The day after. Oh, this will be fun, I promise. :)
TIME FOR CHAPTER NIIIIINE.
"Hi all, and welcome to the Caprice Finds Two Hung Over People in Bed Game!" Caprice yelled.
She walked all the way to end of the hallway, and then began smiling.
"Now, in Door #1, we are bound to find something funny," Caprice said. "Do we want to open the door?"
"Open it, open it!" the peanut gallery screamed.
"NO DEAL!" one random audience member screamed.
"Hey, man, that show is in the other studio." A random audience member nagged.
"Oh," the member said, "this is kind of awkward."
"Can I open the damn door already?" Caprice yelled.
"YES!" the audience screamed.
"Alright!" Caprice smiled.
She opened the door, and gave a horrific look.
"What the hell?" Caprice exclaimed.
"Hi!" a girl yelled out. "My name is Mary!"
"Hi!" a boy yelled out. "My name is Gary!"
"My luver and me did baad tings last nite." Mary said.
"Yea, even thogh wer both thirteen year-ols!" Gary added.
"Am I am super sugar high annoying girl!" Mary yelled in Caprice's ear.
"Yes," Caprice said holding her ear. "Now get out of my sight."
"Let's run outside nekkid!" Gary yelled.
"Okay!" Mary agreed. "Let's get married too."
"And I thought Salacia was bad." Caprice muttered.
"I HEARD THAT!" Salacia screamed from her room.
Caprice smiled like nothing happened, and kicked the next door with her foot several times. She stopped, and then began to speak.
"Now, for Door #2." Caprice said. "Does anyone want to guess what's in here?"
"A fat chick?" some random guy yelled.
"No, two fat chicks!" another guy yelled.
"Underwear!" some kid yelled.
Caprice smacked her forehead and shook her head until she couldn't stop hearing the stupid guesses.
"Your mom?" another kid suggested.
"Shut up, Shut up, SHUT UP!" Caprice yelled.
The audience was quiet. A couple of crickets chirped. Caprice gave an uneasy smile, and then opened the door.
"Oh my g..." Caprice started to say.
Caprice stood there with her mouth hanging open.
"Hi friend!" Salacia greeted.
"Aren't you supposed to be hung over?" Caprice asked.
"No." Salacia replied.
"Then who was that who passed out last night?" Caprice asked.
"My stunt double." Salacia answered.
"Salacia," Caprice asked. "do you even know what a stunt double is?"
"Duh," Salacia replied. "Don't you watch those gay Pepsi commercials? Oh, Diet Pepsi, you look so good in that stunt even though it doesn't even remotely like you. HAHA Look, we are hardcore cause we made fun of Coke!"
Caprice just stared at Salacia for a short amount of time, and then walked over to Door 3.
"Hopefully the people in this door didn't completely ruin this game." Caprice said.
"We want to see some action!" one man yelled out.
"Girl on Girl!" another man yelled.
Caprice shook her head, and then opened the door. There were two girlish screams, one coming from Caprice, and the other from the person inside. She slammed the door shut as fast as possible, and stood their with a disturbed look.
"Just saw Silence shaving?" Salacia asked while she ate an apple.
Caprice shook her head slowly in the yes position. Salacia put her arm around Caprice shoulders.
"Just think of it this way," Salacia said. "there are plenty of things much worse than see that."
"Like...?" Caprice asked.
"Hmmm..." Salacia said. "Well, reading Spongebob Squarepants fiction rated Mature, anything related to "The King" from those Burger King commercials, watching Teletubbies without being high, Joan Rivers, walking in on your parents, Galbatorix singing the thong song, Galbatorix singing the thong song in a tho..."
"Okay, okay, I get the picture, there are plently of things worse than that." Caprice said. "Where in the hell did you get that apple?"
"From that tree with the snake over there." Salacia pointed.
---
"Hey, little girl." The snake said. "do you want an apple?"
"Sure," Salacia said. "I'm hungry as hell."
The snake gave Salacia the apple, and she put it near her mouth.
"Hope you ee-eenjoy that apple." The snake said.
Salacia's eyes began huge.
"HOLY SHIT, a talking snake!" she yelled.
Then Salacia proceeded with hitting the snake with a stick lying next to the tree. She stopped until the snake stopped moving, and then walked off with her apple. The snake ascended into heaven, and looked down at the tree.
"I ss-ssshould get rid of that damn twig." The snake said. "That's the ss-ssixth time this week."
"Don't worry, Mr. Snake," one of the seven dwarves reassured.
"Ss-sshut up, Dopey," the snake yelled. "You know, there's a reason why they call you that?"
"Let's be best friends!" Dopey said.
"Damn you Walt Disney!" the snake yelled.
---
"Well, I wonder what disturbing thing is in Door #4?" Caprice said to the audience. "Let's find out!"
Caprice opened the door, to find Galbatorix sleeping in bed, next to something covered in sheets.
"He...did...not...get...laid." Caprice said. "Oh my god, the poor woman who slept with him."
"You mean, man, as in Quaker Oat Man." Salacia said.
Caprice lifted the sheet, to see the Quaker Oat man. She proceeded in laughing her ass for a good five minutes, before she proceeded in embarrassing them.
"Wake up Galbatorix!" Salacia said. "There's a sale on cutlery objects!"
Galbatorix still slept soundless in bed. Salacia crossed her arms and pouted.
"Hey, Galbatorix," Caprice whispered. "There's a sale on silk panties. I know you like those because you have several pairs in your underwear drawer."
Caprice rolled her eyes. "He's a dunce."
An evil grin emerged from Salacia face, and she whispered in Galbatorix ear.
"Galbatorix, if you don't wake up," Salacia whispered. "Caprice said she won't have your babies."
Galbatorix sat up straight in bed, running into Salacia's nose. Salacia held her nose, and started swearing. Caprice started laughing really hard and pointing. Galbatorix began to look at Caprice with a predatory look, and she stopped laughing. Soon after, she ran out of the room screaming, and Galbatorix ran out of the room, without remembering that he was naked. A censor was placed over his package, so no one was disturbed.
"Salacia, I hate you!" Caprice screamed.
Salacia laid on the floor laughing really hard. Then she heard a yawn, and stood back up.
"He doesn't want a commitment, right?" The Quaker Oatmeal man said.
"Sorry, I don't think so." Salacia said.
"I always pick the jerks." He replied.
Then he got dressed and left the room.
"Talking to the Quaker Oatmeal guy about sex," Salacia said. "Yeah, that was just added to my list of disturbing things."
Thank you for the reviews. I am really glad that you guys liked chapter 8, because it was SO fun to write. :) :gives candy: But anyway, keep the reviews coming in!
Until next time...see you later!
