Once I'd calmed down and accepted my fate, I took a seat in Naru's surprisingly comfortable office chair. Yes, I was about to talk to a psychiatrist who may or may not have me medicated or institutionalized- but I was at least going to be cozy while doing so. The man- Dr. Hughes- closed the door behind me and stationed himself an armchair I'd never seen in Naru's office. Then again, I'd never spent much time in this room. Many times, I caught a glimpse as a teenage boy stormed out or while delivering tea, but I'd never had a chance to take a good look around. The bookshelves didn't interest me: the lack of personal trinkets on Naru's desk was more disturbing. No photos. Not even a calendar. I longed to reach down and peek inside one of the drawers.
Suddenly, thick silence pressed down on me. Lin-san's keyboard could be heard from the other office. The doctor must have been waiting for me to say something, but I kept my eyes averted. What an uncomfortable situation...
I'm actually going to have to go through with this? An agitated sigh escaped me as I lifted my face from the enigma of the desk and gave Dr. Hughes my attention. Notebook at the ready, he seemed eager to diagnose my every flaw.
"Now that Naru is gone, do you have any real questions, Taniyama-san? We're now within the realm of doctor-patient confidentiality, and I've discouraged him from 'forgetting' a microphone in his office, so if there's anything you're concerned about..." Okay, maybe he wasn't so bad. Any real questions? I could ask anything? Hmm.
"How do you know Naru, even?" It did seem strange for my boss to be able to bring in a foreign shrink with very little notice.
"I've worked with his father on a few occasions-" Naru's father? -"and of course, met his son. That was some time ago, but he- Naru, that is, seems very much the same as he was two years ago."
"So... You know what Naru, Lin-san and I do here at SPR? You know that we... hunt... ghosts?" I fidgeted through the entire phrase. There was no way to sugar coat it. Dr. Hughes sat straight up.
"I know what 'Shibuya Psychic Research' does, yes, and I know that my dear friend's son is having difficulties with an assistant-investigator who appears to have trouble sleeping. I've worked with psychics before, they're usually usually trauma or stress patients. I've worked with plain old sleeping disorders before, but never with a psychic. Insomnia is my area of expertise as an ESRS member; I've had more than a few patients with insomnia over the years, but this will be my first chance to work with one who's psychic. That is- assuming you do indeed have a sleeping disorder. That's yet to be determined," He mused. I perked up: maybe he wouldn't think I was crazy!
"I'm not really psychic- more latent."
The doctor opened his notebook to a page somewhere in the middle and skimmed it. "Well, I heard you've had a myriad of pre-cognitive and post-cognitive dreams?" I nodded. "There's a few more erm- talents, your boss has mentioned, but the dreams alone point to a psychic. Out of body experiences, for instance, were mentioned along with cleansing a spirit- a medium's talent- but that's overkill. We're going to focus on sleep. If you don't mind me asking, how long have you been having psychic dreams?"
"Mm... around the time I started working for Naru." It didn't escape my notice that he jotted a few words down on that middle page. My anxiety returned full force after being calmed somewhat by Dr. Hughes' complete understanding of SPR. How much does this man need to know to help me? Obviously, I didn't want to let it slip that my problem is somehow related to dreams I have that include Naru, and how the more considerate aspect of his personality is gradually being shut out of my dream plane-psychic plane, whatever. I made yet another mental note to casually ask Naru, or maybe Lin-san, about that whole thing.
"Do you have these types of dreams often?" I tore my eyes from the older man's scrawling hand to look at his face. Pale skin gave way to soft wrinkles: he's seen a lot in his life, and every detail remained etched on his face.
"Well, hm. Yes and no. Usually, I have them when I'm working. I've been working a lot lately, so before my sleeping habits got all warped, I was having psychic dreams nearly every case. It started off really slow, though, and at first they were really more just Na-nevermind. My boss likes to give me a hard time about always sleeping on the job, but Bou-san and the others think it's the best way I can help out on a case. I have a log of psychic dreams I've had over our cases- well, actually Lin-san has it in SPR's database. You know- where we keep copies of our reports, things that happen while working, and so on..." I was rambling. Across from me, green eyes lit up.
"Oh, excellent! So, every psychic dream is in this log? I'll have to take a peek if Lin permits. Yes, just wonderful. Well, continuing," he sniffed. "I understand that it's been around two and a half months since this all began?" WHAT? That many weeks ago was what- July? By the beguiled look on my face, he knew I was completely lost. "Yes, it's not uncommon for someone to lose track of time when something like this happens. On average, how many hours a night do you sleep?"
"...It started with trouble falling asleep; I'd get five or six hours a night. These days, one or two nights a week I don't sleep at all, and the rest are usually in the 4-5 hour range." Green eyes darkened; the doctor frowned and leaned back into his cozy armchair.
"Chronic insomnia. Do you have any health conditions? Substance abuse problems? Depression? Stress?" I shook my head as he prattled on, but thought a little before shaking at 'stress.' Everyone goes through stress: just because I'm a teenager living alone, depending on this job to support myself doesn't mean I'm pulling my hair out. I've always handled stress pretty well, I think.
"...Is something really wrong with me?" I had to ask. Squeamish, I looked down to my shoes.
"Do you believe something is really wrong?" I glanced back up in a flash, irritated.
"Well, you're the doctor, aren't you? You're supposed to know these things! I don't see why we would be wasting our time like this-" I stood and looked out Naru's window; Anger blossomed inside me. Anger at this man, my stupid boss who brought him here, and whatever was wrong with my head that brought them to conspire against me. How I wished to be one of the leaves in that day's high wind.
"You're the medium aren't you? The more I think about it, the more I doubt this is medical. Stress could be a factor, yes, but if it's work-related then it would be more psychic than medical. Think for a moment, close your eyes and see if you get a feeling. Try and read yourself."
I scoffed, but cooled my temper. Plopping back down in Naru's chair, I gave it a shot. With my eyes closed and my breathing slowed, I tried to tune my senses to nothing beyond my own body. It seemed to come to me naturally: just like falling asleep should, only I was awake. Soon, the distant keyboard noises disappeared and silence prevailed over my personal darkness. As I inhaled, a sharp pang emerged in the pit of my stomach and surged up through my abdomen. I tried to decipher it: a burning sensation, like touching a hot kettle, yet a sickening one, like thinking there's one more stair as you descend. It was definitely not anything I'd felt in real life. A hollow, distant pain that felt completely false, yet throbbed all the way to my fingertips. My lungs ached the most in this fire, and I gasped slightly as I exhaled.
Pain is your body's way of telling you something is wrong- this pain- this doesn't exist. It is my intuition.
"Well?" My eyes shot open.
"You're right. It's not medical. My intuition says it's not." I marveled at my accomplishment: it wasn't easy for me to focus on things, but I had just shut out the world to listen to my intuition clearly. "I should do that more often." Dr. Hughes smiled and sat up, seemingly refreshed.
"Alright- think back. Do you remember anything that may have triggered your insomnia?"
"No- not really." I didn't want to divulge anything about "the red necklace" file or my dream guide's theories, so I gave a partial truth. "I'm not really sure what started this, or when it started, I just remember I had a nightmare."
"A nightmare-? What happened in this-" That writing hand moved furiously across paper again, I swear I heard it tear the sheet.
"That's the problem- I don't remember. Typically, I remember my dreams, but on this one I draw a blank. Every time I think about it, I-I can't."
"Hmm. Repressed dream? Interesting. Well, our time for today is nearly up. I'm thinking that if you use whatever technique you just employed to listen to your intuition -but while concentrating on that repressed dream- you might be able to uncover it. If you want to, that is." He smiled and shut his notebook. "I think we've had a good first session, don't you? We know this isn't medical, but that doesn't mean that if it gets worse from this point you won't have to have actual medical treatment for it."
"What do you mean- what kind of treatment- if it gets worse?" Though I didn't want to consider being medicated for this, I had to at least know what kind of drugs he was talking about.
"Well, sleeping pills. A short term prescription, of course- there are many risks associated with sleeping pills. But, if after a few sessions we can't unravel this, we may have to give them a try. One thing's certain, you and I are going to be seeing each other at least once a week for a while, until this situation improves," The foreign man stood and stretched his arms, "Well, do you have any further questions?" Actually, there was something I was curious about...
"Dr. Hughes, where are you from? You're part of the ES, ERS something?" My finger roamed to my bottom lip: a classic Taniyama Mai thinking pose, yet the acronym I searched for didn't come to me.
"I'm half French, half English, but I'm from London. I think you mean ESRS, that is- European Sleep Research Society. I'm probably the only member that associates with paranormal investigators."
"Ah~" I smiled, "So, then, would you prefer being Hughes-san, Dr. Hughes, Doc, Mr. Hughes, what?" He immediately brightened, as if the question itself made his day, no, his week.
"Funny you should ask! Doc's fine- or Hughes-san, if you'd prefer to use a more traditional style. And you? Would you want to stick with Taniyama-san, or perhaps Mai-chan? There's Miss Taniyama, Mademoiselle Taniyama, and probably a few other titles I could come up with, surname or first."
"Hmm- Well, I'd like to take you up on that last exotic-sounding one,"
"Mademoiselle?"
"Yeah! That!" I beamed at him: he was good company for a shrink. "Or else Mai-chan will do just fine." With that, we shook hands (how strange- not bowing!) and he went on his way, leaving me alone in Naru's office. Temptation nibbled my earlobes; tingled in my toes: I had to explore while I had the chance. The top drawer of Naru's desk was locked, disappointed, I tried the next one down.
Success! Inside were several books, all in English, a mirror, of course, and a few post-it's with what I assumed to be Naru's handwriting displayed all over them. Notes on something- and a lot of them. Some were looking pretty weathered: the sticky stuff had been completely rubbed off the back of a few. At that moment, I wished I could understand more than basic English. I read a few words -"the" -"an" -"lake" -"she" -"he" and the like, but found not one sentence I could understand completely.
Why doesn't Naru seem to use kanji at all? Who knew what tidbits of information about Naru and Lin-san were on those post-its. If only I'd had the language skills to interpret them... Maybe that's why Naru has been taking so damn many cases: If he keeps me out of school, I won't be smart enough to snoop properly. I'll be smart enough to make tea, nothing more.
Irritated at myself, I pushed the notes off the the side and lifted the book beneath them. Under it was a pile of maps. Hmm.
Suddenly, footsteps sounded closer and closer to the the door. I shoved everything in order as best as I could, closed the offending drawer (how dare it tempt me like that) and threw my feet up on Naru's desk. Trying to keep casual, of course.
When he appeared in the doorway, I assumed he would scold me for having my feet on his precious desk, or lingering once Doc had left, but no. For a moment, he just stood there in the door frame, looking at me. Assessing me, more like. It was more than a little uncomfortable, and heatwaves rose to my face against my will. I looked down to make sure my skirt wasn't hiked weird since my feet were up, or that I'd left something from the drawer on his desk, but no. Everything seemed in perfect order. Yet, I looked back up and into that searching gaze again. An uncomfortable urge to speak washed over me and I acted on it.
"Ne- You have a really comfy chair. I see why you never leave this room..." The glare I received was one that, logically, should have been followed by a thorough rant, Naru-style, but he merely turned and walked back towards the lounge.
"Let's go, Mai. You have a visitor."
To answer a couple questions: the two planes, dream and psychic, aren't a theory I researched or anything... Or at least I don't think they're a real theory. That would be pretty cool if they were, but in my story they are someone's theory, which will be made clear when Mai finally mans up enough to ask Naru ("a researcher") like she was told to do.
I hope I'm doing the Doc right- I've never seen anyone for insomnia, so I don't know how to go about it. But Mai is quite different from a regular patient in that she's psychic, so maybe it's not too off.
This has probably been the longest break I've taken since I started IOTWCS! Geez!
Well, as for YOU, yeah YOU reading this- I'm much obliged. (: And compelled to tell you I didn't edit it very closely, sorry!
And please, take the time to review! If you see something wrong, lemme know. I've had some seriously lovely reviews so far, and they've been inspiring. Merci beaucoup, many thanks.
x. thief
