each other. Hopefully soon you'll be making good on that promise to let me be in your wedding."

"He hasn't asked me yet and probably by that time you'll want to be sitting rather than standing."

"So? You owe me, sis."

"I know…and I'm sorry Belle. If it's any consolation Archie wasn't happy with me over that either."

"Good! Let's go see if those boys of ours will let us back into their domain. Is it safe to come in yet?" Belle called out as she poked her head into the kitchen.

"Yes. We're done telling each other our deep dark secrets," Rumple chuckled.

By the time the chicken was done, so was the penne and Rumple ladled sauce over it and set it on the table. The garlic bread was done also and he sliced it and put it on a plate. "Dinner!" he called to the children in the den.

Gisella ran into the room until she was given a stern Look from her parents.

"Everything looks delicious," Belle said.

"Oh it will be," Marie murmured.

Bae poured drinks for everyone, then fed Major and Pongo so they wouldn't beg at the table. Afterwards he sat down next to Gisella and said, "Looks great, guys! Now can I eat? I'm fading away."

"Nuh uh...if you was I'd see your bones."

Bae tweaked her nose. "Smartypants. Want me to cut up your chicken?"

"Sure!"

Bae did so, then took two pieces himself and a rather large serving of pasta and two slices of garlic bread. Lately he was always starving.

"Where are you planning on putting all of that? We're the ones supposed to have an appetite?' Belle teased.

"Don't worry, I'll eat it all," her son assured her. "I don't waste food."

"Growth spurt," Rumple said sagely.

"Oh that...the joys and pains of it." Archie grimaced.

"I never had much of one," Rumple remarked. "Was starved too much as a little boy thanks to my rotten papa."

"I had to work off mine picking pockets...not that I enjoyed it."

"Daddy! That's bad!" Gisella scolded.

Bae flushed. "He's not the only one. When I was a Scorpion . . . I could steal the fillings outta your teeth and the shirt off your back and you wouldn't know till you felt the wind blow."

"Like a pen set and a paperweight?" Archie joked.

Bae went red. "Umm . . yeah." He gave the therapist a guilty apologetic look.

"We're not all perfect, Gisella, we make mistakes in life but we learn from them and teach others not to repeat them...so you remember what we teach you," Marie said.

"And no matter what, your family forgives you for making them," Rumple stressed.

"You still should be in time out," the little girl said.

"Sella eat."

Bae smirked. Then he began to eat eagerly.

"This chicken is excellent," Rumple said, eating his piece.

"Thank you Rumple."

"I told you Belle...your husband has competition," Marie bragged.

"In the same family it's not completion, dearie. It's cooperation," the sorcerer laughed, as he ate his penne.

"Besides...I'll make him a deal...if he wants my breading recipe he has to improve my baking skills so my daughter stops declaring my efforts roadkill."

"You have a deal, Archie. You watch me make my brownies after dinner," Rumple agreed. Then he lifted a glass in a toast. "To our family . . .and victory over that scumbag Gaston and Spencer."

The others lifted their own glasses in salute.

"Is the bad man gonna be someone's prison bitch?" asked Gisella.

Archie spit out his milkshake. "Gisella!"

Bae almost choked on his garlic bread.

Marie scowled. "Someone has an appointment with Dove soap after dinner."

Rumple shook his head. "Dearie, where did you hear that?"

"Eti the Yeti...he said Mommy was gonna be one."

"That miserable b-" Bae began.

"Baelfire!" Rumple snapped. "You want to taste Ivory instead of brownies, mister?"

"No sir," his son said, bowing his head.

"Daddy I don't wanna taste soap."

"You heard your mother...after dinner."

"Awww!" she groaned.

"Do you want time out with that?"

"No. Sorry." she sniffled.

Bae shot his cousin a commiserating look. Sometimes it sucked being a kid . . . but he wouldn't trade his family for anything.

Belle and Marie took the kids into the living room to watch TV while Rumple conducted baking lessons with Archie in the kitchen after dinner.

When they were finished Archie brought his brownies out to his harshest critic to try.

"She's going to toss them right out on the road...I know it…"

Gisella bit into one . . .and chewed slowly. Then she looked at her daddy. "They're good!"

"Oh thank the gods!" He breathed a sigh of relief.

Rumple laughed. "I've never known anyone yet who's turned up their nose at my brownies."

And they all agreed.

"Come on Sella, it's time to do your schoolwork," Archie said to his daughter the following afternoon. She'd been out of school since her mother's attack but Marie, Belle and Snow were helping her keep up her studies and when none of them were around Archie went over her work with her.

"I wanna watch Barney!" she complained.

"You can watch Barney after you do your homework."

"Wanna watch it now!" she pouted, stomping her foot.

"Gisella, if I have to count to three you're going in the corner," Archie threatened.

"Not doing it!"

"One!"

She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him.

"All right…two!"

She held her ground.

"Three! That's it. Corner…five minutes. Go!" he ordered.

"No!"

He picked her up and placed her in the corner facing the wall. "You're not going to be a brat today. Five minutes young lady and if you throw another tantrum you're not going to be watching Barney or anything for a week."

She came out of the corner five minutes later, her head bowed in shame. "M'sorry Daddy."

He hugged her. "It's all right, Princess. Come on. Let's get your school work done."

After she finished her schoolwork he went into the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea and her a grilled cheese sandwich to snack on while she watched Barney. He stepped out of the kitchen for a few minutes to use the bathroom unaware that Zelena had been hiding in basement, able to get past the ward on the house by using a charm she'd stolen out of Regina's vault and the ingredients for the potion she dumped into the pot of tea sitting on the counter. Gaston couldn't get to them from prison but she could. She tried to find something in the vault to help her break Gaston out of prison but no such luck. As soon as she heard him return to the kitchen she ran out of the house and down the street.

Archie put his cup of tea and the sandwich on a tray and carried it into the living room. Gisella was sitting on the floor watching Barney.

"Ooh you made the pizza one. Thanks Daddy!" she cried and hugged him.

"You're welcome Princess."

"Gotta go to the bathroom. Pongo, you stay away from my sandwich, kay?" she instructed the Dalmatian as she walked out into the hall. He snorted and rested his head on his paws.

Archie chuckled and took a sip of his tea, feeling sharp pains in his stomach. He fell over onto the coffee table and the cup dropped to the floor. The room seemed to enlarge before his eyes. When he looked down he discovered to his horror that he now had the body of a cricket.

"No! No, no no!" he cried. "This can't be happening! Not now!"

What did you do? he heard Pongo ask in his head.

"I didn't do anything! Pongo, I can't be like this again! I just can't!"

Calm down. We need to get hold of Rumple and see if he can change you back.

"Calm down? You're telling me to CALM DOWN when I'm a goddam cricket again! I'd rather DIE than live like this!" he screamed.

Well sitting there having a fit isn't going to help things!

"Pongo, I can't lose my family…" he sobbed.

I'm gonna go get Gisella and have her call Rumple…or someone.

The Dalmatian raced down the hall to the bathroom and nearly knocked the child down. "Pongo, what's wrong?" she asked. When she walked into the living room she saw everything on the coffee table scattered all over the floor including her father's teacup. "Daddy!" she cried. She ran over to the cordless phone and dialed 911.

"Somebody took my daddy!" she screamed and explained what happened to the dispatcher. After she spoke to the operator she called her mother in tears.

"What do you mean Daddy's missing?" cried Marie.

"Somebody took him, Mommy," she wailed.

"I'm on my way sweetie."

"What's wrong, Marie?" Mina asked her.

"S…Someone's….taken Archie!" she cried. "C…Call my sister…and Rumple….I…I need to find him!"

Mina calmed Marie down and had Jack call Belle and Rumple for her. They picked her up at the office and Belle sat in the backseat comforting her.

"It was Gaston…I know it…he had something to do with this…he'll never leave us alone…" Marie wept. "What if they had him…oh God Belle…"

"We'll find him, Marie," Rumple vowed. "And if Devereaux had something to do with this, he'd better start writing his will!"

Back at the house Gisella sat down on the sofa to wait for her mother. She grabbed the broom from the kitchen closet, ready to beat up the people who took her daddy if they came for her. Archie flew onto the sofa beside her.

"EEEEEWWWW A BUG! GIT OUTTA HERE!" she screamed, swinging at Archie with the broom. He jumped off the sofa.

"Gisella...it's me...aaah dammit what the hell IS IT with these Bordreaux women and brooms!" he cried, taking flight, an image of Marie chasing him with a broom in Rumple's castle back in their land flashing before his eyes. How was that possible? He didn't meet her when he was a cricket...or at least he didn't think he did yet he kept having visions of the two of them.

"Gross! I hate bugs! Go 'way!" She kept swinging while Archie dodged her blows by flying in the opposite direction.

"Sella, it's Daddy!" Archie yelled as loud as he could in his small voice only she couldn't hear him. She raced after him, swinging the broom like a professional baseball player, barely missing him a few times. "Sella….!" he cried when the broom caught one of his wings and sent him crashing onto the coffee table. "I cannot believe this…I'm going to be killed by my own daughter!"

"You git!" she yelled.

Marie, Rumple and Belle ran into the house a few minutes later along with Emma. When they saw the cricket in the room there was no doubt in their minds it was Archie but they couldn't understand how or why he was a cricket again.

"Gisella, stop that's your father!" Belle cried just as the upset child was about to smack him with the broom. Marie quickly snatched it away. Archie breathed a sigh of relief.

"What? But...but he's a bug!" she wailed.

"I know sweetie, I know..." Rumple said softly.

"Uncle Rumple, fix him!" The little girl sat down and burst into tears. "I don't wanna bug! I WANT MY DADDY!"

At that moment Marie wanted to commit murder. She had no idea who could have done something so horrible but when she found out, that person was going to regret the day they were born!

Rumple concentrated, trying every spell he could think of to change Archie back but nothing was working and he was draining himself. He collapsed on the sofa exhausted. "Powerful...spell..." he murmured.

"There's nothing you can do?" Marie asked through her tears.

"I...I'm sorry...Marie...unless I know what they used..."

"I want my Daddy!" Gisella bawled.

Archie hopped onto her shoulder. "If I knew how to change back I would, Princess."

"M'sorry I tried to hit you..."

"It's okay, you didn't know."

"Why're you a bug?"

"I was one before we came here, honey."

"Why?"

"It's a long story but I'll tell you sometime…I promise."

The little girl glanced at the cricket on her shoulder then back to her mother. "Mommy...KISS HIM!" she cried.

"What?"

"What if it's like the Princess and the Frog movie an you gotta kiss him to change him back?"

"It just might work!" Belle exclaimed. "True love's kiss!"

"W...Worth a try…" Rumple said sleepily.

"But how? He's...and I'm..." She spread her hands helplessly.

"Believe Marie," Belle begged her sister.

Archie jumped from Gisella's shoulder over to the arm of the sofa, wanting Belle and Gisella to be right and Marie's kiss would be all that was needed to break the spell. And there was something he wanted to do for quite a while once he changed back. Marie kneeled down so that her face was close to his head...good gods but it was so tiny and pressed her lips to it thinking about how much she loved him and how much Gisella loved him. A cloud of green smoke surrounded them and once it cleared Archie was back to his human self again, his arms around Marie as they kissed and so many memories came rushing back to both of them.

"…Rise and shine, my lady! It's another beautiful day…" Jiminy whispered in Marie's ear as he flew above her. She groaned and buried her face deeper into her pillow. "Come on, Marie! Today's not a day for sleeping in. It's a day to be out in the fresh air and sun."

"Oh, all right," she mumbled and sat up. "Do you always get up this early?"

"Always."

"Well you can't stay in here while I get dressed! Now shoo…out in the hall with you!" she cried and waved him away.

"What kind of cricket do you take me for? I don't peek in at women while they're dressing. It's indecent!" He shook his head and flew out into the hall, using one of the statues as his perch while he waited for her.

Belle came down the hall sweeping the floor and stopped when she saw him. "Good morning Jiminy," she greeted. "What are you doing out here?"

"Marie is dressing and a bit cross with me since I woke her up early."

Belle giggled. "I forgot to warn you about that. She doesn't like to get up any earlier than eight."

"All right, come on you crazy insect. You've gotten me up, now what do you want to do?" Marie asked when she came out of the room. The worst of her illness was over but Rumple advised her that if she did go outside, she was not to be out there long or she risked another relapse as she had the day Charming showed up and she and Belle chased him out of the castle with the broom.

"Are you going to be cross with me all morning?" he demanded. "It doesn't become you."

Truth be told, she didn't like staying angry with him now. She spent most of the week in bed sick, miserable and missing her daughter terribly but he was always finding ways to bring a smile to her face with his stories about the Charmings and little adventures he had with his friend Geppetto.

She patted her shoulder and he flew onto it then she took him out to the gardens, loving the scent of the red roses that bloomed there. Jiminy flew off her shoulder and down to the roses and took one off the vine by biting into it. It fell on the bench beside her.

"Jiminy….that's so sweet of you…thank you," she said softly as she picked it up and sniffed it.

"Now that's the smile I was looking for."

She laughed. "You won't let me be unhappy for a moment, will you?"

"No."

"Why?"

Because you're even more beautiful when you smile and if I were human again I'd bring you a dozen roses every day just so I could see you smile.

"You deserve to be happy, Marie…that's all," he said shyly.

But you're not human and you can't be, not right now. It's too dangerous. Any day now Cora will cast her curse and take you all away…and the only way you can protect yourself and her is to stay as you are and try not to get too close.

They had to try to get into Cora's vault one more time. Too much was at stake now to let the curse be cast and once again he was willing to die to stop it if that was what it took. She was worth dying for.

"I have my daughter, my family and a few friends….what more do I need?"

You need a man who will love you more than anything else in the world. I can be that for you. I want to be that for you! And I know I'll love your daughter too if I get to meet her!

"You don't think you need anything else? What about love?"

"Love's for everyone else…not me," she said sadly. "I thought I was in love once…but he died."

"You can love again. You just have to believe in it, in yourself."

And in me.

"No, Jiminy…love's not for me. It never will be."

"What if someone proved to you it would be? Would you take the chance?"

"Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I think that's what is missing in your life…a man to love you…and a father for your daughter."

Now why can't a MAN treat me like this? Marie thought bitterly. She despised insects yet this one acted like he was still a human being and if he were one she could even fall in love with him. Could it be possible HE was the man she would meet in the new land? No, it was too much to hope for.

"Well I won't find him here…if I ever will so there's no sense thinking about it!" she cried.

His face fell. "What do you mean?"

"Rumple….he said in another land I would find a man who would love me and Gisella….but it's too much to hope for," she sobbed.

"Will you excuse me for a moment?" Jiminy asked and took flight. He flew into the open window of Rumple's lab and perched himself on the table, glaring at the sorcerer. "What kind of game are you playing, Rumplestiltskin?" he demanded angrily.

"Whatever do you mean dearie?"

"You know exactly what I mean! Are you enjoying this…watching me get my heart broken and dashing Marie's hopes when I've never felt this way before in my life and she's been so disappointed by love?"

"Jiminy, what has you so upset?"

"Did you or did you not tell Marie she would meet her true love in another land?"

"It's what I've Seen Jiminy." He set a Seeing Globe on the table and concentrated, letting his vision appear in it. "That man is Marie's true love. Recognize him, dearie?"

Jiminy peered into the globe feeling as if a weight had been lifted off his chest. "It's me…." he whispered. "I'm…older than I was before I was changed…but it's me!"

"I had no doubt of it, cricket. But the course of true love never does run smooth…and there will be many challenges you'll face in this new land."

"I don't care. I'd walk through fire for her if I had to!"

"It may not come to that but I See good times and bad ones ahead for you. You'll have to fight hard for your happy ending…maybe the hardest of all of us because of your interference in Cora's curse."

"I don't care. She's worth it to me," Jiminy insisted.

Rumple smiled. "So…if Fate is kind, someday we'll be family."

"I'd like that. If you'll excuse me, I'll go see if Marie is all right."

"Go on. Cherish what time you have. It will not be long now…"

"…Weren't you going to say goodbye?"

"Not goodbye, fair lady. But . .. until we meet again. Because someday . . . I think we will."

"You've been a wonderful friend to me, Jiminy..."

"You too, Marie . . ."

She gave him a smile and stepped into the waiting coach.

"…You've loved me...all this time...you've loved me..." Marie sobbed. "Oh, Archie..."

"I always have, my lady...and I always will," Archie Hopper, formerly Jiminy Cricket murmured and kissed her again.

She smiled. "I like you better this way..."

"At least now I don't have to worry about you trying to kill me with a broom or kicking me off the furniture, calling me a daft insect."

"Or you poking me with your umbrella…"

"Daddy!" Gisella cried and ran over to them.

"D...Did it work, Belle?" Rumple asked from the chair where he was taking a nap to recover his strength.

"Of course it worked," she declared happily.

Archie held Marie and Gisella to him protectively, never wanting to let them go again. "I love both of you more than anything else in the world," he murmured. Then he released them and got down on one knee in front of Marie, taking her hand in his. "Marie Bordreaux...will you marry me?"

If you say no sister of mine, your ass is grass, Belle thought.

Marie didn't hesitate a second. "Yes, I'll marry you!"

"Mommy...that mean he's gonna really be my daddy now?"

"Yes it does, princess. I'm always going to be your daddy." He hugged them again.

"Belle...I miss something? Why are you crying?" Rumple asked, opening one eye.

"Wake up Rumple. You've just gained a brother-in-law."

"Bout damned time," he muttered.

"Excuse me?" Archie frowned at the sorcerer. "I didn't wait as long as YOU did to pop the question!"

"Extenuating circumstances."

"My ass!"

"Uh oh...Daddy...you said a bad word now Mommy's gonna have to get the Dove out!"

"I think I'll let him off with a warning this time..." Marie said softly.

"Well…thank God you're back to normal," Emma said. "But how the hell did it happen, Hopper?"

"I don't know...I was sitting here drinking my tea and..."

"Let me see the cup!" Rumple said, getting up from the chair and gazing down into the empty cup, the powder inside it a bit familiar. He didn't have this particular concoction around but he knew who did.

"Regina," he hissed.

"Regina? Why would she hurt Archie? It doesn't make sense." Marie argued. "It was Zelena…it had to be. She's the only person besides who would do this to hurt both of us."

"Henry said Regina's been having memory lapses which makes me think she may have reverted back to HER cursed self," Rumple informed them.

"Zelena has more of a motive right now Rumple. We ran Spencer out of town on a rail and Gaston is in prison. She's been seeing both of them…she had to have been," Marie argued.

While they were debating the issue Emma got a call from the Mayor herself reporting a break in at her vault along with what was stolen. The vault was sealed with a blood lock and since Emma knew the mayor had been at a meeting Marie's accusation against Zelena was valid.

"Marie, it was Zelena. Regina just confirmed it. She stole the potion and what she needed for it out of the vault."

"When I get through with her, she'll wish SHE was a bug!" Marie growled.

"Looks like it's time for another ass whipping, dearie," Rumple said to Belle.

"Ohhh wee ohhh burnnnnn the witch," Gisella sang. "Can I roast marshmallows?"

"Gisella!" Archie cried.

"Daddy, she turned you into a BUG. Aren't you mad?"

"Yes but burning her is a bit...extreme..." He glanced over at Rumple then smirked. "Maybe she should be turned into something that won't harm anyone."

"Oooh make her a BUG so's we can squish her!" Gisella cried and rubbed her hands together gleefully.

Rumple laughed evilly. "Not a bug...but I have just the thing."

It would probably drain him a bit more but it was worth it.

"Archie, help me up. We're going to pay that tramp a visit and have a little...chat with her."

"Don't wear out your arm, Rumple!" Belle called after him as she followed him out to the car.

Jefferson had Zelena waiting for them in a cell at the Sheriff's station. The former witch glared when she saw Rumple, Archie, Marie, Belle and Gisella standing outside her cell.

"Haven't learned your lesson, have you, dearie?" Rumple sneered at her through the bars.

"What are you going to do? Kill me?"

"Oughta squish you like a bug you witch. You hurt my daddy!" yelled Gisella. "Lemme at 'er!"

Marie picked up her daughter and held onto her. Gisella could put quite a hurting on someone when she was angry.

"No, I'm not going to kill you. I'm just going to make damned sure you NEVER hurt another member of my family again."

He waved his hand and in the spot where Zelena stood was...a green goat.

Belle clutched the wall with one hand and her belly with the other as she laughed hysterically.

"Oh...my God…Bae is going to PEE himself when he sees this!"

"I don't get it," Archie said to his fiancée who was laughing so hard herself she had tears in her eyes.

"Remind me...to...tell you...when we get back to the house…"

"Ha ha...HA! You're an ugly green goat, witchie poo!" Gisella taunted.

"Oh my God...Rumple that has got to be the best gag I've ever seen," Emma giggled.

"It was long overdue," he mumbled, glaring at the goat. "Now run along dearie." He flicked his wrist and opened the cell. The goat attempted to bite his suit…and him...and quickly lost its teeth in the process.

Gisella clapped her hands. "Good one Uncle Rumple. Now she hasta wear dentures!"

"They don't make them for goats dearie."

"Now I really want to hear this story!" Archie chuckled.

"Can we go home now, Daddy?" Gisella asked him.

"Yes, we can go home."

Archie walked out of the police station with his head held high and his arm around his fiancée's shoulder while she held their daughter in her arms.

While behind them in the station, a very obnoxious and angry witch-goat raced around butting her head into the desk and the walls, bleating. Emma stared in consternation. "Uh, Rumple? I think she's possessed."

Rumple looked back at green goat. "No, dearie. She's having a tantrum." He sighed. "If she gets too out of line-just whack her with this," and he conjured up a shepherd's crook and handed it to Emma. "Works on spoiled goats every time."

Then he followed his family out the door . . .relieved that the Zelena menace was ended for all time.

Outside Marie noticed people were staring at them. Archie, his confidence given an enormous boost when Marie accepted his proposal was more than willing now to give them something to stare at…and talk about. He set their daughter on her feet and took Marie into his arms for a kiss.

"…What does he see in her? She's one of those dancers!"

"Probably thinks he has money."

He lifted his mouth from hers and turned to face the two women speaking. "There are people in this town who've done far worse and you forget…I've heard about it but I'm not the type to air a person's dirty laundry in public. And you also tend to forget we were all cursed for the last twenty-eight years and we should not be judged for our actions during it. I don't give a damn what ANYONE in this town says, Marie is going to be my wife and Gisella is my daughter. And before you go about ruining someone else's life with your gossip you might want to concentrate on improving your own! Now if you'll all excuse me, we'll be going home."

He left them standing there mouths agape and holding the hands of the two people he loved most in the world; they started walking down the street toward home.

"…Hey Devereaux! You have a visitor!"

Gaston smirked. He couldn't wait for Zelena to tell him the potion was a success and that slut Marie and her cricket lover were history. He hid the Playboy magazine he'd bartered a pack of cigarettes for under the mattress and followed the guard to the visiting area. He approached the table expecting to see Zelena waiting for him, his mouth dropped open when he realized it wasn't her.

Archie smiled devilishly. "You look like you've been castrated, Devereaux. Were you expecting to see a cricket? Sorry to disappoint you but your little scheme failed. And you're going to leave us alone from now on."

"Will I?" he sneered.

"Yes, you are. There's no one else left to do your dirty work. We've seen to that."

"So why are you here?"

Archie slapped a stack of papers and a pen down on the table. "I want you to sign away your rights to my daughter. You don't want her, you never have."

"What do I get out it?"

"You'll no longer have to pay child support for her. She'll be my responsibility from now on."

Gaston laughed. "Have fun trying to get Marie to go along with it. She's been trying to squeeze money out of me for the little brat since we came to this world. You're doing this behind her back, aren't you?"

"No. She wants you out of our lives as much as I do. Sign it," Archie demanded and leaned across the table, simmering with rage. He was tired of this man thinking he could try to destroy their happiness.

The other man laughed. "You really are an idiot, Hopper. She's gonna take you for all you're worth." He grabbed the pen and scribbled his name on the line.

"No, you're the idiot. Did you happen to forget that the prison system has a food chain? Might want to keep your mouth shut about just what it is you're in here for…or you might end up being the food."

Good gods! I sound like Rumple! he thought. Oh, but it was worth it seeing the terrified expression on Gaston's face! He snatched up the papers and walked out of the room, hoping this was the last time he'd ever after to face the bastard.

Marie was waiting for him by the car outside. "Did you get it?" she asked hopefully. He held the paper out to her. When she saw the signature she threw herself into his arms and kissed him. "Can we get everything filed today?"

"I'll talk to Judge Midas and see what he says…and Rumple's looking into it too. I don't want to tell Gisella until we're sure, okay?"

"It doesn't matter. You're already her father in her eyes. All we're trying to do is make it official."

"Speaking of official….we should talk about the wedding."

"Then let's go somewhere private and discuss it," she said with a smile.

They drove to the park and though they enjoyed having more time together, they were ready to return to work but Mina and Jack insisted they weren't ready yet.

"I've been thinking…and it may sound strange coming from me but then I remembered Rumple and Belle's wedding and how they had sort of a theme…and there's nothing I'd want to see more than you looking like the goddess you are to me…." Archie blurted.

"You want a Greek mythology themed wedding?" she asked him.

He nodded.

She took his hands in hers. "Then let's do it! There's nothing I'd want more than to see you standing there as the Adonis you are to me," she murmured. "Belle will stand with me like I should have at her wedding…my papa can give me away…and you can either have Geppetto or Rumple stand with you. It'll take some time to get everything together…but I can't wait!" she cried and embraced him.

"Neither can I." he agreed as he kissed her. "Let's wait till after Rumple and Belle's baby shower and the summer festival…that way everything isn't so rushed."

"Belle told me she wished she and Rumple had a proper honeymoon but with everything that was going on they never got the chance. They just decided to go on one later on. I don't think I can wait that long."

"Since we're having a mythological wedding we could go to Greece and Rome for a few months but I want Gisella, Mary and Pongo to come with us. We can still find time to be alone too."

"You've been thinking about this a while, haven't you?"

Archie smiled. "I started thinking about us being a family when I was still a cricket, Marie. It's all I've ever wanted. I just wish I could've told you then."

"Unfortunately I would have called you a crazy insect for thinking it was possible," Marie said with a frown. "Or maybe not. When you gave me that rose I was asking myself why I couldn't find a man to be that romantic to me. I wasn't looking in the right place. If I'd kissed you then…I could've broken your enchantment!"

"Rumple felt it was best you didn't. Our bond would've been stronger and once the second curse hit we would've suffered worse than we already did. Look what happened to Snow and David. He was in a coma for most of the curse."

"The curse is weakening but it still needs to be broken. Poor Regina….she lost her memory of the time she had with Robin Locksley. Thank the gods we're not having memory lapses."

"We did, Marie. Our memory of having met back in our land was gone…but somehow we remembered how we felt."

"Remember The Feeling…it's one of my favorite songs on Chicago 17," Marie said. "Strange how it fits us because of that…"

The one he felt fit how he felt about her…about them now was 'You're The Inspiration.'

As if she sensed what he was thinking she added: "but the one that makes me think of you is 'You're The Inspiration'."

"That's what I hear in my head when I think about you now. Before it was Along Comes a Woman."

"If we ever went to one of Chicago's concerts and told the band members this story, they'd look at us like we were insane!"

He chuckled. "I still do want to go to a concert sometime. Maybe during our honeymoon?"

"We're going. And maybe they'll play our song…" she whispered.

As much as he loved to see their favorite band in concert, he was going to make sure 'their' song was going to be played first. He didn't give a damn who was singing it, as long as they heard it.

"Hey strangers!" they heard Becky call out. They turned around and saw her, Kat and Andi walking toward them. The former Scorpions sat across from them at the picnic table.

"What are you girls up to?" Archie asked them.

"Nothing much. What are you up to?" Andi grinned at them. "Quite a kiss there, Doc."

He blushed. "And you three shouldn't have been watching."

"He is cute when he does that," Becky giggled.

"You're lucky I like you Becky or you'd be getting the Bordreaux Broom to your butt for ogling my man." Marie cautioned.

"I got my own man…and admit it: he is."

"Sooo…a little birdie told us you finally popped the question Doctor Hopper. When's the wedding?" Kat asked.

"We were thinking sometime after the summer festival," Archie replied.

"Are you gonna have a theme like Mr. Gold and Belle did?"

"We are…Greek Mythology. Archie calls me his Aphrodite so we're going to have everyone dress up like Greek gods and goddesses."

"That's so cool!" Becky exclaimed. "That means Mr. Gold's gonna be Hades I bet…."

"Better be wearing leather…" Kat murmured.

"His son better too," added Andi.

"Well we're all gonna be there because you guys deserve it after all the shit you went through with that dick Gaston. Hope some big guy turns him into his bitch and gives him what he deserves!" Becky snarled.

"He shoulda had his balls cut off and mounted on a wall!" Kat said angrily.

"Belle wanted to do that but Mr. Gold talked her out of it," Andi told her. "I think he would have done it himself too but he whipped his ass good in court and Spencer got run out of town on rail like he deserved to."

One of the girls' cellphones rang with a message. "Hey guys….we gotta get going the boys are waiting."

"Oh…before you do….how would you like to come over to the house this weekend…Sunday? I was planning on asking Rumple and Belle anyway," Archie invited.

"That'd be great. I'll ask my dad but I'm sure he'll say yes if he knows I'm going to your house!" Kat exclaimed.

"My mom will too," said Becky.

"Mark will definitely say yes," Andi assured them.

"All right. We'll have a cookout and you kids can swim in the pool."

"Excellent!" they all cheered.

"I'll call Belle and ask her right now!" Marie cried.

The Golds were thrilled with the idea and Rumple made the macaroni and potato salad for the cookout and some of his Golden Delights because he knew the kids loved them. Everyone arrived at the Hopper house at noon on Sunday.

"Why don't you kids go swimming until everything's ready?" Belle suggested while she and Marie were getting everything set up at the picnic table. Archie was cooking hamburgers, hot dogs, steaks and chicken on the grill while he was listening to Chicago's latest album on his phone.

"You know how to swim, Gisella?" Andi asked her.

"Uh-huh. Mommy and Daddy taught me."

"You have a diving board too!" Becky cried excitedly.

"Hey Bae! I dare ya to do a cannonball," Ewan whispered.

"What? You think I can't? I do know how to swim."

"Do it, mate!" urged Bobby.

"Ummm...I think Archie'll get mad..." Kat said.

Andi got in the pool with Gisella and the other girls followed suit. Ewan and Bobby started clucking at Bae thinking he'd chicken out.

"It's what a pool's for," argued the former thief. Urged on by his friends, Bae stepped onto the diving board and sprang up into the air, doing a perfect cannonball into the pool. And water arced everywhere.

"Baelfire!" Archie yelled. "What the hell was that?!"

"Bae!" Belle cried and stood up, her clothes soaked.

Marie glared at her nephew.

Rumple had been sunning himself beside the pool in a deck chair and water had just drenched him and the book he'd been reading AND his phone in his pocket. "Baelfire Gold! My God, look what you've done!" He gave his son a Dark One glare.

The boys were laughing and hi-fived their friend.

"Not funny, young man!" growled the sorcerer.

"I'll say it wasn't. You do that again and you are banned from my pool, young man!" Archie said sharply.

"And you'll be grounded and made to clean this pool with a toothbrush!" Rumple added.

Archie grinned, liking that idea.

"Papa, I didn't mean to get you all wet," Bae protested.

That was so cool!" exclaimed Gisella.

"Oh no it wasn't Gisella Hopper," her mother chastised.

"And what did you think would happen when you did that, huh?" demanded his father. "We were gonna remain dry? Use your head, Baelfire! For something besides dares and pranks."

He gestured and his clothes were dry and so were Belle's. "I hope my phone is all right," he muttered and dried it as well. "Or someone's buying me a new one out of his allowance."

"Papa, chill," Bae muttered. "It's not like I pushed you in."

"Better quit while you're ahead, Fire," Andi advised.

"You might as well have," Rumple said balefully.

"And mind the attitude, mister."

He checked his phone. It seemed to be working okay. Then he fixed the soaked book he'd been reading-a suspense thriller by Dan Brown.

"Is that the latest Robert Langdon?" asked Archie

"Okay, m'sorry."

"Yes. Inferno," Rumple replied. Then he said to his son, "Don't do that again."

"Thank God we aren't sleeping together yet. You'd keep me up all night until you finish the thing," Marie muttered.

"Marie!" Archie cried and blushed.

The female Scorpions looked at each other and smirked.

Belle chuckled. "I can't complain about that, since I read into the wee hours of the morning too."

"And so now we read together," Rumple smirked, and winked at his wife.

"And don't tell me you aren't up late with your nose in a book either, Marie. I've gotten up to go to the bathroom as late as two in the morning and seen a light under your door." her fiancé argued.

"When I'm reading an old Dark Hunter book, yes. The new ones bore me to death."

"A lot of those books tend to get formulaic after a while," Rumple remarked. "I find the same thing is true with the new James Pattersons."

"We don't read together. I read suspense she reads...whatever..." Archie mumbled.

'Oh we don't read the same books," Rumple amended. "We each read our own. But we curl up near each other."

"Dark Hunter books are a twist on the Greek gods with Atlanteans thrown in," Marie said. "But I kinda lost interest after Acheron."

"And we debate the plots, don't we Rumple? I just finished a novel on Joan of Arc," Belle mused. "And I got so mad when they put her on trial-it was so bogus…"

"….that she punched me right in the arm and screamed "You stupid idiots!" he finished.

Actually the word she had used was a lot more colorful but he wasn't going to say it in front of the children.

"I thought Archie was fighting with someone one night...turns out he was just angry at something he read."

"It was one of the Women's Murder Club books...I figured everything out halfway through it."

"When Belle read Message in A Bottle, she got so mad she threw the book across the bed." Rumple recounted gleefully. "And that's why I don't read those-too predictable."

"And Marie, I thought I was going to have to buy stock in Kleenex while you were reading that damned Acheron book...all nine hundred or so pages of it!"

"It was sad! The man was tortured while he was a human...!"

Belle made a face. "Reminds me of what they did to poor Joan."

"Well, you don't have to beat me up, dearie. I didn't torture her," Rumple pointed out.

"Sorry, darling, you were the closest man around," Belle apologized.

"Oh if you think that's bad...I was made to sit through four seasons of the Tudors." Archie said.

"I suppose I'm lucky you didn't get out the broom," muttered her husband. "You sure you want to get married, Hopper?"

"Yes, I do...when she's not annoying me."

"What annoyed me was YOU sitting there pointing out all the historical inaccuracies in my show!" Marie said angrily.

"There were too many to count!"

"I thought I was watching it with my sister for minute because you sounded like Belle!"

"I'll take that as a compliment . . I think," Belle said impishly. "And don't ever watch a crime drama with Rumple, he'll quote you chapter and verse about the wrong way they use the law."

"Oh God...hopeless...all of you! Can't you just enjoy it?"

"Well, dearie, I'm jerked out of my suspension of disbelief when they make a plotline so asinine the only way it could be real is on TV." Rumple answered. "A little deviation is fine, but some of these shows . . it's obvious they didn't even do research on the laws!"

"At least they can't analyze The Walking dead, right guys?" Bobby asked. His friends nodded in agreement.

"And if you're going to put something historical on the air, read about it first!" Archie argued.

"You're just mad because I said Henry was cute," Marie teased.

"Yes, well, why wasn't he overweight like he was supposed to be in Season 4 and stinking like death with his infected leg?"

"When we watched Sleepless In Seattle, Belle said Tom Hanks was adorable . . . and I asked her which part and she said everything!" grumbled Rumple.

"I wanted to shove my umbrella through the TV!"

"I wanted to beat him with my cane."

"Rumple, you're so silly!" Belle chided. "Getting jealous over an actor I've never met in my life and probably never will."

"You won't dearie. Trust me. Otherwise I'll be tempted to beat him with an ugly stick."

"And you are so cute when you're jealous..." Marie purred to Archie. "Rumple you should have seen him the night of the manhood intervention."

"No, he wouldn't have wanted to because he would have turned me back into a cricket after I tried to whack him with my umbrella."

"I was the one doing most of the work..."

"Well you overdid it!"

"Seriously? I was still mostly frozen from squid ink, dearie, and if I'd had a choice I would have been anywhere BUT there," Rumple protested.

"I was still mad," Archie grumbled.

"Mad enough to ask me out."

"I got tired of sneaking around."

"Are we gonna eat or you guys gonna complain all day?" demanded Gisella.

"Sella!" Marie cried.

"Yeah, I'm starving," Bae complained.

"We should do this every weekend," Belle said.

"Yes we should, since we have the two best cooks in Storybrooke." Marie agreed.

"What do you think Rumple...every Sunday we get together here, our house or the cabin?"

"It's fine with me. What do you say Archie?"

He smiled, switched his spatula to his other hand and shook Rumple's. "The deal is struck."

"Rubbing off on you, aren't I, dearie?" Rumple giggled.

"I don't know if I should be worried about that or not," Marie mused.

"I wouldn't be," Belle said dreamily.

"I would," Bae grouched. His father cuffed him alongside the head. "You're already in serious trouble with me, boy. Crack of dawn next weekend I want ye up and cleaning."

Bae groaned.

Before the Golds left for the evening, Rumple and Archie discussed what they would make for the baby shower coming up. They decided to do all of the cooking at Rumple's house except for his chili. He would make that at home and heat it up at the Gold house that day.

"Ahhh dammit!" Archie grouched a few days later when he walked into the kitchen and found that his deep freezer was leaking and everything in it was spoiled.

"Baby, what's wrong…oh no!" Marie cried when she noticed the reason for her fiancé's distress. "Archie….we just bought all that!" she cried.

"I know…could you get me some trash bags, please?"

He lifted the lid and nearly gagged from the smell coming out of it. The couple started taking everything out of it and threw it into trash bags for the collector to pick up that day. "Can you go to the store and get some of the things we need for the shower while I try to get that daughter of ours out of bed?"

Marie thought she had the easier of the two tasks. Her daughter could be as grouchy as she was in the morning.

Archie went upstairs and opened the curtains, letting the sunlight hit his sleeping daughter's face. "Rise and shine, Princess! It's another beautiful day!" he crooned in her ear, smiling when he remembered doing the same to her mother years earlier as a cricket.

Gisella threw her pillow over her head. "Don't wanna get up!"

"Come on, Princess. We're going to Aunt Belle and Uncle Rumple's baby shower."

"Wanna sleep…"

"Do we want an ice water wakeup?"

"No! M'getting' up!" Gisella cried and jumped out of bed, glaring at her father. "Why I gotta get up so early anyhow?"

"Because we have a lot to do before the shower starts. And besides, it's a beautiful day so you can play outside."

"Me and Mommy already made the baby bottles with candy in 'em."

"Yes, but your uncle and I have to do more cooking."

Gisella grabbed the clothes her mother laid out for her and raced down the hall to the bathroom.

"We're heeeerreeeee!" she sang out when they arrived at the Gold house.

"Hey, scamp! You sound like the kid from Poltergeist," Bae laughed.

"The kid from what?" she asked.

"Never mind. You're not watching it till you're older," her father said, a large crockpot in his hands while Marie carried bags from the grocery store.

"It's a scary movie you're not allowed to watch yet." Bae told her.

"Yeah, Daddy doesn't like scary movies and neither does Mommy. They watch old stuff."

Her cousin laughed. "So do mine." Bae led the way into the kitchen, his nose twitching at the aroma coming from it. "Papa, can I have some hot wings?" he begged. "I gotta take something for me and Andi to eat on the fishing trip." He was going fishing with his girlfriend while the shower was going on.

"Bae, I will fix you something before you leave. Don't pester me now," Gold ordered, his mind trying to do ten things at once.

"Okay, don't have a cow!"

"I'm coming, Rum!" Archie called out knowing how stressful having to do a lot of cooking was.

Bae snatched a deviled egg from the tray Rumple was lining them up on. "Mmm . . .!" he said then yelped when his father swatted his hand with a wooden spoon. "Oww! I'm hungry!"

"Get your sticky fingers out of my food!" his father snapped exasperatedly.

"Sticky fingers in a kitchen get swatted...don't they Sella?" Archie asked his daughter.

"Ummm...yeah...but I was hungry."

"Yeah, see?" Bae pointed out.

"There's plenty of food in the fridge, go eat it," Rumple said. "But leave the food for the party alone. If I have any extra, you can have it."

"Sella, go help your mom and Aunt Belle."

"Okay Daddy!" the little girl skipped off to the office.

Bae hung around the kitchen, hoping to sneak some wings when Rumple's back was turned. He grabbed a can of iced tea from the fridge and sipped it, leaning on the counter and watching the men cooking.

Major lay by his feet, hoping something would fall on the floor.

"Sorry we were running late this morning, Rum but that daughter of mine did not want to get out of bed this morning...and gods is she cranky when she first gets up!"

"Uh-huh. Like that one over there," he jerked his thumb at his son.

"Then my damned deep freeze went down and I had to throw a lot of stuff out which is why we had to go shopping."

"Always something," Gold sighed, and crossed off three things on his list-wings with sauces, deviled eggs, and pinwheels. He wrapped the tray of deviled eggs and pinwheels with plastic wrap before floating them into the fridge.

"I'll start the cornbread after I get my chili in the crockpot...I'm thinking I should've brought the roaster instead."

"My oven's big enough . . . and I'm not using it to heat anything. I've got magic for that, thank the gods. No need for Sternos and risk a fire starting by mistake," his almost brother-in-law replied. He had an industrial sized oven that could fit two twenty-five pound turkeys if necessary.

While the ground beef was cooking on the stove, Archie chopped up onions and green peppers to toss in with it along with several packs of Roast Beef seasoning taken from packs of Ramen noodles.

Bae was drooling by then and watching for his chance to snatch some wings from the foil pans cooling on the counter.

Rumple went to get some ingredients for his redskin potato salad out of the fridge and the pantry.

Archie set a container with more of them and roast chicken ones for Rumple on the counter so he could duplicate his chicken breading recipe.

The former thief saw his chance then and grabbed a large spoon from the counter and scooped some buffalo wings onto it and began eating them.

He'd only managed to finish one when his hand was smacked with another spoon.

Rumple turned around and saw his son wolfing them down, sauce all over his face. "Baelfire! Must I send you to your room for time out?" he cried.

"Oww! What the-?

"Apparently you haven't learned your lesson," Archie smirked, holding the punishing spoon in his hand.

"The smell's driving me crazy!" the boy protested, sucking his fingers.

"YOU'RE driving me crazy!" Rumple said.

"Bae! Stop pestering your father!" yelled Belle from the office.

"Okay! My God, you and her with the hormones!" he muttered.

Belle now stood in the kitchen, her hands on her hips. "Baelfire Gold! Did you EAT some of the food for the party?"

He gave her a guilty look. "Umm . . . yeah . . . only a little though."

"Well that's the last time...OUT!" she pointed to the door.

"But Mama . . ."

"Yes, go and walk Major." Rumple agreed.

"OUT! O...U...T...Out!"

"Okay! Okay! C'mon, Maj! Let's go, before they end up having a meltdown . . ." Bae sighed, and picked up the dog's lead.

Major bounded to his feet, eager to go out.

Belle felt like she was going to have a meltdown. They wanted everything to be perfect for their baby shower, one of those things being making sure they had enough food for their guests.

"And while you're outside, check the stakes on the tent and make sure they're set right," his father called.

"Okay, Papa," Bae called, and then they heard the door slam.

"Impudent rascal!" Gold muttered. "Another minute of his sassy mouth and I was gonna break my own rule and tan his behind for him!"

"I have a feeling I may have to deal with this if Marie has a baby," Archie sighed.

"Yeah . . . and just wait till Sella's a teenager . . .it might be worse with girls," Rumple sighed. He began putting cut up potatoes in a pot of water to boil, then chopping up some celery and red onion.

"I'm going to have to stand on the porch with a shotgun! Marie already bought me that t-shirt with the rules for dating my daughter."

Rumple laughed. "If we have a girl, I'm going to have to get her an Everlast Chastity Belt . .. or else all her boyfriends are gonna end up slugs in the slug museum . . . or in the garden as lawn gnomes."

"It's going to happen sooner for me than you since Sella is already five!"

"Poor you! I'll send Bae over to help you. Whatever boys get past him and his fists you can shoot." Rumple said, and began mixing up his special mayonnaise dressing to put on the salad.

"I can throw a punch or two...those classes I took can't go to waste though I would have preferred to punch Gaston to a pulp after what he did to Marie!"

"Yes . . .I'd have preferred he be castrated like a rogue bull," Rumple said sharply. "With a dull knife and no anesthetic! But at least he's in jail for the foreseeable future, no parole, and has to pay child support for Sella."

"Just until the adoption goes through. Then there's the bitch Zelena..." Archie chuckled. "I STILL cannot believe she's now a green goat!"

Rumple smirked. "Well, you know what I always say, Hopper. All magic comes with a price! She thought she could get away with hurting someone in my family . . .again . . .and I just proved her wrong . .. again."

It was too bad, Rumple reflected, that Elmira had ever brought Zelena with her to visit Cora just before the curse was cast . . . and Regina had decided to bring the spoiled harpy to the new world to punish her for trying to kill her own sister in order to be the one to cast the curse with Cora. Had she been left behind . . .they wouldn't have had her to deal with. But what was done was done. And at least now she couldn't hurt anyone else.

"Would you like me to grate some cheddar cheese for the chili?" Rumple asked Archie. His potatoes had to cool before he could mix everything together.

"Can't be chili without it," Archie said. "I will tell you though...this is the mild form of the one I do for the cookoff. That's called Hopper's Hotter Than Hell Chili." He laughed. "The first year I entered everyone thought I'd never place."

"Yeah, we don't want the women suing us for starting bonfires in their stomachs . . . especially since some of them are elderly ladies who probably have easily up set digestive tracks," Rumple said. "But Bae and I will have to try the one you make for that. He loves spicy food . . .and I do too, when I'm not messed up from pregnancy hormones."

"I warn you...have plenty of water ready because your mouth will be on fire...and Leroy...has a habit of drinking beer when he eats my chili."

"And gets drunk off his ass," chuckled the wizard. "I'll make sure I eat plenty of cornbread . . .that'll soak up the hot peppers."

"Graham said once he was going to haul me off to jail for overpopulating the drunk tank."

"Ha! It's not your fault those yahoos don't realize that the way to put out hotness isn't with beer, it's with bread . . .followed by some water."

The chili was ready to go into the oven. While it was cooking Archie started working on the cornbread.

Rumple started grating cheddar off a block of sharp Wisconsin, and then chopped up some green onions as well. "There's sour cream in the fridge too." He said, and then sighed. "I miss my enchanted kitchen. It was always so amusing cooking with them. Especially my salt shakers."

Archie laughed. "I can't believe I forgot about them...I just find it strange my memories of the time I spent in your castle didn't come back until Marie kissed me as a cricket."

"That was Cora's doing," Rumple remarked. "She did that on purpose, muddled up your memories."

"Uh . . . what happened to them once the curse was cast?"

"They remained behind in the castle. And to prevent them from being lonely and missing us, I put them into an enchanted sleep. Same with my goat Bess, and also put a spell on them to halt aging . . .they'll be asleep until I return to the castle again one day."

"The only reason why Cora messed with my memories is because I tried to help Regina," Archie said angrily. "And do you want to go back there?"

"Yes. After the baby's born. But maybe not permanently. Perhaps we can spend half a year at the castle and half a year here in Storybrooke. After all, my baby will have ties to both worlds, like we do, so no reason why we can't live in both."

"There isn't anything there I would want to go back to...but you know Marie...if Belle goes she'll want to."

"You're always welcome to stay at my castle . . . which I think I'll have to rename now that I'm no longer the Dark One."

"True...my opinion of you changed not long after I arrived. Now...it did take a bit longer to change my mind about Marie...she's still a feisty woman."

"But they're the best kind. They're not afraid to speak their mind to you and they like being partners. They also aren't bitches who enjoy humiliating you and treating you like dirt, like Milah."

"The hardest thing I ever had to do was say goodbye to her that day..."

"It tore me apart losing Belle and Bae, so thank the gods I couldn't remember it," Rumple said. "I would have been a basket case. And easy prey for the Dark One to take hold of me again."

Not wanting to dredge up painful memories, Archie changed the subject to something else. "Do you and Belle know what the baby is yet?"

"No. Belle and I opted to not find out. I know that in this world a lot of people do so, but . . .I want to be surprised and knowing isn't going to really change the theme of our nursery and shopping for the first clothes, since a baby grows so quickly, we can always personalize the wardrobe when it's a little older. Since this was a miracle and an unexpected surprise to begin with, we felt we should have it continue to be so till Belle delivers. Besides, in our old realm, it would be the same . . .and that's half the fun, not knowing."

"Then you and Belle have already begun to shop for the nursery? What theme have you chosen?" Archie asked curiously.

"Yes. And we decided the theme should be something about favorite children's books, and Bae painted scenes from several of them . . . like Narnia, Jungle Book, Dr. Seuss, Beauty and the Beast, and some nursery rhymes on the wall. The playroom next to it continues with more storybook characters," Rumple explained.

Bae had really enjoyed that project and did a wonderful job, making the characters so life like they almost seemed real.

"Sella already wants her room redone!"

Rumple laughed. "She needs to talk to Bae about the artwork then."

"I had to draw the line at a dartboard with Zelena and Gaston's pictures on them. Not that I don't blame her but...she's had enough violence in her life."

"Yes. I said the same thing to Bae when he wanted to make an effigy of Etienne and burn it," Rumple chuckled.

"I'm hoping after the wedding things settle down a bit..."

"Yes. Well, by then I should be done with most of my cases and have some free time before Belle delivers."

"Regina told me the other day I HAVE to be in the cook off for the festival or else..." He sighed. "At least this year she's doing something different and making it a team event."

Rumple raised an eyebrow. "What's that mean?"

"Well before one person submitted something, this time she wants everyone in groups for the cook off and the games...you get to pick your team name, have your own flag and tent...I forgot...you never went to the festival during the curse."

"Anyway...the bake off was separate but she's combining all the culinary events into one."

"And since I'm actually baking this year . .. I'll give them some competition." Rumple said. "You've never tasted my peanut butter chocolate chip cookies, but you will today. I made them for this shower."

"So then I won't have Granny saying she'll wipe the ground with me?"

Rumple shook his head. "No. She's good . . . but I'm better. Trust me."

"I have to tell her today who is on my team and what our name is." He thought about not asking because he thought the Golds would be too busy but Marie, who knew how much he loved the event insisted he work up the courage to ask.

"But if you're ummm..busy...Marie, Sella and I can do it..."

"No, I'm not. And I'd be proud to be on your team." Gold answered.

"You would!?" his eyes lit up. "Marie!"

"What is it honey?"

The psychologist was grinning from ear to ear. "I think we may sweep the festival this year."

"Ooo...Daddy...I wanna do the sack race with Bae!" Gisella cried excitedly.

"I'm sure he wouldn't mind," said her uncle. "He likes races."

""I doubt I'll be able to do anything," Belle said sadly. "I'll be as big as house by then."

"Aunt Belle you and Uncle Rumple can do the kissing contest." her little niece spoke up.

"You could judge the kids' stories for the Best Creative Story," Marie said.

"Oh I forgot about that...I always did judge them!"

"And we could always do the other one too," Rumple agreed.

Archie laughed. "You DO have to come up for air once in a while you know."

"Look who's talking!" Marie teased her fiance.

Rumple stirred the drunken hotdogs on the stove and asked, "So are you two entering it?"

"No...only one couple per team but when it wasn't a team event, yes we would have...give you two a run for your money," Marie added with a wink.

"You think, sister dear! Rumple and I can outkiss any couple in this town!" Belle boasted.

"And show those youngsters that an old married couple can still light their fire!" Rumple smirked.

"You'll have to get a room!" Bae called from the doorway and unhooked Major from his leash.

Major ran into the kitchen and sat down before Gold and offered his paw.

Pongo lay under the table by Archie's feet.

"Hey Bae, we're all gonna be a team for the summer festival...you wanna do the sack race with me?" asked Gisella hopefully.

Belle and Marie went outside to start decorating the tables and chairs Bae set up for them while he was outside. There was a bassinet filled with gifts and each guest could choose one to take home.

Bae thought about it while Rumple gave Major a biscuit. "Yeah, why not?" During the curse he'd never participated in the festival . . . except to pick pockets and use the fact that people were all away from their homes to burgle them.

"Yeah 'cause I wanna beat the dirty undies off that mean Mikaela Gordon!" Gissella said angrily.

"Who's that?" Bae laughed.

"Some mean girl in my school...she says my mommy's a ho and my daddy's a moron for marryin her and I wanna kick her butt!"

"And what did I say about that Gisella Bordreaux Hopper?" her father demanded sternly.

"Just 'nore her...but Daddy..."

"No buts. You're not getting into fights at school and that's my final word on it."

"And who does THAT sound like Rumple?' Belle asked her husband but she was looking at their son. They came back in the house to bring out more items when they heard Archie lecturing Gisella about fighting. All they needed to do yet outside was take out the food and set up the buffet table. Bae kept trying to snatch cookies off one of the trays while Belle was carrying it outside. She swatted his hands away. "Stop it or your father will ground you for a month and I'll make you write the longest essay of your life on manners!"

Her son sighed. "Then I want some for my fishing trip today. If I wait till I get home, they'll all be gone!"

Rumple just looked commiseratingly at Archie. "Been there and done that."

"I've been to the school about it twice and no one seems to want to do anything with that damned girl because she's related to Spencer."

"Figures. That family and the Devereauxs are like bad pennies. Always causing trouble and showing up when you don't need them to." Gold scowled. "If necessary I can go talk to the brat's parents, threaten to slap them with a lawsuit for bullying that'll take them the rest of their grandkid's lives to pay off if they don't teach their child some manners."

The laws regarding bullying in school had gotten a lot stricter since Storybrooke was founded, and Gold was prepared to use that for all he was worth if the brat persisted in her persecution.

"There's a few of them that do it but the Gordon girl's the worst."

Gold's mouth tightened. "Then it's going to stop. I make an example out of her and the others will think twice . . . or else."

"Do it, Papa," Bae urged. "Now that Eti the Yeti's going to juvie and so's Savannah probably, nobody dares to talk trash about you around me."

"What bothers me about is they're all girls who have someone working at the Foxtrot."

"Probably Zelena's influence," muttered Belle. "Or their parents are jealous that Marie has found someone who loves her despite her past and they haven't. Sour grapes."

"That's what I'm thinking because I went with Marie the day she quit over there and those cats wanted to claw her eyes out."

"Jealous witches," Rumple growled. "They make their own choices, no reason to take it out on innocent children. They can quit too . . .only they don't want to lose the money . . .like Blue. Respectability comes with a price too."

He put the hot dogs into a serving bowl. "Either way, I don't care why they're doing it, what matters is making it stop. So unless they want to be bankrupt and living in a cardboard box they're going to make these kids mind their mouths."

"I hate having to add another lawsuit on you but I'm at my wits end."

Had they lived in any other town, he would've had the option to move his daughter to another school."

"It's what they deserve," Rumple declared heatedly. "I'm sick and tired of these bullies not being put down hard for their attitudes. This the age where it starts . . .and needs to be nipped in the bud. And if the parents aren't going to stop it . . . I will."

"I almost got thrown out of the principal's office because I lost my temper at one of them...and called her some not so nice things."

He recalled too well the misery of growing up with the stigma of bastard and coward and other hurtful comments during his childhood, causing him to have no real friends except the women who took care of him.

Rumple grinned. "Good for you! Show those petty cats you're nobody's doormat, Archie!"

"Yeah the hypocrites!" Bae sneered. "Tell 'em to look in the mirror!"

"I think I shocked Lydia Gordon the most when I asked her how much more plastic she was going to invest in."

Bae and Rumple cracked up. "Good one, Archie!" Rumple sniggered. 'What did she say?"

"She just stood there with her mouth open and then I said you might want to close that before it attracts flies and crickets wouldn't go near it with a ten foot pole."

"Nice one!" the former Dark One said, his eyes sparkling wickedly.

"Well, insult my daughter and Marie and this cricket speaks loud and carries a big umbrella!" Archie said, picking up the crockpot and carrying it outside.

"Family defends family," the pawnbroker said approvingly.

It was something the psychologist learned well the moment Marie and Gisella entered his life.

Once the food was set up on the table for the party, Rumple returned to the house, and as he had promised, began making a cooler for Bae to take with him on the fishing trip. He put in all the food he had made for the party in small amounts . . .including his Golden Delights, which were what he called his peanut butter chocolate chip cookies. Then he handed the cooler to his son and said, "Here, Bae. See, I didn't forget you."

He had taken the food from the extra trays and pans he'd made, as he always made extra.

"Thanks Papa...better get going before the fish stop biting!"

"Yes . . .and make sure you come up for air while you still have bait on your hook!" teased his father.

"I know how to fish Papa...you wait...I'll come home with some of the biggest fish you've ever eaten!"

"I look forward to it. And hopefully you do, scamp." He ruffled his son's hair.

A horn beeped in the driveway and everyone was shocked to see Regina stepping out of her Mercedes, her arms loaded with gifts.

"I wanted to stop by and deliver these in person," she said.

Belle smiled at her. "Thank you, Regina." She took the gifts from her and put them on a table reserved for them. "How's Jason settling in?"

"Just fine...Henry likes having a brother...oh...Marie one of those is for you and Archie."

She glanced over at Archie. "Jason will need some sessions set up...been having nightmares."

"Of course. Call my office Monday and I'll set up something. Would you like to be present for them?"

"Yes...he prefers it that way."

"It's what I prefer too in such a young child," the therapist said.

"You might have an opening that day Archie," Marie told him.

"You can check my schedule when we go in Monday," he said calmly.

"I'll be able to check it on the laptop at home since I keep a backup there."

"Okay. If I do, we'll call you," he promised the mayor.

"And do you have an answer for me about the festival?"

Archie nodded. "Yes. It's going to be me, Marie, Gisella, Rumple, Belle, and Bae."

"And your team name?"

"How 'bout Spinning Crickets cause Uncle Rumple spins and Daddy likes crickets?" Gisella suggested.

Bae smiled. "Cute, Sella. Or how about Golden Wishes, since all of our wishes, except one, have come true and it's a play on my last name?"

"Kay...what wish didn't come true yet?"

"The baby my mama has needs to get born," he reminded her.

"Oh...and Mommy and Daddy gotta get married!"

"Yes, that too," agreed Bae.

"You want that for your name Archie? Golden Wishes?' inquired Regina.

"If everyone agrees..."

"Sounds fine to me," Rumple said.

"I love it." Belle murmured.

"So do I," agreed Marie.

"Me too!' Gisella said.

"All right, Golden Wishes it is then. Just remember to have your team flag ready for the opening ceremony march."

"We will, dearie," Rumple said. He gave her a small plate of Golden Delights. "Here, take this home to your boys."

"Those smell delicious...Granny is going to flip her lid when she realizes she has competition."

Rumple grinned wickedly. "Good. A little competition never hurt anyone."

"I'd better get going before my boys start worrying. Enjoy your gifts."

"Thank you, we will!" Belle assured her.

"I like her better now than I did during the curse," Marie said.

"Yes," agreed Belle. "It seems she's finally started to put aside her need for revenge and look at this as a chance to try and do things differently . .. for herself and the children she's raising. "

"She still has a lot of things to work out," Archie said softly.

"As do we all," Gold said. "I'm surprised you're not swamped with patients."

"I was at first but things are settling down and having Jack and Mina there is a huge help."

"A few of them were busybodies that don't like the idea of seeing me when they walk into his office," Marie said bitterly.

"Oh, tell them to shut up and deal with it!" Bae said.

Just then he heard the sound of Mark's horn beeping in the driveway, and grabbed the cooler and his fishing gear and called, "See ya! Have a good time opening up all the gifts. Gotta go!" Mark was dropping them off at the lake.

"I'd like to but I'm every inch the professional at work."

"Later alligator!" Giselle called after him.

Several more cars pulled up. Ruby, granny and Snow were in the first car, Mallory and Tiana were in the second and Barbara Allen and her grandmother were in the third.

A fourth car came up and Mrs. Muffet and her niece, Angela, got out, whom she lived with after getting divorced from Homer on grounds of irreconcilable differences.

Next Elmira Gulch rode up on her bicycle.

Major whined at the number of strangers intent on invading his home, but quieted when Gold gave him a signal to relax.

The ladies set their presents for the couple on one of the empty tables and took their seats after choosing a surprise gift from the bassinet.

There were at least fifty women in attendance, a higher turnout than they expected but thankfully they had enough room and food for everyone.

Emma arrived a few minutes later, carrying a large box.

"Fashionably late honey?" joked Snow.

"Yeah. Jeff was driving me nuts about some football game he was watching with Dad and I forgot the present because I was so annoyed with them and had to go back and get it." She indicated the large box wrapped in stork paper.

Marie snorted. "Some men! Not these two.." she pointed at her fiance and brother-in-law.

"There'll be none of those silly manhood interventions if Doctor Hopper goes through the same thing Rumple is when you have a baby, Marie," the baroness said.

"They're the ones who cooked all the food for the shower," Belle said.

"Not if I have anything to say about it," Rumple cried.

"Ummm...we ahhh...have to get married first..." Marie said nervously.

"Do you have the nursery ready yet?" quizzed Mallory.

Belle passed around some pictures they took of the nursery after it was finished. "Our son is quite the artist," she said proudly.

"And you still don't know yet? Why not?"

All the women praised Bae's talent and Mrs. Muffet said, "And polite too. He held the door open when I was going into the supermarket the other day."

"A gentleman...like his father," murmured Belle.

"Unlike that hoodlum Devereaux boy," scowled Dana, the mother of Missy and Timmy whom Bae and Andi had saved.

"That one had manners worse than a pig!" Granny snorted. "Used to come into the diner and order a huge breakfast and leave poor Ruby a quarter tip! And a mess all over afterwards."

"And the worst thing you can do is not tip a server properly. Even I know that!" Archie exclaimed.

"And I told Myra Harte she needed to put her foot down with Savannah," Elmira said. "But she wouldn't listen to me . . . let her daughter run wild . . .going out to all hours with that rogue boy, giving her an attitude . . .humph! No wonder the girl turned out like she did."

Mrs. Muffet rolled her eyes. "That wouldn't have been MY daughter! But Myra was always a meek little thing. "She's just high spirited" she used to say. That kind of high spirits needed curbing with a slipper to her behind!"

Elmira nodded. "The stories I could tell you about her, right, Belle? Once she told her mother to shut the F up! At the parent teacher conference I had with her because she was failing my class!"

The other women gasped.

Emma frowned. "Any kid of mine who spoke to me with such disrespect would have been eating Ivory and been grounded for a year."

"Mommy what's shut the f up mean?' Gisella asked her mother.

"Never mind and if I hear that word coming out of your mouth Gisella Bordreaux Hopper you'll be tasting Dove." warned her father.

"And time out and a swat too," Rumple added. "It's not something you should ever say . . . especially to your parents."

"Ooooo so it's the BIG dirty word that Eti the Yeti uses?"

"Yes." Rumple nodded.

"Okay I won't do it cause I don't like tasting Dove. It sucks."

They all laughed at her honesty.

"Can we play games now?"

"We have to eat first, Sella," her mother answered.

"And we have all the food out here on the patio," Belle said, leading the way outside.

Rumple and Archie would serve the food to the guests, with Archie serving his chili and Rumple the rest of the hot dishes, as well as telling everyone what was there.

Snow glanced down at Rumple's feet clad in slippers. "Swollen feet. One of the worst parts of being pregnant."

"Don't I know it. And Belle's are worse than mine."

"You boys didn't have to go to all this trouble...we could've served ourselves buffet style," said Elmira.

"That talk Rumple gave those idiot men did some of them good but not my Bill," grumbled the baroness.

"It's no trouble," Rumple said gallantly. "This way you know what's there so you don't take something you don't like."

"I do have certain allergies," Elmira admitted.

"Toned down the chili a bit eh, Doc?' Granny teased.

"Yes, since some people can't tolerate the full recipe," Archie replied. "But you'll have the original version for the festival."

"I'm trying out a new recipe this year...festival needs a queen of the cook off this year not a king..."

"You might want to rethink that, dearie. Since I'm participating in it too," Gold informed her.

"Oh, are you?" asked Mrs Muffett. "Granny we're in trouble because these boys are good cooks!"

"Thanks! And may the best cook win!" Rumple said.

Of course he was confident he would win for his Golden Dream cookies.

"That'll be me," Granny boasted with a grin.

And Archie wasn't called the chili king for nothing.

"I would love to take some of this home," Snow said.

"So would I, to show my husband a man can actually cook!"

"You can," Rumple said. "I have Tupperware."

The baroness smiled. "Any good cook does, dear."

"And just wait till ya taste the dessert!" Gisella bragged.

"Oh and what is for dessert, sweetie?" asked Ariel.

"It's not roadkill cause Uncle Rumple cooks real good and now Daddy bakes good too."

"Because Rumple taught me," Archie chuckled.

"Sella!" Marie groaned, shaking her head.

"Uncle Rumple made his Golden Delight cookies . . .an' a chocolate cake with bananas in the middle . . .and umm . . .I forget what else . . ."

"A marble cheesecake and parfaits, princess," her father supplied.

"Yeah that. Yummy!" she ate a pinwheel, smiling.

After everyone finished eating the men gathered up all the dishes that the women weren't going to use and put them aside to be washed.

The women all had some of the food and desserts set aside in Tupperware containers to take home for later.

Ruby nearly inhaled her Golden Delights, finding them amazing.

"This strawberry parfait is...divine!" exclaimed Tiana.

"Oh god...this cheesecake...sinfully delicious," Emma purred.

"If I eat another bite of this chocolate cake, I'm gonna gain ten pounds!" said Barbara Allen.

"You only live once sweetie," said her grandmother, reaching for another slice.

"You're right," Barbara laughed. "And if a guy doesn't like how I look-tough cookies!" Then she got another slice.

"Now can we play games?" demanded Gisella.

She flashed Mr. Gold a worshipful smile as she did so, since he had helped bring her assailant to justice.

Belle was getting used to the adoration her husband received now on a daily basis but whether she was bothered by it depended on who was doing the fawning.

She couldn't begrudge Barbara her adoration after what she endured.

And with Barbara, the adoration wasn't really physical attraction but more of a hero-worship . . . since after her experience with Keith, Barbara didn't trust men . . .except for her saviour, Mr. Gold.

And Doctor Hopper.

Archie smiled at his patient. She'd come a long way from that frightened young woman who first came to his office. It took weeks for her to finally be comfortable enough to discuss the cursed Spencer again remembering well how traumatized she'd been when he tried putting her on trial as he did Marie.

"I'm glad that bastard Spencer is gone!" said her grandmother. "Nasty man...trying to do to you what he did to my Barbara!"

"Shoulda turned him and the bad man into bugs an squished em," muttered Gisella.

Rumple couldn't help but agree with her . . .and if this had been their old realm, where justice was of a different, more brutal sort . . .he would have done so . . .once they'd been convicted of their crimes.

"And I'm glad that Zelena is a goat for what she did to my daddy!"

"Amen!" muttered Elmira, who had once been Zelena's tutor in magic.

She had never met a more spoiled, vindictive, envious child in her life . . . and that was saying something, considering who she used to be.

"All right ladies, we have a ton of word games first...baby crosswords, baby word search...baby word scrambles..." Belle announced.

"And what's the prize?" piped up Gisella.

"We have them over in the crib...you get to pick one," answered her mother.

"Ooo goodie!" she clapped her hands. "Will you help me? I can't read so good yet."

"Sure sweetie."

Rumple and Archie handed out copies of each kind of puzzle for the women and Gisella to solve. Then they went to refill the coffee maker and wash some of the dishes while the women were solving the games. The first ones done correctly would win a prize.

"I can't wait to see them do the bottle contest," Archie chuckled.

Rumple also fed Major, though the shepherd seemed full . . . probably because of all the food he'd been given under the table by women cozened by his imploring eyes.

They were going to have a baby bottle drinking race and guess the contents of the diaper.

Then there was Baby 911, with a doll Rumple had enchanted for this game. The women would be in teams nad have to deal with some kind of emergency with the baby, and whoever did the correct thing won a prize . . .besides just calling 911.

One of the last games they would have was an auction where they would bid on surprise gifts and the money would be donated to the Storybrooke Orphanage.

Snow finished hers first and chose a small prize from the crib, a gift card to Mallory's.

They even allowed Gisella to pick out a prize and she found a wool scarf made by Rumple that matched her winter coat.

She was so excited she almost spilled her cup of milk.

"Sella, sweetie, be careful!"

Then Rumple and Archie returned and had each table be a team and have to guess what was in each "dirty" diaper . . .there were melted candy bars in them and whoever got all five right won a prize.

"Ewww...looks like poop in there!" Gisella wrinkled her nose.

"It's not, poppet," Rumple assured her. "But you have to guess what it is. Would you like a hint?"

"Ummm...yeah."

"Okay. It's a what you call a famous candy bar," he whispered in her ear.

"But Uncle Rumple there's lots of em!"

He spread his hands. "Well, pick one. It's also a place you can visit in Pennsylvania."

"Ooh I get it...Hershey!"

Rumple clapped and said, "Write it on your paper, dearie. That's one out of five. Here comes a new one. You can smell it too."

"Okay but if it was real poop I wasn't sticking my nose in it...that's gross!"

"Now would I do that to you?" he mock-frowned at her.

"No..."

"Well, there you go then."

She sniffed the second diaper. "Ummm...is it a Butterfinger?"

"Write it down, and I'll announce what they are at the end," her uncle said.

"Okay."

She moved onto the next one and wrote down what she thought it was, hoping they could read it.

"All right, is everyone done guessing?" Belle asked.

"Yes!" they all chorused.

"Okay...let's see...Rumple...who is our winner?"

"Elmira Gulch!" he announced. "The answers were-Hershey bar, Butterfinger, Reeses peanut butter cup, Mounds, and Pay Day."

"Sounds like someone has been eating a lot of candy again and she shouldn't..." Snow scolded her fellow teacher.

Elmira scoffed. "One once in a while doesn't hurt my pretty."

"It does when you have diabetes, Elmira!"

Her prize was a certificate to the Stoyrbrooke Animal Shelter . . .good for one free adoption. "I hoped you'd win this," Gold confided when he handed her the prize.

"I think I'm ready for another friend now..."

"And there's one waiting for you," he assured her.

She hugged him. "Thank you dear."

"Rumple, ready to explain the next game?' Belle asked her husband.

"Sella, why don't you color us some pages while we do this one?" her mother suggested.

"But I wanna play with the doll!"

"Ummm...it's not to play with for this game, Princess." her father said.

"Awww!" she pouted and stomped her foot.

"Gisella, if I have to start counting you're getting a time out."

"Okay, attention please, ladies!" Rumple called. He began to explain the rules for the Baby 911 game. "Now . . .the doll is enchanted to simulate a real emergency . . .like choking, fever, ect . . . and you get points for identifying the problem and for dealing with it correctly. This is something some of you have already had to deal with or gods forbid may have to one day. So it's also good practice just in case."

"Daddy, that's scary!"

"Now do you see why I said it's not to play with?" Archie asked his daughter.

"Uh-huh."

Of all of them Emma had the most difficulty recognizing some of the problems the baby was having and ended up needing to call 911 most of the time.

When it was over . . .Marie and Granny tied.

"It's a good thing I'm not gonna have a kid anytime soon," the sheriff laughed. "Because the poor thing would be in the hospital more than it was home."

"Now you'll know if you do have one," Marie told her.

"Only if my boyfriend moves his butt and marries me this time."

"Speaking of boyfriends moving their butts and marrying their girlfriends..." Mrs. Muffet began and soon all eyes were on Archie. "What are you waiting for Doctor?"

"Yes, you already live together and though you don't share a bed...you should get married soon or tongues will wag," scolded the baroness.

"Umm . .. I know that," Archie blushed. "I'm . . .um . . . working on it."

"Rumple...smack some sense into this boy!" ordered Mrs. Allen.

Smirking, Rumple cuffed his future brother-in-law on the back of the head." That good, dearie? Or you want Belle to get her broom?"

"We should just elope!" grumbled Marie.

"You will NOT!" cried Belle.

"What's elope mean, Mommy?"

"A quickie, secret wedding."

"Why would you wanna do that?"

Because I doubt anyone besides family will be there, Marie thought sadly.

"Never mind...let's start the next game...the baby bottle drinking contest and you can do this one, Sella."

"Yay!" Gisella said.

"Okay, here are the rules: you have to fill your bottles up to the eight ounce line with water and drink them like a baby would...no squeezing the bottle and no biting the nipple. First one done wins," Belle explained. Then she handed bottles to Rumple and Archie. "You have to play too."

"Ready, Hopper?" Rumple grinned challengingly.

'You think I can't do it? Watch me."

"Ready...get set...GO!" Belle shouted.

Rumple began sucking away, and the water was going down fast.

"Come on Sella !" Marie cheered. "Come on Archie!"

"Leave them in the dust Rumple!" Belle encouraged.

Rumple almost had the bottle finished, sucking hard on it. But others were very close too.

"Done!" Emma announced holding up her bottle.

"Drat!" Rumple sighed, he'd come in second.

"Aww crap I was close!" whined Gisella.

"All right Emma, pick your prize."

The sheriff rooted through the gifts in the crib and took out a large box. In it was a coffee maker, one she desperately needed for the station since theirs was broken.

The last game was the auction . . .with the surprise gifts.

Belle and Rumple labeled each package giving vague hints as to what was inside and several of them were prank gifts like a pack of toilet paper.

It took everything they had to laugh when Archie won the bid at sixty dollars for the toilet paper.

"A good way to keep clean...funny one, Rum," he muttered.

Gisella giggled. "You bought toilet paper, Daddy!"

"I know, princess, but it's for a good cause . . ." he laughed.

"Well I can cross that off the shopping list," Marie said.

"A whoopie cushion? Really Rumple?"Emma asked.

"You can play tricks on Jeff," he smirked.

"This tea set is lovely," remarked Elmira.

"So is this Ninja blender," Barbara said.

"Are you gonna open your gifts now Aunt Belle?"

"Yes," Belle said, and went to sit down in the "throne of honor"-a recliner Rumple had brought out so she could put her feet up.

Marie handed her Regina's gift first since she was not at the baby shower. The young mother to be opened it and was stunned to see a christening gown inside.

"Ohhh...Rumple...look!" she gasped.

Rumple examined the tiny gown of silk and satin with seed pearls sewn into it and a lace cap. "It's beautiful, Belle. The one who made this was a master."

"Here's a note. 'Belle, he may not remember this but Rumple made this for me when I was a baby but my mother refused to use it...wanted to throw it away but my father saved it. Now I return it to him. It's only fitting his own child should wear it...Regina.'" she read.

Rumple's hands caressed the gown . . .and he remembered then. He had spent painstaking hours sewing this, using special sharp needles to sew the silk and the pearls on with gold thread he'd spun. There were even matching little booties.

"I didn't know you made a christening gown for her," Belle said to him.

"Yes . . .because even though I disliked Cora with a passion . . .her daughter was only a wee baby . . .and I did like Henry."

"It doesn't surprise me Cora wanted to throw away something so beautiful...as long as it wasn't hers it didn't matter,' mumbled Elmira.

"Well . . .now it's come full circle . . . " Rumple mused and thought how strange were the workings of fate.

"This one is from David and me," announced Snow.

Belle opened the box to reveal a plush rocking horse, complete with a comeable mane and tail and a real leather saddle and bridle. The rocking horse had a special infant seat you could attach to it to rock a baby until the baby was old enough to sit on it and rock itself.

"Very nice, dearie" Rumple said, chuckling. "It would have to do with horses, knowing your husband."

"This next one is from me dears," announced Elmira. The former wicked witch bought a large plush lion that looked like the cowardly lion from the Wizard of Oz.

"Oh! How lovely!" Belle exclaimed. Barbara gave them a lovely layette set and also a bunch of books for the baby's library . . . "Because if this little one's anything like it's mama it'll come out born reading."

Archie, Marie and Gisella bought them onesies with funny saying on them. One said I'm Cute and So Is My Daddy and another said Mommy's Little Bookworm with a picture of a worm with glasses holding a book on it.

Mrs. Muffet had chipped in with her good friend Pat Allen and the two had bought a four in one stroller/infant car seat . . .complete with soft baby toys.

Emma had gotten them a diaper bag with everything they could possibly need inside it . . .including a book called Baby 411. And a little shirt that said Just a Cute Little Bundle of Trouble with Lady and the Tramp on it and matching socks.

Granny and Ruby's gift was a mobile with roses and spinning wheels on it made by Geppetto.

Everyone oohed and ahhed over that.

The baroness's gift was a set of rattles and pacifiers.

Others gave gifts of feeding dishes, bottles, a bathing sponge and bath toys, lots of clothes, a diaper pail, burpees, and other things a baby might need.

Rumple's gift was all the nursery furniture . . . save for the crib, which was from Maurice.

"Everything is wonderful, thank you all so much!" Belle wiped tears from her eyes.

"That's from me, Mama," Bae announced, coming into the backyard with Andi.

Andi held a small wrapped package in her hands.

"Bae! Where did you . . .how did you get the money to pay for this?" Belle sputtered.

"Uh . . . I worked afternoons for a lot of people around here, and in Papa's shop." Bae said.

"What is it Belle?" Marie asked.

It was a baby cradle hand carved by August. . .with a painted headboard of a sheep jumping over the moon. "That's my painting. I thought it needed something."

"It's beautiful..." Belle sobbed and hugged her son.

"And this is from me and Mark," Andi handed her the package. Inside was a beautiful appliquéd bib with a blue butterfly on it and the words "Love is hope, and here's a miracle." "Umm . . . I made it. One thing I still remember how to do that my mama taught me is to embroider." The girl said shyly.

"It's perfect Andi. Thank you..."

Rumple took it to examine it and said, "Yes. Excellent stitching here. Very fine and neat. You had a good teacher, lass."

"My mama was the best with a needle,' Andi said softly, remembering her patient gentle mother sewing on tapestries and clothing in their castle. "I'm not half as good."

Marie and Archie started cleaning everything up and the guests began to leave, Rumple telling them to make sure they took some of the food home as he didn't want it to go to waste.

Gisella handed out the favors to everyone.

Bae showed Rumple the six large trout he'd caught in the lake. Andi had caught three. All the fish had been cleaned and filleted by the teenagers.

"Well, we know what we're having for dinner tonight!" Belle said with a laugh.

"We're going to head home, Belle," Marie said.

Belle hugged her sister, niece, and almost brother-in-law. "Thanks for helping with everything. We couldn't have done it without you."

"Family helps family," Archie said repeating Rumple's words.

"Now if you would make it official..."

"Ummmm...about that...the reason why Marie and I are having such a hard time trying to set a date is...ah...our theme is a bit...unique."

Rumple cocked his head. "What is it?"

"We want to have a Greek wedding...he always calls me his goddess and I call him my Adonis...and we both love mythology," Marie explained.

"I know...crazy...maybe we're better off having a simple ceremony."

And he knew there were still people in town who doubted he and Marie would last.

Marie picked up Gisella who was starting to tire and needed a nap or she would be cranky.

Belle frowned. Of all of them, her poor sister seemed to be having the hardest time getting her happily ever after. She knew Marie wouldn't completely feel secure until she was married to Archie.

And she lay the blame for it at the feet of Cora and Gaston.

"We'll talk about it when we get home," Marie said softly.

"Call me if you need me," Belle said and hugged her again.

"I will."

Gisella had fallen asleep before they got back to the house. Archie carefully lifted her out of the backseat and carried her inside. Pongo started barking as soon as they walked in the door.

"Pongo…sit," he commanded gently. The Dalmatian returned to his spot on the rug and rested his head on his paws.

Gisella stirred for a moment. "Daddy….where we goin'?" she asked sleepily.

"You are going to bed, Princess."

"Not sleepy," she protested then closed her eyes again. Marie went upstairs ahead of him to get Gisella's pajamas ready for when he brought her in. Together they changed their sleeping daughter and tucked her into bed, each kissing her small cheek. Archie gently lifted her arm and placed Rose under it before he stepped out into the hallway. He wasn't tired and planned on watching a movie hoping Marie would join him but some nights she preferred to stay in her room and read. He was learning quickly that sometimes lovers needed their own space for a time or they became irritated with each other.

He started down the stairs when he heard Marie behind him. "Going to watch a movie?" she asked softly.

"Yes. You don't have to join me if you're not up to it."

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You were a little upset after we mentioned the wedding."

"We do need to talk about that but not right now. Just give me a few minutes."

"All right."

He hoped she wasn't planning on putting it off too long.