Heya guys! I know it took me a little while to upload, I'm sorry I'm sick. So that kinda sucks. I gladly want to hear your opninions about the story, so don't forget to review...!
Jacob's Point of View.
All my life I had waited for this moment. The moment I could kiss her, I prepared myself for being the big brother and her friend for years. Support her through all her harsh times and comfort her when she had a bruised knee. I could never imagine that after five years I would be kissing her. But the moment was there and it just happened. I pulled her near and pressed my lips on hers. Her lips were warm and soft, just like I had imagined. No it was better than I had imagined. She tasted like vanilla, that I never imagined.
It was perfect.
Until
Suddenly images of an other boy invaded my mind. Pictures of Renesmee kissing him instead of me. It was right on the moment Alice started to scream that we parted up.
"Ness…" I started. I felt hurt and awesome at the same time. My heart wanted to jump right out of my chest of joy, to crumble and break of despair at the same time. It was so awesome that we kissed but I didn't understand why she send me that pictures. It already had been horrible to see her enter that boy, holding hands with him. Ofcourse I knew something more happened, but seeing it so right before my eyes was a little bit too much. I could feel how my body started to tremble and suddenly I wanted to shout at her, shake her and beg her to don't ever do that again. Ask her why she did that, why she just couldn't enjoy our kiss, Ask her to don't do it ever again. But before I could say a word Edward stormed in. Ofcourse he did.
With anxious eyes he overlooked the room. But there was nothing there, Just Renesmee and me. There were no treats, no people who tried to take her away or hurt her. So he eased, I could see it at his body language, his tensed shoulders relaxed and his clutched fists did the same. The teeth he was showing vanished behind his lips and his eyes eased lightened up.
Until
He read in my mind about our kiss. His teeth immediately showed again and his eyes went from troubled to furious.
"YOU DID WHAT?" He hissed through his clutched teeth, he shared my trembling, my anger and most of all my frustration.
"Mind your own business leech" I growled towards him. Letting the anger swell over me, my temper got the best of me. The pictures of 'patrick' and his interruption completely ruined my mood. I knew I should be in cloud nine, pink clouds everywhere and a huge smile plastered on my face. But I wasn't, I just had a trip straight to hell.
Jaspers Point of view.
When I stormed in the unease in the air made me stop dead in my tracks. The tension between my brother and Jacob would be noticeable even if I was a human. I wondered what was going on, but my first priority was Renesmee. Our little girl, which was so brave and stubborn at the same time. I shot her a calming wave, but somehow she didn't needed it. She seemed to be perfectly fine, she looked at Edward before she lowered her eyes at Jacob. Repeating the same ritual a few times,. Even though her pupils were wide and her teeth sunken in the flesh of her lip I could see the rhythmic pulse through her veins. I could hear her raced heartbeat, which seemed normal. The pooling of blood in her cheeks and her sweet scent that was mixed with the inviting smell of her blood. It hit me like a train, slamming me out of my reality. It was a several years now that I was completely fair towards my diet. But this smell was the most delicious smell that I ever noticed. My throat arched and the thirst ran through it like it was on fire. My muscles arched ready to jump on her, I couldn't help but imagine how I would leap up to her, slowly lowered my body like I was going to whisper in her ear. But instead letting my lips touch the arch her throat, how I would sank my teeth into her porcelain skin, letting the hot pulse under my lips slowly fade. Make her heart stop beating.
Our little girl.
Thirst.
Monster.
Kill.
The next second I did, I jumped forwards ready to take. Take what I craved for so long, she wouldn't even have time to scream.
Renesmee's Point of View.
Was I really such a bad kisser? Jacobs troubled eyes when we parted up made me feel a little weird. When someone screamed downstairs the bronze haired man that they called my father stormed in. I shook out my thick mahogany hair while I begged to the greater gods for some privacy. I tried to hide the blush on my face with my hair as I shifted my weight, I was feeling uncomfortable and pulled loose from Jacobs arms. I sat down on the head of my bed and was suddenly thankful that he was so big. When my skin met the tension in the air the only thing I wanted to do was hide, I didn't understand why those people seemed to hate each other so much, Also it was unclear for me why they both thought they could claim me somehow. They were throwing insults at each other and I looked from Edward to Jacob. I was surprised by this sudden turn of inhuman intercourse. Then the blonde one stormed in but stopped in his tracks. His eyes flashed over us and his eyes grew bigger when he looked at me. First I wanted to raise my eyes on the other man again, but there was something off about his eyes. While he stared at me his pupils grew bigger and suddenly several feelings overwhelmed me.
Greed
Excitement
Pain
Fear
That linked to the look in his eyes made a voice in my head scream: RUN, run so fast as you can. Both my sides were completely homophonic, so they drove me through the room, heading for the window. I knew if I landed bad my ankle would kill me, but that was later concern now. The beating of my heart and the shot of adrenaline that run through my body were the only things that flashed through my mind, I clutched my hands into fists while I the glass shattered around me. For a second I leaped into cold air praying that I would make it. It was unfamiliar territory for me, but he knew this as the back off his hand. No escape routes here, just fear and the need to escape. The ground was coming closer and closer as I prepared for the fall, wondering why he wasn't here yet. Did I really had a chance against him? Maybe Jacob would hold him off for a while giving me the precious second for a fair chance. But before I felt the earth under my bare feet someone snatched me out of thin air. His arms enclosed me while the icecold feeling on my skin made the same voice in my mind scream anxiously. But it was over, the grip he had on me was unbreakable. It was only a matter of time now, it was over. I waited for it, but the arms seemed to never let me go, pressing my face into a solid chest. We were moving, even though I couldn't move I noticed we were running. Maybe we were trying to escape from the others because he didn't liked to share. Because there wasn't enough for him then.
"Daddy, please stop it hurts" I whispered barely hearable. But his super sensitive ears picked it up anyway. I could feel how his teeth departed from my flesh. The blood spread over my shoulder slowly, tracing a warm scarlet line. I tried to stand up while I grabbed my shoulder with my other arm, I could barely feel it anymore. I was feeling lightheaded as my knees gave in, the world that seemed to spin around me made me sick. As I dropped down I cursed my human side, the blood that pumped through my veins and my beating heart. I would be so much easier to have a dead heart, not able to feel anything. Not to have to experience all this feelings, all this pain and humiliation.
I snapped out of my memory when rays of light entered my eyes again. Quickly I blinked a few times when the icecold arms lowered me slowly.
"You?" I exclaimed surprised while I raised my eyes to Emmett. Other cold hands were on me, running over me making sure I was okay. His puppy eyes looked worried. I turned around and saw the Blonde with a chagrin look on her face staring at us. I shrugged Emmett off and folded my arms while I stepped back. Were they going to eat me too?
"Are you okay?" Her always so arrogant icecold voice asked warmly now. I only had enough self control to nod while her topaz eyes inspected me. She and Emmett exchanged a apprehensive glance as they started to mumble so soft it was impossible for my ears to catch up. I could hear they say something like 'Alice', 'Vision' and 'Dog' I just let my thoughts run freely through my mind while I started to hug myself. The cold wind seemed to drill in every cell of my body, my heart was beating so fast it was inhuman. My body was still tensed as I breathed in the cold air, filling my lunges with the oxygen, stopping me from beating myself up. As I focused on just that , giving myself a simple task, I calmed a little bit.
Then a small silver wolf stepped into my eyesight. Even though I wasn't scared of it I backed up a little. Being careful was my first priority right now, so with curious eyes I watched her phase back into a human again. As she stood before us naked and looking fragile I knew this person was still extremely dangerous.
"Rosalie, Emmett. This is our territory you both know it's against the rules to come here" Her voice was full of hatred and eventhough it was fixed on Emmett and Rosalie I could still feel a shiver down my spine. I noticed she hadn't been the only wolf there were five more, bigger and all with sharp showed teeth. I could hear the rumble of their growling as the girl approached Rosalie and Emmett.
"We're sorry Leah, but something went wrong with Jasper and we had to get Renesmee out of there" Emmett said while he restrained Rosalie who looked like she was about to snap at her.
"Well that's a surprise isn't it" Leah answered coldly, Rosalie let out a snarl as Emmett clapped his hand before her mouth. All eyes were on Rosalie right now, so this was my perfect opportunity to escape. Quietly I backed up placing my feet softly on the ground. My heartbeat wasn't a problem because I was already racing when we came here, there were no mind readers here so this just had to work. When I took my last steps freedom was already hugging me, relieving me from this weird situation. I turned around and ran right into the arms of.. Seth. With an evil grin he grabbed me locking me in his big arms. I let out a frustrated snarl as he forced me to walk forward again.
"And where is our princess going?" He asked with amusement in his voice. And while they were arguing I tried to struggle away from Seth's arms. But even with all my strength I was a piece of cake for him. His warm bare chest pressed against my sore back, thank god he was wearing jeans. I couldn't cope with a naked boy holding me. I had my boundaries. They started arguing again and I let my thoughts doze off. I played their game but the rules seemed to change everyday, I tried the best I could. But suddenly I felt too young for this, suddenly I wished I could be a little girl whose only worries were if Santa thought that you behaved well enough to get presents. I just wanted my mom for now, I wanted to hide in her arms and never come out. I didn't wanted to deal with an Edward who claimed he was my father, I didn't wanted to deal with a Jacob who kissed me, or an Emmett who embarrassed me, I remember when my days revolved around simple things, when Jane accused me from losing my mind when I tried to beat Alec with a game of chess. Everyday a new opportunity, and after a whole year I succeeded playing him check mate. It were simple things that didn't had anything to do with killing, loss and hurt. When my list of traitors only included one person; my mom, but now I met these dark twisted games I wasn't impressed by anything anymore. When I was younger I had faced the world with an blind kind of optimism, now it turned into pessimism. I wondered what I did to even deserve this, the only thing I could come up was being born. When Seth lifted me up in his arms I didn't question him, I just let him go. Rosalie and Emmett both touched my cheek, I didn't reacted. They were experts in making me feel miserable, and again they succeeded.
Jacob's Point of View.
As Carlisle stitched up my arm I raised my eyes at Esme. She was pacing through the room restless, she was pacing so hard I wondered if the floor would fall through. When she sighed I recognized the look on her face. It was the same sigh she let out when we let Renesmee slip through our fingers. The same sigh she let out when she couldn't sooth Bella and couldn't do anything for Edward to make him feel a little better. It was a sad sigh which carried the burden of feeling bad for everyone. Momma leech was sad that things had turned out this way. I knew she hoped Renesmee would quickly remember and that they were one happy family again, instead of the broken one they were now. I felt quite sorry for her, she always tried so hard but things just didn't worked out as they should. My mood was completely horrible at the moment, even though I felt sorry for them. I felt sorry for myself too, I was feeling miserable and a little bit shaken. I knew Jasper, Alice and Edward were feeling even worse. They were blaming themselves for the turn that reality had made just now, Edward for not reading it in his mind. Alice for not seeing it sooner even though it all worked out. Only Jaspers feelings were hurt. Shame and self-hatred were filling his heart right now, he was out hunting right now. But I knew he wouldn't forgive himself for a few hundreds years. Eventhough I was furious at him, I couldn't imagine how he was feeling right now. I did not know anything about the thirst or the instincts vampires had, I couldn't imagine it either. I was feeling sorry for Renesmee. It was just not fair for her, we tried to paint her a blue sky but all we filled it with were dark clouds. Carlisle had assured me that she was with Rosalie and Emmett, Alice had been very strict about the place were they needed to stand to catch her from falling. He assured me that she was fine, but I wanted to see that for myself.
When Rosalie and Emmett walked in without Renesmee my heart skipped a beat. Rosalie who was looking chagrin just snarled at me before locking herself in her bathroom. Emmett just shrugged and explained that Seth and Leah had taken her, they assured him they would protect her. The blood was not a trouble for them, for now it was the best until everything was settled down here. So when that came to ears I quickly phased and ran home where I found them sitting before my fireplace. I quickly phased and grabbed an old jeans that I hid under a old tree for exactly this sort of moments. I quickly walked in to find them shooting all sorts of questions at her, Renesmee was hugging her knees and with a shy look and wide eyes she her eyes shot through the room. Questions were coming from everywhere.
"So you're really a hybrid?"
"How old are you now?"
"What do you eat?"
"What are your hobbies?"
"Are you venomous?"
"Are you wearing lenses and do your eyes get red when you drink human blood?"
Poor Renemsee didn't knew where to start as her eyes fluttered over the room.
"Yes she is really a hybrid, she is five and a half years old now, she eats human food and prefers strawberries, her hobbies are reading, listening to music and play piano, she isn't venomous and her eyes don't turn red when she drinks human blood" I said and immediately the room fell quiet, all heads including hers turned in my direction. Her eyes grew wide when she saw me.
"Hey Jake, we almost thought that nasty vampire ate you" Seth grinned towards me and I let out a deep sigh. Before I went on my search for Renesmee I had chosen Leah as my beta, Sam would have been the first option but he wanted to stop phasing soon, Emily was aging and he wanted to follow. eternal life wasn't an option for him, fate had decided that he was to grow old and die peacefully. Or at least that's what I hoped for him. So I nodded towards Leah, making clear I thought she did a good job. She just gave a quick nod back, even though I trusted Leah fully, she was still bitter and full of hatred towards the world. Sometimes that was a little bit much to handle but usually it worked out okay.
"You okay?" I nodded towards Renesmee. She just shrugged her shoulders as she tried to avoid my eyes. After a quick check up my pack left, most of them were on patrol tonight and Quill and Embry offered to run an extra shift around the house. Which was a perfect idea, which I was absolutely grateful for. After the noises died away I knelt down next to Renesmee.
"Liar" I accused and she raised her eyebrows in confusion.
"You're not okay are you?" I demanded.
"Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything, and everyone believed in you?" She answered instead "The days we were still innocent, the days we were growing up"
"We're still growing up Renesmee, we're never too old to learn something new. To experience new things. Being a grown up doesn't mean we don't believe in everything anymore, we just look at it different. We made a trade, our childish innocence for feelings and things we cherish the most. Life is a though route, but we need to choose which paths to take"
"Who I am is not who I want to be" she whispered "I lost my balance on my tightrope called life"
"But it is going to be okay" I assured her, but she didn't believed me. I could see it in her eyes, they were really the mirror to her feelings, and she was feeling troubled, upset and scared now.
"Can you change in a bunny?" She asked bluntly and I almost choked in my words. She raised those big deer like eyes looking for mine, when I was done with my coughing fit I returned big eyes at her.
"A bunny? Serious Nessie?" I asked her a little indignant.
"Well Edward said you were shapeshifters, not werewolves so I just wondered" she said while a spark of amusement colored her eyes.
"No we can not" I said
"Nessie can I ask you a question?" I asked as her eyes released mine. She just shrugged her shoulders still hugging her knees.
"Why.. Why did you show me those pictures of Patrick when I kissed you?"
She did not answer but her eyes grew big, as she raised her eyes on me her jaw dropped and she mouthed a small 'ohh'
"You didn't do it on purpose?" I asked somehow relieved.
"Ofcourse not, I was not aware that you could see that Jacob" She said firmly like she was denouncing me. The weight of the world that I was tossing with me fell off and I allowed myself to take a deep breath. That was good, real good.
"I just thought you thought I was a bad kisser" She said while she wrinkled her forehead. I could help but laugh when she said that, she laughed with me and laid her head on my shoulder.
"You know, you're the closest to a friend I have now" She mumbled as I wrapped my arm around her tiny shoulders. "Guess that's true, guess we have to make the best of it now heh?"
"Don't get illusions Jacob, I will betray you when the time is there" She said staring up to the ceiling, she followed the cracks in it with her eyes. "Well then I enjoy it how long it lasts" I answered her.
A little smile played her lips as she pinched her eyes together. Her hand searched for the necklace under her shirt. "Famiglia prima" she mumbled while she rubbed the silver letters on it. After that we sat in a comfortable silence, she was still not feeling very well but she managed not showing it. But she didn't had to, because I knew.
"What now?" she said while she let her tiny head rest on my shoulder. "What do you think of hot chocolate?" I offered and she nodded, trusting my opinion about food. So when I rose I offered her my hand, she declined and stood up. I walked towards the kitchen and she followed me, I made two hot coco with whipped cream. As we drank in silence a little bit of cream landed on her upper lip, I lifted my hand to wipe it away. For a second she froze, but when she noticed I didn't intend to harm her she let me.
"there was a little whipped cream" I explained and she gave me a weird look. Then she bend over and her hand rose ready to do the same for me. But instead wiping away anything she cupped my face and pressed her lips on mine. Uncertain she kissed me, It was a shy kiss filled with doubt. But still she was the one who'd started it.
Cloud nine.
When we parted up a huge smile was plastered on my face, she just smiled shyly at me as she pulled back.
"I'm sorry I sho.." I rammed my cup of coco on the table as I pulled her on my lap, my lips found hers automatically as we started to kiss breathtakingly.
Don't get illusions Jacob, I will betray you when the time is there.
In the next chapter we will meet Alec again! Curious? why don't you review? Let me know what you think is going to happen. I love your theories. :)
love.
