AN: Happy Valentine's Day my lovelies! I hope your day is filled with lots of love… Even though I don't participate in V-Day (commercial Holiday and such) I want everyone to feel loved today! Thanks why I put everything I was doing aside and got this out!

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Thanks. And have a great day!

Heads up this one is a little more graphic.


May

Derek walked into Penelope's office eager to get to work on their next item on the lists. So far, they had been kicking butt and taking names. Although, he had to admit some items were much harder than others. Every time he looked at his baby girl, he had to stifle a groan. Knowing that under her clothes, she had a certain gem, in a very strategic place, nearly made him lose control. Add on the gem being his birth stone? It nearly killed him.

In a weird way, it was as if the gem marked her as his. His claim.

Ever since the start of this comfort zone list, something had changed between them. There had always been a spark between them, but now it was as if they fully recognized it.

He knew by the end of this year; they were finally going to cross that line. Hell, it almost happened a few times already. He could bet his next paycheck, that by the time January first rolled around they'd be very much together.

"How ya doing, pretty mama?" he asked walking into her office.

"Ahh, if it isn't my night and shining armor. What can I do ya for, Hot Stuff?" she purred as she turned from her computer so face him.

"Oh, baby, you can do me for free," he answered. He walked over to her desk and perched himself on top.

"Don't tempt me." She smiled at him.

"So it's May. Do we want to get to work on the next items on the list?" he asked picking up a troll from her desk and playing with it.

Penelope turned back to her computer, not looking at him. He knew something was up. He cocked his head to the side and stared at her. He put the troll down.

"Penelope?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said not looking at him. "About that."

"Yeah, what about that?"

Penelope turned to him. "So I didn't think you'd want to do the next item I have on the list. So, I booked it myself."

At first he was taken aback. He couldn't help the hurt that washed over him. This was their thing and no matter what the item was. They were in this together.

"Pen, you know I'd do anything for you. Why are you gonna shut me out of this?"

"I'm not shutting you out. It's just, I don't know. It'll be weird to have you there."

"Garcia, I watched you get your clit pierced, do you really think anything-"

"You did what?"

Derek and Penelope both turned to see Reid standing at the doorway. His eyes as wide.

"Uhhh," Penelope tried to back track.

Derek couldn't help but laugh. Really of all the people that could have walked by, it was their innocent genius. "It's a grown-up thing, kid. Don't worry about it."

"He's not a kid," Penelope argued.

"Okay, fine." Derek turned to Reid. "Pen and I are completing a sexy bucket list that included hot wax and piercings. I was fortunate enough to watch her get her clit pierced. Guy even let me –"

Reid turned bright red. "I do not need to know what you two do in your spare time." He ran in handed Penelope some papers. "Hotch wants some info on this." And ran out.

"Why did you do that?" Penelope asked through gritted teeth.

"He asked," Derek answered. "Now. Stop holding out on me. What do we have planned?"

She took a few moments staring at him before sighing and opening he purse. She handed him a business card. "The workshop starts at 7:00 tonight."

He looked down at the card.

Learn how to please your partner with a sexy STRIP TEASE!

XXXX

Penelope paced in the waiting room right off the studio. She had gotten a message from Derek stating that he'd be there and she was not doing this alone.

This was so stupid. It was pretty much baiting him now. Yeah, their relationship had changed but no one would make the extra push. She was going to force his hand a little now. Mister dominate alpha was probably not going to like her stripping in front of a group of people. Especially with what she had on under she clothes.

Not if the reaction with Dante was to be true. Poor guy. Every time they showed up to his studio, Derek threatened Dante with even more pain.

How in the hell was Derek going to be able to handle this?

But, it's going to work out for her. She only put this on her list years ago to make her feel sexy. A part of her regretted it, but then again… alpha Derek was such a turn on.

The door chimed and she looked up so see Derek walking in wearing workout clothes with his workout bag in hand. "Uhh, Hot Stuff," she said. "This is a sexy class not a workout and run a mile class." She pointed to his outfit. "What's with the getup?"

Derek looked down at this clothes. "What did you want me to show up here wearing a Speedo?"

She closed her eyes and moaned. "Why, yes. Yes, that is exactly what I want you in."

Derek laughed. "You are such a naughty girl. And who are you to talk? You're wearing leggings and an oversized shirt."

"Ahh but it's what's under the shirt that counts." She winked at him.

She watched as his eyes go wide, before turning and heading into the studio.

"Welcome everyone!" The instructor said. "I know a lot of people take these types of classes for a workout, but here we want you to feel empowered and sexy for your partners and yourself. This is about you loving your body. In a way, it's like making love to yourself, and sharing that with your partner. A special show they get to watch just for them."

"Isn't this exciting?" Penelope whispered into his ear.

XXXX

Derek looked around. There were tons of people here, woman and men alike. Who would have thought men would be into this thing too? But then again, he was here too so he had no room to talk. "Yeah, Baby Girl, it is." He tried to sound as sincere as he could.

"Look at all the people. This is gonna be so much fun." He watched as she bounded up and down with excitement.

Oh, shit! The way her chest was moving he didn't think she was wearing a bra, or if she was it wasn't one for support.

FUCK!

Out of the corner of his eyes he could see some men looking directly at Penelope's chest.

He glared at them.

Back off, assholes! She's mine.

They must have gotten the message, because slowly they turned around.

"Now this is a completely judgement free zone. All we want is to help you feel sexy and empowered. That's all everyone wants here. No one is better than anyone else. We're know for our discreet atmosphere and our gender open classes. That being said if you ever feel uncomfortable at any time because of another person just let myself or one of the instructors know," the announcer said from the stage.

It wasn't a tall stage. Maybe only a foot, foot and a half high. On the stage, there was a chair and box. Nothing too exciting. Derek really didn't get what the big deal was.

"Alright," the instructor started again. "First I'm going to bring one of my staff on stage to show you what the class is about. Now, keep in mind Lilly, had been doing this for years. No one here expects you to do it exactly like her. This is just an example so you can get an idea of what type of workshop you signed up for."

With that Lilly, well her presumed it was Lilly, walked on stage. The lights dropped and sultry music started to play. He could feel the bass rocking through his body as color spot lights followed Lilly to the chair.

He knew he should have been expecting it. I mean, he was here to learn how to do a strip tease, but this was more than that. She was practically fucking herself on stage… Oh and then to his surprise, he finally found out what was in that box. There were props that could be used. Right now, Lilly had a feather boa wrapped around her naked chest.

Derek knew this was on Penelope's comfort zone list. He read it there. But he did not expect this. No, this went beyond a quick strip tease to please your partner. This was….

What the hell did he and Penelope sign up for?

"Wasn't that amazing?" the instructor said. Hoots, hollers, and whistles where the answer.

"Wow, Hot stuff," Penelope turned to him and said, "is it hot in here or is it just me?"

Before he could answer the instructor called for everyone's attention. "Can I get a volunteer?"

He didn't know what happened. One second Penelope was standing right next to him. The next she was on stage.

How in the HELL?

"And what's your name, sweetie?" the instructor asked.

Penelope's cheeks went red as she answered. "I'm Penelope."

"Oh," the instructor remarked. "Penelope is a sexy name. Don't you agree audience?"

More yells filled the room. Derek couldn't ignore the fact that one of the guys from before that was blatantly staring at his Penelope's chest, started screaming, "Take it off, Penelope!"

He was going to murder that guy.

"Alright, is this your first time?'

"Yes," Penelope answered. "But I'm sexy. I can do this!"

"Hell yes you are," that same asshole yelled.

Penelope blushed even more on stage.

"Okay, so how about we do this. First we are going to bring down the house lights and turn up the music. Let the rhythm flow through you get a feel for it. When you feel like your body is in charge, not your mind, take off your top. And if you're still feeling it we can continue or we can pull back and work form there. Okay?"

"Alright."

The house lights went down and the music started to play. Derek was in a tranced. Penelope started moving her body, like she was a born dancer. Lilly was good, he didn't dispute that, but what Penelope offered was so much more.

She swayed to the music. Turning around so her back was to the audience she looked over her shoulder and grabbed the sides of her top and slowly pulled it over her head. Her long blond curls bouncing on her back, falling back into place once the top was removed.

Derek was about to lose control. Thank god her wore his compression pants or everyone in the room would see how she tuned him on.

"You're a natural!" the instructor yelled over the music.

Penelope smiled as she continued to move to the rhythm. With her back still towards the audience she bent at her waist and slowly started to remove her leggings.

No! it was only supposed to be the top! Not the pants! NO ONE gets to see her like that but me!

"Take it off," the fucktwat yelled again.

This was too much for Derek. The sight of her on stage was snapping his control, but then add on all these people stating at his baby girl... Fuck this. He went to make his way onto the stage when, Penelope finally turned around.

He froze.

She was wearing some once piece contraption that crossed over her body barely covering her. There was the smallest- and he meant smallest- triangle that just barely covered her slit. There was way more flesh than material there and, he could swear the pieces of fabric that barely covered her nipples were larger than the one covering her pussy.

It was like she was there dancing only for him. Her eyes never left his. She was showcasing the love she had for her body and him. It was beyond sexy.

He needed to touch her, kiss her, make love to her. She was his and if anyone challenged him, he'd kill them.

"Penelope! We want more, take it off. Show us your pussy!"

Derek snapped out of his daze. That's right, they were not alone somewhere. And that fucking dickward was now making his way closer to the stage. Closer to his girl.

"Fuck this!" Derek parted the people in front of him and jumped onto the stage shielding her body from the view of the crowd.

He reached down and grabbed her clothes and threw Penelope over his shoulder.

"Has anyone ever told you, you have to share?" the annoying guy asked.

Derek was done. He jumped off the stage put Penelope onto the ground. Grabbed her shirt and put it on her. The next second he turned and was face to face with the dickwad himself. He couldn't stop himself, he decked him right in the face.

"Fuck you! You don't get to look at her!" Derek growled.

"Piss off man!" the guy who was now holding his nose shouted.

Derek didn't care. He turned back to Penelope who was glaring at him. Fine, if she wanted to play that game. He didn't care. He once again threw her over his shoulder and left the building.

No fucking way in hell was he going to let other people stare at what was his. Not while she was doing a strip tease. Those would now only be for him and him only.

"Derek! Put me down! What the hell is wrong with you?"

"No," he said as he swatted her ass.

"Did you just spank me?"

"Yes," he said as he did it again.

"Spank me one more time, Morgan, and I will make your life a living hell," she snarled.

"And watching you in there didn't just do that? Come on Penelope everyone practically saw you fucking naked. "

"Yeah! You big lug. That's the point of a strip tease class," she answered.

"For someone who has never done that before, you sure as hell were a fucking pro. I'm pretty sure that asshole came in his pants when you tuned around," Derek said, putting her down and trapping her with his arms on either side as he pushed her up against his car.

"Do you really think so?" she asked eagerly. "I was trying to be as sexy as I could be."

"Are you kidding me right now? You wanted that asshole to jizz in his pants. Have you lost it?"

He saw the hurt flash across her eyes. "Yes, Derek. I wanted to feel sexy. You don't know what it's like to not feel sexy. I put this on my list years ago. I, me, chubby, Penelope Garcia wanted for once feel super sexy. Thanks for taking that feeling and stomping on it!" She tried to move out of his grasp but he wouldn't let her.

"You're joking? You're the sexiest person I know! I have to will my chubby to go down every. Single. Time. You are close to me. Especial now that I know your fucking clit is pierced."

"You don't believe that!" she yelled.

"I don't?" He glared at her. "You think I'm not seconds from snapping at any moment?"

He reached down and pulled the top off of her exposing the outfit, if you could even call it that, once again. "Seeing you like this… Fuck. This should only be for me."

He bent down and crushed his lips to her. Giving her no mercy, he plundered her mouth, finally being able to taste his woman. He couldn't wait any longer. He needed to feel all of her. He moved his hands to the thin straps holding up the outfit and yanked.

She was completely exposed from the waist up. And the only reason why the whole thing didn't fall to the floor was because his body stopped the rest from falling.

"Derek," she moaned.

"That's it, baby girl, say my name," he said, as he moved his lips toward her chest.

He could feel the hard peek against his chin. His mouth watered in anticipation. He was just about to devour her nipple when they heard a throat clearing.

"Excuse me."

Derek groaned as he looked to where the voice had come from. There right next to him was a uniformed police officer.

Fuck!

He tried to shield Penelope the best he could but the damage was already done. The officer's flashlight was shining right on Penelope exposed body. "Ma'am you need to cover up."

Penelope squeaked and dove for her top. Once she was safely under it, Derek moved to the side before handing Penelope her leggings. "Put them on," he said through clenched teeth.

Derek tuned to the officer. "What can I help you with?"

"We were called her about a disturbance. We got word there was a fight, but interesting enough, I also see indecent exposure," the office remarked, with a deadpan expression.

"There's been a misunderstanding, that's all," Derek said. "You're a good-looking fella, I'm sure you get a bunch of the ladies."

The officer raised his eyebrow.

"What the hell are you doing, Derek?" Penelope asked, annoyance in her tone.

"Wait, that came out wrong. My girl here," He cocked his head toward Penelope. "That guy in there was saying some vulgar things to her."

"You mean during the strip tease workshop?"

"Yeah, well," Derek could feel his face heat. "I was defending her. "

"And to defend her, you decided to bring her out to the parking lot and decide to be intimate with her, in public place?"

"Oh god!" Penelope cried.

"It's not what it looks like I promise," Derek tried again. "We work at the BAU for the FBI and-"

"I'm sure. Just like I'm the queen of England," the officer remarked.

"No really," Penelope said. "He's telling the truth. We work for the FBI."

"I've heard it all before. Where are your credentials?" The officer asked.

Penelope looked at Derek. "I left mine at home for the class."

Derek looked down, the bag he had brought with him was missing. "My workout bag, which is still inside has my badge."

"Tell it to the judge," he said. "I'm taking you both in. You," he pointed at Derek. "For inciting violence. And you for indecent exposure. If you really are FBI, like you claim to be, you both should know better than this."

XXXX

Ten minutes later Derek and Penelope were both sitting in the back of the squad car. The officer was able to get Derek's stuff from the building and did indeed see his FBI badge but that didn't stop the officer from bringing them both in. Even with Derek's badge, they didn't have Penelope's. However, the officer was lenient he let them both stay in the back of his car and didn't cuff either of them.

Penelope looked out the window and started historically laughing.

Derek turned to her, his face hard as stone. "Why are you laughing, Garcia? This is a huge deal we can both get fired for this."

She tried to stop laughing. "No I know it is, Derek." She let out another laugh. "It just that, we can now cross off one of your items on your list now, too."

Derek just stared at her.

"You know, do something that Hotch would have to bail us out for."

The corner of Derek's mouth rose. "I meant something work related, not getting arrested."

"Hey but it still works. You get to cross this off your list like I get to cross strip tease."

"You better cross that off. We are not doing this again. Not unless it a private showing." He waggled his eyebrows at her.

"See, we can always find the good in everything," Penelope said as she turned to look out the window again before she started to laugh.

Two hours later Hotch was walking both of them out of the precinct. Penelope walked behind Derek trying to keep from laughing. As the night when on, she laughed more and more. This turned out to be absolutely ridiculous. Something that could truly only happen to them.

When they made it to Hotch's truck he finally spoke. "You two are lucky. I was with Rossi when you called me and he was able to cash in a few favors. No one is ever going to know this ever happened."

"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, " Penelope said form the backseat.

"Don't thank me yet, Garcia. You both are going to be waist deep in paperwork for the next month," Hotch finished.

"We understand," Derek said. "We really appreciate you helping us." Penelope could see Derek's smirk in the mirror. As the time went on, and they knew they were going to be okay, the incident became more funny.

"Don't thank me, " Hotch remarked. "Thank Rossi. He's the one you need to thank for your jobs. And, just a heads up. I'm pretty sure he will never let you live this down."

"Understood," Derek said.

After a few minutes Penelope spoke up from her seat. "Ummm, do umm, you guys…uhh know about the outfit?"

Hotch looked into the review mirror at her. "What do you think Rossi's not gonna let you live down?"