This chap is a filler! Yeah, I know how stupid these are, but it seemed necessary, because... well, this story is hard to write without FAX! I was listening to depressing music when I wrote it, so it might be... depressing! And Max was stolen from me for the day by a friend, so... She's not here to comment. :( That means I have to do this all by myself. Which means I'm probably rambling now, and so I better shut up... :S

As always, read away!

[song excerpt: Last To Know - Three Days Grace and Thinking Of You - Katy Perry]



12 years ago

Fang POV

She just walked away

Why didn't she tell me?

And where do I go tonight?

This isn't happening to me

This can't be happening to me

She didn't say a word

Just walked away

I slammed my iPod into the wall. What was going through Max's head? Why did she leave? How could she leave!?

I fell to the floor slowly, and held my head with my hands. So many questions, no answers. She didn't even right a note, she didn't even say goodbye. She just left.

That was two years ago. Two years, and I haven't heard anything from her. Zip. Nada. Zilch. Nothing.

It was if Max had just disappeared one day, off the face of the earth, and no one, except Dr. M, maybe, knew what had happened to her.

I didn't want to hate her mom, but she was definitely keeping facts from me, even now. I was 18. I could take whatever she'd tell me. But noooo.

I hated everything that reminded me of Max with a fiery passion. My mind was always at a different place, a different time, when Max had been here, had held my hand, had whispered "I love you" in my ear, had kissed me, had wanted to kill any girl who had ever looked at me.

But she left. I remembered that day like it had happened yesterday. It was constantly replaying in my mind.


-Flashback-

I walked into Dr. M's house, surprised by the silence. The living room was empty, but I heard muffled crying in the kitchen. I slowly walked towards it, and glanced in.

This was the first time I had seen Max's mom cry. But what little make up she had on was smeared, and her head was covered by her hands. She looked up, and jumped when she saw me. Her face twisted with anger, but then she sighed.

"What's... wrong?" I asked slowly, as I sat down at the table. Dr. Martinez sighed again, and took a sip of her coffee.

"Max is gone." It took me a couple seconds to comprehend that, to realize what she had just told me.

"What?" I muttered, and looked up from where I was staring, dumbfounded, at the table. "Why?"

"I can't... I can't tell you. I promised her that." It felt like someone had just stabbed my chest, taken out my heart, stomped on it with cleats, and then put it back in. It left a gaping hole. Dr. M broke the silence.

"She wanted me to tell you... that she loved you. With all her heart. But she has to leave." I shook my head slowly. "She also told me about... certain things. That I wasn't so proud to hear about." I glanced up at her, and she was glaring at me.

"Like... what?" I ventured, hating every second that passed in which Max wasn't here. The intensity of her stare deepened.

"I think you know what." She snapped, and stood, starting to pace.

"But... why would she leave?" I whispered to myself, and tried to shake the millions of thoughts from my mind. I stood, and walked out the front door. The second I was outside, I started getting a running start. Then, when I had gotten fast enough, I jumped, and snapped out my wings.

Max, Max, Max... Why?

-End Flashback-



Max POV (Still 12 years ago)

Life without Fang wasn't a life I wanted to live, but I forced myself to get up in the morning, to greet the day with a smile.

I still had someone to live for, if I couldn't have Fang.

I walked over to the small crib in my bedroom. Nikki was sound asleep, her black hair strewn across the pillows, her tiny little mouth open, snoring softly. I smiled, trying to hold back tears.

Two long years had passed since I had left. Nikki was almost 15 months old, and every day, she seemed to act more and more like me, and to look more and more like Fang. The resemblance to him in her physical features was startling. The few times my mom had seen her, she had laughed at that. Surprised to see that she had grown so quickly, and how long her hair had gotten. The few times I tried to have it cut, she had thrown a huge fit, and so I left it long.

Nikki had started talking when she was almost a year old. Her vocabulary now consisted of: "Momma", "Wha?", "Nigh nigh", "Owchy!" "S[h]ush pwease!" (the h disappeared every once in a while), "No!", "Granma", "Book!", and others. She also loved to scream. And I mean scream, not squeal.

But her attitude! Gosh! It was like trying to raise me, and it absolutely sucked sometimes. But it had it's advantages, like watching her sleep. No wonder Fang used to watch me for hours as I slept. Nikki was just so... so adorable.

She stirred in her slumber, and mumbled some incoherent words.

I wished Fang could be here, to stand next to me, smiling, his arm around my waist, as we watched her sleep.

But I made the stupid mistake of leaving, of refusing to talk to him, of not telling him goodbye. Because if I told him goodbye, he'd force why I was leaving out of me, and then he'd force me not to leave.

He wouldn't hate me, like I thought. He wouldn't be mad, he wouldn't... do anything. He'd just stare at me, with his mask of a face, and mutter something like, "Well, this sucks.", and we'd find a way to get through it. We wouldn't have to fight about it; we'd just adapt to the circumstances.

Iggy probably wouldn't have been surprised, Ella would freak out and start punching Fang for even having sex with me in the first place, Nudge would immediately start thinking about baby clothes, Gazzy would tell me he wanted a boy, so he could have someone else to make bombs with. Angel would smile at me, since she had known all along. Mom would be completely outraged, like she was when I first told her, but she wouldn't be mad for long. Nikki was her first "grandbaby". Whenever she saw her, she tried to spoil her as much as she could. It was cute.

And everyone would live happily ever after.

God, I hated my head sometimes. It was so... anti-Max. It made me hate myself, and I hated that feeling.

So much hate... Nikki was the only thing that brought me through.

I sighed, and ran my hand through my hair. I glanced at the clock. 3:09am was what it screamed at me, so I slowly headed back to bed.


Flash... Forward? 9 years ago.

When I'm with him I am thinking of you

Thinking of you, what you would do

If you were the one who was spending the night

Oh, I wish that I was looking into your eyes

Craig always tried to get me into bed with him. Whether it was just to make out, or to do more.

But my head was somewhere else, and in it, I wasn't kissing Craig. I wasn't seeing his blonde hair, his blue eyes. I wasn't wrapping my arms around his neck.

In my head, I was smirking up at dark eyes. In my head, my hands were tangled in long black hair. In my head, I was seeing Fang, everything that I remembered about him, and all of his dreadful scars. I had a fare share of my own, but his were much worse. The last time I had seen him, the scars from my deceased half brother still traced his chest. But that was 4 years ago, and now Craig was the only one who was there for me.

He didn't care about the wings; he actually thought they were cute. He was so different than Fang, and it helped me wake up from my head. It helped me realize I was living now, not 4 years ago. It helped me focus on Craig. Not Fang. Craig would never be Fang, but Fang would never be Craig. They were so different, but were both obsessed with one thing: me. It was cute with Craig, though. He always spent time with me, but I always spent time with him. I didn't want to be alone; didn't want to fall asleep by myself, when all the memories would sneak up on me, and then fill my head like little termites wanting every little bit of space.

But Fang would always be my first love, the best love I'd ever have, and the most painful breakup.


And there ya go! The ending was a little depressing. Anyway... Review please! Fred wants to be tickled!

Reviews [are greater than] Dylan's face.