A/N: I have a short epilogue yet to post.

Chapter Nine

Decisions Made

Sarah and Chuck had room service bring their breakfast. She sat reading the USA Today while Chuck was lost in thought. He was quiet, introspective. She knew it on some level but was preoccupied with the paper.

"Sarah." It was the tone of his voice that caught her attention. Drawing the newspaper down, she looked over the top of it at him.

"Marry me." His eyes were searching.

She saw that. "Chuck," That's all she could say. She cleared her throat. I… I don't know-"

"Look Sarah, we have tried in the past but something always got in our way. Let's try again, but this time if we're married we can't just walk away. It will take more effort. I don't want to give up on you. I want losing you to be as hard physically as it is emotionally. If we get married it will be, or at least more so."

"You know I love you," she said.

He shook his head in answer.

"But I don't see how that is going to fix our problems."

"What problems Sarah. Spell it out. The last time we were having this conversation it was you trying to convince me we needed to get back together. Time has shown me that you were right. Please don't tell me you've changed your mind."

"The last 3 months have been hard on me. Hell, our whole time together has been hard on me. First, I was trying to convince myself, and then you, that I didn't care about you, that I didn't love you. Finally, just when it seemed that we had a shot at making it work." She hung her head gently shaking it back and forth. "Then I get that order."

They locked eyes for a moment.

The last three months have been the hardest. I've thought about you everyday. When I should be concentrating on work, I'm thinking about you. My work has suffered. So I'm unhappy because I don't have you and I'm unhappy because I expect more of myself with my job.

She stood and walked away from him. "What scares me the most is if we try to work it out…who's to say it will work? Then I'm in worse shape than I've ever been in. Chuck one day you're the very air I breath and the next day you're poison."

He did not take offense. He knew exactly what she was saying. He had lived it too.

Chuck stood up to join her. With her back to him he put his arms around her clasping them at her stomach, he laid his chin on her shoulder. "Look Sarah, you can't live in fear of this. We're worth the risk. Tell me you will think about it?"

She turned to face him. "I'll think about it. But I have to be honest I don't think I'll agree to marry you…I just don-"

"Don't say any more. Just think about it."

He had not meant for it to but his spontaneous proposal put an edge to the morning. Lizzy, when she joined them felt the tension in the air immediately. How can these two make loving so hard, she thought?

They were in Chuck's room now. Lizzy looked from one to the other. "How was your night? You guy's enjoy yourself?"

They both sort of chuckled.

"See… you guys had a great time. Why the long faces today?" She honestly hoped someone would answer her.

Chuck looked at Sarah to see if she would give it a shot. Seeing she was not about to, he said. "We had a great time, Lizzy. The best. But it's over now and we have got to move on. That's the problem."

Just as she was about to speak, Sarah's phone rang. Sarah looked at it and then said. "I've got to take this." She went into her room and closed the door.

Chuck knew it was her job calling. Intruding once again on his time with her. As he looked at the closed door, it reminded him of how Sarah was closed to him with respect to her job. It could never be a topic of conversation for them. That door began to symbolize her job and we wanted to kick it in, rip it from the wall like he wanted to rip the secretes from their lives. He was about to stand up when he heard Sarah raise her voice from the other room.

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Sarah closed her door and answered her phone. "Sarah Walker, secure."

"Arthur Graham, Secure. How are you Agent Walker?"

I'm fine Sir. We are in Indianapolis. We're pretty sure Casey's here."

"Walker, what I wanted to talk with about is Chuck's friend, Elizabeth Stone. There was some mix up with her background check. We cannot corroborate her being a graduate of Clemson University like she has told Chuck. That calls other apects of her background in question."

"What are you saying, Director?"

"I don't want Chuck talking about company business with her. If he hasn't already, he could leak information to any number of groups we would just as soon not get their hands on the intel Bartowski has access to."

Sarah hesitated, "What are my orders, Director?"

Do not allow Bartowski to discuss company matters with her. Use whatever means to prevent it."

"Yes sir." Sarah's eyes went dead like her insides. "I can't believe this!" she yelled. She took five minutes or more to compose herself. She knew having been given that order that somehow she would have to carry it out. It was inevitable. She wanted to drop to her knees and ball. But she couldn't, she had a job to do. Prevent any unauthorized communication between Chuck and Lizzy. She opened her door and felt like she was walking towards the executioner as she entered Chuck's room. Even though she had no reason to, she knew she would have to act on that order.

She noticed that they both watched her intently. Without appearing to notice she thought it was odd how Lizzy was scrutinizing her. She would have investigated this further but Chuck distracted her.

Sarah, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, just work."

Work…Work, his true nemesis, he thought. He hated her work. The secretes, the lies.

"I don't understand what's going on with you two. Something bad must have happened in the past. I've never seen two people so tore up. I'm going to my room. Call me when your ready to leave." Lizzy said, the exasperation evident in her voice.

Chuck snapped when Sarah refused to speak with him about the call. It's the way it had always been and the way it would always be. He thought about what Jill had told him. He now knew who his rival was. It was never Bryce Larkin. Sarah's real lover, the one he never could compete with. Her job. He wanted to do something, strike out at her job. Confront it as though it were a man. Anything to release his pent up anger.

"Good idea, Lizzy. You don't know anything about Sarah and I." Chuck walked to the door and opened it. "Come on, do I have a story to tell you." They walked out into the hall about half way to Lizzy's room.

"Chuck." Sarah said. It was the sound of her voice that made him turn around. Her expression alone told him that he could not talk with Lizzy about any of this.

"What's the matter Sarah? Don't you trust me?" Seeing her expression made him livid. She was doing her job now.

"I trust you with my life Chuck. But I have orders." She hoped he understood what she was saying and that she would have no choice if pushed to the limit.

Please Chuck. Please come back. Please don't go with Lizzy, she thought.

Chuck knew that she did trust him with her life. He decided that it was time once and for all to see if now, she could be trusted with his.

"Sarah, what do you propose I say to Lizzy? Nothing! You will be on a plane to who knows where in a week or two while Lizzy and I go back to California and work together for the next...who knows how long."

"Do you really THINK I can just ignore this?"

"What I know is you cannot have that conversation." She had her orders, she thought again.

Chuck knew he was pushing Sarah's buttons. But what Sarah didn't know was that he was intentionally bating her.

Lizzy also knew that they were speaking of more than just their romance.

Chuck stared Sarah down and then finally said, "Come on Lizzy."

"Chuck. Don't make me do this." Sarah's arm was behind her back and both Chuck and Lizzy knew she concealed something. Chuck knew exactly what it was.

Chuck took two steps toward Sarah, full of rage. "But Sarah, that is exactly what I am going to make you do."

Lizzy looked from Chuck then to Sarah and she could see a cold, steel in Sarah's eyes. Lizzy was sure the bluff her boss was playing was about to be called. She became really frightened.

Chuck took a deep breath and then continued. "The world of Sarah Walker and the world of Chuck Bartowski can't exist together as much as I wish they could. I've just come to realize that I don't care to live in my world without you."

He took another step towards Sarah with less anger in his movement. "I am forcing you to choose. Right here. Right now. Are you going to stay in your world alone or come to mine?" He stared at her for what seemed like an eternity as he searched her blue eyes.

But then he saw that she realized what he intended to do.

Those same blue eyes began to tear up. "Chuck, don't you dare do this to me. I will do it, I promise you. You know I will."

Chuck no longer cared.

As he turned back towards Lizzy, he heard movement from Sarah and he knew she had drawn her gun.

"Chuck." Her voice was calm. She had stepped out into the hall. He stopped but did not turn around.

"I will do it, but I won't be able to live with it."

He knew what she was telling him. Again, after pulling the trigger she would pull it a second time. And this time Casey wouldn't be here to stop her.

With his back still turned to her he said, "You need to decide which world you're gonna live in. Sarah I've found the path. We'll see in a minute if it's a dead end."He began to walk away.

He heard the distinctive sound of her Beretta cocking but he continued to walk down the aisle. One step, then two, then three. He really didn't expect to see his next step.

Just a split second before she pulled the trigger, she flashed to that moment in his room. The look in his eyes haunted her to this day. Then she remembered the sound of him calling out to her in his dream and how she could hear the betrayal he felt in his voice. She thought of how lifeless she felt as she slumped to the floor after pulling the trigger. Then she thought of Carina. Is Chuck more important that my job? she thought. It was at that moment that she broke.

"Bartowski."

The change in her voice caused Lizzy to turn around to look at Sarah. She quickly grabbed her boss's arm.

Chuck turned to see Sarah falling to her knees just outside his hotel room doorway sobbing uncontrollably. Lizzy began to walk back towards Sarah but Chuck grabbed her arm. "Sarah, I want you. But I will not share you because you know as sure as I'm standing here right now... alive, that my world and your world are not meant to be together. Your job required you to do what you thought you had to do, even if it hurt me." He had tears in his eyes as he watched her.

"That's what I've done, Sarah. What I had to do. But if you come with me, I promise you I will spend every minute of my life making sure you forget about all the pain you've suffered."

Lizzy looked from Chuck to Sarah with tears streaming down her eyes. To see the proud woman sobbing uncontrollably in the hallway was more than she could stand.

"Please Sarah, go with him. I know he loves you. I know him and he will love you until his last breath."

It was something about her simple statement, from a relative stranger, that pierced Sarah's heart. She began to consider the possibility of a different life.

"Chuck, I can't leave...this life." she finally said."

"Why not? Sarah." He waited until she looked at him. "Why Not?" He spread his arms out to the side in frustration.

"It's all I know." She dropped her gaze.

"That's not true, Sarah. You know what life can be like living with me." He began to walk back towards her slowly. "You know about my family and friends and how they will accept you back into their hearts as though you never left. And you know that I would die for just the chance to be with you."

Sarah could not deny that. He had just proven it.

Chuck stood in front of her now as he spoke to her. When he finished he looked at her until she raised her head to look at him again. After holding her gaze for a moment he reached out his hand to her. She looked at his hand and then at his face. With a hint of a smile she took hold of his hand and allowed him to help her up.

As Chuck put his arm around Sarah, Lizzy began to cry with happiness. She noticed as they walked into his room and closed the door that Sarah had left her pistol on the carpet. She hurried back to where Sarah had fallen and picked up the weapon and put it in her purse.

She pulled out a handkerchief from her purse and dried her eyes. As she thought about what she had just witnessed, she pulled out her phone and dialed a number.

"Yes, Agent Stone here. Yes, Director Graham, everything went as planned. I was worried at one point, but in the end, she decided to stay with Chuck. It was a very dangerous game we played here today. Yes sir, I've read her file. Yes sir. I couldn't agree more sir. If someone with Agent Walker's record does not deserve happiness, I don't know who does." Yes sir, I'll see you next week.

Agent Stone put away her phone and went to finish up the loose ends on her first assignment.

Chuck walked Sarah towards his bed but halfway there and mid-stride, her body suddenly stiffened. She looked at him, her gaze so intense it actually frightened him for a moment. She had put the pieces together.

"I have one question to ask you, she said. It's important that you answer it honestly." He had never heard the tone of her voice before.

He could only nod his head.

"Were you a part of it?"

Chuck looked at her trying to understand what she was really asking. "I don't-"

"It's a simple question, Chuck. Were you in on it?"

"Sarah, I don't have a clue what you're talking about."

Sarah searched his eyes and then smiled the first happy smile he had seen on her since their reunion. "That's the right answer."