Hours later, the arl's estate was silent save for the patrolling guards. Most everyone was sleeping including Azriæl. When she finally got everything out, no one was sure exactly what to do. Even after Morrigan, Leliana, Zevran and Alistair had demanded for her to tell them what had been going on. It was only Alistair and Leliana who were surprised what happened after her tale.
When everything seemed to dry up. Her tears were gone, her voice was again void of any emotions, and she seemed back to her… empty self. Her eyes did show her weariness and they could all see how Azriæl was having a hard time just keeping upright. So with some help, Azriæl stripped of most of her armor and pulled the sheets around her.
The four companions left her room; they all needed to get some rest anyway. They were already busy when the sun rose in half a day. Morrigan and Leliana had decided to go to their respective rooms, but neither Alistair nor Zevran could. Alistair was at a complete lost with Azriæl and Zevran was actually worried about both of them. The elf knew the elder Warden would need some advice.
The two men sat in the dining hall, lit only by the fireplace. A servant had brought them a few drinks before excusing herself for the night. Zevran waited patiently for Alistair to erupt, knowing it would never take long. He watched as the man across from him visible showed his confusion. They had both gone through their first mug before either of them finally spoke, but it was Alistair first.
"How? How could she not know how we feel about her? How I feel about her and how could just agree to Anora?" Alistair finally asked, "Does she not care for me?"
"I do not think it is that or that simple, my dear friend." Zevran replied softly, "You really haven't show much in the way of, oh let us say, a sexual desire. Alistair, you show the care for a companion. You heard our dear Warden; she feels nothing so you would need to feel it for the both of you first."
"You… you have then?" Alistair asked, almost jealous.
"She and I confessed some attractions, but I think I might have said the wrong things…"
"You said the wrong things? Now that seems hard to believe. What could you have said that would shut her off like that?" Alistair asked.
"Yes, it seems highly unlikely. Given my charm, but I told her that if something bad should happen… that I could find pleasures elsewhere." Zevran admitted before taking a rather large drink.
"Oh that's bad, but I really can't make fun of you given my not so charm." Alistair joked, "So, you really think Azriæl had given up on… everything?"
"Besides the will to kill the archdemon… Yes." Zevran stated, "And I don't like it one bit. She isn't the same Warden that saved my life."
"Not one of us do, Zevran." Leliana stated from the doorway.
"Couldn't sleep, my dear?" Zevran smiled.
"I wanted to check in on Azriæl. She seems sound asleep."
"Let's hope she is sleeping." Alistair replied, taking another sip.
"Such depressing thoughts Alistair, no wonder Azriæl…"
"Don't say it." Alistair interrupted her, "Zevran has already made that point clear."
"Sorry, Alistair." Leliana smiled, sitting next to the elf.
"So I have a question for you, Zevran. You're here, at least in part, to get away from the Crows, right?" He asked, his eyes starting to red from the alcohol.
"That is indeed true." Zevran nodded, taking another drink.
"So when this is over, what do you intend to do with yourself? You can't go back to Antiva, I assume." Alistair slurred.
"What I do depends in large part upon your fellow Grey Warden. I am not a free man, as it were." Zevran replied, wondering where this was going.
"Yes, yes…" Alistair said, waving his hand, "But what if you could do whatever you wanted?"
"Why should I go anywhere? You Grey Wardens are the epitome of charm and hospitality." Zevran laughed, watching as Alistair gulped down more of his ale.
"So you do intend to go back to the Crows?"
"I said no such thing. I think I should stay where I am. Ferelden is a marvelous country." Zevran feigned hurt.
"Why don't I believe you?" He eyed the elf…
"Oh, I don't know. Aren't you going to be king? Perhaps you have people you need killed?" Zevran replied innocently.
"I probably do, yes." Alistair shrugged.
"See? It's that sort of thinking that makes me think I have a future in this fine country of yours." Zevran laughed, drinking the last of his ale.
"That's assuming I would hire you."
"That's the lovely thing about kings. They make for good business, as the client or the target." Zevran countered.
"And people wonder why someone might not want to be king." Alistair shook his head, finishing his drink.
"We need to go to bed. Something tells me if we aren't ready when Azriæl is, then we're going to be left behind." Leliana said smiling.
The two men nodded and followed the bard out of the dining hall. She helped them up to the top of the stairs before heading towards her room. Zevran started walking to the arl's room, where most of the men were resting, but stopped when Alistair didn't follow. He watched as the Senior Warden headed in the opposite direction, towards Azriæl's room.
"And what exactly are you doing, my dear Alistair?" Zevran questioned, following behind.
"I have to know." Alistair stated simply.
"And this cannot wait until morning?" Zevran dodged in front of Alistair, stopping the man in his tracks, "Well, I can tell you that she does not. You haven't made even a step, an inch towards how you feel about her. Everything has been about you." Zevran added, pointing a finger into Alistair's chest.
"What are you getting at Zevran?" Alistair asked, the ale taking over.
"You will not ask her anything. She cares for you as she does all of us." Zevran accused in a hushed tone, "But she does not love you."
"You don't know that." Alistair shot back.
The both jumped when the door to Azriæl's room opened to a very angry, but tired woman. She motioned for both of them to get into the room and shut it behind them. To their surprise, she still had half her armor on, though neither said anything. Azriæl finally went back to the bed and sat down.
"You both need to be quieter… and less drunk." She stated, crossing her arms.
"My dear Azriæl, Alistair here still insists you explain your true feelings… for him." Zevran stated, obviously upset.
Azriæl knew Zevran was trying to protect her, especially when it came to other men… or Alistair. Even after baring her heart's story, Alistair still felt like he was the most wronged from Loghain. None of the others tried to compare themselves to either of the Wardens, mainly because they had known the risks and faced the consequences.
"Alistair, you are so selfish and acting like a brat. You knew what being a Grey Warden meant; to you this was your dream. Our dear Azriæl was forced into this life, though she may have wanted to do so anyway. Either way, she unwillingly gave up everything. You relished the idea of being… somebody." Zevran had had enough, "This ends now, Alistair."
Zevran's anger even caught Azriæl off guard. She watched as the elf just laid it into the Senior Grey Warden. Though she didn't do anything, but sit there just in case he went off on her. She thought Alistair would have been shouting right back at the elf, but he didn't. It was like he was hearing this for the first time.
The ex-Crow was pointing out that even though Alistair had done a fair share of work, it was still he that always wanted something more, "You are acting as if this arch demon will just lie down for you to kill it. Do you not understand that we are going to be truly fighting for our lives in the next few days?"
"Yes, Zevran, I get it. I am not that selfish… am I?" Alistair asked, turning to Azriæl. The ale was still clouding part of his judgment, as he still asked her, "Do you love me Azriæl?"
Her simple reply even left the assassin utterly in shock, "No."
