Disclaimer: We don't own Skins, that would make us rich and I don't know about Harley, but I'm not rich.

Author Note: Thank you to everyone who reads and has reviewed this fic, we really appreciate all of your comments/feedback and the fact you're reading is really good. After chapter ten we'll be taking a break as me (Miss Peg) will be away most of July but we'll be back with the second half of the story in early-mid August!

Growing Pains

Chapter Nine: Cook

"Yeah, boy! Come on, dance with me, babe!" Cook cries over the music, the brunette girl jumping up and down beside him, his arms finds its way around her neck and pulls her closer to his chest and he places a kiss against her cheek and winks at her suggestively. She nods and lets herself be dragged off the dance floor and out into the club alley way. He fucks her then and there and then tells her to get to fuck seconds after, just because he can and because he wants to. He likes the power. When he heads back he spots the lovely Fitch twins sitting in a corner booth laughing at each other, Katie glances over to him in disgust and he sighs, he can never fucking please her. At least Emily isn't mad at him anymore. His eyes drift over to the other redhead, he notices the stony expression on her face and watches as she glances over in a certain direction every couple of seconds. He follows her gaze and smirks, he ain't stupid, its funny actually. He moves over to his table and throws himself down next to the blonde, wrapping his arm around his shoulder. "Naomikins! Someone's been keeping a secret. Now, blondie didn't anyone ever tell you that its rude to keep secrets from your mates?" He smirks at her and she stares back clueless at him.

"What the fuck are you talking about, James?" He leans towards JJ and smirks.

"Jkins, can you go get us a beer, please mate?" Holds out a note towards the curly haired boy and he nods, sensing that this conversation even though Cook is making it seem simple, really isn't. JJ goes to get the beer and Cook moves round to the other side of the booth.

"Fuck her then, did you?"

"What?" The venom in her voice is strong. Very fucking strong and if Cook wasn't used to it by now he would've run for the fucking hills.

"Calm it, Blondie, I'm only being nice. Now, you fucked Emily, didn't you?" He smirks again and Naomi's eyes bulge.

"Piss off, James."

"That's all the answer I need."

"I didn't give you one."

"Exactly."

"Stay out of my life, Cook!" When she says Cook that means she's angry at him so he decides to play it safe and back off a little.

"Okay, Naomikins, how's your mum, then? Still with that Kieran bloke?" He pats his pockets and sighs, shit, he's out. "You got any fags, I'm out."

"Scrounger, you are, James." She opens her bag and throws him a pack, he catches and grabs one, handing it back to her. "Yeah, she is."

" Cheers. Let me know when she's single, yeah? I have a thing for Campbell's," He winks and she scowls back at him. "Best occupation to have, by the way, you don't have to do anything."

He laughs. "I ain't lazy, Naomikins, I just choose not to do, you see? If I don't have to, then why should I?"

"If you want to be a bum, James, that's your choice."

"Hey! I ain't a fucking bum, I have a very lucrative drug business that keeps me afloat."

"Ain't been pushing much of it lately, though, have you? River dry now?"

"Nah, just playing it safe. Letting Thomas cut me in. Don't want to get too much attention otherwise I'll be getting questions from the fucking pigs. Anyway, enough bout me, blondie, let's talking about you?"

"Piss off, I don't wanna talk about it!"

"I know you don't, but I fucking do so let's say that you be the one to compromise because you know how fucking stubborn I am. I'll pester you all night if I have to Naomikins, want me to do that?"

"You do anyway, on a regular basis!" He claps and laughs.

"You're so fucking funny. So how was she? Good?"

"What!"

"I'm asking if you'd wanna wet your fingers again."

"You're fucking vile, James, you know that?"

"I never said I wasn't," He blows a kiss at her. Looks over at Emily and smiles. "She's looking at you." Naomi's head snaps round and looks at Emily who is staring right back, the redhead eyes widen and she turns back round.

"Fuck." Naomi whispers under her breath.

"Enough bullshit, the real question I want the answer to is why you ain't sitting over there next to her playing happy fucking families?"

"She did a runner."

"Ah. Well, Naomikins, that's shit. I'm sorry, yeah? But look at it this way, I've been watching those two for most of the night and every couple of minutes Emilio over there has looked your way. She fucking ran, but she's not run too far, blondie," he reaches across the table and uses his thumb to lift her head up to look at him. "Chin up, lezzer, you'll get some again."

Naomi sighs. "For a second there I thought you were going to be nice."

"Hey, that was nice!" He winks. "Two seconds, Naomikins, I've gotta go see a redhead about a blowjob that she's still in denial about." She watches as Cook hops to his feet and makes his way over towards the Fitch twins. "Katiekins!" Cook bellows as he arrives and Naomi rolls her eyes. Typical Cook. It takes a couple of minutes before Katie slaps Cook and he gives her the finger, heading back over to the blonde.

"She's still in denial, then?"

"Stupid bint, missing out she is." He grumbles.

"Too right." Naomi replies.

"Says I ain't good enough for her. That I'm not a gentleman. Fuck her, I don't care." Naomi looks at him knowingly. The song in the club changes to a slow one and Cook smiles a plan hatching in his head, getting up he holds out his hand. "Can I have this dance, Naomikins?"

"Can you fuck!" She snaps and stays sitting in her seat. He rolls his eyes and grabs her drink. "Hey! I was fucking drinking that!" He downs it.

"Well, you're not now. Get on your feet and dance with me, blondie. Chance two show those to bints how fucking good we are. No point moping, easier to get hurt that way. Come on, blondie, dance with me."

"Fine." He smirks and pulls her out of the seat. "You owe me a drink, though."

"Fair enough, fair enough."

"We don't know how it happened Mister...errr..."

"Cook."

"Yes, Mister Cook, but it did. You're mother seems to have awoken from her coma and is very responsive. You should be very happy indeed."

"She's...She's fuckin' awake?" Cook gawks and the doctor nods slowly, ignoring the use of Cook's language.

"Yes, she's awake right now. Would you like to see her?"

"Yeah, I'd like to bloody see her." The doctor opens the door and leads him down the corridor to his mother's room. He glances into Doris's room on the way and gives her a little wave.

"Come see me later, Cookie. I've got some stories to tell ya!" She calls.

"Will do, Doris!" He calls back and pushes open the door to his mother's room. Smiles widely when he sees her moving in the bed, he doesn't know how but seconds later he's kneeling beside her bed, hugging her. He's not usually one for cliché moments but he fucking loves his mum.

"James." She says fondly into his shoulder and his grip on her tightens.

"You're fucking awake! Ha ha!" He cries happily and pulls back to kiss her on the forehead before pulling her back into another vicelike hug. "How?" The doctor is smiling next to him.

"It seems that the treatment has worked and your mother is due to make a full recovery. We will monitor her closely and make sure that everything is normal but it looks like you'll make a full recovery Mrs Cook." She smiles at the doctor broadly. "I'll let you and your son have some alone time." He politely steps out of the room. Cook's mum's smile drops and she looks pleadingly at her son.

"Tell me you've got a fucking fag."

"Sure thing, Mum." He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a pack of fags, holds them out to her and she takes two, hides one in the mattress under her bed and then holds her hand out for his lighter as well. She sparks up and lies back sighing happily as the smoke fills her lungs.

"Best fucking thing in the world." She mutters to herself and Cook smirks.

"You used to say that about me."

"You used to be a nice little boy." She smiles and he laughs.

"How times have changed."

"Indeed. Speaking of time, James. What the fuck has happened?"

"Alot. A fucking lot." Silence.

"Well, you better tell me everything then, son." He rolls his eyes and then shifts forward telling his mum everything. After he's finish he shifts back in his chair and sparking up his own fag, offering her another she takes it and smiles thankfully.

"You're a good son," he smiles. He'll never tell her but he's missed her so fucking much. When she first fell into her coma he was lost, not because he relied on her but because he fucking needed her. He was only sixteen at the time and he'd lost his mum and had to look after his little brother Paddy. Paddy stayed with their Aunt for all this time and he had to make do, did whatever he had to make sure that he and his mum were fine because everyone might think he was scum, but he wasn't going to let his mum get shit treatment. He's not into the soppy shit, he's an action man, not words so he just sits back and listens to her rabid on about anything because well...he's fucking missed her.

"So, Paddy's fine with Karen?"

"Yeah, I go see him now and then. He'll be so happy you're awake. He keeps wanting me to bring him here, I'll go get him tomorrow."

"Good." She smiles. "And how's your life, James? Got a job?"

"Just a little secret between us, Mum, but I've got a job interview tomorrow at some bank. Top notch and stuff, wouldn't usually get an interview but I know a guy who works there that hooked it up for me. Don't wanna tell my mates yet, not till it's happened. Gonna try and sort it out, mum, yeah? No more pushing drugs or any of that shit. Too dangerous, I've got youse and Paddy to look after now and I ain't gonna mess it up...nah...ain't gonna mess it up this time."

"You're growing up, James. You'll make me proud. Now, have you got something to wear to this job interview then? Something nice?"

"Errrr gonna see if Keith can lend me something I think."

"What that old smelly git? You don't want anything he gives you to wear. Let me sort you something out. I'll get them to look through all my stuff and find it for you. Come back tomorrow and I'll have it, Okay? Visiting hours are nearly over so I think it's time for you to leave. Don't want them to kick off now, do you?"

"Suppose so, I'll be back tomorrow, yeah?" He leans over and presses a kiss to her head. "I fucking love you mum."

"Love you too, James." He smiles, doesn't smirk. Not at his mum and heads for the doors, strutting happily down the dimly lit corridors and out into reception.

"How's mum Cook?" JJ calls from behind the desk and Cook laughs ecstatically and turns towards the curly haired boy. "Jkins! I fucking love you, man!" Reaching over the desk he grabs the boy and hugs him. "She's dandy man, she's only woken up!"

"Oh! Wow, that's great Cook! I'm happy for you."

"Man, life is quality at the moment. Fucking nothing can go wrong."

The first sign of a bad day is something little, something random. Cook closes his door to his dorm and walks down the hallway, down the stairs and out onto the streets of Bristol. "Ah! What the fuck?" He cries in pain as something metal pushes into his foot. He hops around for a bit and then leans back against a metal rail so he can get a better look, a nail is sticking out of the shoe and blood is around the top, he clenches his jaw before pulling it out slowly, biting his lip at the end of it. Only the tip went in but it still fucking kills. So he heads back up to his dorm, needs a fucking plaster.

"Hi, I'm here to see Mrs Cook." The man leans on the desk and smiles at JJ.

"Are you a relative?"

"Yeah."

"What are you to the patient?"

"Husband."

"So, you're Mister Cook, are you? Haven't come to visit before, have you? Well, I suppose you would now."

"Why would I now?"

"Cuz she's woken up, ain't she?"

"Oh..."The man replies puzzled. "She's awake?"

"Yeah, don't sound too fucking ecstatic. Fucking men." The woman mutters under her breath and then slips a form towards him. "Sign that and then I'll take you to her."

"Sure." He smiles and picks up the pen, signing in.

The second sign you're having a bad day is when something mild happens. His foot is fucking killing him, he's stuck a plaster on it and hoping for the best. He hasn't got time to sit and bitch about a cut because it's the day of his interview at the bank. New start. Fresh start. He's fed up of being bad, bad's alright for a while and then before you know it you're bored, so fucking bored of the same thing over and over again. Don't get him wrong though it's not like he's never gonna do drugs or drink or fuck again, because he's still going to do that, every fucking night. He just wants something honest in his life, something good. "Watch out prick!" He calls after a man bundles into him, making him put pressure on his foot and groan in pain. Fucking prick. There's no way he's gonna be on time for his interview with this foot, fuck it. He reaches for his phone in his jacket and panics. It's not fucking there. Shit! Fuck! Bollocks! He turns and tries to chase after the retreating figure of the guy but his foot aches in pain. "FUCK!" he cries out in the middle of the street and people move away from him. Fuck sake, this is not his day.

"James?" Mrs Cook calls out from the bed as the door creaks open and she smiles, the smiles drops however when someone else walks into the room that isn't her son. "Who the fuck are you?"

"I see I'm in the right room." He pulls up a chair and sits down on it in front of her.

"Who the fuck are you?" She asks again.

"My names Bryant, Mrs Cook, and I've come to see you about your son." Realisation dawns on her face. James. What the fuck has he done now?

"Why?"

"Well, you see your son is a thief. Your son stole something that belongs to me Mrs Cook and I want it back."

"What is it? Is it money?" Silence. "It is! It's fucking money, I'll pay it back, okay? Just leave him alone."

"Ah, a loving mother," he shifts closer and looms over the bedridden woman. "Touching really, it's hard to find that these days. All these teenage mothers don't know how to look after their kids but the older ones, the wiser ones, they do! They know what sacrifice is, giving up their lives so that their kids can have a future, have a chance, judging from the look of you, must have been early twenties when you gave birth to your son, right?"

"Yeah." She replies hesitantly.

"You gave up the best years of your life for him! Imagine what you could've done if you hadn't had a kid, how much more fun you could've had. You could've lived. But that just shows how devoted you are. So, the question is how devoted are you? Are you willing to pay for your son?"

"What the fuck are you talking about! Seriously! Are you mental or something because I have no idea at all what you're talking about!"

"Your son needs to learn a lesson, a hard lesson, that there are consequences for his actions and when he chose to act and steal from me that there would be big consequences." Bryant moves quickly and grabs the pillow from under Mrs Cook's head and slams it down on her face, smothering her. Grabbing the emergency button away from her, he presses down hard, her body writhing.

The third sign you're having a bad day is something big. Loss. He stares blankly at the wall over his mothers bed, hardly blinking, hardly breathing. His chest hurts so fucking much. He can't think though either, the air around him is heating up and all he wants to do is lie right there on the floor in front of everyone and curl himself into a ball, he can't do that though, can't do anything, he doesn't even think he can move. "Son? Son? Are you okay, son?" Cook's head slowly turns towards him, stares at the doctor with a vacant expression. "Everything will be fine, son. I promise. She'll be taken care of." He feels something unfamiliar on his shoulder and his eyes snap towards it, it's the doctors hand squeezing his shoulder reassuringly, he doesn't feel it. Doesn't feel much of anything. "We'll just leave you to it." The doctors are gone when he finally decides to blink and he is left all alone in a room with his mum. His eyes travel over everything as he stands on the same spot, unmoving. Finally when he moves towards the bed and his eyes travel down to his mums face, he can only look a second before it becomes too much and he has to look away because he can't stand it. Loss.

He glances at the table next to his mum's bed. There's a plastic sheet and something inside it, a note on the top. He reaches down a slowly runs his finger tips over it and stares for a minute. One whole minute before he finally reads the words. 'This was your grandfathers. Make me proud, James' are written in his mum's handwriting. He lifts up the sheet and sees a suit underneath it. He stares blankly at it before pulling his shirt over his head and picking up the tie.

When he walks back out of her room he is wearing the suit.

"So, what qualifications did you say you had again?" He's not really been listening, just sitting there staring out the window behind the bald man in a suit sitting at the desk in front of him.

"Three GCSE's." Cook replies quietly.

"In?"

"P.E, Drama and Biology."

"And what grades did you achieve?"

"Two A's and a B."

"And what about A levels?"

"No."

"You have none?"

"No." The guy leans forward and takes off his glasses, pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs heavily.

"Why do they let you people in here? We have a strict policy on qualifications here and we don't need worthless people like you in here wasting our time!"

"Sorry." Cook replies and continues to stare out of the window in front of him.

"You bet your arse you're sorry!" The man stands now throwing the file in front of him down on the desk. "You come in here in some cheap suit that you can barely wear, you tell me you have no qualifications, nothing of value to us and you stare out of the window the whole bloody interview." He moves round the desk and walks over to Cook, bends down. "Now you look at me boy." Cook doesn't. "I said fucking look at me!" Cook's head slowly moves to look at the man. "You'll never be anything, you hear me? You are worthless. Scum. No dreams are coming true for you. Now, fuck off you failure."

Rain. He feels it hard on his back as he slowly walks away from the bank. It's all a blur, he doesn't remember much. No images just the words. Failure. Scum. Worthless. All floating around in his head. He shakes his head and pushes on through the rain. His suit is soaked by the time he reaches the club; he'd planned to meet Naomi and JJ. He walks in and sits down in the booth next to them. Says hi to them as they say it to him. Sounds are drowned out to him, he can't hear the beat of the drums, he can't hear JJ and Naomi's conversation, he can't hear anything. He watches as JJ gestures at Naomi and she laughs in return, can't here the laugh though. Numb. He's so fucking numb. "Cook, are you okay?" JJ asks and pushes him slightly.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm fine, JJ." He says with a shake of his head. "I'm just...just gonna get a drink." Naomi looks at him curiously as he shuffles passed her and out of the booth.

"What the fuck is wrong with him?" She asks.

"No idea." JJ replies. They watch as Cook walks towards the crowd of moving people. The first bloke nudges him to the right and he lets his body go that way. A girl accidently bumps him to the left and he falls straight into Katie's arms, knocking the drink from her hands. "What the fuck, Cook!" she screams in his face. He doesn't flinch, doesn't respond.

"Sorry." He mummers in her ear and then he pushes away from her and heads towards the bar again only to have Katie grab his arm and pull back. Annoying. "Hey! Don't just fucking knock my drink out of my hand and piss off! I want another one Cook! Cook...Cook...Cook? You're fucking out of it, aren't you?" She snaps her fingers in front of his face.

"Nah...just gotta..." he turns and heads towards the bar again. He needs a drink, his throat is so dry. He needs the burn. The burn always helps. Tonight he can drink because tomorrow, tomorrow it becomes real. Very fucking real and he doesn't like real.

"Cook! You're a piece of shit Cook!" Katie calls desperately having no idea how to act. He doesn't react. He is. When he finally reaches the bar he orders a shot of vodka and downs in it one. Asks for a beer next and takes it back out to the middle of the dance floor with him, stands in the middle of the bodies, unmoving against the moving. Silence, it's the most precious thing in the fucking world, he thinks as he raises his head towards the ceiling and breathes heavily. "Cook! How are you my man? How's business? How is your mother? Good I hope." Thomas asks cheerfully and places a hand on Cook's shoulder. The last straw. Rage, the purest thing he's ever felt, his body moves on his own, his fist snapping into Thomas's face with blind rage. He follows the boy down. Punch. The whole club comes to a standstill the music turns off and a crowd forms around them.

You're a piece of shit.

Punch.

Worthless.

Punch.

Pathetic.

Punch.

A failure.

Punch.

Scum.

Punch.

Make me proud, son.

The most heart wrenching cry fills the room as he opens his mouth and cries out in anger. The pain it's so much. He can't bottle it up any more. It's not just one cry, it's lots. Over and over and over until he can't cry anymore and all he can do is sob into Thomas's body. "I'm sorry, I'm so fucking sorry, mum. I tried. I tried to make you proud."

xxx

Next Chapter is Everyone! Please review!