I do not own TORCHWOOD. I do however adore it!
Also I do not own Futurama.

Well just a bit of Janto there but I have other ideas plus I have no idea where the Weevil Mating/attracting ritual idea came from.

Sorry if there are any mistakes but no ones perfect.


The drive back was quiet no one speaking he glanced to his side where Ianto sat motionless staring out the window in the darkness of the passing countryside.
Toshiko was doing the same, and Gwen was leaning against Owen her hand clamped protectively on her wound.

"Owen we'll be back at the Hub in about half an hour is Gwen okay?"

"She'll be fine couple days off her feet should do the trick."

He nodded forcing his eyes back on the road and he heard Owen speak to Gwen quietly who had stirred before dozing off again. As he parked the car and got out he hoped his team the ones who he cared for would be able to survive and live with what they saw. Owen and Tosh helped Gwen who was still lacking co-ordination since Owen gave her some more painkillers. Ianto struggled out of the car and walked slowly and cautiously with the others, he stumbled as Jack caught him around the middle. Ianto's chest plastered to his side, he leaned his head on Jack's hip as the pain lessened enough for him to be pulled up.

Ianto had absolutely no idea who he was or where he was all he knew is he wanted to sleep or maybe clean and drink so much coffee it could endanger his health. And to shower to remove the physical memories from his body even though the emotional ones would take time to heal. Memories of someone he loved who had rejected his offer for help. A hand pulled him up and patted his chest softly. "Lean on me you're a bit unsteady." The same hands clasped his waist and walked him carefully a step at a time towards the Hub. He was gently helped on to the aging sofa even in his half conscious state he heard little bits of conversation and advice.

"Rest and take the painkillers only when you need them."

"Don't touch it too much."

"No heavy lifting."

He shook himself before getting up and walking to the medical area, where Owen was sorting Gwen out at least she wasn't as pale. A tinge of pink had swept her cheeks. Jack watched his face expressionless as Owen's medically trained hands placed new bandages and cleaned around the wound area.

Acting on an urge to get away from the chemistry coming from Gwen and Owen plus the emotion drifting off Jack. And with Jack his emotions always came across as intense. His emotional scents were nearly intense as his pheromone. Logging into the TORCHWOOD server he checked for any Rift changes he jumped when Tosh placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, he gripped his side and groaned.

"I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

"Yeah just a twinge."

She looked guilty while logging into her other computers, her cheeks twitched while she bit her lip. "Is something bothering you?"

She shook her head while saving some work and looked into her translation programme. "No, no. I'm fine Ianto. Fine." He didn't pry further but he knew that facial expression she was about to cry and he had been working with her for long enough to know her feelings for Owen.

And seeing him fawn over Gwen obviously made her upset since Owen always ignored her and he had seen often enough how his snide remarks made her flinch before turning back to her work. Finally tearing his eyes away from them Jack looked around to see Ianto gone. The Welshman defiantly moved quickly even in his current state.

"Ianto!"

"Captain?" he smirked at the tired reply, Tosh and his Welshman were working at the computers.

"You're supposed to be resting not working." Like a father he crossed his arms and regarded them with raised questioning eyebrows.

"Resting? Sir there's just been a Weevil sighting." He pointed at the map and rubbed his eyes before looking back at the screen.

"Okay, I'll drop you all off at home don't come into work tomorrow. Rest and don't worry Ianto I won't blow up the Hub or anything I'm not that irresponsible."

There was a beep which got Ianto's attention. "Actually five in the last ten minutes," Tosh gasped in shock than groaned. "Mating season I completely forgot!"

"Weevil mating rituals that's disgusting to watch." Owen said while supporting Gwen.

"What's it like?" she asked her words slightly slurred.

Ianto ran a hand through his hair. "Similar to a praying mantis just bigger."

Gwen looked blank. "Oh God! That is disgusting."

Owen glanced down at her in a I told you so manner. Gwen lost a bit of colour. "It's best if you don't try and picture it." Ianto advised.

"Why's that?" Gwen asked sourly before scrunching her face up.

Jack leaned against the desk and watched this is going to be fun.

"Well you think the mating ritual is disgusting, you should see the 'attracting a mate' ritual. Have you ever seen that episode of Futurama where Dr. Zoidberg goes back to his home planet for his species' mating?"

Ianto always had a way of explaining something and using a Futurama reference wasn't too bad. Gwen nodded vaguely. "Well it's sort of like that without the lobsters, jelly or beaches there's a lot of spikes, blood, body parts and screeching. If you're curious I'm sure Janet is already sexually frustrated you'll understand if you see it. The mating/attraction rituals usually lasts for about a week before the one month period of pregnancy and than labour."

"What happens after that?"

Ianto smiled tiredly as Jack hid a laugh under a cough.
"You get to bring the Weevil offspring into the world. Jack nearly lost a hand last year from a particularly hungry Weevil baby, Weevil labour is similar too..." he stopped in thought. "... human labour but with teeth and claws."

Might stay with the Weevil mating/attracting idea for a bit longer!