Loki galloped Eaglebeats back towards Kaia's barn at the fastest the mare could reach. His mind was turmoil of pain and memories, as well as reproaching thoughts about what he had done.

She'd seen.
She'd seen.

Him. His intimate thoughts.

And he'd let her.

It felt as if she had seen him stripped naked and laid bare on stone. It wasn't like Kaia had seen much; she had only seen the shape of Frigga, but she didn't understand what was behind it. She didn't understand how it would feel, to lose the only thing precious to her.

Mother. Frigga.

"So perceptive about everyone except yourself." He could hear her voice, hurt and exasperated, but also loving. The only love he had ever given himself over to wholly.

And now she was gone, torn from his grasp. And deep inside, he knew it was his fault. He had given the Kursed directions, told it to take the staircase that led up to the palace.

Loki had killed Frigga, and he would bear the pain forever like a stone placed between his shoulders. He could never be rid of it.

In a second, he felt himself die again. He was back in Svartalfheim, the Dark Elf weapon sucking the life out of him. His chest contracted and he was falling suddenly, through the air, tumbling onto the dust of the Dark World. Thor's scream ringing in his ears.

"Noooo!"

But it was Loki screaming as he slipped off of Eaglebeats' back and onto the gravelled path, landing with a jarring thud. He clawed at his chest again, trying to ease the feeling of death out of his body.

He was fine. He was alive.

He clenched his teeth and eased himself up on one elbow, trying to take deep breaths. Why did this happen? He had thought that the Dark Elf stone had caused it. But now there was no Dark Elf stone around…..what had happened?

Something nudged him and he looked up to see Eaglebeats bend her head over him, ears flattened back and eyes slightly panicked. Loki held his arm up and put it across her head. Eaglebeats straightened her neck, helping Loki up with the moment of her movement.

He breathed. "I'm fine. You're fine. Am I fine?" He muttered over and over. "I'm not fine. But alive." He breathed again, glad of the air.

The sound of hoof beats jolted him out of his stupor.

"You okay, Loki?"

He turned around to see Kaia, mounted on her black gelding, trot up beside Eaglebeats. The mare lifted her head and nickered loudly in greeting to her partner.

"What makes you think something as wrong?" Loki said defensively.

Kaia looked offended. "Nothing. I thought….never mind." She kicked her black Clydesdale into a canter. She leaned in the saddle as her horse took off.

Loki watched her go. She hadn't mentioned the events of earlier. He hoped she would keep it that way.

Eaglebeats lowered her head to eye level with him and gave him a glare.

Loki almost laughed, easing the tension in his chest. "What?"

The mare snorted and paced.

"I know, your partner left you and you want to go catch up. You hate being last, do you not?" Loki grabbed her reins and jumped into the saddle, which required quite a long leap. Eaglebeats started into action as soon as he was on her back, and Loki leaned lower in the saddle. "Go, Lady Eagle."

Eaglebeats cantered smoothly to Kaia's barn. She knew the way well, and so Loki had no need to steer her at all. She stopped in front of the barn and Loki dimounted quickly, sliding down her side and landing on the earth with a quiet thump.

He grabbed Eaglebeats' reins and led her into the barn, where Kaia had already taken Sleipnir's saddle and bridle off and had tied him in cross ties.

Loki led Eaglebeats up beside Sleipnir. He knew she wasn't going anywhere as long as she was beside her companion.
Loki then took her saddle and bridle off, and placed them in the storage place he had found while Kaia was gone to her work. He had decided to go exploring the barn, which had not resulted in much. But at least he knew where Kaia kept the saddles and bridles for her horses.

He placed them on their individual racks and almost turned around and said, "Groom my horse," until he remembered he was on earth. There were no servants or stablehands here. He would have to groom Eaglebeats himself.

Loki sighed. He wasn't looking forward to getting dirty again.


"I got it!" Kaia exclaimed to Loki, holding the typhoon spike between her two palms, aimed straight at Loki.

Loki almost exclaimed, "Really? Oh, that's great. I don't care!", but he held his tongue. Instead, he said, "Now try to send it outwards, away from you, and at me."

Kaia pinched her eyebrows in concentration, and the swirling horizontal spike of wind inched towards him slowly. It was good, much better than Loki himself could have done, but Loki never complimented Kaia. Kaia never asked for it. It was a mutual agreement.

He found the spike of the typhoon pointed an inch from his heart. He looked down with amusement. "Terrifying." A quick thought overrode Kaia's effort and transformed the typhoon into a cloud of green, slicing the spike to pieces.

"Dammit! Lost my hold." Kaia clenched her teeth in frustration. "You've got to stop that! I almost had it."

"Close. You've gotten better at controlling the wind." He gritted his teeth. No compliments. No mercy. Damn.

She nodded and went back to concentrating. She moved her hands into small circles, wind scurrying between her palms until it swirled into a horizontal spike again. "I think…don't stop me this time."

Loki crossed his arms over his chest. "Impress me."

She did. The spike elongated, moving outwards until it was a full weapon. Kaia brought her palms together. "Now to make them move outwards…." She hissed quietly and the spike shot forward suddenly.

Loki screamed in a very un-manly fashion and took off running, the meter-long drill of air pursuing him. He could hear Kaia laughing.

"Bloody Hel!" Loki flung his arms out and a barrier of green magic blew up in front of him, creating a shield. The spike hit the shield and evaporated.

Kaia was cackling maniacally. "There you go!" She wiped fake dust off her hoodie. "Don't get on my bad side next time."

Loki raised an eyebrow and released the magic he was using, causing the shield to disappear. "I do not plan on it."

Kaia rubbed her palms together. "Let me try again." She was panting, though, and Loki could see that she was hiding exhaustion behind her mask of sarcasm.

"I think we should end it here. You're close to fainting."

"No!" Kaia exclaimed. "I can totally whoop your ass again."

Loki turned around to her and began to walk towards the barn. "I'd like to see you try."

Behind him, Kaia laughed. "Okay, maybe I'm a bit tired."

Loki smiled smugly and headed towards the barn just as Jasper walked out, leading the white gelding on one lead line and Kaia's black draft on the other. Eaglebeats followed behind, reluctant to leave her herd. She was their queen and she had to watch over them.

"Jaz, you should take Spark out." Kaia called.

"I'm on it." Jasper answered, opening the gate to the field with one foot and leading the black gelding inside. Eaglebeats followed him in.

With the other hand, Jasper led his white gelding over to a small log and vaulted onto it's back, using his leadline as reins. "I'll be back in thirty."

Kaia nodded. "Sure. I've got some work to do."

Jasper kicked the gelding's sides and the horse took off.

Kaia walked over to the pasture fence and leaned both elbows on it, watching the two Clydesdales graze. She wasn't wearing her glasses, and her eyes were now purple.

Loki walked over and stood beside her, his back straight and hands clasped behind his back. Feeling the need to ease the awkward silence, he asked, "What's his name?"

"Who?" Kaia glanced up at him.

"The black gelding. You love that horse."

Kaia chuckled. "That's Sleipnir."

"Like the eight legged one?"

"That's the one. Speaking of which, didn't you give birth to the original Sleipnir? The one from the norse myths?"

Loki snorted. "Mortals. You get all your facts all wrong. Sleipnir is my father's steed."

"So you didn't fuck a horse?"

Loki hid his face in his hands. "No, no I did not."

He heard Kaia laughing. "It's okay, we all have problems."

Loki began to yell, "But I didn't- oh. You're making fun of me."

Kaia turned her face to him. Her eyes were green again. "So, Loki..." She began hesitantly. "What made you attack New York?"

Loki turned away from her, wanting to avoid her keen gaze. He wouldn't speak to her of his own problems.

Behind him, Kaia muttered, "Sorry." In a moment, Loki heard her leave and wondered if he had offended her in some way.

Not that he cared much, but she made him think so much of Frigga that he was pretty sure he had hurt her pride. His mother had always known when he was keeping secrets from her. She'd always been offended when he refused to tell her the truth. He could hear her now, right after Thor had brought him back from Midgard. He'd been brought into her chambers in chains, and she had been the only one kind to him.

Frigga had ordered the muzzle removed from his mouth so that he could speak. Then she had thrown her arms around him.
Only after a moment did she begin to question him about his actions and scold him.

"What happened to you? What possessed you, Loki!?"

Loki had remained silent, enduring his mother's affection because he had to.

"So, you do not trust your own mother?" Frigga had said after a moment.

Loki wanted to scream, "You're not my mother!" Instead, he lowered his gaze and muttered, "It's nothing. I really don't have anything to tell you."

Frigga clasped her hand behind her back. "My son, your father requires answers. If you won't give them to him, at least give them to me."

"Why should I trust you?" Loki had said bitterly.

"I raised you. I know you better than you know yourself, Loki. If there's anyone you can trust now, after all you've done, it's me."

"You lied to me all my life."

"I kept you safe."

"What good did that do me? What good did it do me, mother?!" He screamed bitterly, pushing her away and turning his back on her.

Frigga sounded both sad and shocked. "What happened to you?" She asked quietly.

Loki didn't answer her. He was seething in rage, and he did not want to look upon his mother's face because he knew she was crying.


And now she was dead and there was nothing Loki could do to apologize. His last words to her had been words of denial. The last time he had seen her, she'd been offended, but she'd still loved him.

She may have been the only person that ever loved him.

Something shoved itself into his face, a giant nose with velvety nostrils. Eaglebeats glared at him as if she could read his mind. She seemed to be saying, 'that's not entirely true."

Glancing around to make sure no one was watching him, Loki bent down and kissed the mare's velvety nose. "Yes, my Queen." He whispered.

Eaglebeats let him put his arms around her neck. She let him cry into her velvet coat, standing stoically as Loki let her see his emotions.

He had never cried twice in one day before. He had never showed this much feeling before to anyone, not even Frigga.

It felt good.


Oh man, that was fun. I've been cackling throughout the chapter. Poor Loki, eh?

-eaglenation, over and out.