AN: ... I got nothing. Except I really need to get started checking my email again |D

Discalimer: Stiiiill belong to K. Masashi...


Naruto was beyond tired when he woke up the next morning. It was a good kind of tired, but tired nonetheless. And in some respects, also a bad kind of tired since he was so hard, he was surprised his unconscious humping against Sasuke's ass hadn't woken the other up.

Rolling over and stretching, he let out a huge yawn before shaking his head and sitting up, running one hand through his hair and turning to look at Sasuke. The raven slept on, his back to Naruto, and the blond stood to head to the bathroom. Relieving himself, he brushed his teeth, then grabbed a random shirt left hanging on the back of his bathroom door, yanking it on and moving back into his room.

He figured he might as well let Sasuke sleep, it was only ten in the morning, and he knew for a fact he'd worn the other out the night before. Smirking at the thought, he grabbed his phone off the nightstand and moved towards the door.

He tried to think of what to make for breakfast, since they'd already gone the pancakes route, and still hadn't thought of anything by the time he reached the kitchen. Cereal was so boring, and they'd had bacon and eggs recently. Maybe they had some frozen waffles.

Digging through the freezer, he cursed when he realized Kiba had wolfed down the last of the Eggos before Sasuke had arrived across the street. Great. So not only was the bastard a cockblocker, he was also a food thief.

Speaking of Kiba, Naruto thought, glancing at the stairs and pulling out his phone. If he called the other sooner rather than later, he wouldn't have to listen to the retard bitch and moan about how he was being ignored all day.

Hitting the speed dial for his friend, he put the phone to his ear and continued digging through the freezer. Maybe Kiba had spared one lone Eggo for Sasuke to eat.

The line rang five times before it finally clicked. "Someone better be dying..."

"From the sounds of it, you," Naruto said with a grin. "Hey, did you eat all my Eggos?" The question was an afterthought, but while he had him on the phone, he figured he may as well ask.

The question got him hung up on. He snorted, hit speed dial again, and waited.

"Seriously, I will fucking kill you, fucknut. You didn't call me to ask me about your fucking Eggos."

"I didn't, actually, that was an afterthought." Naruto pouted slightly, pulling himself from the freezer and shivering. "What can I eat for breakfast aside from pancakes, Eggos and eggs?"

He heard a long pause, and realized Kiba was about to hang up on him again.

"I didn't call just for this! I'm asking just because I happen to have you on the phone."

"Dude, seriously? It's ten in the morning. Why are you even awake? What can I do to change that so that you let me go back to sleep?"

"Come on, work with me," Naruto sighed, switching the phone from his right ear to his left. "Breakfast food?"

"Fuck, I don't know, dude," Kiba said in a clearly exasperated tone. "Oatmeal?"

"Oh, oatmeal," Naruto repeated, nodding thoughtfully. "I like it. I like it. Give me something else."

Another pause.

"Dude, I am going to fucking hang up on you. Good bye."

"No, no, no, no, no! Wait! Okay, I'm sorry! How are you?"

"... Sleeping!"

"You always call me at inopportune times, dude," Naruto insisted, sticking his head in the fridge, now. "It's my turn. Speaking of inopportune times, you fucking suck. You're cockblocking me, man."

A longer pause, but this time, Naruto knew it wasn't the 'right before a hang up' kind.

"Coc—what? I'm not even there! How is that even physically possible?" Kiba sounded as adorably confused as Naruto was sure he looked. Oh Kiba. Poor, naive Kiba.

"Because!" Naruto huffed, getting annoyed just remembering the previous day. "I didn't fuck Sasuke because of you."

Naruto was willing to bet his allowance for the year that Kiba had just choked on his own saliva.

"Dude, you're going crazy!" the Inuzuka insisted, still coughing slightly. "The batshit kind. What the fuck do I have to do with you and your boyfriend fucking?"

"Uh, you're the one who said if I fuck him, you meet him." Naruto opened some tuppaware to sniff what was inside and hastily shut it, making a face and putting it back in the fridge. "So I got cockblocked."

"Uh, then let me meet him? And stop thinking about me while you're having sex, dude, that's fuckin' gross."

"I can't help it," Naruto teased with a grin. "Just thinking of your smooth, caramel-coloured flesh and—he hung up again." Naruto snickered, pulling the phone away from his ear and shaking his head. Kiba was too much fun to fuck with. He could just imagine the horror on the other's face when he made out with Sasuke in front of him, maybe even adding in some dirty talk and—

The blond cut his thought off midway, staring at the floor and wincing. Right, it was so easy to just imagine everything working out, but having it actually work out was another matter entirely.

Flipping his phone between his hands, he winced again and then pulled it open, dialling a familiar number and putting it back to his ear. It rang three times before the line clicked, the tail-end of laughter clearly audible.

"Good morning. You're up early," his father said jovially, clearly having a good time with his wife and new friends.

"Hey dad. Um, can you talk?"

"Naruto, is everything okay?"

The blond smiled a little, sitting at the kitchen table. His father's voice was immediately laced with concern, and that was why he loved talking to him about things like this. Well, mostly his dad was the only voice of reason he had in his life—was that so surprising considering his mother and best friend?—so when things happened, he really needed him.

"Yeah, everything's okay, I'm just... Thinking, I guess."

"Everything okay with Sasuke?"

"It's fine, yeah," he reassured him. "He's sleeping. So was Kiba until I—called him to ask where my Eggos went."

"Your mother ate them."

Aw, and here he'd accused his best friend of being an Eggo thief when it was his mother all along. He'd have to apologize to Kiba later.

"Good to know," he said with a smile.

"I'm assuming you didn't call me to tell me Sasuke and Kiba were both sleeping, though."

"Well, I don't know, I mean, I called Kiba to ask if he finished off my Eggos." Naruto chuckled.

"Yes, but I like to think I know you better. What's on your mind?"

Looking down at the table, he sighed and started drawing random patterns with his forefinger, focussing on the feel of the wood beneath his skin.

"I don't like doing this," he admitted in a low voice. "I don't like lying to them. Keeping things from them. Kiba's my best friend, but dad, you gotta know how this'll turn out. He won't get it. And Sasuke—he doesn't know me well enough to not get mad and try and work it out."

He heard his father sigh on the other end, and could picture him rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand. "Well, son, like I said before, I don't think you're giving them enough credit. Now I can't speak for Sasuke, but I've known Kiba as long as you have, and I don't think something like this is going to destroy decades of friendship. Besides," he heard a teasing tone enter his father's voice, "we both know Kiba wouldn't be able to make any other friends."

Naruto laughed, shaking his head, but silently agreeing. It was true. He loved Kiba, he really did, but he knew he was the only one patient enough to put up with the guy.

The laughter slowly died down, and he was back to thinking what he had been before calling his father.

"I don't know what to do," he finally said in a low voice, staring down at the table.

"Well, you're gonna have to tell them eventually."

Yeah, he knew that, but it didn't mean he had to like it. Lose his best friend, lose his boyfriend, or lose both. Some choices.

"I know," he finally said. "But—eventually isn't now."

"Eventually isn't never, either." Trust his dad to bring him back to reality.

"Right." He sighed. "I should let you get back. How's your game?"

"Your mother's kicking my ass."

"Only because she's had more practice hitting things," Naruto replied with a laugh. "Don't tell her I said that."

"Can't promise that," his father replied, clearly grinning. "We'll see you tonight."

"Yeah. Bye, dad."

"Be good."

"Dad," Naruto whined, shaking his head. "Bye!" He hung up before his father had any other ridiculous hopes for him.

Rolling his eyes, he let his forehead rest lightly against the table and took a deep breath. Whenever he thought too much, he always liked to do some kind of physical activity, which usually included sit-ups, push-ups, and beating the crap out of his punching bag.

Since Sasuke was still sleeping, he figured he'd do the next best thing so, standing, he shoved his phone into the pocket of his sweats and grabbed his jacket from the front hall. He knew he was probably going to be cold until he really got going with the shovelling, but he could handle it.

Getting his boots on, he moved out onto the front porch and grabbed the shovel off the side of the house before moving towards the driveway.

As much as Sasuke seemed to hate it, Naruto felt it was kind of therapeutic. He didn't have to do anything when he shovelled. Pick up snow, dump out, repeat. It was easy to think things over in his head, or just kind of get into a zombie-like trance where his only goal in life was to clear the walkway of snow—if only to get to dead body parts beneath it. Because clearly, that was all zombies wanted. They didn't shovel snow for nothing!

He was almost done his driveway when the door across the street opened and Itachi stepped out with a cup of coffee in one hand, and a book in the other. Breathing hard due to his attempted speed, Naruto straightened, pain twinging his lower back, and offered the other a head nod in greeting.

"Good morning," Itachi replied easily, stepping out into the snow. The boots he had on over his black sweat pants barely reached high enough to stop the white powder from hitting the rim.

"Morning."

"Where's that incompetent brother of mine?"

Snorting, Naruto motioned the house, flicking sweat-soaked hair from his eyes. "Sleeping."

"Hm. Figures. Hopefully he'll have breakfast waiting for you, like a good housewife."

Naruto laughed, shaking his head. "What happened to me being his pet?"

"You reminded me one too many times that you're not." Itachi shrugged almost imperceptibly, and took a sip of his coffee. "Would you like to do my walk next? My parents will want a clean driveway when they get home, and Lord knows I won't do it."

Grinning, the blond dug the shovel into the ground and leaned his free arm against it, shaking his head at Itachi. "Now why, pray tell, would I do a favour for you?"

Itachi eyed him for a few seconds, then a smirk twitched up the corners of his mouth. "Careful, Uzumaki. You never know when you might need a favour from me."

The way he said it wasn't threatening, but the first thing Naruto thought of was Itachi looking out the window at him when Kiba had left his house the other day. And watching the older Uchiha sip his coffee with a knowing look before disappearing back into the house...

Lets just say Naruto didn't want to get stuck not being owed any favours.

So five minutes later, with his own driveway done, he trudged across the street to clear off the Uchiha's, half-wondering if Sasuke was being a lazy ass and just pretending to sleep while actually watching him from the window.


Surprisingly, when Naruto was finished and back in the house, he went to his room to find Sasuke still sleeping, even though it was well past noon. Bringing one hand to his stomach when it growled, he sighed and walked into the room, falling down on the bed beside Sasuke.

The action caused the other to wake with a start, tired onyx eyes turning to look at him, annoyed, before closing again and snuggling into the pillow. Naruto was sure Sasuke would deny the snuggling, but really, that was the only way to describe the other's face pushing itself into the fluffy mound.

"Mm, you stink," Sasuke breathed sleepily, then inhaled deeply. Naruto chuckled.

"I just cleared off two driveways, of course I stink."

"Two?" One eye peeked open to regard him. "Mine?"

"No, Tinker Bell's." He leaned forward to kiss Sasuke's forehead. "Of course yours."

"Could have waited for me."

Naruto smiled. Even though he knew Sasuke was saying it mostly to be polite, it still felt nice to hear. Proved that he wasn't just hired help in the other's eyes. "Nah. Your brother owes me, now."

"Mm. Good thing to have, a favour from Itachi," Sasuke agreed, inhaling deeply again. "Wish I had one."

"You could always shovel the walk for him," Naruto offered with a grin, cocking his head and staring at the other. He looked really good in the bright light shining through his window.

"Not how it works." Rolling onto his back, Sasuke stretched, opening his eyes again and rubbing his bare chest. "What time is it?"

"Late-ish, I guess." A feral grin spread across the blond's face. "Must have worn you out something fierce last night."

Sasuke snorted. "Don't flatter yourself." With a grunt, he stood, rubbing the back of his head, and clearly ignoring Naruto's snickers.

His hair had deflated in the night, and it looked funny all smooshed down how it was. Naruto could laugh, but he certainly wasn't going to risk saying anything. He wanted to get laid—eventually. When his cockblocking ass of a best friend let him get fucking laid.

"You eat?"

Sasuke's question snapped him out of his angry musings about Kiba, and he shook his head, standing again and stretching.

"Nah, I was waiting on you. And I didn't know what to make. My mom's an Eggo thief, so I was out of breakfast ideas."

"There's always oatmeal."

Huh, that's exactly what Kiba said... Naruto couldn't help but note the small similarity. It was tiny, and pretty much insignificant, but anything was something, in Naruto's mind.

"I don't have any," he finally said, Sasuke disappearing into the bathroom. "But I was thinking we could go out and get, I don't know, pizza or sushi or something."

"How did you go from pizza to sushi?" Sasuke appeared in the doorway, looking amused.

Naruto pouted internally and crossed his arms. "Well, maybe I wanted sushi-covered pizza, you don't know, do you?"

"I suppose not, though that sounds ridiculously disgusting."

"Said the man who wouldn't try peanut butter on pancakes!"

Sasuke smirked at him. "Says the man who insisted rice was being ruined when I started frying it."

Naruto opened his mouth to answer, then snapped it shut. "Touché."

The Uchiha gave him a knowing look, then disappeared back into the bathroom, which Naruto took as his cue to head downstairs to find them something to eat, since sushi-covered pizza wasn't an option Sasuke seemed too keen on. Too bad, Naruto would've liked to try it.

The only thing he could find ready-made were frozen burritos in the freezer, but he honestly wasn't sure how long they'd been there, so he didn't think they should be eating them. Best to test things that might have freezer burn on his mother, first.

"What are you looking for?"

He turned when Sasuke entered the kitchen, wearing—sadly—more clothing than he had been the last time he'd seen him, and his hair back in its usual duck-butt style.

"Edible food," the blond replied, looking helplessly at the fridge. "Anything at your place we could steal?"

"Probably." Sasuke turned to look out the front window and smirked. "Good thing you shovelled both the walks, otherwise I'd have sent my pet out to get the food."

"I thought we'd agreed you were the pet," Naruto retorted with a playful grin.

"You agreed. I just let you think I did to keep you in your place."

"Ouch, touché again. You're on a roll this morning."

Moving across the kitchen, he pressed his lips to Sasuke's briefly, then took his hand and tugged him towards the door so they could go over to his place, and hopefully find more food. Shoving his feet into his boots, he pulled open the door and danced on the spot for a few seconds when the cold air hit him, waiting on Sasuke. The two of them darted across the street and into the safety of the other house's warmth, Naruto stamping his feet on the welcome mat inside the front entrance before removing his boots.

Itachi came down the stairs while they were still taking off their shoes, obviously to make sure he wasn't being robbed. He cocked an eyebrow at them, and Naruto just grinned.

"We're here to steal your food."

"By all means, there isn't much." Turning, he headed back up the stairs, Sasuke pushing past Naruto to lead the way to the kitchen, as if the blond didn't already know where it was.

Following along, he let Sasuke start looking through the cupboards while he moved to the fridge, pulling it open and sticking his head inside to find something edible. Where was his dad when he needed him?

Oh right. Golfing.

Letting out an annoyed huff, he closed the fridge and opened the freezer, perking up slightly before pulling out the sealed bag of hot dogs. Turning around, he held them up so Sasuke could see, and the raven shrugged.

"I think I saw some buns," he informed the blond, turning back around to rummage through a cupboard. Naruto grinned lecherously.

"I've got me some buns, for sure."

Sasuke turned to glare at him over his shoulder, then threw a bag of hot dog buns at him, the blond catching them.

"Score. I've got some ketchup and cheese whiz at my place." He started back for the door, but Sasuke grabbed his arm to stop him.

"Did you really just say cheese whiz?"

"Uh, yes?"

Sighing, the raven shook his head. "Peanut butter on pancakes. Cheese whiz on hot dogs. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"You love what's wrong with me," Naruto said with a grin, leaning forward to press his lips to the other's again. This time, he lingered, sucking on Sasuke's bottom lip for a few seconds before kissing him again.

When he started to pull away, Sasuke's hand shot up and tangled in his hair, pulling him forward again. Grinning internally, Naruto let his tongue lazily explore the other's mouth for a few seconds before pulling away again, this time being allowed to.

Smiling and letting the tip of his nose bump the tip of Sasuke's, he took a step back and started for the door again, the Uchiha following behind him.

They got their boots on and hurried back across the street to make their meal. Sasuke apparently didn't trust Naruto enough to let him boil the water for the meat, so the blond got to sit on the counter and watch his 'woman' work.

And he reminded Sasuke of that fact.

Every twenty seconds.

"If you don't stop calling me your woman, Naruto, I'm going to turn you into one."

"What do you mean?" The blond cocked his head to one side, frowning.

Sasuke just stared at him, and Naruto's face fell when it set in.

"I'm not too worried," he insisted, though the way he unconsciously covered his crotch suggested otherwise. "After all, you'd miss it too much."

"Wouldn't know, you haven't fucked me with it yet."

Naruto sighed. "Stop one-upping me, Sasuke. It makes me feel stupid."

Never mind that he actually was, but the Uchiha didn't need to know that...


"You know what's weird?" Sasuke inquired while he and Naruto walked across the street back to the Uchiha's house.

"What's that?" the blond asked, hands shoved in his pockets and all the muscles in his back tense from the cold. He stopped at the end of the Uchiha's driveway, Sasuke turning to look at him.

"All that alone time, and not once did we do anything dirty anywhere inappropriate." He eyed Naruto suspiciously. "You just like fucking me over in my own house, don't you?"

A grin slid onto the blond's face. "You caught me. The only people I want catching us being dirty are your parents." He leaned forward to kiss Sasuke, but the raven snorted and shoved him back with a hand in his face.

"Good night, dumbass."

"No good night kiss?" Naruto pouted, ignoring the phone vibrating in his pocket.

"No, you're still on probation for yesterday." Sasuke walked backwards, shoving his own hands in his pockets. "You better make it up to me."

"I will," the blond promised, hand tightening around his ringing phone. "Promise."

"Hn."

Turning, Sasuke waved over his shoulder once before disappearing into the house. Naruto turned towards his own home, pulling his still vibrating phone out. Kiba had been calling him repeatedly for the past two minutes. It was why Naruto had finally decided it was time to say good night to Sasuke. His parents returning right before the calls started had certainly helped.

"Christ, what?" he bellowed into the phone, stomping back across the street angrily, his footsteps muffled by the snow.

"Fina-fucking-lly! Dude, what if I was dying? What if I was on my God damn death bed and you wouldn't answer the phone?"

"You're obviously not close enough to death for my taste," Naruto snapped, slamming the front door behind himself loud enough for his mother to let out a shout of shock. She walked out of the kitchen and he shrugged an apology at her.

"Thanks, fucknut. Good to know our friendship is so important to you. Maybe I should rescind my Christmas present for you."

"You already got me a Christmas present," he reminded him, moving up to his room and sighing, rubbing the back of his neck. It had been a long two weeks. His patience and nerves were both wearing thin.

"Yeah, well, this one is both for you and for me. Guess who's in fucking Paris right now?"

"I don't feel like playing this game, Kiba," the blond sighed, sitting on his bed, then falling backwards, staring up at his ceiling.

"Fine, stick in the mud. All That Remains is in fuckin' Paris!"

Naruto jerked into a sitting position, hand gripping the phone so hard it almost hurt and eyes wide. "Fuck off!" He stood up. "Oh my God, are you serious?"

"Yeah, dude! And guess whose mother is the most amazing mother in the whole wide fuckin' world and got her baby boy some tickets for him and his best mother fuckin' friend—who doesn't ever answer his phone anymore?"

"Fuck off!" Naruto shouted, a grin so huge on his face it almost hurt. "Shit! Are you serious?"

"Yeah, man! We're fuckin' going to a concert tomorrow! Hidan's gonna come and get you around noonish, so make sure you're packed and shit, okay? The concert's gonna end late, so momma wants you to stay here for the night. We'll have you back to your girlfriend by morning, promise."

"Fuck me." The blond covered his mouth, still grinning.

"No thanks, but good to know you haven't changed too much," Kiba teased, then chuckled a little. "So I take it you're in?"

"Hells to the yeah I'm in!" Naruto let out a whoop and punched the air. "I'll see you tomorrow when I get there. And tell your mom she's an angel."

"Yeah—not going that far. I'll tell her you say thanks though."

"Sweet. Later, dude."

"Mm hm. You owe me for ignoring me, retard."

The line went dead.

Naruto grinned like a fucking idiot.