I do not own anything except my OC. WARNING:Randomness, dank memes and a few grammar mistakes.

Chapter 8:DBZ Abridged The Dead Zone

It's Saturday evening. It's been days since day since Nova last saw his friends in Remnant so he decided to pay them a visit again. He then teleported to team RWBY's dorm, surprising the girls.

"WHADDUUP!" Nova said.

"Will you stop scaring us like that?!" Weiss said.

"No, because it's one of my charms. Anyway, how is it going?"

"You're on the news!" Ruby said.

"What? How?"

"Remember that big laser attack you did on the rooftop? It's all over the news." Yang said. Then she got her scroll and showed him a news report.

Lisa Lavender:Witnesses reported a giant beam of light in the sky. When it landed, it caused a massive explosion making a giant crater. The good news is that before the explosion there was no sign of life. What or who created that beam? Some people say it was a top secret Atlesian weapon. Most of them say that it was a huntsman using his or her semblance. Whoever that was, he or she knew that there was no life. Stay tuned for more information.

"Wow." Nova said.

"Yeah, wow." Yang said.

"That was weak."

"WHAT? That's your reaction?" Weiss said.

"I have done worse."

"If I didn't know you, I wouldn't believe it." Blake said.

"Anyway, what about you girls?"

"Not that much. Studying, training, watching meme review. You know, the usual."Ruby said.

"Great. Call the others. We're gonna watch some TFS."

"YES!" Ruby and Yang said.

"Great." Blake said sarcastically.

"NO! I don't want to!" Weiss said.

"Why? It's funny." Ruby said.

"Yes but I can't stand Goku's stupidity."

"Cmon give it another chance. Please?"

"No."

"Please?"

"No!"

"PLEASE?"

"NO!"

"Please?"

"Okay fine, I will."

"YAY!"

Later everyone sat down to enjoy the video.

"What are we watching?" Jaune said.

"The dead zone. The parody of the first DBZ movie." Nova said.

"Yes! Finally! More fighting and lasers!" Nora said.

"Glad you like it."

"What are you waiting for. Start it already." Yang said.

"Ok." Nova then started the video.

[DISCLAIMER]

KAISERNEKO: The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. DragonBall, DragonBall Z, and DragonBall GT are all owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, and Akira Toriyama. Please support the official release.

(cut to Piccolo in a rocky area)

PICCOLO: RAAAAAGH! (blows up giant rock formations with his scream)

This surprised everyone

"He destroyed that rock with his scream!" Yang said.

"Coooool!" Ruby and Nora said.

PICCOLO:(thinking) Perfect. Now I have a place to put my castle once I rule the world.

"He's building a castle? Why?" Weiss said.

"Because every villain has a castle. DUH! Everyone knows that. "Nora said.

"And I thought you were smart." Nova said.

"Shut up." Weiss said

PICCOLO: And it'll have all the things a castle requires. Like walls...and subjects. (out loud) Maybe even a tribu- Huh? (notices a shadowy figure heading towards him) (thinking) Wait, are they running on air? (looks behind and sees another shadowy figure behind him) That's ridiculous, they're flying! Why would they ever even need to- (a third shadowy figure uppercuts him from below) OH, GOD!

"Nice response" Yang said.

NIKKI: F**k him up! (the three shadowy figures attack Piccolo) From the front!

SANSHO: To the back!

PICCOLO: Oh, you better just KILL me! (sees four shadowy figure preparing to attack) ...Shit.

It got a few laughs.

(The three shadowy figures simultaneously fires a blast at Piccolo, who screams as all three blasts connect. Cut to Kami inside his Lookout.)

KAMI: OH!

"Who is that?" Jaune asked.

"He looks like Piccolo." Ren said.

"He is Kami. He's the guardian of Earth."

MR. POPO: (from outside) You okay in there, Kami?

KAMI: Mr. Popo, I believe...that Piccolo may have been slain!

MR. POPO: (from outside) I think you'd know if he were! ...You still there?

KAMI: Yes.

MR. POPO: (from outside) Then he ain't dead, is he, Drama Queen?

"So if Piccolo dies, Kami will die too? Why?" Blake said.

"Because Kami and Piccolo are the same person. It's a long story." Nova said.

KAMI: But you don't understand!

MR. POPO: (from outside) Drama Queen!

KAMI: I think Garlic Junior may have-

MR. POPO: (from outside) Drama Queeeeeeeeeen... (is heard walking away)

"He doesn't take him seriosly." Pyrrha said.

"What an asshole." Yang said.

"But he's right." Nova said.

KAMI: Mmm... Garlic Jr.'s back.

("DragonBall Z Abridged: Lord Slug" logo first appears on the screen and then disappears to show the text "Dead Zone")

(cut to Gohan in the forest)

GOHAN: (reading "Adventures of Huckleberry Finn") "Miss Watson, she kept pecking at me, and it got tiresome and lonesome. By and by, they fetched the nig-" Huh, that's not a word I've ever heard before. Oh, well. "They fetched the nig-"

"The n-word again!" Nora said.

"Was that true?" Blake said.

"Yeah, Huckleberry Finn had a lot of n-words. Different times." Nova said.

CHI-CHI: (from inside the house) Gohan, lunch is ready! Come help me set the table!

GOHAN: Oh, yay! And Dad's gone fishing! Which means I'll get seconds!

(Gohan closes his book and then cuts to Goku underwater who seems to hear this and immediately jumps out of the water, naked and holding the tail fin of a fish. Cut back to Gohan walking toward his house.)

"Why was he naked in the lake?" Ruby said.

"Because he's Goku."Nova said.

GOHAN: Huh?

OX-KING: Hey! Gohan!

GOHAN: Grandpa Ox!

CHI-CHI: (walks out the front door) Oh, Daddy! What are you doing here?

OX-KING: I wanted to drop by and see my grandson! Also, money for you guys to live!

"They live with his money? Doesn't Goku have a job?" Pyrrha said.

"In the abridged version no. In the original he's a farmer." Nova said.

CHI-CHI: Thank you, Daddy!

OX-KING: I also brought you a gift, Gohan!

GOHAN: *gasps* A puppy!

OX-KING: BOOKS!

GOHAN: (eyes narrowed, in an uninterested tone) Yay...

Everyone laughed.

"Getting books as a gift isn't that bad." Blake said.

"Yeah but a little kid wouldn't react the same." Nova said.

CHI-CHI: Oh, I'm sure he'll love them. Won't you, Goha- (a book falls on Gohan's head) Daddy?

GOHAN: Grandpa? Grandpa? (the Ox-King collapses and almost falls on Gohan) Mom.. Mom! MOM! (runs to Chi-Chi) Mommy! Grandpa's having a stroke!

Everyone was shocked.

CHI-CHI: Huh? (notices a cloaked hooded figure)

GINGER: Hi.

CHI-CHI: Gohan, go inside immediately!

NIKKI: (is waiting inside the house) Oh, yeah! Come on in! (eats a bunch of pears)

"That's kinda impressive." Yang said.

CHI-CHI: (thinking) Son of a bitch just ate my pears.

"Who cares about the pears?" Weiss said.

CHI-CHI: (out loud) You know we don't have a car, right?! That's like a ten mile Nimbus ride to the nearest city! For pears! You have ten seconds to tell me what you want before I strangle you with that cowl!

GINGER: I want the DragonBall! Give me the kid!

"Why take Gohan? He can just take the Dragon Ball." Blake said.

CHI-CHI: What? You can't have my son. You just want the DragonBall, right?

"Exactly."

GINGER: Don't question my f**king methods! F**k it! I'm taking your dad! (lifts up the Ox-King a bit then drops him) He's a f**king fatass! Forget it! I'm gonna take your kid!

"That's just mean." Ruby said.

SANSHO: (off-screen) Yo, Ginger...

GINGER: Oh, right! Dragon Ball, too! Please! ...If you wouldn't mind.

"Worst minion ever."

CHI-CHI: I do.

GINGER: Too f**king bad!

This got a few laughs.

CHI-CHI: Enough of this! (charges at GInger only to get knocked down easily)

Everyone got shocked(again).

GOHAN: Mommy!

GINGER: Ha-ha! F**king what?

(cut to Goku running while carrying the fish and arriveing on the scene to find Chi-Chi on the ground)

GOKU: Chi-Chi! I heard lunch! What happened?!

Everyone laughed.

"Are you kidding me? He only cares about food!" Weiss said.

CHI-CHI: Goku, they took-

GOKU: Our lunch?

"I don't think he cares about Gohan." Pyrrha said.

CHI-CHI: No. They took...our so-

GOKU: Oh, hey. Your dad's here. Hi, Ox-King!

Everyone laughed even more.

"He acts like a kid." Weiss said

CHI-CHI: Focus! They took...Gohan!

GOKU: Aw, man! I can't have him miss lunch! It's the fourth most important meal of the day! Right after brunch...but right before linner. ...Love me some linner, though. So I'ma go get Gohan back. We'll be back in time for linner. Chicken and waffles? Chicken and waffles. (the Ox-King coughs) Oh, and some for your dad.

"I can't believe this conversation happened." Blake said.

"I'm hungry." Nora said.

(cut to inside garlic Jr's castle)

GARLIC JR.: So let me get this straight. I sent you shipdits off to find me a Dragon Ball, and you bring back a toddler?

SANSHO: Well, we did bring back the DragonBall!

"And a toddler!" Weiss said.

GARLIC JR.: And a toddler! Did you try, I don't know, taking off the hat?

NIKKI: Well, we thought about it on the way back, but it really brings the whole Chinese Prince look together.

GINGER: And he's your size. You can ROCK that shit!

"He would still be ugly." Weiss said.

GARLIC JR.: ...Fair enough.

GOHAN: My daddy's not gonna let you get away with this!

GINGER: Big f**kin' whoop! We beat Piccolo, and that guy's strong as shit!

This got a few laughs.

"Strong as shit." Yang said while laughing.

GOHAN: Yeah? So did my dad!

GINGER: By himself?!

GOHAN: Yeah!

GARLIC JR.: (realizes there's only one man strong enough to defeat Piccolo) Oh God, your father's Goku.

Everyone started laughing.

"He's so screwed."

GARLIC JR.: OH MY GOD, YOU MORONS STOLE GOKU'S KID?! HOW?! HOW DID YOU STEAL GOKU'S KID?!

NIKKI: Well, first we beat up his wife...

They laughed even louder.

GARLIC JR.: Oh, my shit... Okay, look. New plan: get the last two DragonBalls. NOW!

NIKKI: Oh, yeah! We'll just go off, scour the globe, and be back before linner! *laughs* You know, it's not like they make a radar for this shit...

"They have a radar, right?" Blake said.

"Yeah." Nova said.

(cut to inside Kame House with Goku and the gang looking at the Dragon Radar)

GOKU: Oh, yeah. Someone is collecting the DragonBalls.

BULMA: Why'd they take Gohan?

GOKU: I don't know. Maybe they just want a good ol'-fashioned Goku fanny-whoopin'!

"Fanny-whoopin'?" Ruby said.

BULMA: "Fanny"?

GOKU: Chi-Chi doesn't like us to swear.

"Ass isn't a swear." Yang said.

"When you say it like that it is." Weiss said.

"I guess you're right."

BULMA: "Butt" isn't a swear!

GOKU: ...The HFIL you talkin' about?

(cut to Nikki chasing Gohan around the castle)

NIKKI: COME BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE SHIPLIN!

GOHAN: No! You smell like hairspray and shea butter!

Everyone laughed.

"What is shea butter?" Ruby said.

"Nut butter." Nova said.

NIKKI: Swear to God, I don't know how I got put in charge of babysitting. I need something to take the edge off. (grabs and bites an apple, then gets smacked from behind by Gohan)

GOHAN: You're it! (takes off)

"He's just playing!" Ruby said while laughing.

NIKKI: I will slap FIRE FROM YOU! I swear to God... (walks upstairs and finds Gohan) Oh, good. There you are. Now, be a good little crotch spawn and let's go back to your room!

"Crotch spawn? That was hilarious!" Yang said while laughing

GOHAN: I'm hungry!

NIKKI: Ah, well, maybe I can make you a peanut butter, jelly, and ether sandwich, and- (Gohan pulls out an apple from his robe) Where did you get that apple?

GOHAN: In the tree.

NIKKI: Don't eat that apple!

GOHAN: I'ma eat the apple.

NIKKI: Don't eat that apple!

GOHAN: I'ma eat the apple!

"Why not eat the apple?" Ruby asked.

"In the original, the apple made you drunk. In this, it takes you high." Nova said doing a smoking weed motion.

"What?!" Everyone said.

NIKKI: DO...NOT...EAT...THAT A- (Gohan eats the hole apple) Oh, balls... Well, I hope you packed your bags, kid. Because you're about to go on a TRIP...

(Gohan goes on a trip that would make Alice's trip in Wonderland jealous before cutting to him spacing out)

Everyone laughed in the beginning but then they got terrified.

"Was that a dragon head with blood on its eyes?!" Blake said.

(cut to Ginger and Sansho returning to the castle)

GINGER: Got the last motherf**kin' balls!

(cut to all seven DragonBalls together and glowing)

"Are we going to see the dragon?" Jaune said.

"Yeah and let me tell you, no matter how many times you see it, it never gets old." Nova said.

GARLIC JR.: Got to say, I'm sort of impressed. How did you find them so fast?

GINGER: Prize in a high stakes poker game!

GARLIC JR.: Wow. Never thought you had a poker face.

GINGER: Never said I played!

They laughed a little.

GARLIC JR.: Once again, fair enough.

(they summon Shenron, the eternal dragon)

"Wow!" Everyone said.

"That was so awesome!" Yang said.

"And well animated." Ren said.

SHENRON: I am the eternal dragon. Make your wish, and I shall-

GARLIC JR.: MAKE ME IMMORTAL!

"Rude." Weiss said.

SHENRON: OH! R-really? Wow! I can't remember the last time someone actually nutted up and asked for that! Congrats! Can't wait to hear how you f**k this up.

Everyone laughed.

"How could he fuck that up? He will become immortal." Yang said.

"Being immortal is great but i's kinda lonely. I know that feeling very well." Nova said.

Then everyone felt sad for Nova.

"Let's just watch the video."

GARLIC JR.: Wait, the hell's that mean?

SHENRON: It means YOUR WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED! (makes Garlic Junior immortal and disappears)

GARLIC JR.: Yes! YES! I can feel it! With this eternal body, I shall enslave the world and rule it with great prejudice and terror! Hail Garlic Jr.! HAIL ME! (starts walking inside his castle)

MINIONS: HAIL GARLIC JR.! HAIL GARLIC JR.!

GOKU: HEY, GARLIC JR.!

MINIONS: HEY, GARLIC JR.! Huh? (they all turn around to look at Goku)

Everyone laughed.

"Goku's here! Yay!" Ruby said.

"Great." Weiss said sarcastically.

GOKU: I am Son Goku! And your name sounds yummy!

They laughed.

GARLIC JR.: I have been told.

GOKU: So, uh... Did you guys steal my kid?

GINGER: Yup! F**kin' Amber Alert up in here!

"Can someone kill him already?" Weiss said.

NIKKI: Oh, don't worry about him, he's just high in the throne room.

GOKU: Joke's on you! I can fly!

Most of them facepalmed.

GINGER: ...I think he's f**kin' dumb.

Everyone laughed.

KAMI: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (drops in from the sky)

"Kami is here too!" Ruby said.

GARLIC JR.: And then there's THIS asshole!

KAMI: Oh, hello, Goku. What are you doing here?

GOKU: They stole my kid.

KAMI: Mm.

"They're acting so casual." Pyrrha said.

"Because they know they won't die. I think." Ruby said.

GARLIC JR.: I'm quite surprised you're still alive, Kami! I believe the last time we talked was... Oh, when was that? Oh, right. When you BANISHED my father to another DIMENSION!

"Really?" Ruby said.

"Yeah. Kami banished Garlic jr's father to the dead zone." Nova said.

KAMI: Oh, Garlic Jr.. How awful to see you again. You're looking grotesque as always.

GARLIC JR.: Oh, hi there, kettle, name's pot! Have we met?

"Roasted." Nora said.

KAMI: Listen, Goku. Just go after your son. I'll handle Garlic Jr..

GOKU: Thank God!

KAMI: You're welcome. (Goku dashes past Garlic Jr. and heads inside the castle)

Everyone laughed.

"Why did he said you're welcome?" Blake said.

"Because kami means god in japanese." Nova explained.

GINGER: Catch that bitch! (takes off after Goku)

NIKKI: Slow your roll, champ! (also takes off after Goku)

SANSHO: Hey, yo, wait for me! I'm bigger than y'all! (follows his comrades and takes off after Goku)

"Where did he find those minions?" Weiss said.

(Garlic Jr. and Kami stare at each other before cutting to Goku inside the castle)

GOKU: Man, left in such a hurry, I accidentally skipped lunch! Maybe this place has a cafeteria. No, it's a castle. (stops in the middle of the hall) A meatery? (begins running up the stairs only for Garlic Junior's minions to block his path)

"How can he about food in a time like this?" Weiss said.

GINGER: You want some food? We can hook you up! How 'bout some motherf**kin' ginger?!

NIKKI: Or maybe some cinnamon?!

SANSHO: I got some pepper for you. You like pepper?

"Those aren't foods." Nora said.

GOKU: Hey, those aren't foods! Those are things you put ON foods!

GINGER: Like GINGERBREAD?!

NIKKI: Or CINNABUNS?!

SANSHO: I-I got nothin', um... (pause) EEEEEEEEEEEEEEGGS!

Everyone laughed.

(all three minions bulk up)

"Things got difficult now." Jaune said.

"Goku can handle them." Ruby said.

"Yeah, he's strong as shit." Yang said and everyone started laughing.

GOKU: Okay, now you're just making me hungry! And you wouldn't like me when I'm- (gets attacked by the minions) Wait! Ahh! (hits a pillar and then gets back up on his feet) ...Hungry!

"They're so screwed now." Nova said.

(cut back to Garlic Junior and Kami)

GARLIC JR.: So, Kami, you mad that I tried to have you killed?

KAMI: More confused why you target Piccolo instead of me. Not that it matters; I'm going to put you down for good, not unlike I did your FATHER, you miserable little-

GARLIC JR.: And I will enjoy watching you fail! Because you see, before you arrived, I used the DragonBalls to grant myself immortality! (starts laughing)

KAMI: Wait, so you tried to have me killed, then used the DragonBalls?

GARLIC JR.: (stops laughing) What? Yeah, why? Oh, shit... Wow, I dodged a bullet on that one! Thank God my minions are so incompetent!

"I don't get it." Ruby said.

"Kami made the dragon balls. If Kami dies, the dragon balls will not exist, they will be just rocks." Nova said.

"And if Piccolo dies, Kami will die too, because they're the same person." Ren said.

"That's right."

(cut back to inside the hall with Goku knocking all three minions to the ground)

GOKU: Now tell me where the meatery is! ...And then the throne room! ...Please tell me the meatery is IN the throne room!

"He still thinks about the meatery? He's unbelievable!" Weiss said.

"I want a meatery." Nora said.

GOKU: (Nikki and Sansho fire a blast at Goku, but their blasts gets redirected by two blasts) Huh?

"Who was that?" Jaune said.

"It's probably Piccolo." Ruby said.

KRILLIN: HERE I COME TO SAVE THE DAY!

"No way." Yang said.

"It's Krillin!" Ruby said.

KRILLIN: Hey, Goku! Looks like you could use some help!

"Wait, there were two blasts." Blake said.

GOKU: Not really, no. Hey, Krillin! Is that a second power beam?

PICCOLO: 'Sup?

Everyone laughed.

"It's Piccolo!" Ruby said.

(Krillin screams and jumps back)

Everyone laughed again.

GOKU: Oh, hey, Piccolo!

GINGER: You alive?!

GOKU: Well, of course he's alive! Kami's alive! I mean, you guys have used the DragonBalls, right?

GINGER: ...Oh, wow! Yeah! Thank God we incompetent!

They laughed harder.

PICCOLO: Not even gonna lie, this is EXACTLY what I'm looking for in a castle. Walls, ceiling, meatery...

GOKU: WHERE?!

"Again with the meatery?" Weiss said.

"I want a meatery!" Nora said.

PICCOLO: (eyes the minions) ..Could do without the spice rack, though.

(Krillin is freaking out, when he feels liquid on top of his head, and he looks up to find that Gohan has wandered out and is now peeing on his head)

Everyone started laughing

KRILLIN: WHY- (begins to gurgle as his mouth fills up with urine)

They couldn't laugh louder than now.

"That's gross!" Yang said while laughing.

"Why so much hate at Krillin?" Pyrrha said.

(Cut back to Kami and Garlic Jr. who have begun their battle. Kami tries firing eye beams at Garlic Jr, but he evades them and headbutts Kami to a pillar.)

GARLIC JR.: (punctuates each word with a blow) WHERE...IS...YOUR...GOD...NOW?! (the last punch sends Kami through the pillar, who manages to hold onto an edge to avoid falling)

"That was a good line." Jaune said.

GARLIC JR.: So, Kami, why don't you pray for your life? And then, like every person who's ever prayed to you, I'll ignore it! (Kami begins to glow) What the- (Kami uses an Explosive Wave to send Garlic Junior crashing into a wall and landing on his face) (muffled) In case you know... This means war!

This got a few laughs.

"That sounded like a cartoon line." Ruby said.

"It is a cartoon line." Nova said.

(cut back to inside the castle)

GOKU: Gohan! (runs for the stairs, but his path is once again blocked by the minions) Krillin, I take back what I said! Get my son!

KRILLIN: Woo-hoo, I'm helping! (starts running up the stairs, but runs into Sansho)

SANSHO: I'ma break your butt!

Everyone laughed.

"That was a good one." Yang said.

SANSHO: (charges at Krillin, but Piccolo sends a blast through the floor, which causes him to fall)

KRILLIN: Oh, thank God he's on our side! (runs after Gohan)

PICCOLO: I was aiming for the short, bald one, but...you'll do.

"Why he was aiming Krillin?" Pyrrha said.

"Because he is evil." Nova said.

"Oh yeah, I forgot that." Ruby said.

SANSHO: You mean! (gets blasted him through a wall)

PICCOLO: Not so tough without your two back up dancers, are you, ugly?

SANSHO: Now, why you gotta be throwin' out mean words like that?!

PICCOLO: You know, that's fair. How about I grab a couple of friends and try to murder you instead?

SANSHO: Well personally, I think that would be uncalled for! (Piccolo hits him again, sending him stuck onto a wall)

PICCOLO: You're right. Because unlike you.. (finishes off Sansho with a blast) ..I don't need help. (starts walking outside)

"That was so cool! I like Piccolo!" Ruby said.

"Me too. He's badass." Yang said.

"Everyone loves Piccolo." Nova said.

(deeper inside the castle, Goku is still fighting against Ginger and Nikki, who arm themselves with swords)

"That's so cool." Ruby said.

GOKU: Oh, come on, you guys! That's not fair! I can't pull swords out of my body!

NIKKI: STAND STILL AND YOU WILL! (he and Ginger gang up and attacks Goku)

GOKU: (while dodging each of their attacks) No, no, no, no, no, no, no! (they cut some of his hair) NO! MY 'DO! (hits block both Nikki and Ginger's attacks with his power pole) STRANGER DANGER! (extends the power pole to send Nikki crashing to the ground)

Everyone laughed.

GINGER: That shit gets LONGER?!

NIKKI: (muffled, in pain) OH, YEAH, IT DOES!

GOKU: GOKU KICK! (kicks Ginger in Nikki's direction)

This got a few laughs.

"That was a normal kick. Why would he name it?" Blake said.

"Because it makes it cooler." Nova said.

GOKU: Kamehame...

GINGER: You ain't got shit! (fires a blast of his own)

GOKU: HA! (fires the Kamehameha wave, which swallows Ginger's blasts and sends him flying in Nikki's direction)

NIKKI: (thinking) Friggin' hell... Last time I take on a guy with a pole that big...

Everyone laughed.

"GAAYYY!" Nova yelled.

GINGER: INCOMING!

NIKKI: OH, MY GOD! (they both get caught in the blast)

They laughed harder.

GINGER: (muffled from underneath the rubble) What a...a douchebag... (groans with his hand becoming limp)

(cut Kami and Garlic Jr. now inside the castle, and Kami's not doing any better than he was before)

GARLIC JR.: What's wrong, Kami? Fallen and can't get up? Do I need to push that big, red button for you? (Kami stumbles forward and lands on Garlic Jr.'s shoulder) ...Okay, you're making this weird, Kami.

"What is he trying to do?" Ruby said.

KAMI: We'll see how that immortality works out for you when I've blown us both into bits! (locks his arms around Garlic Jr. and begins charging his attack)

Everyone was shocked.

"He is going to blow himself up?" Blake said.

"But Garlic jr is immortal. It's useless." Ren said.

GARLIC JR.: Oh, really? You want to stress-test this? Sure, go ahead! And while my men are scraping little green chunks off the wall, I'll be partying in my throne room with a harem of sexy demon skanks! Seriously, what part of IMMORTALITY don't you understand?

Some of them laughed.

PICCOLO: Actually, I'm with him. I'm gonna have to ask you not to blow yourself up right now.

GARLIC JR.: Well, well... It seems you've eluded my men!

PICCOLO: Yeah, sure. Let's go with that.

They laughed.

"He killed him." Yang said while laughing.

GARLIC JR.: Oh God, they're all dead, aren't they?

GOKU: Yup! Thank goodness they were so incontinent!

They laughed harder

GARLIC JR.: Looks like if you want someone killed right...you kill them yourself!

PICCOLO: Ooh, I might use that!

"It wasn't that good."

(Garlic Junior bulks up, being ten times his original size)

"Of course he can do that." Yang said sarcastically.

GOKU: Huh... For a second, there, I swore he was gonna yell out "spaghetti" or something... (Garlic Jr. attacks him and Piccolo and fires a blast, with both of them getting out of the way. Goku grabs Kami to and drops him at a safe distance.) Kami! Stay here and don't move! (takes off)

"What else can he do?!" Weiss said.

KAMI: I swear if I didn't know you, I'd call you a smartass.

Everyone laughed.

(Piccolo throws a punch at Garlic Jr., which does absolutely nothing)

GARLIC JR.: (speaking in a more deeper voice) Been bulking since I installed the meatery!

GOKU: ( jumps in front of Piccolo and attacks Garlic Junior) Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it? Where is it?

Everyone laughed but Weiss got tired with the meatery joke.

GARLIC JR.: I'm sure you can find one in hell! (fires a blast at Goku and Piccolo simultaneously, which causes the castle to start falling apart)

(cut to Krillin running to avoide the falling rocks while carrying Gohan)

KRILLIN: (repeatedly says, "Crap!" to the Tetris theme) Crap, crap-crap, crap, crap-crap, crap, crap-crap, crap, crap-crap, crap, crap-crap, crap, crap, crap. (gets hit by a massive beam on the head, causing him to fall unconscious and drop Gohan, who gets buried under debris)

Everyone laughed and got worried about Gohan

(cut to Goku hiding from Garlic Junior)

GARLIC JR.: TOOT TOOT! (grabs Goku by the head)

Everyone laughed.

"What was that?" Ruby said.

"The pain train." Yang said.

GOKU: Aahh!

PICCOLO: (thinking) Ugh, my WRIST.. It doesn't hurt a LOT, but it's DEFINITELY uncomfortable.. Maybe I should get a wrist brace or some-

"How can he talk about that in a moment like that?" Weiss said.

GARLIC JR.: PAIN TRAIN'S COMING! (grabs Piccolo's head as well)

GOKU: Hey, Piccolo!

Everyone laughed.

"He's so stupid." Yang said while laughing.

(Garlic Jr. takes both of them outside of the castle by bursting through a wall)

GARLIC JR.: Next stop: ROCK BOTTOM! (crushes them both into the ground)

GOKU: (muffled) I get it!

Everyone laughed harder.

GOKU: (he and Piccolo get away) That's it! Takin' off my clothes! (takes off his shirt)

"Oh yeah, I forgot! They were wearing weighted clothing." Ruby said.

PICCOLO: Wait a minute, why would you even bring your weighted gi?

GOKU: Why would you? (Piccolo takes off his cape and turban)

PICCOLO: Because I don't have a house to leave them in!

"Aww, poor Piccolo." Pyrrha said.

GOKU: Why don't you just buy a house with the Ox-King's money?

"Is he that stupid?" Blake said.

PICCOLO: What world do you live in?

GOKU: One with a house...and a wife...and a son!

"Not only he's stupid, he's also a bragging jerk." Weiss said.

PICCOLO: ...I really don't care for you right now. (both he and Goku charge at Garlic Jr.)

GARLIC JR.: Give me your best sho-

(Goku and Piccolo blast him simutaneously, sending him flying away)

"He's dead!" Ruby said.

"He's immortal." Blake said.

"Oh."

GOKU: And that's the way the garlic crumbles!

KAMI: You DO realize he's immortal.

"Exactly."

PICCOLO: Pretty sure you chop garlic.

KAMI: Seriously, he wished for immortality before you showed up!

Everyone laughed.

"They're ignoring him!" Yang said.

GOKU: Either way, I call this another win for Goku!

PICCOLO: 'Scuse me? That was my kill!

KAMI: He's going to get up at any moment! He's got this technique, too, and it's-

GOKU: Piccolo, it's not a competition! I already won!

Everyone is surprised by Goku's attitude

"Goku is such an asshole." Yang said.

KAMI: You can still sense him! He's not-

PICCOLO: I am going to wear your entrails as sweatbands!

Everyone laughed with that.

KAMI: I can literally see the debris SHAKING!

(Goku and Piccolo ignore Kami and attack each other, and Garlic Junior gets back up)

GARLIC JR.: I AM ONE HUNDRED AND TEN PERCENT DONE!

(summons the a dark abyss known as the Dead Zone, which begins sucking up everything, although Goku and Piccolo don't notice until it causes the floor below them crumbples, which causes them to fall)

"What is that black hole?!" Ruby said.

GARLIC JR.: This is the Dead Zone! The SAME dimension you banished my dear father to, Kami!

Everyone was on the edge of their seat now.

KAMI: So is that how your father receives conjugal visits?!

GARLIC JR.: EAT A DICK, YOU WRINKLED GREEN DUSTBIN!

Everyone laughed.

(the dead zone is starting to suck everything into it, including the castle)

PICCOLO: NO! My castle! (starts flying towards the Dead Zone, but Goku manages to grab him by the foot)

"He was thinking to take the castle after the fight?" Blake said.

"It had a meatery. Who can say no?" Nova said.

GOKU: Hey, Piccolo! He's not dead!

"No shit." Everyone said.

PICCOLO: YEAH, how 'bout that?!

KAMI: YEAH, HOW 'BOUT THAT?!

PICCOLO: Well, then...this victory is MINE! (fires a blast at Garlic Jr., but it just bounces off)

GOKU: ...You want, I should take a turn?

Everyone laughed.

PICCOLO: Shove it, Goku!

(meanwhile, Krillin regains consciousness as he is being sucked toward the Dead Zone)

KRILLIN: OH GOD, NO!

"No Krillin!" Pyrrha said.

GARLIC JR.: EVERYONE IS GETTING SUCKED TODAY! Demons, humans, and Gods alike! It's even sucking up your children!

GOHAN: LEAVE MY DADDY ALONE! (crashes through the debris he was buried under)

"Gohan is fine!" Ruby said.

"And angry." Yang said.

GARLIC JR.: Huh?

GOKU: Gohan?! Krillin, you had one job!

Everyone laughed.

GARLIC JR.: Oh, how cute! And what is the four-year-old going to do to stop me? (Gohan sends a blast at him which hits him head on) Ah. (flies inside the Dead Zone, which shatters)

They couldn't stop laughing.

"That was so lame!" Yang said while laughing.

(cut to Gohan sleeping in Goku's arms)

GOHAN: (wakes up and see Goku) Daddy!

GOKU: Hey, son!

GOHAN: What happened?

GOKU: I don't know! I think I won.

"He took the credit! Unbelievable!" Weiss said.

GOHAN: You're the best, daddy!

GOKU: Uh-huh! Now, let's go han, Go-home! It's almost time for dikfast! (picks up his power pole and walks away with Krillin and Kami)

"Let's Gohan gohome."Yang said whilie laughing.

PICCOLO: (watching from above) ...I'm gonna steal that kid.

Everyone laughed.

(shows Goku and Gohan heading home on the Flying Nimbus)

NARRATOR: And so, the brave Son Goku and his son defeated the evil Garlic Jr.! With the help of Piccolo, Kami, and the greatest ally known to man-kind...

KRILLIN: ...The sex master and kung-fu legend- (cut to Kame House) KRILLIN!

Everyone laughed.

Nappa: (on the phone) Yeah, okay, so I'm gonna have to stop you right there. First question: WHY would he summon the Dead Zone-the only thing that could defeat him?

"Isn't that one of the saiyans from the first episode?" Ren said.

"Yeah, it's a long story with a lot of spoilers." Nova said.

KRILLIN: Okay, you know, I wrote myself into a corner with that whole immortality thing. Pretty much regretted it immediately after.

"What is going on?" Jaune said.

"Everything that happened is actually a movie script by Krillin." Nova said.

"So it never happened." Blake said.

"Yes."

Nappa: Second question, I mean no offense: Why exactly were you there?

"Yeah, why was he there?" Yang said.

KRILLIN: I do bring a certain humanistic edge to the setting...

Nappa: And WHY did you write yourself getting peed on?

"Who would write that?" Blake said.

KRILLIN: The better question is: how much will you PAY ME to get peed on?

Nappa: ...You're gonna go far in this business.

KRILLIN: Woo-hoo!

Everyone laughed.

[The film, Skygina, was eventually grossed 7 billion Zeni in its first to Krillin's lack of foresight, however, as well as a convoluted contract, he received no money from the film and was stricken from the credits.

Everyone laughed.

"What an idiot." Weiss said.

He now lives, broke as the day he was born, at Kame House.]

"Poor Krillin." Pyrrha said.

("Twlight Zone" by Golden Earring starts playing as the credits roll. Garlic Jr. is shown pounding his fist as he is trapped in the Dead Zone.)

"That movie was nice." Yang said.

"It was okay." Weiss said.

"The animation was good, for it's time." Ren said.

"The music was fitting." Jaune said.

"I want a meatery." Nora said.

"Dragon Ball is now my favourite cartoon!" Ruby said.

*record scratch*

"What?" Nova said.

"What?"

"What did you say?"

"What did I say?"

"About Dragon Ball."

"What?"

"About being a cartoon."

"It's not?"

"Of course it's not! It's an anime!"

"What's the difference?" Blake said.

"Anime is art!"

"Aren't technically cartoons also art?" Jaune said.

"Anime is different, okay?!"

"Why are you acting like a cringy nerd?" Yang said.

"I don't know. I guess you're right. Also the correct term is weeaboo."

"What is a weeaboo?" Ruby said.

"That's a nice question. Let's watch this video to answer your question."

And done. Next chapter is Weeaboos by Filthy Frank. Like, follow and review.

Also, don't except any new chapters these two months because I'll be studying for the most imporant exam of my life, literally. See you in June.