"WHAAAT! You almost kissed?!" Matsuri shouted while walking towards the train station, the cold crisp air blowing her pastel pink hair.

"Shhh! Keep it down!" Harumin tugged Matsuri's sleeve to keep the girl from getting more attention, as on lookers and bystanders stared at their direction.

"Technically, she almost kissed me," she whispered, her cheeks starting to look crimson from remembering the event that took place not too long ago. It was still a shock to her how it happened. Actually, she didn't want anyone to know, especially Matsuri, knowing she wouldn't let anything like this go. She was like a hound always out for blood. But her stupid ass grin wouldn't leave her face and the pink haired girl knew something happened inside Yuzu's room. So Harumin couldn't hold it in any longer and told her what happened.

"I can't believe it. That sly blonde minx" shaking her head, her soft curls gently swaying with the motion. Matsuri chuckled, "to think she almost kissed half of the gang! What the heck."

"Tell me, how did yours and Yuzu happen again?" Harumin suddenly asked, curious on the circumstance that led to that kiss. Back in high school, she was devastated when Yuzu casually told her that Matsuri kissed the blonde. She ended up weeping on the floor for her no longer sweet and innocent Yuzucchi.

"Ahh, welllll. I might have forced myself on her that one time." Matsuri said, hands in front of her, slowly backing away from her friend, as a precaution. Knowing Harumin was in love with Yuzu, she didn't know how the plum-haired girl would react regarding that story.

"To be fair, it was really a long time ago Taniguchi-senpai. Besides, Mei 'took back' that kiss from me." Fingers air quoting for emphasis.

"Oh my God! So Yuzu and Mei kissed, and you kissed Yuzu, and Mei kissed you?" her voice starting to rise. "Was high school a kissing frenzy?" Harumin was shocked. Where was I and what was I doing during that time?

"Oh I was really a different person then, Taniguchi-senpai. I did so many things that I admit I am not proud of" Matsuri said, remembering the time she almost got Mei in trouble by setting her up with a random stranger.

They got to the platform after swiping their train passes at the gate. After boarding the train, they were sitting silently throughout the ride. Sounds of whispers and laughter mixed inside the train, but Harumin paid no mind as her thoughts where elsewhere.

"Taniguchi-senpai!" Matsuri waved a hand in front of her face, catching her attention. "I asked you, what are you gonna do?"

"What am I gonna do about what?" she blinked several times, unsure on what she was being asked about. She looked around, and saw that they she was about four stations away from her stop. Matsuri is one station before hers.

"I mean, what are you gonna do now? After you know, almost kissing Yuzu-chan." Matsuri explained, looking at her earnestly.

"I don't know. I actually don't know." She sighed. "Obviously I'm happy that there's a sliver of hope for me. But at the same time I'm sort of scared now. We're best friends, and stepping over that line, it's scary. There's no going back. You know?" she looked at Matsuri, worry painted over her beautiful face. She couldn't ever imagine a life without Yuzu. Was this really the best thing to do?

"She's the most important person to me. What if I screw it up? What if I lose her in the process?" her head bowed, palms hiding her face, hair tumbling down the back of her hands. A heavy sigh escaping her lips. This was an unchartered territory she was terrified of crossing. At the same time, she knew was hopelessly in love with Yuzu. And the idea of someone else holding her hand, kissing her, or hugging her hurts like a thousand, no a million needles piercing her heart.

"You know, sometimes, things happen because they do. When we overthink it, we actually rob ourselves the opportunity to be happy. You can't win anything if you don't bet on anything." Matsuri squeezed her arm and looked away. "I learned that the hard way," she whispered to herself.

"When did you become so positive about love?" Harumin gazed at Matsuri. Disbelief was the first reaction she had when Matsuri gave that advice, and it was soon replaced with awe. She reached out and pinched both Matsuri's cheeks, stretching them as far as she can. "Where did you hide the real Matsuri!" she laughed.

Matsuri pried Harumins hand, then rubbing her sore cheeks. "Geez, it has been ten years. People can change." As she said this, an intercom buzzed indicating they were nearing Matsuri's stop. Harumin was thankful that Matsuri was there help her ease a bit of her worries. Though some still remained, but having someone to talk to somehow helped lift her spirit.

Matsuri stood up, ready to disembark at her stop. She was about to walk out the door when she turned to Harumi and said, "Taniguchi-senpai, let's just say I am heavily influenced by someone who believes that you and Yuzu can still be a possibility." She winked, and hurriedly left.

Harumi was too stunned to speak, her eyes just followed Matsuri exit the train, mouth wide open. What did she mean? Wait, it couldn't be. Or could it? Her and… No! Really? A small smile appeared on her lips.

After leaving the station, her walk home was silent, mind occupied by the thoughts of Yuzu.


Back in Yuzu's apartment, the blonde was a mess. After Mei left, she wasn't even able to finish the dishes. She just went to her bedroom and wept. She hated that after ten long years, she was still affected like this. She thought she was over Mei, but the pain in her heart now is a testament of the lingering feelings she had for the raven-haired girl. To what extent her feelings were, she did not know. She sighed loudly, turning her face towards the moonlight seeping in through her window. As the light gently hit her face, a steady stream of tears glistened in the dark.

As her tears continued to flow, she turned her body to her right, knees curled and thighs almost touching her stomach, positioned like baby in a mother's womb. Sobs rocked her entire body, her left hand clenching the bedsheet hoping to get some strength, any strength, on anything that she could hold onto. She found her pillow hugged it tight as she could. When her body could no longer hold it in, she wailed aloud.

After hours of crying, her body finally felt too tired and succumbed to sleep.


When Mei got to her home, she gently closed the door and whispered a tired "I'm home." The house was dead quiet as the helpers were already asleep in their quarters. She took off her shoes, haphazardly, and threw her coat on the floor. She wasn't in the right frame of mind nor emotion to care on the minor details. If it were any other day, not one item in her house would be out of place. But tonight, she didn't give any damn.

She slowly dragged her feet towards her study, wanting to get back to work and try to erase the bitter memories she had made that night. Neat piles of papers can be found on her desk, beside her array of pen and pencil holders. She carefully sat down, trying to at least start a semblance of order in what turned to be a chaotic night. Eyes closed, she inhaled and exhaled three big breaths to calm her nerves. As she opened, she took a piece of paper from the stack in front of her.

Reading the first paragraph, she found herself unsure on what she was reading, so she had to reread again. And again. And again. Frustration started building up as what was always her comfort zone – her work, no longer gave her the solace she could count on.

She sighed, and tried to read again the same paragraph. By the fifth word, she suddenly crumpled the piece of paper and threw at her desk. Her breath started to become uneven as all the pent up anger, jealousy and hatred started to rise. She stood up quickly, wanting to take control of it, hands gripping the edge the table, she closed her eyes. Without any preamble, tears started to well. She closed her eyes tighter to fight it, but her resolve finally crumbled. She let out a scream, and her left arm suddenly swung and swept most of the items on top of her table. Pen and pencil clanked on the wooden floor, papers flew in every direction.

Her body fell back to the chair, her hands covering her face, and tears falling freely.

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry" she kept repeating to herself.

All the times that Yuzu had looked at her with devotion and adoration blurred and was replaced by what she saw tonight. The image of Yuzu, looking at her with anger burned in her memory. She had never seen Yuzu look at her like that, save for tonight. She knew she had crossed the line. And now she didn't know what to do to make it right.

"You're. Right. I'm. Such. A. Coward." She took in sharp breaths with every word, shoulders shaking.

Remembering something, she stood up looking for her bag. When she found it, she quickly fished a set of keys. Walking back to her desk, she crouched down and juggled her keys. It took a while for her to find the right key as her eyes were blurred from the tears. Once the key was inside the lock, she wiped away her tears, and opened the bottom drawer. A lone box was inside the drawer, and she carefully took it out even though her hands were trembling. When she opened it, her breath hitched, like it would every time. Inside the box was her irreplaceable treasure.

"Yuzu. I'm so sorry." Mei cried anew, holding the ring in front of her chest.


Notes:

Things always get messy when you meet up with your ex, specially if you considered him/her the one.

Sooo instead of making my report due for presentation tomorrow, I ended up finishing this. PRIORITIES. :')