Cpov
'Ok, first things first.' I thought as I walked through the camp, my head down at my eyes averted from anyone that came near me. 'Don't panic. You need to keep calm. You might be jumping to conclusions. For all you know, you might not be the only one this has happened to. Maybe something is going on with the entire cabin. It might have nothing to do April or you…'
I pulled my hood up farther as I passed a couple of sisters from the Hermes cabin, hoping they wouldn't notice me.
I wasn't that lucky.
By the whispers I caught as I hurried away, they hadn't recognized me. But they did think it was weird that the 'new kid' was wearing a hoodie in the middle of the summer.
'Ok,' I thought trying to focus on something, anything to keep my thoughts straight. 'Ok. This is good. They didn't recognize you. No one suspects anything…'
I went to run my fingers through my hair, only to remember most of it was gone. Cut brutally short into almost non-existence over the night.
I tried to push away the memory of my reflection in the mirror, force it out of my mind, but it wouldn't budge. Acne scars, giant ears, uneven teeth… It was as if whatever had happened to me, had taken all of my features and altered them, some were exaggerated, others were just off. Each time I thought about it, I noticed another flaw.
'Focus Cass,' I thought shaking my head and avoiding the eyes of yet another group of campers. 'You need to figure out what happened. You need someone's help.'
My first thought was April, but I immediately dismissed it. 24 hours ago, she might have been the one I would have gone to, but I had a feeling even if she wasn't behind what was going on, she wouldn't be all too happy to help.
As I walked, I went through a mental list, trying to think of people I might be able to go to to try and figure out what to do next. I came up with nothing. Just yesterday I might have been the one to go for about information around camp, but I didn't want anyone to see me like this. What would they say?
Part of me wanted to believe that they would want to help me, but I had a feeling if April was behind this, it wouldn't be that simple. I knew I'd pissed a lot of people off by hurting her. She was pretty well liked around camp and last night I'd probably made a few enemies, not to mention now that I was no longer in her good graces, I was pretty sure Broderick might consider it open season on all things related to Cassian Holt. That was a problem I would like to avoid.
I paused in the shade of a beech tree a bit away from the cabins and thought. I couldn't stay hidden forever. It was hot and eventually I'd have to take this hoodie off, but still, I couldn't let people see me like this. What should I do?
I thought for several minutes, but could only come to one conclusion. I couldn't go to friends, not with this. I'd have to go to my siblings, but honestly, that prospect was almost worse.
If I was worried about what the camp might think about my current appearance, what were my brothers and sisters going to say? They didn't like it if you didn't brush your hair before leaving the cabin, what would they say to me if I turned up to them looking like this?
'It's not permeant.' I thought, or maybe hoped. 'You'll be fine. Just get a better picture of what you're dealing with and they'll help you decide what to do from there.'
I stalled for a bit longer mainly because the thought was so unpleasant, but eventually I knew I had to do something. I decided to look for Angela. When it came to appearance, she might have been the most judgmental person on the planet, but she was also the sibling I was on best terms with. Probably the person in camp I was on best terms with really. She cared about me. Hopefully more than she cared about how I looked. I'd found throughout my life, that wasn't a luxury I had with most people.
Sticking to the shadows, it took a while for me to find her, even longer to find a moment when she was alone, but I finally caught her on her way towards the strawberry fields.
She'd just made it past the Big House and for once, there were no other campers in sight. She walked passed me, clearly without noticing but when I reached for her shoulder to get her attention, I found I hesitated again. I didn't want to do this.
But I had to, and now might be my only chance.
"Ang." I said quietly.
She stopped, obviously recognizing my voice, when she turned however, I caught her expression. I'll never forget the look she gave me.
The thing about being attractive, is people give you the benefit of the doubt. They want to like you, and they want to be liked by you. Is it fair? No. But that's just the way things are. People automatically want to think you're a good person, and they're willing to give you their time no matter what you're really like. I'd never had a problem getting things from someone. I could tell it wouldn't be that easy this time.
"What do you want?" she asked. Subtext, why is someone like you talking to someone like me?
Her expression was irritated and her tone was unkind. It was clear she didn't recognize me, even more so, that at face value, she didn't think I was worth her time.
"Ang." I said feeling a stab of shock and something close to pain go through me. She really didn't recognize me. "It's me."
Another blow went through me as her eyebrows shot up.
"Am I supposed to know what you mean by that?" She asked harshly. She had no idea who I was.
"It's me." I repeated, not really knowing what else to say. "Cassian."
At this she let out a derisive laugh.
"Right. You're Cass."
She rolled her eyes and turned, continuing to walk towards the fields.
"Ang, it really is me."
"Leave me alone dude." She said sounding irritated again.
"But-"
"Go bother someone else."
I stared after her, utterly dumbfounded. She didn't believe me, the one person in the camp I was sure would help, and she wanted nothing to do with me.
I didn't know what to do. She was walking away and I had to think of something fast.
Not knowing what else to say, I blurted.
"Last summer when we were cleaning the stables, you tripped and landed face first in the mud in one of the stalls. You said if I told anyone you'd get Broderick and his siblings to tie me to a tree in the forest and let the monsters get to me."
She froze and turned back to look at me, her eyes wide in shock.
"How do you know that?" she asked suspiciously. "No one else was there."
"I was there." I said. "It's me."
She frowned for a moment as she stared, clearly unconvinced, but slowly, I could see the change in in her eyes. They went from suspicion to horror as they realized the truth.
"Cass?" she asked quietly.
I nodded.
"Cass, what… what happened to you?"
Her tone was stunned, disbelief evident on her face. I found it didn't improve my mood, only fueled the barely controlled panic I was trying to suppress.
"I'm not sure." I said shaking my head. "That's what I'm trying to figure out, but I think April's behind it."
"That would make sense." She said quietly and there was a silence between us that was heavy. She clearly didn't know what to say and I realized this wouldn't be as easy as I thought.
"I need your help." I said eventually.
I could tell by her expression this made her uncomfortable. She glanced over her shoulder in an automatic motion, as if unaware of what she was doing and a cold sense of dread went through me as I realized what it meant. She was looking for other campers. She didn't want to be seen with me.
"What exactly do you want me to do?" she asked hesitantly.
The motion had hurt, but I knew didn't have time to dwell on it. I decided to ignore it for now.
"Ask around, see if you can get any information about what happened to me, who's behind it. Like I said, I think it was April but I'm not sure. I'd do it myself but…"
I let my voice trail off and she nodded, seeming to understand. I didn't want to be seen like this, she wouldn't have either.
There was another pause, this one more awkward than the first and I had to break it.
"So." I said quietly. "Will you do it?"
Her expression was conflicted and for one, heart breaking second, I thought she was going to say no. But her eyes met mine, and her gaze softened. It still took a moment, but eventually she took a deep breath and nodded.
"Yeah." She said sounding tired. "Yeah. I'll ask around. See if we can figure out what's going on."
"Thank you."
"In the meantime. What are you going to do?" she asked.
"Try to stay out of sight." I said desolately. "Maybe I'll go to the Big House. See if I can find any records of something like this happening."
"Alright." She said with a nod. "I'll see you later."
"Yeah."
She gave me one last look, apparently wanting to say something. I waited but nothing came out. She simply shook her head and turned back to the strawberry fields leaving me on my own.
I waited a few seconds, wondering what she wanted to say but decided I shouldn't dwell on it. If I was here much longer I was bound to run into someone and I didn't want that. So, glad it was the weekend and I didn't have any activities I had to report to, I made my way towards the Big House, avoiding the eyes of other campers and hiding under my hood.
….
I spent my entire day in the Big House, more specifically the attic. I didn't like the attic, it was dark, hot, filled with spider webs, and significantly creepy, but there was a lot up here and people rarely visited. I wanted to be alone and if there was any place that might have a random record filed away that might be able to help me, it would be here.
I tore through boxes and crates, reading any book or scroll I came across trying to find anything that might help me in my situation, but so far, I'd come up empty.
I was tired and I was hungry, but I was ignoring my stomach. Food meant the Dining Pavilion and there was no way I was going there.
I was going through the last box when I heard steps climbing up to the attic.
I looked over my shoulder to see a blonde figure emerge into the dimly lit room. It was Angela.
"I thought I'd find you up here." She said her nose wrinkling as she caught sight of a pickled hydra head. "Gods it's freaky. Any luck?"
"No." I said frowning. "You?"
She side stepped a battered shield, picking her way across the cluttered room over to me.
I could tell she was uncomfortable in the room, even more so by my altered appearance, but she ignored it and launched into her report.
"Well, I asked around like you said." She said with a sigh her eyes landing on mine. "And, well, do you want the good news or the bad news?"
"I guess good." I said troubled by her expression.
"The good news is you were right. April managed to curse you. Not very many people were in on it, but I got it out of one of her sisters."
"What's the bad news?" I asked wondering how bad it could be if the good news was that I'd been cursed.
"Well." She said a little awkwardly. "I have no idea how to lift it, and I can't find anyone who's willing to help."
"Did you talk to April about it?"
"What are you nuts? Of course I didn't." she said giving me an incredulous look. "And I don't think you should either. The impression I got from her siblings was that she's still pretty pissed."
"There's gotta be someone who's willing to help."
"That's where things get worse." She said quietly.
"Worse?" I asked indignantly. "How could things possibly get worse?"
"April covered her bases." She continued. "People have noticed you haven't been around today. After the fight last night, they know something's up but they don't know what. Word around camp is, Broderick and his siblings have been going around threatening people. A lot of people were already on Aprils side after what happened. Now they're worried if they side with you, the Ares kids are going to go after them."
"This is insane." I said shaking my head, a hallow sense of horror creeping through me.
I sat on a nearby crate, putting my head in my hands. How could this be happening to me?
"So what do I do?" I asked feeling panic set in again. "I can't go around like this forever."
I had no idea how long the curse would last, if it even had a time limit. For all I knew this was permanent until I somehow got it removed.
"There's only one thing I can really think of." She said quietly and I looked up at her.
"What is it?"
"You have to find Mom."
There was a moment where neither of us spoke. I could see her line of thinking and it made sense. The curse had altered my appearance, my mother's powers heavily influenced a person's looks. There was a chance that she could over power the curse but the problem was, we didn't often know where she was. The Gods were fickle, they rarely stayed in the same place for very long especially when they were in the mortal world and my mother spent a lot of time here.
"How am I supposed to do that?" I asked and she shrugged.
"I dunno." She said. "You can try to contact her, but you know how often she responds."
"Ang, that could take weeks. I won't last in the mortal world that long."
I wasn't a strong fighter, and outside the boundaries of the camp were monsters eager to find demigods like me. I didn't even have a weapon.
"I'm going to need help." I concluded. "I'll need someone to come with me."
I expected her to agree, even to offer some names of people she thought I should ask but she didn't. She didn't say anything, and I found I didn't like the expression she was giving me.
"What?" I asked confused. Why was she looking at me like that?
"Cass, I don't know what to tell you." she said softly. "I don't think anyone is going to come with."
"What do you mean? I've got plenty of friends."
For the second time today, Angela gave me a look I'd never forget. It took me a while to place, but she looked sad, and also a little sorry for me. No one had ever looked at me like that before and it took seconds before I realized what it was. When I did, I almost didn't believe it. It was pity.
"What?" I asked. Why did she feel sorry for me? I mean, yeah, I'd been cursed, but I had a plan. I was going to deal with it.
"Do you Cass?" she asked hesitantly and I was confused.
"Do I what?"
"Do you have friends?" she asked quietly.
I stared at her for a second, thinking this was a joke. When her expression didn't change however, and she kept silent, I was almost incensed.
"Of course, I have friends Ang." I said irritated. "You hang out with them."
She was still giving me that sorrowful look that I was starting to find intolerable. There was no reason to feel sorry for me. I'd figure this out and things would go back to the way they always were. I'd be attractive, I'd be popular. I was the last person who needed sympathy.
"Who exactly do you think is going to go with you?" she asked, injecting a note of common sense into her tone. "Broderick's made it pretty clear he's not going to let anyone help you, do you really think anyone is going to want to deal with that? For you?"
I thought for a moment, names and faces flitting in and out of my mind, none of them sticking.
"I-" I started but when she raised an eyebrow, I cut myself off.
"Cass," she said her voice gentle, but firm all the same. "I think you're on your own."
Her words hit me like a hammer, echoing inside my mind like an empty oil drum as a wave of hopelessness washed over me. She was right. I knew none of my friends would help me, not if it meant dealing with Broderick. And while I knew my siblings might want to help me, none of us were exactly great in the arena. Leaving camp for them would be just as dangerous as it was for me, and in the end, there was no guarantee that we'd even find my mother. That this was something we could fix. They'd be putting themselves in danger for something we didn't know could even be achieved. Who would do that?
"I told you not to push Broderick." She said with a groan as if she could hear the thoughts going through my head. "Why did you have to be so mean to April? To everyone? Why do you always have to push people away?"
I shook my head and put it back in my hands, closing my eyes. This couldn't be happening.
There was a pause where neither of us spoke, but eventually, I felt her give my shoulder a squeeze.
"I'm sorry." She said softly. "I wish I could help but..."
She seemed to run out of words however, because few moments later, I heard footsteps retreating from the attic and I found that once again I was alone.
I wasn't sure how long I sat there, my thoughts sluggish and slow as I realized the situation I was in. She was right, no one was going to help. I was alone.
The words repeated in my mind, getting louder each time, more painful.
I was alone.
I was alone.
I was alone.
No one was going to help me. I'd made sure of that by my attitude. Angela was right, all I'd ever done was push people away. Sure, I might be able to get what I wanted, charm people when I needed to but that was when I had the looks to get away with it. But that was gone and it wasn't until now that I really realized how well and truly pathetic that was.
What was I going to do? I had no one. If I stepped out into camp and people had saw what happened to me, there was nothing to stop them for laughing in my face. My only weapon was gone. What was stopping all the people I'd pissed off from turning me into a total outcast? A pariah?
Suddenly, I sat up, an idea sparking in the back for my mind. One so obvious, I wasn't sure why I hadn't thought of it before.
Angela was wrong. I wasn't alone.
There was someone who might help me. Who wouldn't care about what the rest of the camp thought because she'd never cared.
I stood so fast, I got a head rush that made me dizzy. I swayed for a second, and almost stumbled into a suit of armor. Quickly righting myself, I rushed to the door of the attic, racing through the Big House and out the front door.
Evelyn wouldn't care about Broderick and his threats, she was more than a match for him, and she always helped someone when they needed it.
But where was she?
I glanced at my watch. It was almost dinner time. If I was lucky I might catch her in her cabin. Hopefully she'd be alone.
But after five minutes of knocking at the Hades cabin, I was forced to conclude she wasn't there.
I searched several places in camp, not caring who saw me, hoping people wouldn't make the connection as I checked her usual spots. The arena, the climbing wall, and several other areas came up empty. Finally, not really sure why, I made my way to the beach.
She was there, but she wasn't alone.
It looked like most of the Underworld kids were gathered here. They were standing together talking, but she'd separated from the group and was looking over the Sound.
I knew things hadn't been great between us recently, but when I realized what she was doing, hope flared within me. She was looking at the waves.
"Hey Ev! Back up a little!" Micah called. "You're making me nervous that close to the water!"
She looked over her shoulder at her friends, but grinned when she saw them waving her over.
She jogged back to them, and it struck me as strange to seem them like this. Laughing and hanging out together. Usually they were all so tense. It took me a second to realize why, but I figured it out. There were no other campers here. Up until now, they'd always been on their guard, on edge, but at the moment they were totally relaxed. Right now, they weren't the Underworld campers. They just looked like regular kids.
Would that change once they realized I was here?
Knowing there was nothing for it, I took a deep breath and stepped out on the sand, approaching the group.
Micah was the first to spot me.
His arm was around his girlfriend and he'd been laughing at something she'd said. Immediately the laughter died. His eyes narrowed and tension entered the group as they turned to see what he was looking at.
"Who are you?" he asked harshly and I froze.
I could sense their unease as they looked at me. Some people like Micah, looked suspicious and I could see why. They hadn't recognized me, in their minds, an unknown camper was approaching them and they had no idea why. This didn't often happen and some of them, Maya in particular, looked wary but a little curious as well.
Evelyn however, was neither. Her eyes were narrowed, but not hostile. She looked a little confused.
"Hey," Micah snapped, clearly irritated and calling my attention back to him. "Are you deaf? What do you want?"
All of the sudden, a thrill of fear shot through me. This was the moment of truth. They didn't know who I was yet. I could turn around and try to figure something else out. Where as just a few minutes ago I was certain of this plan, now I wasn't sure I was ready to commit.
I'd been so happy I'd thought of a solution to my situation, I hadn't thought it through. But these kids weren't my friends. The only person I had a relationship here with was Evelyn, and she wasn't very happy with me right now.
Did I want to do this?
The decision was taken out of my hands however, when I looked back to Evelyn. Her eyes met mine, and immediately her expression changed. I was horrified to see a glint of recognition in her eyes, but before I could do or say anything, she'd spoken. Her voice was hesitant, as was her expression, but her eyes were sure.
"Cass?" she asked quietly.
