A/N: The letter that's in this chapter was written by my friend who RPs Clare.
(Back then):
Clare and Eli made plans to meet in Dawes class during lunch the next day so they could go over the papers. Clare had already read his letter, but wouldn't tell her who it was really to- Julia. Clare looked at Eli nervously as he took bites of his apple, reading her letter. "So? What do you think?" She asked, nervously.
"It's uh..."Eli started but Clare answered for him.
"Awkwardly constructed, filled with hyperbole, and generally sloppy?"She asked
"The titles centered."He tried to make her feel better.
She let out a sigh. "Dawes is right. I have writers block."
"So don't hand it in?"
"And what? Tell her the dog ate my homework?"She asked sarcastically.
"or you could take off?"He suggested.
"You mean skip?"she asked.
"If you want to get official."He took another bite of his apple.
"It would give me time to write a way better assignment..."She thought allowed.
The bell rung. "Decision time."He weighed his hands in the air. "Stay or go?"He asked.
Clare thought for a second, then grabbed her paper from his desk, closed her lunch container, and grabbed her bag, walking to the door, as Eli watched her with a confused expression. "Well? Ya comin'?" She asked. Eli contemplated it for a few moments before putting his apple in his mouth, grabbing the rest of his stuff and walked with her to the door, opening the door that led outside, looking behind him for any teachers before looking behind him to see if there were any teachers, then darted out with her.
"I'm not riding in a hearse! The only 2 people who should ride in a hearse is a dead body and the driver that is transporting that dead body. Not two high-schoolers skipping class!"Clare protested when Eli told her they'd take Morty.
"Oh, so you'd rather walk to The Dot, and possibly have someone who knows you drive by and realize your skipping class then you get us both caught?"He asked. Clare sighed as she threw the door open to the hearse, and sat in the passengers side, looking displeased by this. Eli grinned and closed her door before going around, getting in the drivers side. "Don't hate on Morty. She is my baby,"Eli said, as he started Morty, taking a few times to get her to start.
"Morty? You named your ca-Hearse... Morty?"She asked in shock. Eli just grinned at her as he headed toward the dot.
Eli and Clare got coffee to go, and sat on a bench, on a side road, going over their previous papers.
"Wow.. skipping school to do work. That's a first."
"Do you have something else you want to do?"She asked.
He thought."I guess we skipped so that you could write a better paper,"he sighed.
"I don't know what to write about."She sighed as well.
"Something that.. pisses you off,"he said.
"besides my English partner?"She shot at him.
"Ouch!"He put his hand over his chest as if she hurt him. "If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?"he asked.
"What happened between KC and me."
"Write about that, then,"he told her.
"I can't! It's personal."
He chuckled."You care too much about what people think... "He said.
Clare sighed. She remembered what happened when her and KC met and he thought the same thing. "That is not true."
"Then prove it. Scream. At the top of your lungs,"he told her. Clare looked horrified. This wasn't singing in front of a bunch of high schoolers - This was screaming in front of a bunch of strangers.
"Fine,"she finally said and let out a weak "ahhhhh" that died down after a few seconds. Eli chuckled.
"That's the best you got?"he asked, teasingly. Clare was now set on showing him what she was made up. She stood up and looked down at him. He raised his brows, curious and waiting. She looked around her before letting out a blood curling scream. A few people looked at her oddly, some jumped, Eli made a few facial expressions and smiled innocently as a women passed by, looking at them.
"Your turn,"She said.
"Yeah... Not my style,"he said, and got up, starting to walk off. The two started playfully arguing if he'd do it or not, as Clare backed Eli into an electric pole. He grabbed her wrists trying to gain some power of the situation. They both stopped when they realized how close they were. They both leaned in, and their lips touched. Clare kissed him softly, and Eli was more than willing to return. When they pulled back, they looked at each other, before Eli let go of her wrists, holding his hands up. Clare backed up. Eli glanced down some and Clare sat back on the bench. Eli could keep the smirk from his lips as he spoke; "We should get back, before we end up skipping the rest of the day."
Clare giggled a little, and nodded. "Back to the limo of death,"She teased. Eli just rolled his eyes, and rose his brow at her, waiting for her to stand. She stood up, and walked with him back to the hearse, and got in.
The ride back to the school was quiet- an awkward quiet. They didn't know what to say about the kiss. Once they got back to the school, Eli went around and opened the side door to Morty for her.
"Such a gentlemen."She smiled as she got out, and snuck back into the school with him. "I'll see you tomorrow?"She asked as they stood in front of their lockers and the bell rang. Eli nodded, and waved as he went off to the rest of his classes.
Eli was at home, alone, and playing on his laptop. He decided to check who was on facerange IM. Clare-E23. Eli smirked. It was Clare. He decided to IM her. 'More public embarrassment tonight?' he could help but smirk at her reply. 'Is that an invitation?'she replied. 'Do you want it to be?' he sent, with a curious smile. He grinned. 'Love to! Pick me up in an hour?' 'An hour? Eesh. How long does it take you to get ready?' he teased. 'if you keep teasing me, you'll spend your night alone (:' 'Alright. Alright. I'm done. See you in an hour.' he sent the final IM. 'One thing before I go?' she asked. He let out a silent groan as he replied. 'yes, Ma'am?' he asked. 'Do you know where I live?'she asked. He thought for a minute and realized he didn't. 'good point,'he replied, and wrote down her address after she sent it. 'see you in an hour, blue eyes.' he smirked at his nickname for her.
She logged out.
Eli decided to take a shower, since he had the time. Once he got out, he blow-dried and straighten his hair, then pulled on a black long sleeve button up, rolled up the sleeves to his elbows, grabbed his gray vest, pulled on black skinnies and his boots, and lastly grabbed his headphones. He put on the little amount of eyeliner he wore, and grabbed his keys, checking the time; 10 minutes til he had to pick up Clare. It would give him time to find her house.
As he drove down the street, he saw the medium sized '23' near the door, and put Morty in park. He gout out and went to wait by the passenger side as he saw her come out. "Right on time,"she said.
He just grinned at her. She was in a yellow tee shirt, and blue jeans with black flats. Her hair was curly like normal, as was her makeup. She held a gray cardigan in her arms as she walked down the stairs to him. He opened the passenger door. "Your Gothic chariot awakes, Madam." She giggled. More for the fact that her pen-name was 'Madam Degrassi'. She got in, and smiled at him as he closed the passenger side door, and went back around to the drivers side, opening the door, and got in. He turned down Marilyn Manson playing tainted love, that was blasting from the radio, as he put Morty back into drive.
They got coffee, and decided to sit out front of The Dot, to enjoy the night. Eli took a sip of his coffee
"Warning. Eli has coffee,"he teased.
"You had coffee earlier and you were fine,"She pointed out.
"Well, earlier, I was doing it to keep me awake, and get through boring school. But now it's night time and I'm awake,"he explained as he took another sip. Clare giggled, and then looked at him seriously.
"Eli, can I talk to you about something?"She asked. He put down his coffee and turned his attention.
"Yeah, of course,"he said.
"The kiss... earlier.. was bad. Not the kiss itself exactly, but... "She paused to think. "I don't want you to think I don't like you, Eli. Because I do. It's just... "She tried to think of how to explain things.
"You don't want to turn me in a rebound because you and KC just broke up, and your not completely over him." Even though he didn't phrase it like a question, she nodded.
"I just need a little bit to get over things. I don't want to act on these feels, and end up that I am using you as a rebound. I really don't want to think of things that way, but I am just being cautious," she said.
He nodded. "Yeah, I understand. It's fine. I have to get use to the new area, and new school. We can just hang out as friends until we both get settled. If things end up just being the fact that you and KC broke up, that's fine."
She smile. "I really don't think that they're rebound feelings, but it'd be better to be safe, than end up hurting you. Where exactly did you move from?"She asked, curiously.
"Hamilton. I lived there a lot of my life. Was born in Ajax, and moved to Hamilton when I was about 4 or 5," he explained.
"Why did you move after so long?"she asked curiously as she took a sip of her coffee.
Eli looked down. "Some emotional trauma went on back in Hamilton. My parents were worried, and thought I needed a fresh start."He let out a soft sigh.
She knew he didn't want to say anything more. She took his hand, trying to calm him. She could see how upset he was, even though he was trying his best to hide it. Clare heard her phone go off. She grabbed her phone, and answered. "Hello? I went out with a friend. At the dot. Alright. Yeah. I'll be home soon. I love you too, mom."She hung up.
"Parents calling to ruin our fun?"he teased. She giggled a little and nodded.
"Sorry. We have class tomorrow though,"She pointed out as they finished their coffee, and stood up, heading back to Morty.
They were quiet again as Eli drove her home. He pulled up in front of her house and smiled. "Make sure you finish your essay. I'll proof it before class tomorrow. Just come to the class room during the lunch period like we did today, and I'll help,"he said with a smile. She smiled back and nodded.
"I'll see you, Tomorrow. Sleep well,"she said, and leaned over, kissing his cheek before she got out of the hearse, and went toward her house. Eli watched to make sure she got in okay, and once the door was closed, he drove home.
Eli and Clare were sitting in Dawes' class. Eli was sitting on the desk in front of Clare, facing her as he read her essay. "Wow. How did it feel to write this?"he asked.
"Good. Really good. It's everything I wanted to say,"she said just as the bell rang.
Miss Dawes entered. "Miss Edwards, Mr. Goldsworthy. It's nice of you to join us today. Actually, I'm excited to hear your excuse for skipping last class. Let me guess - violent food poisoning?"she asked.
Eli smirked, and Clare spoke up. "Actually... We were both working on our assignments,"she said.
"Original, But it's not going to save you from detention."Clare's eyes widened. "Now I'd like to hear those assignments. Miss Edwards, why don't you go first?"She asked.
"Me?"She asked, horrified.
"Yeah. C'mon. We'll see if the assignment helped your writers block,"Dawes said and walked to the back of the class as Clare stood up with her paper, going to the front. She looked scared and nervous.
"I was in too deep, and cared too much to realize it, but we weren't going to last, no matter how hard we tried to keep it together. You changed too much, what happened to the guy that had me embarrass myself in the cafeteria our grade nine year? Was that all just an act? did I do that to you? Or did she do it to you when she came? Whatever reason it was, I guess it doesn't matter anymore.
But the day she came and looked at you, I knew something was going to happen, especially when I saw how you looked at her, too.
I denied it, forced myself to think it was just you being a good guy, but no, that wasn't it at all. She decided that she was going to take you from me, and I guess you decided that you would let her.
It hurts to remember what happened, but I guess that's what happens when a relationship ends the way we did. You basically cheated on me with her, and even through everything I don't hate you, and I occasionally still wish that we at least stayed doesn't matter now. You'll be happy with her, and I'm moving on. I'm sorry.. There- there's more,"She started to stutter as she held back the tears.
Miss Dawes held up her hand. "No, it's alright. It's a good start. What's say you, Eli?"she asked.
Eli looked up at Dawes nervously. He considered making a comment about Clare's assignment instead of going up, but knew that Clare would kill him. Specially since she was already so upset. Clare walked over to her seat, and sat down as Eli stood up. He looked at the class before back at his paper, and let out a sigh before he started to read;
'I'm sorry. I called you a slut, and other things that I didn't mean. I loved you with all my heart. Things were going great for a while, but I said the wrong thing at the wrong time. Everything blew up. We said everything we wanted to say, even though we truly didn't. They say that names and words can't hurt you, but they really can. Specially coming from the ones we love. The things we said. The names we called each other. They were all a mistake.
I didn't think things would end so badly. When I told you I didn't care what happened, didn't care what you did - it was just me upset. I beat myself over what happened for months, and I still do.
People tell me not to blame myself. They tell me that I didn't know it would happen. There was nothing I could have done. The truth was is that there was something I could have done. I could have kept my mouth shut. The look in your family's eyes at the funeral. Having to tell them what happened. Of course, your family was caring about it, and didn't blame me. They knew how hurt I was, and that I was already blaming myself. Izzy tried to help. She told me that she knew how much you loved me. but I will always have this guilt on me, knowing a few words less, and you'd still be alive.
I miss you, and I wish you could be here now.
It's almost been 2 years, and I keep telling myself that I need to get over you, but I can't. I don't even know if I ever will.' he looked up with tears in his eyes, that were threatening to spill over. It was the same with a lot of the other classmates. Even Miss Dawes looked like she was ready to cry. Saved by the bell. before even Miss Dawes said anything, the bell rang. Miss Dawes made her way back to the front of the room, and rubbed his back, before he went back to grab his stuff.
A/N: Yeah. This was a really long chapter, but I'm sure you guys will be okay with that. I'm going to barley go by the story anymore. Clare doesn't go to Vegas Night with Fitz. Eli doesn't pull the whole 'I'm sorry I led you on' thing, but they do still have the argument because Eli won't explain things about what happened with Julia. Fitz may still tried to stab Eli, but I haven't decided yet. Review and let me know what you guys want in the next chapter!
