A/N: Okay, I really love this story. So I am adding another chapter prior to this one. But then I am calling it quits. I don't want to ruin it by adding random chapters. But I am very glad that everyone has enjoyed it so much!
Alice POV:
Rosalie and I were shoved roughly into a jail cell. There was a wooden bed dangling from two chains at the end of the cell. It was very obvious that only one person would fit on it. Rosalie turned her nose up at the completely unsanitary toilet at the other end of the small space. Not that we would ever need to go to the bathroom, but this place was very disgusting and . . . well . . . not very well taken care of.
The whole place reeked of alcohol and human sweat. There was some raucous laughing and wolf-whistling in the cell next to us. If I was going to be stuck in a disgusting place like this, the smallest thing that I would ask for is just an ounce of peace and quiet. And maybe some manners, I mentally tacked on with another disapproving glance at the men in the cell to my left.
I glanced at the police officer's name tag, just before he walked away. Benjamin Daughertie, it read. Rosalie came over next to me, her eyes sliding over his badge as well. Then, she turned to me, a mischievous smile on her face. "Watch this," she whispered.
This is going to be humiliating, I thought. Extremely humiliating.
I watched through narrowed eyes as Rosalie flipped her hair over her shoulders, positioning it so her loose, blonde curls would hang down the way she wanted them. She straightened her outfit, so that her top was tight along her torso, putting extra emphasis around her chest area. She pulled out some blood red lipstick and reapplied it. I rolled my eyes as she fluffed her hair out once more.
"Oh, Benjamin?" she called, her voice intentionally seductive. The confused police officer turned around, eyes wide with shock and surprise. Rosalie began to strut towards the cell bars with exaggerated slowness, now that his attention was caught. She stuck her hand between the bars and gestured with one finger for him to come over. Then, she winked.
That just about threw him overboard. He stared at her for a moment, and blinked a few times to figure out whether Rosalie was actually standing there speaking directly to him. Idiotically, he looked around the room, trying to find another man coincidentally named Benjamin. He pointed at his chest and mouthed, "Me?"
"Yes, you. Who else is in the room, silly?" Rosalie said, attempting to make her voice sound flirtatious. His face paled and a thin sheen of sweat began to form on his abnormally large forehead and nose.
I sighed and stared up at the stone gray ceiling. "Oh good grief," I muttered.
"So? Do you have a girlfriend, Ben-ja-min?" she asked, splitting his name into three words. I caught him as he glanced at the ringed finger on his left hand. He threw it behind his back and shook his head, still incapable of speaking.
Rosalie giggled. "Well, how about you let me out of this jail cell then? I'll do you a little favor if you do," she bribed. The police officer stared back at her in complete silence for a solid minute; it looked like he had even stopped breathing for a period of time.
"You're insane," I murmured, still staring helplessly at the ceiling.
Benjamin's purple face turned towards the hallway perpendicular to our cell. He backed up, craning his neck to the side to get a better look to see if the coast was clear. And then - this was sure as hell one of the funniest things I had ever seen - he hurried over to the side of his wooden desk, trying his damndest to move stealthily. And with his large, round, beach ball like figure, it was next to impossible to even look agile.
He threw a drawer open, nearly falling over in his haste. The cell next to us had gone completely quiet as we all stared at him, trying to hold back laughter. He pulled out a huge ring filled with hundreds of keys. As he studied the numbers on the keys, little drops of sweat began to drip from his nose, forehead, and chin. Rosalie wrinkled her nose in disgust, and it was then that I saw what she had originally been planning. I know knew why his dripping sweat had disgusted her so much; it made her plan a hundered times more revolting.
Now that the rapidly-perspiring Benjamin Daughertie had found the correct key, he jammed it into the metal lock. And with a click, the door swung open. Rosalie walked out of the cell first; she glanced over her shoulder at me and winked in a take-that sort of way. I stuck my tongue out at her and she rolled her eyes.
I followed her towards the hallway that led to the front door, but froze as I noticed she was getting ready to just walk out of the building. Rosalie was forgetting something. "What about that favor?" Benjamin asked, hurt.
I grinned and put my hands on my hips as Rosalie paused, mid-step. "Yeah, Rosalie. What about that 'little favor' you promised this decent man?" I winked at the stunned police officer. He was going to have his fun. I wanted my fair share of amusement, too.
"Oh, shut up, Alice," Rosalie muttered, her eyes flashing angrily. I was really enjoying this.
Even though she had no desire to continue her original plan, she stepped towards Benjamin in a reluctant sort of way. She masked her disgusted face with a flirtatious expression. Benjamin relaxed. "May I call you Ben?" she asked.
He shook his head. "Not without the favor."
I saw what he was planning as soon as the words left his mouth. I side-stepped quickly towards Rosalie and leaned in to whisper in her ear. "He will call security if you don't. I know what you had planned; it's gross, but you promised him. Just get it over with. I want to get the hell out of here and I'm sure you do too."
And then, Rosalie was standing over him, her mouth pressed up against his. Benjamin wrapped his arms around Rosalie's waist, holding her there. She squeezed her eyes shut in revoltion and tried to unlock his hands from behind her waist. We both knew that it was very possible to get herself out of this; her strength could have knocked him off in seconds. But it was very unnatural and she would end up framing us in front of the people in the cell and in front of a police officer.
Poor Benjamin was knocked up against the wall with Rosalie's hands around his wrists to assure that his hands didn't move any lower. I giggled, slapping my hand over my mouth as I experienced her true dread. She deserved it and I was really enjoying her punishment.
Of course, making out with a sweat covered and lusty police officer was definitely a bad enough consequence. But the next thing that happened was just way too much. These split decisions were really starting to get on my every last nerve.
Jasper and Emmett were standing on the other end of the hallway, watching Rosalie with their mouths wide open in utter shock and bewilderment. Emmett snapped his teeth together with an audible click. "Rosalie Lillian Hale," he said in a livid and shaky voice.
In an instant, Rosalie straightened up, shoving Benjamin backwards into the wall, her eyes wide. She turned towards Emmett, sliding her hand across her mouth, her face completely mortified. "Emmett, it's not what you think - "
"It's exactly what I think! I come in here to bail you out of jail to make up for what happened and you are going to town on that guy!"
Rosalie was at a complete loss for words. "No. I did it for a reason, I swear."
In the midst of their arguing, I glanced at Benjamin, totally forgetting about him for a moment. His eyes were distant, his mouth was open with red smears from Rosalie's extra coating of lipstick. He obviously had no clue what was going on. I shrugged and walked over to Jasper. His face was expressionless, which worried me the slightest bit.
I tried not to pay any attention to it. "Let's go, Jasper," I said with the biggest, innocent smile I could manage, reaching casually for his hand.
And, shockingly enough, he pulled away, taking a step back. "Kissed any guys lately?"
"No, I haven't," I snapped, offended.
"Sure. Whatever you say, Alice." He rolled his eyes at me, which stung a bit. Then, he took me by the shoulders and began guiding me back into the jail cell. I looked over his shoulder, panicking, to see that Emmett was doing the exact same thing to a protesting and violently cursing Rosalie.
"We'll show you what being locked up in our rooms was like," they both said simultaneously.
"What?! Emmett! Don't do this! I don't want to go back in there! It's gross! I'm perfectly innocent!" Rosalie shrieked. Emmett ignored her, and continued to press us both back into our unsanitary cage. And, before either of us could even attempt to escape, the door had been closed and locked.
"Have fun, ladies," Emmett said as he waved goodbye.
They both began to walk down the hallway, towards the front door. Rosalie and I immediately started screaming after them, but neither of them turned. Once we heard the click of a door closing shut, we were both silent for a moment.
Rosalie threw her hands up into the air. "Perfect," she muttered. "Just perfect."
I rolled my eyes and sat down on the floor in front of the bars. I crossed my arms tightly over my chest, trying to ignore the thought of how childish and immature I looked right now. Glaring up at Rosalie, I narrowed my eyes. "I blame you."
A/N: I doubt any of you picked up on this, but I based Benjamin Daughertie on Paul Blart, the mall cop. Hopefully that will make it ten times funnier. I got a good laugh out of the idea when I re-read this chapter. One chapter left! But I wouldn't have added this chapter in if it wasn't for the high demand to keep this fanfic going. I had fun writing this one, so thank you all so much for your support! I really appreciate it! Review and tell me what you guys thought!
