Chapter 8: The Fading of Lines Drawn in the Sand
"There are causes worth dying for, but none worth killing for."
-Albert Camus (1913-1960)
Genevieve was awed by the size of Gringott's. She'd had no idea how far down the depths of the establishment went. The cart sped forward with a speed she hadn't thought possible as they plunged further and further down into the depths of the earth. Until they came to the bottom. The very bottom. There was but one vault door imbedded in solid rock. The goblin stood by and placed the key in the lock and turned. The door lit up glowing an eerie green that flashed brilliantly before dying and then the door slowly opened outward.
The goblin looked up at her. "I cannot follow you in. Only those within the Pendragon bloodline may enter this vault."
"Is it safe," she asked. It looked awfully dark. The goblin nodded. "For you, it is."
He handed her the vault key and stepped away as she crossed the doorway. The vault door swung shut behind her and she was plunged into darkness. Then, several braziers blazed to life, lighting a pathway, flanked on either side by water that glowed. It was clear, pristine, and tranquil. The surface seemed to hum with tension. The pathway was long and far off she could make out a large island in the center of the lake of glowing water. She ventured slowly down the pathway looking upward. She couldn't see the ceiling. It was shrouded in a thick mist and it vaguely resembled an overcast spring day. There was light emanating from above. It made her feel as though she had fallen down a hole into the earth's core.
The closer she came to the island, the larger it seemed. Until she reached it. There was a great wall surrounding the perimeter made of marble with a great doorway. The moment she crossed its threshold, there was a deafening roar that echoed through out the cave. She watched in horror a a large dragon descended from the mists above, coming to land before her. She didn't dare move as the dragon watched her, bending its head down to look at her. It took her several minutes to realize it was staring at her expectantly.
"I'm Genevieve Mac-Black. Genevieve Black. My mother was Persephone Pendragon and-"
The dragon turned away from her, stepping sideways as it went and she finally noticed the tower before her. How had she missed it before? It was so tall it nearly disappeared into the mists above. She stepped toward the tower.
"The treasure is below. The dead are above." She jumped and whirled around. The dragon had already taken flight, but she was sure it hadn't been the dragon who had spoken. She watched as it disappeared into the mist and then headed into the tower. The wall sconces that lined the stairway up into the spire lit up on their own as did the ones that led down below. She descended quietly. It felt as though she had been walking forever until she came to a small doorway. She stepped through and the room lit up in the same way the stairway had. There were mounds of gold as far as her eyes could see. There seemed to be no end to the room. She stared about the room in stunned silence. There was jewelry with every sort of precious jewel encrusted on it. She'd never dreamt of such a place existing anywhere but in fairy tales.
Slowly, she loaded up the handbag she'd brought with her; only taking what she was sure she would need. As she closed her handbag, she happened to look up and noticed a small door. She stood and made her way around the piles of gold and opened the door. A fireplace blazed to life and she was amazed to find the walls lined with shelves full of scrolls.
She backed out of the room, slowly and the fireplace died out immediately; she would come back later to inspect that room. She hurried up the stairs and out of the tower. She was sure she had been gone longer than necessary and she jogged onto the pathway, turning back to look at the large island she'd left behind. Strangely, the tower wasn't visible from the short ways away she'd traveled. The brunette, picked up her pace and all but ran to the vault door, which had swung open just before she reached it. It slammed shut behind her and she followed the goblin back into the cart.
Genevieve hurried out of Gringott's to Fortescue's and Professor Lupin met her with a smile. "I didn't expect you to be so quick."
She gave him a small smile. "Professor-"
"Remus, please."
"Remus, do you think Sirius would mind much if we traveled into muggle London to buy muggle clothes? I don't really think it would be a good idea to be wandering around in dress robes. The idea alone makes me uncomfortable."
He grinned. "I don't think Sirius would mind at all, but I think Hermione would be a much better shopping partner, don't you?"
She gave a small laugh and nodded and the two set about Diagon Alley. Genevieve bought an owl, several rolls of parchment, three new quill sets and even a few bits of furniture she had managed to spot.
"Maybe I should have waited to buy the furniture until after I found a flat to live in," she wondered aloud. Remus gave her a reassuring smile. "No, that's alright. Molly Weasley, Ron's mother went and found you a small flat not far off from here so that should you need anything, you're within walking distance. I took the liberty of having your furniture delivered there."
"Well, that's a relief," she breathed out, feeling herself relax a bit as she spoke.
The flat Molly had picked out was small, but it had everything she needed. She spent the rest of the day moving around what little furniture she had purchased (a very comfortable couch being among them) and then collapsed, exhausted. But she didn't have time to rest. She had promised Draco she would write him and write him she would.
She pulled out a new piece of parchment and a quill.
Dear Draco,
My parents are dead. I don't know why. I don't know what to do now. It still doesn't feel real. I finally visited my vault. And I've gotten myself a flat, but everything just feels wrong. I always thought it would be nice to live on my own and do what I want, but now, I feel like that's not true anymore. I miss eating breakfast with them. I miss watching the telly with them and going grocery shopping on Sundays. I miss taking walks through my neighborhood.
It feels wrong to be here by myself. Everything just feels off. I don't like this. I hate this. I can't cry and I hate this. Is something wrong with me that I'm not crying? I haven't cried all day. There were a few moments where I had forgotten. Shouldn't I be crying? I feel like I should be crying.
I miss you.
Genevieve
She tied the letter to the leg of her owl and sent him off out her window and then she lay down on the couch and stared at a random point on the wall for what seemed like hours. She didn't hear from Draco that night nor the next. Hermione Granger and Ginny Weasley stopped by and took her shopping, then spent the rest of the day helping her fix up and decorate her apartment. It looked livable now.
Genevieve heard from the muggle police before she heard from Draco. Remus had taken care of that. She had been to boarding school with Hermione, who was her best mate, they said. The funeral was small. It was raining. Genevieve still hadn't cried. She'd merely gone back to her apartment and curled up on the couch and then spent the rest of the day listening to the Cure. It was entirely possibly she was being overly emotional, but Genevieve didn't know how to stop herself.
It seemed wrong to her that she was more upset about Draco ignoring her than the deaths of her parents. Being upset over getting dumped by your boyffriend instead of being devastated by your parents's deaths seemed very dramatic.
"He wasn't even my boyfriend," she muttered bitterly to herself as an owl tapped on her window. She stumbled from her couch, sniffling. She felt a cold coming on. The Christmas holiday was just getting worse and worse. She took the package from the owl and ruffled his feathers as she untied the twine keeping her package wrapped. It was a long-eared owl she had named "Byron". He was very taciturn, which suited her just fine. He settled on his perch next to the window and began to preen while she pulled the brown paper away from the package.
It was a large green blanket. Sirius had sent it. The note that accompanied it mentioned that it had belonged to her grandmother and that she would get far more enjoyment out of it than he would. The blanket was made of silk and lined with black fur-mink probably. Byron seemed fascinated by the lining. She wrapped the blanket around herself and settled on the couch.
She turned on the television, watching it unseeingly. Maybe it was time for her to go to bed. Either way, she didn't care. She glanced toward the trunk near her door. She wasn't going to unpack. She wanted to be able to leave as quickly as possible once term started. Genevieve flopped down on the couch and stared at the television again.
For the next week, she spent her time shuffling around the flat aimlessly. She would feed Byron, make breakfast, work on her homework, and clean. Sometimes, she would read. The days were passing by in a painfully slow manner. It was torture. She had finished nearly all her schoolwork and was in the middle of taking a shower when she heard someone moving around in the hallway. She scrubbed the soap from her face and hair and turned off the shower. She wrapped a fluffy green towel around herself and stepped out of the shower. She padded into her bedroom and pulled on some clothes haphazardly and then stumbled into the kitchen.
Hermione Granger was standing at the kitchen sink, pouring herself a glass of water from the tap while Ginny Weasley sat at the small kitchen table reading the muggle newspaper. Her brow furrowed as they continued to ignore her. She must have been dreaming. She sat down at the table across from Ginny. "What are you guys doing here?"
"Grimmauld Place is utterly depressing," Ginny replied dramatically, not bothering to look away from the newspaper, "we had to get out of there."
"Not to mention Ron and Harry are being absolute gits."
"Yes, Harry's gotten it into his thick head that he has some right to know about your relationship with Sirius," Ginny snorted as she turned a page, "he's convinced you're some sort of threat to us all."
Hermione shook her head and rolled her eyes heavenward. "He just can't ever let anything go. It's so annoying sometimes."
"Even Sirius is set to throw him out soon," Ginny marveled, "and as far as Sirius is concerned, Harry can do no wrong, so this is quite peculiar. Sirius has been avoiding him for the past three days by cleaning out every room in the place. We weren't quite sure where he'd been sending things...until we got here."
He'd sent over five lamps, a chest of drawers, several books on the history of magic that were as boring as their titles suggested, several tea services, too many ornate knickknacks to count, and a bunch of frilly, overstuffed decorative pillows. The lamps had had black shades on them. They'd gone nicely with her living room set. The pillows had ended up on her bed. The blanket he had sent her the first night she was there was currently being used as a bedspread. Not much in her flat was to her taste. She preferred it that way, much to her own surprise. She didn't want it to feel like a home. If it felt like home, she was sure that she would come out of whatever fog she was in and sob uncontrollably for the rest of her life and that would simply be unacceptable.
"You may not have much stuff here," Hermione said, bringing Genevieve out of her thoughts, "but it's definitely a lot...brighter in this place. Being at Grimmauld place is like being in a mausoleum. All those paintings of dead people."
"I think it has to do more with who the paintings are of," Ginny pointed out. Hermione nodded in agreement. "I can't imagine growing up there."
"How did you get in?"
"Believe it or not, Sirius had Kreacher bring us," Hermione said. She leaned up against the counter. "Sirius thought you could use the company. You are coming for Christmas, right?"
Genevieve shrugged, looking down at her hands that were folded in her lap. "I'm not exactly feeling too in the spirit of the season this year. With everything that's happened..."
"You can't just stay here by yourself," Ginny exclaimed, breaking the awkward silence that had threatened to fall upon the three. "And I know Mum certainly wouldn't have it. Neither would Sirius. Besides, it's not healthy."
"I already finished all my schoolwork," Genevieve admitted. "I don't know what else to do. I can't even bring myself to step foot outside to go gift shopping. I don't really have many people to shop for, anyway."
Ginny slapped her hands on the tabletop and stood. "Well, that settles it then. We're going into muggle London and we're going to shop."
Genevieve deflated. She just didn't want to do anything. She told Ginny as much and the redhead rolled her eyes. "Yeah, you don't have a choice."
Genevieve scowled up at her and stood as well. "But-"
"No."
She pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes. Ginny was unfazed. "I guess I'll go change."
Two hours later and Genevieve had barely made a dent in her shopping list. What did one get Sirius Black for Christmas?
"What about this? I think I hear Remus saying something about the Rolling Stones once," Hermione suggested, holding up a vinyl album. "And he'd probably love the idea of playing a muggle record in his Mum's house."
Ginny smirked. "Probably. Of course, my Mum will hate it."
"Then he absolutely would love it!"
The corners of Genevieve's mouth lifted into a small smile. Her spirits were slowly lifting but she was still having trouble getting into the spirit of the season and that didn't seem likely to change. Hermione wasn't pushing her nearly as hard as Ginny. Genevieve suspected Hermione knew that her foul mood wasn't just because of her parents' death. She hadn't been as nosy as Ginny was.
"Anyway, back to what I was saying, so, there's no one in Hogwarts you find particularly attractive?"
"I have better things to do with my time than pay attention to boys," Genevieve mumbled, careful to keep from looking at Hermione, who she could feel was staring at her out the corner of her eye. "I have N.E.W.T.s this year, remember?"
"Right. You've never gotten less than an 'O' on a test I suppose," Ginny sighed as she picked through a stack of vinyls, shaking her head, "Why mess with tradition."
"The grades we get in Hogwarts are what are going to help us get a job, Ginny." This sounded like the beginning of a semi-heated argument. Genevieve didn't relish the idea of being stuck in the middle of it, but she didn't really have anywhere to run off to. "Can't we try a different shop. Just pay for what we have and go?"
The two girls turned to look at her. Genevieve shrugged. "I'd kind of like to go to Diagon Alley or something."
"What you really mean is you want to go home and wallow," Ginny supplied bluntly. Hermione rolled her eyes. "Maybe she hasn't had enough time to wallow."
"Well, what's the right amount of time to wallow then," Ginny asked with her hands on her hips. "If we leave her alone, you know she'll wallow for the rest of her life."
"That's a bit of a dramatic statement," Genevieve muttered under her breath. Neither girl heard her. They were too busy arguing in front of the cashier, who looked confused. She gave the cashier an apologetic look as she handed over her purchases. Hermione and Ginny continued to squabble behind her.
"Look, the right snog from the right boy could help her get over this is all I'm saying." Genevieve almost choked on her tongue.
"Are you honestly talking about what I think you're talking about?!" Hermione had the good grace to look apologetic. She crossed her harms uncomfortably as Genevieve glared at Ginny, who wasn't in the least bit sorry. "Well, you could. Everyone needs a good snog now and then."
"I don't think snogging is going to fix my problems," Genevieve snapped as she handed over her money to the now intrigued cashier; her gaze was yo-yoing between the two girls with interest.
"I didn't say it would fix them. But it would make you feel better."
"So, I'm supposed to just go snog someone? Anyone? Just act like a slag?"
"Snogging a single random boy isn't slaggish behavior. And if you picked the right one, nobody would have to know."
"I think this is completely stupid," Hermione grumbled and Genevieve couldn't help but agree. "Snogging is not the answer."
"Then what is," Ginny demanded, "because what you're doing is just pathetic."
"Well, it's what feels right, so I'm going to keep doing it," Genevieve replied coolly as she took her change from the cashier and grabbed her shopping bag, "I'll snog someone when I finally feel like it."
It annoyed Genevieve that the conversation continued even after they were in Diagon Alley. Genevieve practically stomped into Frotescue's. Ginny was hot on her heels. "If you've snogged a boy before, I'd don't see what the big deal is."
"Ginny," Hermione hissed, pulling on the girls sleeve as surreptitiously as she could. The booths inside the shop were surprisingly full and Ginny wasn't exactly being quiet. "Maybe we would continue this later."
Genevieve gave her a withering look. "You're willing to let her practically harass me later on? You're okay with this?!"
"I didn't say that-"
"Why is my love life so interesting to the two of you all the sudden?!"
"Because you don't have one!"
"Neither does Hermione." Hermione took in a breath sharply, but Genevieve and Ginny ignored. Ginny laughed. "So, she's been a bit busy with more than just her O.W.L.s. Do you really think she never snogged Krum last year? Don't be thick."
"Honestly, you two-"
"Shut up, Granger-"
"Why don't you shut up, Ginny," Genevieve shot back, cutting her off, "and sod off, too, while you're at it."
"I'm not going to drop this!"
Genevieve resolutely turned her back to the girl. "I swear, Weasley, if you don't shut your mouth, I'm going to hex you into oblivion."
"I'd love to see that," came a cool voice. The three whirled around to see none other than Draco Malfoy flanked by Theodore Nott and Gregory Goyle. "Go on then, MacDuff, let's see what you've got." He was smirking in the most insufferable way possible.
"Like I'd do anything you wanted, Malfoy," Genevieve spat. His eyebrows rose clear into his hairline at that and he whistled lowly. Theodore Nott scoffed. Hermione and Ginny scowled. "You're an absolute tosspot," Genevieve all but growled at him. She stalked up to the counter, intent on ignoring everyone from then on and placing her order. Her spine stiffened as she felt and heard someone approach her from behind. She could feel the gooseflesh break out on her arms and the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. She had known it was a bad idea to leave the flat.
"You got a problem with me, MacDuff?"
"Who doesn't," she muttered as she watched the cashier scoop the ice cream. He narrowed his eyes thoughtfully and she was alarmed to find that they flashed with amusement. Either he was enjoying bullying her or he enjoyed how cross she was with him. Berk. "You act like the world owes you something. Your family's rich. I can't imagine there being anything you need."
He smirked and there was something in that smirk of his that was decidedly suggestive. "You'd be surprised."
"Surprised by your disgusting greed and selfishness," Ginny sniffed, crossing her arms and leaning closer to Genevieve to show that though they had originally been fighting, she was clearly siding with the brunette, "Not at all likely."
The smirk dropped from his face and he scowled at Ginny as his fingers twitched in her direction. Genevieve wasn't the only one who noticed. Hermione was staring at his twitching fingers with one raised eyebrow. She didn't seem as bothered by the confrontation as her other two companions. In fact, it seemed more like she was trying to hide her fascination with the situation. She was currently studying Draco as if he were a Muggle science project. She was trying her hardest to maintain an air of fierce disdain as she looked at him, but the longer he engaged the three girls, the more her facade crumbled. Ginny was too preoccupied in a battle with the Slytherin boy over who could look more superior by the second. While Genevieve had to give Ginny credit where it was due, nobody could ever outdo Draco Malfoy. The boy made self-confidence, grace, intellect-everything he represented, really-obscene. These traits weren't something he just oozed out. He was made of them.
Genevieve frowned. Or maybe she just felt that way because she really loved to snog him. Her heart dropped to her toes for the third time in the last five minutes. "I just wanted some ice cream," she mumbled forlornly to no one in particular, wilting slightly in the presence of all the animosity her new-found friends and her significant other were radiating.
Draco's cool demeanor faltered for no more than a second at her soft yet sad statement. It hadn't been long enough to register on his expertly schooled features, but it had been long enough for someone who would have been looking for any sign of weakness, which is exactly what his redheaded opponent was doing. She blinked once, her expression unchanging as she watched Draco's expression slide over to Genevieve and narrow considerably. Usually, on any other Slytherin it would have looked scrutinizing and almost disinterested in its indifference, but Genevieve knew this look well. Draco was studying her, gauging her emotions in a way that was not at all predatory.
It was then Goyle made his forgettable presence known by pushing past all of them roughly in order to get to the counter. His hunger had taken over and his usual amusement at watching Draco belittle a Weasley had been overshadowed, so much so that he shoved Genevieve a bit too roughly and she toppled into Draco violently. Her entire body collided with his as she flailed in an attempt to regain her balance. For a brief moment, her face was pressed to his chest, cheek to pectoral and she reached up to steady herself by grabbing onto his upper arms unconsciously at the same time that Draco wrapped an arm around her to steady her.
Theodore Nott had taken the commotion as his chance to slip in beside his famished companion, completely missing the startled look Genevieve shot his large friend. And he certainly missed the completely outraged look on his blond leader's face. A look, that under any other circumstances, he would have directed toward the witch who was pushed into him. Ginny Weasley scowled at the back of the two boys' heads and then opened her mouth to snap at Draco for letting his two dunderheaded associates knock her friend about like a rag doll when she froze, the angry look on her face morphing into something more consistent with complete and utter shock.
Draco Malfoy's scowl seemed almost vicious as he glared at the back of Gregory Goyle's head, one arm still curled around Genevieve's waist in a way that seemed gentle. He was clenching his jaw so tightly it nearly pulsed. His pale skin was pink with anger and the muscles in his neck were straining under the tension that radiated off of him. They looked as if they were about to snap.
Hermione coughed at that moment and the pair broke apart as if scalded. Malfoy shot the brunette a glare that seemed less fiery than usual, but the scowl on his face was still as demeaning as ever. Genevieve frowned up at him in mournful displeasure as she pulled at the hem of her jumper, which had become slightly askew during her tumble into the Slytherin. He clenched his jaw tighter before turning away from her dismissively and stepped up beside Nott, bumping his shoulder more violently than necessary. Nott in turn jolted into Goyle who didn't notice in the slightest as he continued to give the harried clerk his rather tall order.
Hermione let out a long suffering sigh and then tried to give Genevieve a comforting smile. But Genevieve continued to stare at the back of the three Slytherin's with the same depressed frown. Was it just her or was Draco intentionally trying to ruin the holidays for her? She rubbed at the cheek that had collided with his chest and glanced over at Ginny, who was glaring daggers at the back of Draco's head. He nearly shoved Genevieve over once he'd pushed her away.
Ginny began mumbling something about "inbred wankers" under her breath and Hermione shushed her when she noticed Malfoy tense up even more. Genevieve just stared off into space. Being in the same place as Draco was causing her insides to riot. She couldn't decide whether she wanted to break down and sob or cling to him in a fashion that would be more than pathetic. She was still trying to understand just what he was trying to accomplish by ignoring her. It was made worse by the fact that there was no one for her to turn to, no one for her to talk to. They all would have looked at her as if she had gone completely mental if she were to tell them that she had been spending time with Draco Lucius Malfoy for the last five years, snogging him for the past few months. Katie would probably stop speaking to her. Leanne would follow Katie's example, of course. Angelina and Alicia would call her every name in the book. Ginny would hex her into oblivion. Hermione-well, she wasn't sure what Hermione would do, but she was sure it wouldn't be pleasant. But if Hermione knew, Harry and Ron would then know, which would mean that everyone would then know. And then she really would be alone. No parents and no friends. What a gloomy prospect. It seemed best to suffer in silence.
Suffering in silence was torture. Standing in the same ice cream parlor as him was torture.
"Gen, are you even listening," Ginny asked loudly, bringing Genevieve from her morose thoughts. She looked over at the youngest Weasley. "No, sorry, what did you say?"
"I said, Fred and George got a letter from Angelina. She mentioned that Oliver Wood made it onto Puddlemere United as a reserve keeper. Can you believe that?"
"Good for him," she said absently. She still wasn't sure what ice cream she wanted. Maybe the sugariest thing they had. A scoop of everything might do it. "He was a good keeper, right? I never really followed Quidditch."
Ginny made a noise somewhere between a strangled cry of horror and a shriek of disbelief. "He was a brilliant keeper. And the fittest bloke ever."
"That's nice," she sighed. Did she want sprinkles? Maybe she'd just stick to fudge. And caramel. No nuts though. Ginny continued to huff while Hermione tossed amused looks between the two of them. "I told you she wouldn't care, Ginny."
"I don't see why she wouldn't, he was an absolute dream. Remember his smile."
"He always reminded me of hot chocolate," Genevieve said absently. Maybe walnuts. She felt she may be in the mood for them. She'd know once they reached the counter. Nott was finally placing his order. Goyle was in the middle of stuffing his face while he waited for Nott and Draco. There was a ring of fudge around his mouth. She wouldn't be getting fudge. "Hot chocolate is my favorite drink."
Hermione raised an incredulous eyebrow at her. Ginny gave her a strange look. "What an odd thing to say."
Genevieve flushed vividly when she noticed the way Draco's head turned the barest bit so that he was able to stare at her out of the corner of his eye. He looked less than pleased with her in that moment. Neither Ginny nor Hermione noticed. "Whatever does that mean," Ginny asked, turning completely to look at her. Genevieve felt her scalp begin to tingle. "Just that-you know...he's warm, friendly, he seems like a gentleman. Like hot chocolate?" She couldn't help ending it questioningly with the wide eyed stare her two friends were giving her.
Ginny burst out laughing. "What?"
Genevieve cringed inwardly, wishing she were capable of crawling into herself and disappearing. "Nevermind. It was stupid." Hermione had covered her mouth and was looking anywhere but at the pair. She cringed inwardly as Ginny's laughter crescendo-ed and she actually bent over in her fit of laughter. She rolled her eyes. "It was just a silly observation I had first year," she mumbled in displeasure. Whipped cream. She would replace the fudge with whipped cream. Did they have white chocolate truffle fudge?
"Did you ever have a thing for him," Ginny giggled delightedly. Genevieve scoffed, clearly affronted by her friend's bold question. "Of course not. I hardly knew him. I think I can safely count on one hand the number of times we conversed. That's hardly a reason to fancy someone."
"Oh," Ginny sighed in disappointment as her laughter died off. "Well, aren't you interested in anybody?"
"Ginny, her parents," Hermione reminded her delicately. "I doubt finding a boyfriend is high on her list of priorities."
"True," Ginny murmured, looking suddenly apologetic. She continued anyway, though it seemed she was choosing her words carefully. "But it is her sixth year. And I've yet to hear of her going on a single date, let alone snogging anybody."
"Have you snogged anybody," Genevieve shot back defensively. Ginny didn't even bat an eye. "Of course. I snogged Neville after the Yule Ball my third year."
"Well," Genevieve breathed. She had no idea what to say to that. Ginny tilted her head to the side, thinking. "You know, I bet Harry's a good snog."
Genevieve watched as Hermione practically choked on her tongue, worried she might have to give the poor girl CPR. She slapped her on the back just to be on the safe side. "I think maybe we should change the subject-"
"Please," Malfoy snapped as he shoved past her, "nobody cares about your pathetic love lives."
The three girls staggered backward and Genevieve lost her balance even more so when she felt the tiniest bit of warm pressure in her right hand as someone pressed a bit of folded parchment into it. She stuffed the note in her pocket quickly.
"Shove off, Malfoy," Ginny spat at his back as she glared at him. He waved her off dismissively as he and his friends went to sit at a booth nearest to the door. She let out a growl and rolled her eyes. "What an insufferable git."
The three girls each placed their orders and then sat at a table as far from the three Slytherins as possible. Genevieve listened half-heartedly as the two girls chatted away about the gifts they had gotten their friends and family. She frowned when she realized she wasn't certain if she should buy Draco anything. Had he broken up with her? It was a stupid question considering she wasn't even all that sure they had been dating in the first place. They'd really only snogged mostly. Sometimes there was some under the sweater foreplay, but he never tried to go under her bra, for which she had been thankful. She wasn't sure she was ready for that yet. Not that there would ever be a time she would be now that she no longer knew where she stood with him.
Draco Malfoy was becoming much too complicated a subject for her. He fogged her brain completely. Why on earth did she subject herself to this? She should just burn the note when she got home. It was probably a break up note anyway. The thought made her ill. She frowned down at her empty ice cream dish and pushed it away. All that sugar she had needed so desperately not long ago was suddenly making her stomach churn.
Hermione and Ginny were laughing about something the Weasley twins had done to Mrs. Weasley and Genevieve found she couldn't be bothered to care. She didn't care about much these days anymore. She felt hollow, empty. The only time she felt anything was when she thought of Draco. Or when she dreamt of her parents. In her dreams there was blood. Her mother was laying in a pool of her own blood on the floor, horror and pain twisting her features. It scared her. She always woke up drenched in sweat with her heart beating so rapidly in her chest she was sure it was going to tear through her sternum, killing her instantly.
Thinking of Draco was not entirely pleasant now that she wasn't sure of the status of their relationship-if they had ever been in one at all-but the familiar feeling of butterflies had been there when she'd seen him. It had intensified when she'd heard his voice, and her entire body had felt as if it was on fire and vibrating like a tuning fork. The second his cool gaze had zeroed in on her, her entire body had gone up in flames and the vibrating had gone so out of control, she felt as though someone were blowing a fog horn in her ears for a moment. It was a wonder nobody had commented on it. It had been sensory overload. She'd wanted to crawl further inside herself and claw her skin off at the same time. Anything to get away from him. Nothing and nobody had ever evoked such a violent physical response from her and it was unimaginably terrifying. The realization that she wasn't completely certain about how Draco felt about her was equally as terrifying.
Sure, he'd admitted to liking her, but he'd also snogged Pansy and possibly done more with her. Did that mean he only liked her as much as he liked Pansy, who he wasn't really quite so close with anymore? Pansy had been trailing after Draco in vain recently. He barely gave her the time of day any more. When he did, it was only because she was making fun of someone in a way that was all too cruel. What really bothered her though, was how easily he had abandoned Pansy the moment he had discovered Genevieve reciprocated his feelings. Did that mean the same fate would befall her should a much more attractive female make her intentions toward him known? Would he drop her the moment another girl batted her eyelashes at him?
Genevieve never would have had all these doubts if it weren't for the cold shoulder he was giving her. He'd been tossing her winks and teasingly haughty smirks in the hallways and corridors ever since their first kiss. He'd barely acknowledged her presence today.
She cast a guarded glance over toward his booth. He was lounging almost languidly in his seat, alone on his half of the circular booth. He was as relaxed as a Slytherin, let alone Malfoy, could be in public and he looked appropriately bored with equal amounts of disdain and an all too palpable air of superiority as his gaze slowly slid over his surroundings.
"Gen, are you alright?"
She shook out of her thoughts and looked to her companions. The two looked concerned and sympathetic. Ginny, for once, seemed unable to find anything to say and Hermione's gaze slid over in the direction Genevieve had been staring and her expression became both thoughtful and puzzled as she looked back at the brunette sitting across from her. Genevieve looked down at the tabletop and gave a half-shrug.
"I'm dealing with a lot right now," she mumbled, fiddling with a crumpled up napkin, "it's really hard trying to be happy right now."
Genevieve sighed and looked at them imploringly. "Can we please go home?"
The two girls across from her shared a look before they nodded, Ginny sighing in defeat as they all stood. After the two younger girls had walked her back to her flat, Ginny stopped her before she shut the door after thanking them and bidding them goodbye. "You know you won't be able to shut yourself up like this once term starts back up, don't you?"
She nodded solemnly. "I know. But for now, I think I'd prefer to be shut up."
Ginny nodded once and turned to leave while Hermione gave a feeble attempt at a wave as she turned to follow the outspoken redhead. Genevieve shut the door and locked it. She bypassed her shopping bags and flopped down the on the couch, letting out a long sigh as she pinched the bridge of her nose. At the moment, she was sorely questioning her choice to attend Hogwarts when she had been younger. At the moment it seemed like a highly unrealistic choice. Her eyes burned with tears as she thought of this; it made her feel as though she finally understood them and their reluctance. They had been trying in the only way they knew how to protect her without smothering her.
She rubbed at her eyes, ignoring the fact that she had most likely smeared her eyeliner and finally, pulled the note from her pocket. She stared at the folded parchment in trepidation. It would either say something good, or something bad. While knowing something uplifting would make her feel much better, knowing something horrible would certainly send her into a tailspin.
Genevieve rubbed her eyes once more before unfolding the paper before she lost her nerve.
Vivvy,
It's not safe for us to be in contact anymore. My mother somehow found out about your true blood-status. I think it would be best if we didn't contact one another until we return to Hogwarts. I miss you.
Draco
Genevieve crumpled the note in her hand and tried to steady her breathing. While it hadn't been horrible news like she had expected, it hadn't exactly been brimming with positivity. There was no way to fix this situation, she knew. She and Draco weren't exactly given much room to work with in which to have a relationship and she was very under-experienced with matters of the heart. And sometimes, it seemed that Draco was also at a loss. Throw in a war and suddenly being orphaned things just seemed to get that much more desperately hopeless.
She passed the rest of the holidays with little cheer. Kreacher and Sirius checked in on her often. Kreacher would often spend hours with her, cleaning areas of the flat that weren't very much in need of it. He made her kettle after kettle of tea, made her several batches of tarts. "Your Grandmother's favorite. Loved them she did," he had exclaimed as he placed a small tray of them on the coffee table and handed her a fresh cup of tea.
She smiled her thanks and sipped from the cup delicately as she watched him bustle about cleaning up imaginary messes. He made her feel less lonely when he fussed around the house like that. She was not looking forward to leaving for school. Human contact was vastly unappealing at the moment. She truly wanted none of hoped desperately that the feeling did not extend to Draco, but there was an oppressive air of despair that seemed to surround her and cloak her like a thick blanket she simply could not throw off. It grew heavier by the day and intuitively, she knew, this feeling would not leave her for a very long time.
Sorry for the not updating sooner. I had a death in the family and then I had a baby. It's not easy taking care of two when one is a complete Momma's boy. I've been really anxious to get back to writing. I was only able to write up two chapters when everything king of went to hell in a handbasket, so I'm sorry. Now that I can kind of update now, I weill be doing so as often as possible. The chapters will still be slow in coming, please forgive me for that.
Again, sorry for the long wait, I hope you like this chapter. Please review. Negative or positive, I love my feedback.
