TRIGGER WARNING: Some violence and gore
As the World Turns
It wasn't like the dreams I usually had about him. Well… dreams, I say, but they were really visions that just happened to come to me whilst I slept. And when I did have these visions of Jasper they were always of his past, what happened to him, meeting Maria, the wars, going with Peter and Charlotte, wandering off, finding the Cullens, etc.
This time it was an actual dream.
I was a vampire, a newborn at a guess, because currently I was surrounded by other vampires facing another large-ish group of newborns. At the head of that group was Maria, and Jasper with blazing red eyes and all. Based on the clothing of the vampires surrounding me, I guessed 1920s.
Not only that, but my senses seemed to have intensified by 1000. I could hear every little shift of each and every vampire as they waited for the other group to make a move. Though the moon was just a sliver in the sky, I could see everything around me like it was high noon. I could smell the different scents of each vampire, it mixing into a cocktail that assaulted my nose. And a breeze against my skin felt like a gust of wind.
It was such a weird sensation, because I'd been avoiding this very outcome basically my whole life. To close my eyes and just… become one, threw me off balance, metaphorically speaking.
I would've thought about this more, but someone shifted wrong and suddenly they were running at each other, snarling, growling, and biting. I stayed where I was, unsure of what I was doing here or what I was supposed to do. Instead I watched as Maria and Jasper's newborn army raced past the two, careful to avoid hitting either of them, while they simply stood there and watched with fierce ruby eyes.
Around me the snarling and growling continued, along with sounds of vampires being ripped to shreds. Surprisingly none of the newborns had attacked me, but just as I thought that Maria locked eyes with mine. Without taking her eyes off of me, she tilted her head toward Jasper.
"Take care of that one for me, Jasper," she instructed. My eyes went from Maria to Jasper, who nodded, his eyes taking on a very determined gleam. Panic seized me and I had a moment of "oh crap" right before I turned and sprinted in the other direction as fast as I possibly could on instinct.
I heard Jasper's pursuing footsteps almost immediately and if my heart had still been beating it would've been double-timing it at the moment. I didn't want to chance looking behind me because I knew that would only freak me out more, however, either way I knew he was gaining, because the sounds of his footfalls were coming closer and fast. I pushed myself harder and just when I thought for sure it was over for me and I was going to jolt awake in my bed, I blinked and suddenly I was running through a forest.
A forest that looked eerily similar to the one in Forks, I was sure. I was also suddenly very human. My heart hammered painfully against my ribcage, blood roared in my ears, my breath came out in panting gasps, and my muscles screamed from oxygen deprivation. I stumbled and had to slow my pace, so I could easier avoid roots and rocks and bushes. I couldn't slow down too much, though, because Jasper was still right behind me! Only… he hadn't attacked, yet, which I found strange considering that I was human now, he'd have no trouble catching up to me.
Against my better judgment I started slowing, trying to desperately catch my breath in the process (besides, running almost blind in a forest, I was bound to hit something or trip over something anyway, even at my slowed speed). It was night still, and I was back to my poor night vision, but I could make out dark shapes. I was sure I'd be able to spot his white skin and red eyes against the darkness, but… looking around there was no sign of him.
My nerves spiked and the hairs on the back of my neck stood on end.
Of course, he could be hiding.
I spun around and looked up when I heard the rustling of leaves. Nothing that I could see. More rustling behind me. I spun once again, as a reflex reaction, but saw nothing yet again.
"Just get it over with, already!" I yelled angrily, clenching my hands into fists and gritting my teeth.
Someone behind me chuckled blackly and I spun around again to come face to face with Maria. She smiled maliciously.
"How brave," she remarked, approaching me slowly. I stumbled back, flustered, not having expected her appearance, and tripped over a tree root. My hands flew instinctively back to catch myself as I fell, and instead of breaking a wrist, my palm landed on a sharp rock, effectively cutting it open. I let out a yelp, pulling myself into a sitting position before examining my hand.
Blood oozed from the cut, the thick liquid looking black in such dim lighting.
I felt a small breeze and suddenly I was pinned to the forest floor, hands holding my wrists down, Jasper hovering over me his red eyes blazing with hunger.
The last of my energy reserves shot through my body and I started to uselessly struggle, trying to pull my wrists from his grasp. But he was a vampire, and I was a measly human. There was no comparison when it came to who was stronger in this situation.
Tears formed in my eyes and I started to beg him, "Please, don't… don't do this," I whispered through my tears. I saw pain and indecision flash in his eyes, but he took a breath and abruptly it was a war between the side that wanted to drink my blood and the side that felt my pain and my terror.
I didn't know which side was winning but figured it out pretty quickly when suddenly his lips were at my throat.
"No, no, please, don't," I sobbed quietly. He paused but for only a moment before I felt the pain of teeth ripping flesh, my flesh.
My eyes flew open. I was lying on my side, facing the door, in my bed at the Cullens' house. Blinking off the dream and the weariness in my eyes, I slowly sat up, lifting a shaky hand to my forehead to wipe off the sheen of sweat that had formed.
I closed my eyes and took a deep, slow breath to calm my nerves, Jasper's words echoed through my head: I am. I am a monster. I'm just… no good.
My hands fisted, picking up the bed sheets, and I gritted my teeth, keeping my eyes closed.
I didn't believe it.
I wouldn't.
The snow had come back full force. It wasn't like the snow in the mountains, it had a different texture to it, but ice was ice. There was nothing different about it here or in the mountains. I drove slow like the last time, but this time I may have used my ability to determine when to leave so that we'd get there at a reasonable time, and Cynthia wouldn't be mad at me. Thankfully, there were no accidents, van or otherwise.
The day passed quickly and soon enough it was lunch time. I was heading over there when Eric caught up with me. He was chattering excitedly about the snow before steering me outside where there were several snowball fights going on with other excited high schoolers. I spotted Mike, Jess, and Angela immediately having their own snowball fight along with a couple other of their friends, that I'd met before but couldn't think of their names. They hadn't spotted Eric and me yet, so I took this as a chance to escape a cold, wet future.
"Why don't we head inside for lunch?" I suggested, turning to Eric.
"You don't want to join?" he asked, looking and sounding disappointed but trying to hide it.
"You can if you want to, I want to stay dry, warm, and eat." I told him. He chewed his lip, looking out at all the fights going on before looking back at me.
"I'll… I'll walk you to the door and then go join them, okay?" he asked.
I smiled good-naturedly. "You don't need my permission, it's totally fine." I assured him. He relaxed and smiled before we started heading over to the cafeteria. Unfortunately half-way there, I hit a patch of ice.
My foot flew out from under me and I let out a yelp of surprise. Because Eric's arm had been around my waist, he had no trouble grabbing hold of me, except I only managed to pull him down, too, instead of not falling at all. It momentarily stunned me, but there was enough snow on the ground that it had softened my landing. Not a moment after I was laughing at the irony of the situation.
Eric joined in my laughter as we sat up and sat in the snow for a moment looking at all the childish teens before I looked back at him with a smile. He returned it with his own before slowly leaning in and just before we could kiss a snowball hit the back of his head. The impact had been hard enough to knock his glasses askew on his face. He jumped and looked around to see who threw it, reaching up to fix his glasses.
"Come on you two lovebirds! Save it for later!" Mike called, throwing another snowball at us. We both dodged. Eric gave me a peck on the cheek before getting to his feet while picking up snow for his own snowball and sprinting after Mike. I watched them, chuckling. I could feel the snow getting my pants wet as I sat there, but didn't feel like getting up just yet. So much for staying dry and warm.
A snowball from a different direction came at me from behind, right at my head. I tilted my head to the left a few degrees and the snowball whizzed past my ear before burying itself in the snow in front of me. I narrowed my eyes, examining it. It didn't look like the usual snowball, it looked more like an… ice ball. Without looking behind me, I slowly stood, scooping up the ice ball in some more snow and packing it together with my bare hands (I didn't think to bring gloves).
That's when I looked around for the culprit, though I knew who exactly I was looking for. I spotted him heading away at human pace with his siblings to the cafeteria. I smirked and zeroed in on the back of his curly-haired head before using all the strength I had and chucking it at him. My smirk grew into a grin as my snowball collided with its intended target.
He stopped and so did his siblings, but none of them turned around quite yet. Just then, Mike, Jess, Angela, and Eric decided to come up to me.
"Oh my God," Jess whispered, looking in the direction I was.
"Did you just hit Emmett Cullen with snowball?" Eric asked incredulously, which did no good to hide his fear.
"Are you out of your mind, Brandon?" Mike questioned.
"Maybe we should go inside now, like right now. Pretend someone else did it and that it was an accident." Eric suggested quickly, putting his arm around my waist and directing me toward the cafeteria doors. "Come on, let's go guys." They all followed his advice and started shuffling in the direction Eric and I had been heading before I'd slipped and he'd been attacked.
As we were heading off, though, I looked over my shoulder. Emmett had turned around now and was glaring at me ruefully. I reached up with one hand to pull one of my lower eyelids down while simultaneously sticking my tongue out at him before turning back around and following my friends into the lunch room.
Not to my surprise, the Cullens had made it to the lunch room before my friends could, their golden eyes were alight with amusement and they were all laughing. I couldn't help but smile, because I knew it was because Emmett had shaken out his hair, spraying water all over his other adopted siblings. As I got in line for food, Jasper looked up and over at me. Even though we weren't on the best of terms, we exchanged a smile before he turned back to his siblings. (And by this point, I had decided to ignore the dream I had about Jasper completely, a distant memory, nothing to note.)
I don't think I stopped smiling for the rest of the lunch period.
Half-way through, though something pricked my finger. It was painful enough that I jumped slightly and let out a small, "ow" before bringing my finger up to examine it. There was a small bead of blood coming from where I'd been pricked and I quickly picked up my napkin, wrapping it around my finger.
"You okay?" Eric asked, seeing this.
"Oh, yeah, I'm fine, I accidentally cut my finger—" I explained pulling the napkin away only to see no blood. Not on the napkin and not on my finger. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion and stared at my finger and napkin. How… strange. I laughed it off quickly and looked up at Eric again. "I guess I thought I did. False alarm. These tables look kind of weathered, maybe I just pricked it a bit."
To my relief Eric took this explanation and went back to the conversation going on at our table. I, however, looked back at my hand again. Still no blood, but I couldn't figure out why that'd happened. I knew it was a vision—I hated it when I got visions like these, they were so vague it didn't help at all—but I couldn't figure out for the life of me why I had it now and what pricking my finger had to do with anything going on in my life right now.
I let out a small sigh and looked around the cafeteria for any other signs. With visions like these they came in bits and pieces which I then had to put together. I suppose I shouldn't complain because I still got the whole picture, it's just I was so used to getting it all at once, I hated it when I actually had to work to figure something out. Especially if it was important. It wasted precious time.
I looked back down at my tray of food, but it was no longer a tray of food, it was a small white indicator card. The din of the cafeteria suddenly quieted and I lifted my head quickly looking around confused. I was in the Forensics classroom now. Everyone was chatting quietly as Mike passed out these small square, orange box-like things, and paper towels to everyone in the class. I looked to my left, but Jasper wasn't there. For a moment I thought I'd dozed off and somehow ended up in Forensics but I looked back down at the indicator card and realized something I should've when I first looked down.
I looked back up and suddenly I was back in the cafeteria, the noise level growing again.
Jeez, sometimes I hated visions.
I looked across the table I was at to the Cullens' table.
Edward, I called. He head snapped in my direction and our eyes met. Could you tell Jasper we're blood-typing today in Forensics? He nodded once. Thanks.
I tuned back into the conversation hoping I hadn't missed too much and lunch continued on. Obviously Jasper wasn't in Forensics that day, but I was still disappointed… not that I had much to be disappointed about, because as I said, we weren't on the best of terms, Jasper and I. After what happened at the dance, we kind of grew apart and the progress we had seemed to make after the van accident was null and void. This frustrated me to no end. It had been at least four weeks now since the dance that Jasper hadn't spoken to me at all, even when we sat next to each other in Forensics.
When he was here he still sat as far away from me as possible and we never talked. At all. Sure we'd only actually spoken once to each other, out loud during this period, and maybe three or four times in total, but now it was such an awkward silence. I could tell he was purposefully avoiding me. Aside from that brief interaction in the cafeteria he never even looked at me.
Okay, so maybe I'm over-exaggerating, he did talk to me, but only if he couldn't avoid it, like during labs, which, honestly, I didn't count.
Something good did come out of the snowball incident, though, I have to admit. Originally, I usually only stayed in the room the Cullens had given Cynthia and I, not wanting to impose on their lives, because I knew that that was the only place they could truly be themselves, and I felt me and my sister were encroaching on them and taking away some of that freedom, so I stayed in my room as much as possible (and instructed Cynthia to do that same, which she agreed to after at little persuasion). When I did go out, as I soon as I opened my door, I could just feel all of them stop what they were doing and retreat to their corners of the house, doors closed, until I went back into our room.
I wasn't sure why they weren't comfortable being themselves around me, but I figured if I wasn't particularly comfortable being myself around them, it was only fair. Anyway, my point being that after the snowball incident, they seemed more comfortable with being out in their house when I left my room. Edward played the piano more often and didn't stop if I came downstairs. The times I'd pass by what I assumed to be Esme's room—if the door was cracked open—I'd see her working on blueprints. When I went downstairs to the kitchen to get a glass of water or a snack sometimes I'd see Rosalie flipping through channels on their television, or doing something on the computer. I'd also sometimes see Emmett and Jasper playing that odd version of chess they'd come up with.
One of the times I went downstairs was when avoiding homework, so I watched them play over Emmett's shoulder… relatively speaking. I was standing behind Emmett, but stood far enough away that my smell wouldn't bother either of them, Jasper especially, but close enough I could watch. I didn't know the rules to the new game they'd created, but I was interested in seeing how it worked. I would've never thought of putting eight boards together.
At one point during the game Jasper was about to move a bishop, but I saw what he had planned to do and how that'd effect his game. Simply put: badly.
If I'd known Jasper was paying attention to me, because he hadn't been for the last four weeks, I wouldn't have made a face. As it was, he had been and I didn't know, so I made a face at his choice and his hand retracted as he thought of a better move. We both would've gotten off scot free had he not made the mistake of meeting my eyes (to this day, I would never figure out why he did). It was only for a millisecond but Emmett caught this. He spun around and I quickly turned too, bringing up my hand up to hide my face but disguising this action so it looked like I was playing with my hair.
I could feel his eyes on my back as I retreated to the stairs, a blush staining my cheeks. Oops. I would later find out that Jasper won that game. Emmett would never let me live that moment down (even if it was an honest mistake).
Throughout all this, another week passed without a word from Jasper. Apart from that small moment we'd had during his and Emmett's game, he continued to avoid me. It was starting to get really frustrating, but I wasn't quite sure what to say to him to get him to warm up to me again. I didn't even know how to initiate contact, because during Forensics would be hard. I couldn't afford it if things go too emotional and we had to start paying attention to Mr. Banner. Jasper was always out of the door after the bell rang before the other kids had started packing their things, and he avoided speaking with me around the house, too. I thought about approaching him during lunch, but people would talk if I randomly approached the Cullens' table without previous interaction with them.
Why did he have to be so stubborn? I knew he thought that he was protecting me by doing this, and maybe he was, but we couldn't simply talk? He didn't have to be extremely close to me and our conversations didn't have to last hours. The least he could do was acknowledge me during Forensics. Was it really that hard?
Meanwhile, because I'd been so focused on this Jasper problem (and trying to erase that dream from my mind), I hadn't noticed the Suites planning something. I'd usually catch these things days in advance, because I was always alert, always cautious, always wary, but this time I barely even caught it at all, which scared me tremendously.
Cynthia had started volunteering at Forks' public library a while back, because she liked getting out of the house during the weekends. Sometimes she'd hangout with the friends she'd made, thankfully in town, but when they weren't available or she didn't feel like it, she'd go to the library to help sort and shelve, among other things. I was against this when she brought it up the first time because I was so used to shadowing her to make sure that she was safe, that being across town from her for a few hours sent my stress levels skyrocketing.
Now that the Cullens seemed to be holding the Suits off just a bit more than usual, she'd gotten comfortable to this lifestyle, to this leisurely living much, much quicker than I. I mean, I'd argue that I still wasn't comfortable with it. It may have been better than living in a tent and safer, but we were surrounded by seven vampires almost constantly—sure they drank animal blood, but they were vampires nonetheless. And I couldn't forget about the Suits. Sooner or later the Volturi would get tired of waiting and make some kind of move. I wanted and needed to be ready and alert when that happened.
She tried the "never had a real teenage experience" but I was pretty set in opposing this that it didn't work on me this time. Besides, I'd agreed to stay with the Cullens and I'd agreed to take her on a shopping spree—don't even get me started on crowded malls and public places—but this I just couldn't agree on.
Or so I thought.
Obviously I caved and agreed to her wishes—don't ask me how, it just sort of happened—but I only allowed for her to go on weekends and to stay for two hours. I also drove her to and from, and unbeknownst to her, I stayed in town the whole two hours so that if something did happen, I'd be close by.
So there I was on a Saturday afternoon, strolling into the back rooms that only volunteers and employees were allowed to go to tell her I was here to pick her up and drive her back. It wasn't enough that I was constantly thinking about this situation with Jasper, but now I was getting myself worked up over Cynthia doing something normal. Not only that but what happened that afternoon reminded me of the night of the dance and how I'd let my guard down, I had become too comfortable, which really wasn't helping anything.
When I found her, however, she shooed me away because she wanted to finish what she was doing quickly, which was taking the plastic jacket covers off the actual jackets of books.
She promised she'd be quick so I reluctantly went to explore the adult fiction section to pass the time and it was when I was flipping through some pages of some random book that I liked the cover of that I had a vision of one of the librarians that worked here sneak up behind Cynthia, who was too focused on her task to notice, before plunging a small knife into her throat. Blood red flooded my vision before it faded and I was once again looking at black words on white pages of the book I was holding.
Okay, so a little later than I wanted it to be, but I hit somewhat of a writer's block. Good news, though, I have so many exciting ideas from brainstorming for this story (that I hope will be emotional and feels-worthy), that I should be able to adopt a posting schedule... maybe. And, as always, I hope you enjoyed!
Thank you for reading,
TheBrightestNight
