Randumbness
A/N: Hey, if you've played FE:SS, you'll notice that L'Arachel is actually... sort of annoying. Not as annoying as Serra, but STILL. I think there's somethin' going on here...
Perhaps... A CONSPIRACY?
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Part IX : Erk and Dr. Pent
Erk was a troubled little mage, and he often had to confide in the only one who would listen to him- his teacher (or, whatever), Lord Pent. Of course, it was hard to catch him when he wasn't making out with his wife, Louise, during a fight, so he had to time his approaches very carefully in fear that he'd be yelled at.
He had a very open chance one day when they weren't fighting anybody in particular. In all actuality, they weren't fighting anybody even worth fighting, but they were picking up much-needed dropped weapons and Matthew and Legault were stealing from innocent bystanders.
"Erm, Lord Pent?" he asked somewhat timidly, since Pent was looking rather thoughtful. "Do you have a moment?"
"Yes, I do... uh..." His eyes narrowed as he tried to think of Erk's name. (A/N: Why would he forget him? Pent taught him various mad magic skillz!) "Irksome, was it?"
"Erk, milord," sighed the boy, rubbing his temples in embarrassment. "The one you taught everything about magic and whatnot."
"Oh, yes- you." The silver-haired man chuckled to himself for a few minutes, before sighing deeply and talking again. "What do you want, Irk?"
"It's Erk. And I wanted to know... Can I talk to you about something? I fear my fragile psyche is being damaged more and more by that wretched Serra girl," Erk blurted out, looking very much as though he would burst into tears. "She won't stop talking to or stalking me!"
"Well, Erm-"
"Erk."
"Yes, whatever," Pent waved nonchalantly. "I believe she has taken a liking to you. I remember my youth, when my dear Louise and I were but fifteen-ish, and she wouldn't leave me alone for more than five seconds." He then looked down to think. "Come to think of it, I had to run away many times from her..."
Erk looked distressed. "No! Not Lady Louise! She is too perfect!" He gaped in wonderment. "How could she be like Serra?"
"How can anybody be like anybody else, Erf?"
"Erk."
"Yes, yes, that doesn't matter." He chuckled again. "What does matter is that you end up getting married- a married man is a... content man. And then perhaps children! Yes, I'll suffer grave nightmares of your hellish children, but they may become more tolerable once they grow up a bit."
"You're so cheerful for somebody who just said that Serra's children will be like the Devil's himself!" Erk looked even more distressed. "I don't want to marry her! I don't want anything to do with that wife of Dracula! She's unholy! A demon! Not meant to be from a clergy!"
"Oh, stop ranting, Nerf-"
"Erk."
"Whatever," Pent replied curtly, looking a little annoyed. "If you don't quit worrying, you'll lose your hair and get wrinkles!" He then spotted his dear wife. "Ah, yonder lovely wife awaits. Fare thee well, young Jerk-"
"My name is Erk!" shouted Erk, tugging on his hair and glaring at Pent with sheer rage. "I can't see why you can't remember my name! AARGH!" He ran off, and, now that he'd blown his cover, Serra chased after him, screeching.
Louise approached, a confused look on her face. "What did you do to him, my lord?" she asked.
"Ah, I just didn't get his name right. It's like when I tried talking to Carry (Canas), Herbert (Hawkeye), and that Fred (Fiora) girl..." Pent smiled at Louise. "But I'll always remember your name, deary."
"You couldn't remember my name the first week I met you," Louise said in a no-nonsense voice, quirking an eyebrow at her husband. "You thought my name was Leonard."
"Oh, did I? Huh. I'm terribly sorry, dear."
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God knows where the inspiration for this crap came from. Oh, yes, I know... from NOWHERE. From the dark abyss in Sonic the Hedgehog games, that, when you fall into it, you die a horribly nonviolent death. That gorge in Death Valley outside of Kakariko Village in the Legend of Zelda, where, if you jump off like a fool (like I did), you disappear. And many more places...
Anyway, don't ask why Pent can't remember people's names... He just CAN'T for some reason. Also, I've had a lot to brood on during Summer Vacation, so that's why I've been able to update four days in a row. But don't expect any parts over this weekend, because I'm going camping. But come next Monday, watch this fanfiction... for it may hold my last updates until I have to go to school... again.
