Special thanks to T-girl for submitting this question. I hadn't ever thought about it, and it took a lot of concentration to make sure I kept everyone in character here. So enjoy the story.


Question: What would happen if Beast Boy and Starfire kissed, and Robin found out?

One kiss. That was all it was. The touching of two people's lips. The passing of germs. The physical contact of mouths. But the problem wasn't that one kiss had happened. The problem was that the kiss shouldn't have happened between these two particular Titans..

"But Robin, it was just a kiss!" Beast Boy exclaimed dramatically, throwing himself at the ground in front of Robin. Starfire watched the scene, holding her fingers against her tingling lips.

"You kissed Starfire!" Robin shouted, pointing an accusing finger at the scrawny green boy, who was looking up at him innocently.

"Why is that a bad thing?"

"Well because-" Robin stopped abruptly, crossing his arms over his chest. Why was it a bad thing that Beast Boy had kissed Starfire? Why was he yelling at Beast Boy for kissing her, when she had probably kissed him back? Starfire wasn't his property, after all. He didn't own her. But maybe that was what upset him.

Beast Boy had done the one thing Robin had always been too afraid to do.

"Because you're heroes! And as long as you're part of the Titans, there will be no... Physical romance." Robin said, becoming a parental figure suddenly. If he couldn't stop them from kissing because of his own selfish desires, then perhaps pulling the hero card would work. After all, he was the leader.

"But Robin, you do not understand" Starfire started, but Robin sent her a look that silenced her. Beast Boy watched helplessly, cowering in front of Robin still. It occurred to him that maybe he should explain himself to the Boy Wonder. After all, he enjoyed, uh, living. And having a home to live in for that matter. But he knew that it would be useless. Robin had made up his mind.

"Understand what, Starfire? That you kissed Beast Boy."

"Yes, but it was for-"

"No. It was for nothing. I can't believe you'd actually pull something like this."

"Pull something like what?" Starfire asked suddenly, narrowing her eyes in anger. Beast Boy stood up slowly, realizing that if he didn't stop their fight soon, someone could get hurt.

"Guys, calm down. This really isn't that big of-"

"Kissing Beast Boy, Starfire. It's completely irresponsible!" Robin shouted, waving his arms around. Beast Boy closed his mouth.

"No, Robin. What is irresponsible is that you did not ask for an explanation. You judged us." Starfire pointed out.

"I didn't judge you, Starfire. I saw you two kissing!" Robin retorted, and Starfire opened her mouth to protest, closing it again when she realized that there was no use. She stormed out of the room, leaving Beast Boy behind to stare at Robin.

"What?"

"You really do have a thick skull."

"What do you mean?"

"Dude, she was trying to explain to you why we were kissing."

"I'm pretty sure I understand why people kiss. I understand why you'd be physically attracted to-"

"Robin, I'm not attracted to Star like that! We were kissing because this wild idea popped into my head that since Tamaraneans transfer knowledge through lip contact, that her English would be better if she kissed another boy."

"She was doing this to learn English better?" Robin asked, astonished.

"Yeah. But she didn't want you to find out. Because she knew you would overreact like this. Because she wanted you to think that you were the only boy she'd ever kissed." Beast Boy explained, stepping towards Robin. The taller boy backed out of his room, holding his hands up as a peace offering, but Beast Boy held his hand over the button that closed his door.

"Beast Boy, I'm sorry."

Beast Boy let out a soft chuckle, shaking his head, "Robin. I'm not the one you need to apologize to."