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Chapter 9
"What did you promise me Sam?" Andy was tiring of the back and forth motions they kept doing, this had to come to an end before it killed one of them, coz it was killing her inside a little more each day.
"To love you, to keep loving you, to be here to be in love with you. When I wrote that on your arm, I gave you the promise of that, and no matter what happens, nothing will ever change it. I was stupid enough to think that I could change it if you weren't around much, but I failed miserably and broke your heart instead and I'm sorry for being a jackass of epic proportions. But I love you, I really do, and that's just not gonna go away". Sam let his secrets slip loose of his lips because she deserved to know.
He had on a few occasions used the word love, but they were few and far between, and they were never said with the intensity of meaning behind them that he felt now.
Sam watched Andy's face fall at his words, he clearly struck a nerve somewhere, with something he said, but he didn't have the faintest idea what.
He watched as Andy let her hand drift up to clamp it over her eyes before she just flopped back on the bed.
Had she really been that dense to miss every important thing Sam had said or done that told her why he was doing all of this the whole time?
Andy removed her hand from her eyes as she felt the mattress dip next to her, to see Sam mirror her position across the bed, only he was looking at her, like as in really looking at her, almost looking through her.
"Sam I don't know where to go from here, I dunno what you want, from the world, life, me..."
"There's only one thing I want McNally". Sam rolled on to his side to face her, as he propped himself up on one arm, hovering just above her.
"What?"
"To be with you". Sam found his face drifting incredibly close to hers of its own accord, pulled in by an unseen force. He was resisting the urge to lean in and just kiss her, the memory of what happened the last time he tried that was still too fresh in his mind. He saw the edges of Andy's lips tug up in a small smile, a red hue slipping its way up her neck and before reaching her cheeks.
Sam closed his eyes and inhaled Andy's scent before letting his arm slip from under his head, allowing him to lay back down flat on his back. This had to be her choice, her decision, he wouldn't try influence her decision by weakening her senses, infusing it into a lust filled state the minute things got heated and carried away, which was so easy when he simply just touched her.
"Sam?"
"Yeah?" Sam felt Andy take hold of one of his hands, intertwining their fingers as she held on to it tightly.
"Can we stay here, like this for a while?"
Sam nodded, keeping his eyes closed, as he gently squeezed her hand.
"Sam?"
"Mmmm"
"Saaaaam, are you kidding me?"
Andy was whining, almost as though she thought he had fallen asleep.
Sam was so content to just lay there with her, holding her hand, no harsh words being exchanged.
He had missed this more than he would ever admit to another soul.
He felt Andy shuffle around next to him and opened one eye to see what she was doing, when he felt the tickle of hair brush across his face, to find her inches away from his face, before she crashed her lips into his, rendering him utterly stunned and speechless before his mind jumped to rational thinking.
Pushing her away by gently putting a hand to her shoulder, Sam broke the kiss as Andy let her head drop to Sam's chest as she mumbled a 'sorry' slightly breathlessly.
"Andy, believe me when I say, that there is nothing more I want than to kiss you right now, but you need to figure out what you wanna do, before this goes any further. I'm not gonna cloud your decisions by dragging you into my bed and you regret it in the morning".
Andy's head lifted to peer at Sam from under a head of dishevelled hair.
"This, I want this, you, us. It was always you, and I know that we have a long way to go before we get to where we were, but you promised to fight for it if things got tough, and that's what you're doing, so we're gonna do it together, I'm gonna fight with you to keep it and make it better...".
Andy's words failed as she felt Sam pull her back down to meet his lips, pouring every emotion he wanted to convey into that one single moment.
"Will you stay here, just like this, for tonight?" Sam breathed out after Andy's head found a resting place on his chest, his arms wrapped around her, savouring the moment.
"Sam..."
"Just like this..."
"Wouldn't wanna be anywhere else".
Sam felt the relief sweep through him as she whispered her answer.
"Andy, one more thing?"
"Um...yeah, I'm still awake". Andy had been lying without moving and Sam knew it wouldn't be long before she drifted off to sleep.
"I love you, and one day I'm gonna marry you".
Sam felt her breath catch as his words stole it away.
"Really? Sam..."
"Really. One day".
"I love you too Sam". Andy whispered as her yawn took over.
Sam smiled, at least this time she hadn't said no.
Another thought crossed his mind as he draped his arm tightly over her. In the beginning when Oliver pushed him into talking to her, he had made the assumption that she was pregnant, only to find out she wasn't, he realized then in that moment that he was hoping she would say she was, and he was more than a little disappointed when she said she wasn't. Oliver had been right though, letting her go at all, even if the spot at the drug squad wasn't on the table, and he would be making the biggest mistake of his life.
He had only assumed that she was pregnant because when faced with an opportunity like that he couldn't help but let his mind dream up what he so wishfully desired for.
A child with Andy, now that thought made him smile.
"Andy?"
"Mmm?"
"If there is one thing you could ever do for Traci, what would you do?"
"Give her Jerry's car". Andy mumbled her voice encased in sleep.
"Jerry's car?"
"Yeah, she wanted his car but couldn't afford it, I'd already bought mine, so couldn't help her. She really wanted the car just because he loved it so much".
When the sun filtered into Sam's bedroom, Andy woke up, first thinking she was still dreaming as she looked around the room, before she saw Sam watching her.
"What?" Andy giggled out as she looked at him before pulling the covers over her face.
"Just thinking how I could get used to this McNally".
His words elicited another fit of embarrassed giggles from her.
"We have to get going, we need to be somewhere before shift".
"Where?"
"Just get up McNally". Sam whined before getting out of bed.
Two hours later Andy pulled up outside Traci's house, revving the engine before hitting the hooter, hoping it was enough to draw Traci's attention. She looked up to see Sam pull into the driveway behind her in his truck.
Seconds later the front door flew open and Andy saw Traci stop in her tracks as she paled at what her eyes were seeing.
Andy turned off the engine and climbed out, making her way over to Traci, holding out the set of keys.
"Andy...?" Traci's voice choked as her sobs became too much to hold in, before Andy swept Traci into a tight hug.
"A little thank you from Sam". Andy whispered into her ear.
"No, I can't..."
"Yes you can, I figure you said something to him sometime, and it sorta, kinda fixed him, so thank you! I know you wanted this car, and I know why, so it's Sam's gift to you". Andy didn't need to say more, Traci nodded against her shoulder as she let the tears fall.
Sam watched in awe as Traci became emotional over such a simple object. To him it was just a car, but it was clearly evident that to her it was much more than a red hunk of metal with an engine and wheels.
The thought of Jerry approving brought a smile to his lips, he just knew that his friend would have been more than happy with his idea of getting his car and giving it to Traci.
Sam watched as Andy and Traci stood in a lingering embrace, Andy wiping away a few times at her eyes, clearly wiping away tears as her emotions ran away again, only this time he knew that they were tears of happiness, he for once in recent times causing her to cry for something happy rather than causing the tears of sorrow to plunder her usually smiling face.
After Andy and Traci said their goodbyes, Traci turned to mouth Sam a 'thank you' as Andy climbed into the truck before he pulled out the driveway, heading for the station.
Pulling into the parking lot, Sam saw the worry lines crease across Andy's face, as she was obviously overthinking how she was going to explain them arriving at work together when everyone clearly knew that he had been such an ass and walked away.
Switching off the ignition, Sam leaned over and took one of her hands in his, her eyed flying up to meet his as her teeth tugged on her lip.
"It's the same as any other day, except we're like really late, but Frank let us have the time when I asked for it, so don't overthink it". Sam said as he squeezed her hand before letting it go.
"You know they're all gonna ask, and I kinda don't know what to say". Andy said as Sam walked next to her towards the door, eyes already watching them from inside.
"So don't say anything". Sam said pulling the door open for her to walk into the building.
"You know that's not gonna work". Andy said as she kept her eyes on the floor, walking directly into the locker room as she reached it.
Fifteen minutes later, Andy emerged from the locker room, dressed in her uniform. Stevens pointed towards the door at seeing Andy look around for Sam, before she thanked him and made her way in search of her obvious partner for the day, considering that they were both late Best probably paired them together.
She found Sam leaning against the cruiser, coffees in hand waiting for her.
"I know what I'm gonna say". Andy said reaching her hand out for a coffee.
"To what?" Sam's eyebrows creased in confusion at her sudden statement.
"When they ask...um...about this". Andy waived a hand between them.
"And what's that?"
"That you changed your mind". Andy couldn't help but smile a satisfied grin as her eyes twinkled in mischief at her own statement.
"About?".
"Your rules".
"McNally...?"
"Your TO rules, your speech, you said your car, your rules, you're not here to be my boyfriend and hold my hand, so I'm just gonna tell them that you changed your mind".
Sam couldn't help the dimpled grin that took over his face at her statement. She was letting him know that she was gonna give him a chance to work on them, to fix things. Even though she had told him she was willing to fight with him on it, it was her way of reassuring him, now in uniform that things were gonna be okay.
That they were gonna be okay.
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