Okay, let me start by apologizing eternally. I moved to Bahrain recently, and it's pretty much taken up all of my free time. School is really hard, but it's no excuse. I'll try really, really hard to update more frequently now that things are kind of settling in. So, without further hesitation, chapter nine is here!
I stared up at the while ceiling, seeing nothing. Kevin was asleep on his back next to me snoring softly, even though it sounded like it was echoing off of the Grand Canyon. I could hear the ticking from the clock on his nightstand, but I couldn't bother to drag my eyes off of the mass of white and onto the small hands of a clock. From the dim light slipping through corners of the blinds, I knew that it was just breaking dawn. I had been here since midnight.
As quiet as possible, I rose from the bed and started to slip my clothes on. I noticed some bruises trailing up and down my arms and legs from where his hands had grabbed me. My hair was a matted mess, standing up on the right side and poking out in every direction like a haystack. I looked horrible.
Without even pausing, I left the room, not even caring if any other family member was in the house. On the way out of the hallway I passed Joe's room, or old room, and paused. Should I go in there? Should I stay away? Before I could stop myself and listen to my head, I found my feet pushing me forwards until I was standing in the middle of his room.
Drawers were still opened and turned over, leaving the entire contents of them littering the floor. Mountains of t-shirts and jeans were piled around the room in his haste to flee his house. Unconsciously, I felt a pain of guilt in my heart. It was my fault that he had left.
Walking quietly over to his desk, I trailed my fingertips on the wooden furniture before taking a seat in his comfortable chair. In his quick departure, he had forgotten his laptop. I knew that I shouldn't pry, but it wasn't like he was even coming back, right?
Opening the lid, I was asked immediately for a password to access the desktop. I clicking the hint button, and almost felt the need to laugh when I saw the sentence he had put to remind himself. "J-O-E" the screen displayed, again asking for the password. Still smiling, I typed in Joe and pressed enter, waiting for the desktop to load.
Once everything was running smoothly, I opened a word document, not even thinking about what I was doing. Before I knew it, the worlds were literally flowing from my mind to the keyboard, making my fingers speed to catch up with the quickness of my thoughts. After I had completed what I felt needed to be said, my eyes rose from the frame of the monitor and out past the window, which faced directly into mine. I could see everything in there, my bed, my photo frames, my dresser. All of the thoughts and memories of the innocent childhood we shared came plowing back into my chest, making it hard to breath.
Suddenly feeling sick, I shut the top of the laptop and ran out of the house, heaving to get oxygen into my body. The reality of my last night had just returned to me; the kisses, the touches, the sex. Was it even rape? Sure, it wasn't consensual, but I could never even think that Kevin would do that. He was too
much of a friend, too much of a neighbor. Shaking my head to try to block out my thoughts, I entered my house through the back door, sneaking up the stairs and into my bedroom. Without even thinking about it, I immediately crossed the room and shut the blinds, pulling the drapes over the windows, too.
Curling up on my loveseat, my mind started to wander. What did happen last night? I felt violated- used. The vivid memories were burned into my brain, Kevin's leering smile, his fingertips tracing down my stomach. Running to the bathroom, I threw myself over the toilet bowl and threw up.
After I was sure that I wasn't going to be sick again, I stood up and brushed my teeth. The tears from the reflex were beginning to stream down my face, and I noticed the dark bruises covering my wrists in the mirror. I had hickeys on my throat and chest, the result of Kevin's sick way of marking his territory. I lost my grip on my toothbrush and heard it clatter onto the tile, but I was in front of the toilet again, willing to let anything inside of me come up again.
Unsurprisingly, I was empty.
I'm so sorry, I know that it was short, but I think that it was the best way to leave this off. Remember, reviews get my butt moving on writing. Thank you
