Episode 58: Sex and The Ex.SPECIAL GUEST STARS:
ANGELA LANSBURY as Melissa
RICK MORANIS as Joey Parker
and Mara Wilson as Elena Parker.
DECEMBER 1998. EIGHT MONTHS TIL BABY WILSON...MCQUIRE IS BORN.
It's Jack Wilsons birthday and he is slowly recovering from his abrupt Meningitis scare, but his psychic and premonition abilities have somewhat disappeared. His memory had taken a hit, but the comfort and love of his family, he has been making progress and is excited that he is to be big brother. Unfortunately for the Wilson's and the Mcquire's, they are unaware, that Helen has lied about the surrogacy and is in fact pregnant with hers and Greg's baby. But, since Jack almost died, Helen couldn't bring herself to admit she didn't go through with the surrogacy, as she was already pregnant. The family do their best to entertain Jack on his birthday and is happy that Elena turns up with her father. Audrey spoils and fusses her grandson and starts dancing around like a teenager.
'I haven't seen your mother this wild since Bucks Fizz won the Eurovision Song contest back in the eighties,' Billy laughs.
'Buck's who?' Harry wonders.
'Let's put it this way, they sing better than she does,' Billy jokes.
Jeff shows up with a present for his nephew and Jack asks his uncle if he can take him for a ride in his police car and states that he wants to be policeman like his uncle when he grows up and wants to learn him everything he's learnt. Billy involuntarily spits his drink out when Jack says this, trying not to laugh. Harry and Tina look at each other, wondering if that's wise, but feeling warmed by his nephews words, Jeff hugs him. Jeff see's Chris is there, but Chris blanks him completely. Tina makes a toast to Helen for carrying Jacks brother. Little do they know, what she's hiding, especially an unsuspecting Greg.
George goes to see Chris in the Photography dark room and asks him if he fancies lunch? Chris claims he's too busy with work and hints that George should go out with a woman, who really loves him and not sleeps with married men. George begins to think what Chris meant by that.
Jeff and Jack bond as Jeff takes him for a ride in his patrol car. Jack notices a picture in the pocket of the sunshade of Jeff, Sylvia and Chris together. Jack reminds Jeff his memory is blurry and asks what happened to Sylvia? Jeff tells him, that angels took her to a safe place.
Melissa calls Audrey, who reminds her of her mystery date and that she should come round her house. Audrey agrees, bit is rather curious of what is going on? Melissa insists it's a surprise.
Harry and Tina take Jack to the doctor, who assures them, that Jack is slowly making a recovery.
Helen meanwhile, takes it slowly at work and stares in the mirror at herself and rubs her tummy, fighting the tears. Greg then arrives to take her home.
Chris see's Lola at the library and without making too much of spectacle of himself or Lola he tells her what he thinks of her.
'Harland wasn't the only one who killed my mother that night, you and the man I looked up to, stabbed her in the back too,' Chris whispers. 'Just make sure you let George know, if and when you intend to bed Jeff Wilson again. He's the only person left after Mom, that has kept me sane.'
Chris storms off.
Audrey shows up at Melissa's mansion, fifteen miles outside the city and is invited in. Melissa asks for a fee and Audrey pays her straight away. Audrey figures she is going for some sort of date, in which so many people are participating. She is not wrong about the people, but it's anything but a date, it's an orgy. Melissa had turned her home into a brothel for the over fifties. Audrey is shocked out of her to find many of Melissa house guests engaging in role play and she demands her money back. Melissa convinces her to stay and watch at least and to Audrey's horror she see's her Ex husband Billy, there butt naked. Billy is embarrassed and immediately both thinks they've been set up. Audrey stays after Billy offers her a drink, but she leaves her clothes on. After a while, Melissa decides to play songs asked for by the guests to be played during the sex acts and Melissa decides to play Audrey's.
'What did you order, 'Dream Lover' by Bobby Darin?' Billy asks.
'No, it was a. a...oh bloody hell,' Audrey gasps.
Melissa turns on the tape and as everyone prepare to make love, 'Making Your Mind Up' by Bucks Fizz begins to play. Billy cannot contain himself as everyone else is perplexed.
'You've got no excuse for not taking your clothes off now, babes,' Billy adds. 'I wanna make love to you Audrey, I miss you.'
'Oh what the hell,' Audrey smiles, as she takes her clothes off and her jumps into Billy's arms and makes love.
END OF EPISODE FIFTY EIGHT
