Chapter 9

The couple drove home quietly. Starsky worried that he'd completely shown his girl up at the restaurant with his lack of knowledge of the finer aspects of Polynesian cuisine although he felt absurdly proud of himself that he'd managed to keep his notorious temper in check. But still. Ramsey had made him feel like a country bumpkin come up to the big city as a treat when what he'd really wanted was a quiet romantic meal with his girl. He had a suspicion that the lawyer had known all along that he and Gina would be at Le Gauguin that night, but he couldn't figure out how. Although he did promise himself that he'd find out sooner or later.

Gina on the other hand was quiet for a very different reason. Her dalliance with Ramsey two nights ago had left her feeling raw and vulnerable but as time passed she had almost convinced herself that Starsky would never get to find out what had gone on. Now, with the surprise arrival of the photographs she was once again antsy and on edge, her mind going over the facts. She felt sick to her stomach that once again her boss had some kind of hold over her when all she'd wanted to do was get out of his life and out of his sight. Now she was trapped. Trapped into doing whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted it, all because of one lousy slip of her judgment.

The car drew to a stop in front of her apartment and Starsky turned off the engine. He turned to her and put his arm around her shoulders drawing her to him.

'How's your head honey? Feeling any better? I'm sorry. I wanted tonight to be so special for us.'

She smiled weakly. 'And it was for a while. I guess the only saving grace is we left Ramsey to pay the bill.'

'Hey we did!' The brunet's face lit up for a moment at the thought. When he'd seen the prices on the menu he'd gotten a sudden pain in his wallet and although he was by no means a cheapskate, he suddenly felt vindicated for the misery the lawyer had put him through.

'Shall I come up an' tuck you in?' he asked with a slight wiggle of his eyebrows.

'No! No, I'm fine. I just need to take some aspirin and lie down. A night's sleep will see me right' Gina lied, hating herself for doing it. The brunet looked so crestfallen, but she hardened her heart.

'I'll phone you tomorrow' he assured her as she got out of the car and walked up the steps to her house.

'Um, no, don't do that' she said quickly, not wanting Ramsey to have any more contact with her man. 'I'll um…. I'll phone you.'

'Oh, ok…. Fine' he said softly, unsure whether that was a brush off or a definite headache. Starsky watched her go, still unsure whether the headache was genuine or whether she felt ashamed to have been out with him. He sighed. As long as he lived he didn't think he'd ever figure women out properly. He needed male company, and specifically he needed one male's company - the only guy who he could sit down with a bare his soul to. Hutch. Turning the car in the direction of Venice Place, he motored slowly through town, letting his Torino haven sooth away the stresses of the evening. He always felt cocooned in his car, like it was a sanctuary of sorts and for a little while he enjoyed just cruising quietly, by himself. But eventually he pulled up outside his friend's apartment and got out. Looking up at the front window, he saw the light on and bounded up the steps two at a time.

Starsky paused, wondering whether to knock or not. Of late Sarah had almost moved in and he didn't want to spoil any special moments the two of them might be having. He rapped once on the door and throwing caution to the wind, he pushed it open and poked his head around it, but instead of seeing the couple, he saw only Sarah. She looked up, Hutch's name on her lips and a stormy look in her eyes and for a moment, the brunet wondered whether to back out and disappear down the steps again. One uncomfortable encounter in an evening was enough and from what his partner had been telling him, he didn't think he wanted to get on Sarah's bad side. He smiled at her and looked around cautiously.

'Is Hutch home yet?'

'Does it look like he is?' the girl snapped.

'Um….no. I'll um….I'll just go' the cop muttered seeing the set of her back and the frosty look on her face.

'Why don't you? If it wasn't for you he'd be home by now.'

Starsky paused on his ay through the door and turned. 'How d'ya figure that one out?' he asked as calmly as he could.

'Because where you go he follows. And frankly Dave, I'm sick of it!' she said with barely suppressed rage.

'Oh now hang on a minute Sarah. His bein' late has nuthin to do with me. I rang an' told ya where he was. He's at the hospital with Al….a witness. His choice to stay, I didn't force him. I've been out tonight. I didn't know he hadn't come home.'

'But you came looking for him at…' she looked at her wristwatch '…. just past midnight. And you tell me you and he aren't seeing too much of each other? This isn't an engagement. This is a crowd. This marriage, if it ever happens is gonna be like you being a third member of our relationship, and let me tell you Dave two's company and three is most definitely too many.'

'What the hell? What's your problem honey? If ya have sumthin to say, ya should be sayin' it to Hutch, not me.'

'I'm saying I think he sees too much of you. It's not natural for two men to see as much of each other as you do. You work together all day then you see each other almost every night and most weekends. It's you two that should be getting married, not me and Hutch.'

The brunet stood open mouthed. 'Where the hell do you get off talkin' to me like this?' he asked, his temper rising in line with hers. 'You aint much of a friend to him if ya can't let him outa your sight. You know your trouble honey? You're jealous. You're jealous of the friendship me an' Hutch have got coz ya know you'll never have anythin' like it. It's special. It's not a marriage thing, it's closer than that an' you can't hack that you can't have him all to yourself. You got no business sticking your beak into police business or into Hutch's friendship.'

'I have every business! It's you that's no good for him. Don't you realise you're holding him back? Don't you realise it's you that's no good for him Dave?'

The comment was like a pail of cold water poured over him and Starsky stopped in his tracks. 'What? What're ya talkin' about?'

'Aww don't come the innocent with me. You trying to tell me you have no idea?'

'Of what?' the brunet asked.

'Of what he gave up to look after you when you were recovering after the shooting.'

'What did he give up?' Starsky asked quietly. That part of his life was still raw for him. The time in his life when he felt fragile; emasculated; when only Hutch could get him through the pain and the boredom and the misery. His voice was small as he asked, his mind dreading the answer.

But Sarah was relentless in her pursuit of telling the man exactly what she thought of him. 'He gave up everything for you. You know they asked him twice to go for his lieutenant's exams. And he refused. Because of you. You hold him back Dave. You're holding his career back and it's time to let go. The best thing you could do for your partner is to let go so that you can continue your cozy little existence as a detective and my Hutch can make something of his life.' She stood panting slightly from her outburst as Starsky's heart rose into his mouth.

Shit. Hutch had given all that up for him and he never knew. It was so like the blond to keep that to himself but that wasn't an excuse. That was wrong. Sarah was right. He was holding his partner back. Starsky staggered backwards as though he'd been physically hit, right into the body of the man they'd been arguing about.

Hutch looked grey with exhaustion and stood in the doorway looking at the two people in his apartment.

'What's goin' on?' the blond asked softly.

'Nothing' Sarah said quickly and turned away. 'Dave was just leaving.'

'Yeah….um I'll um…. I'll see ya tomorrow buddy. I'm sorry I crowded ya both. I should be goin'.'

'That's the first sensible things I've ever heard you say' Sarah said in a barely audible voice as Hutch looked at her oddly.

Starsky stifled a moan and backed out, running down the steps as fast as he could. He got into his car and drove as fast as he could away from the apartment as Hutch turned on Sarah

'What just happened?' he asked calmly.

'It's ok, we had a bit of a fight. Nothing much. He wanted to come round for some conversation, and he had it. He was just going anyway.'

'He looked upset. What did ya say to him?' Hutch asked, genuinely worried for his partner. 'It didn't look like nothing much. It looked like you'd had a real doozy of a blow. Spill it Sarah. What did you say?'

The girl turned and faced the blond straight on. 'Nothing. I just told him to back off. You needed space, that's all. And you do. So do I Hutch. Just some time for us, huh? Please?'

'We get time to ourselves. All the time we need.'

'No we don't. I just want you for myself for a while Hutch. Just some time to sit and cuddle and make love whenever we want. But instead you always have to go places, usually with him.'

'He's my partner honey. An' as a cop I don't have much say in when we work an' when we don't.'

She put her hand up to his face and smoothed down his cheek. 'Make love to me Hutch. Make love to me now' she whispered and nuzzled at his throat where she knew he was the most sensitive. The blond sighed against her, enjoying for a moment the ministrations of her talented mouth against his tired skin. Her hands pulled on his tee shirt, pulling it up so that she could stroke the smooth flesh beneath and he almost purred as she ran her hands down his flanks, settling back onto his sofa so that he could put his arm around her and draw her to him.

For long minutes they lay together, Sarah soothing her man and Hutch enjoying the moment. But the emotions of the day, the late hour and the warmth of the room all took their effects on him and despite his best efforts his eyes closed and he started to drift into a sleep he so desperately needed. Sarah felt his body relax and gently she shook his shoulder.

'Hutch?'

'Mmm, not now Starsk' the blond murmured and tried to turn away.

It was completely the wrong thing to say of course and the temper that had been quietly subsiding in the woman's chest suddenly flared to life again.

'What did you just call me?' she yelled and hit out at Hutch's arm.

The blond lurched awake. 'What? Dunno. I'm sorry honey I was so tired.'

'You called his name. You're sick, you know that. This just confirms what I thought. You don't love me and you certainly don't need me. You need him. You should marry him and be done with it.' Sarah got up of the sofa and glared down at her man.

'Sarah you're tired. Don't let's do this tonight huh? Just put it down to exhaust…'

'No, I won't be pacified like a little girl! I told him he was no good for you. I told him he held you back; he stopped you reaching your full potential.'

'You did what?' Hutch's temper also flared and he bounced of the sofa and grabbed Sarah's shoulders. 'You told him what?' he yelled.

'I told him you spend too much time together' she shouted defiantly.

Hutch threw her down onto the chair, his chest heaving as he tried to get himself under control. 'You little vixen. You selfish little bitch! You had no right, no right at all to tell him that. He's more of a friend to me than you'll ever be an' yes, if I could I would marry the man. At least he's not jealous of every word I utter to someone else.'

Sarah looked at the flaxen haired man with fear in her eyes. She'd never seen Hutch quite like this and it took her completely off guard. 'I only wanted what was best for you' she said in a small voice. 'I only wanted you to ….'

'You wanted me to be your sole property. Is that it? Well it won't work that way honey. Me an' Starsk have been through more shit than I ever though humanly possible an' that makes us tight, got it? There's no way I'd ever let our friendship go, for you or anyone else. And if you can't hack it, then you should probably leave now.'

'Don't worry I will' she spat back at him. 'I don't want to be in a three way relationship. But mark my words Hutch. He'll drag you down to his level an' I won't be there to pick up the pieces.'

Hutch glared at her 'The only think I want you to pick up is your bag. An' be outa here when I get back' he snarled as he headed for the door.

The woman got to her feet. 'Where are you going?'

'To see the man whose gonna drag me down to his level. From what you've told me, he's gonna be hurtin' and he'll need a friend. Somethin' I don't think you have the first notion about. Goodbye Sarah' he said as he closed his front door behind him.'