A.N.: I swear, I will be better. I am determined to get back on the wagon with writing, and here, my darlings, is a BTL update for your patience. This story still has such a hold over me, and I found THE song for the second arc of it. :) I'll tell you when the time is right. Meanwhile, I do hope you enjoy.

Suggested listening: Just a Little Bit, Maria Mena; Rise, Eddie Vedder; Slow Me Down, Emmy Rossum; Untitled, Jericho; Shape of My Heart, Sting; It's for the Best, Straylight Run; Seasons of Love, Rent; Come and Find Me, Josh Ritter; Your Ex-Lover is Dead, Stars

Chapter 8 - Just a Little Bit


One year later...

Holy shit. Noah looked down at the envelope in his hands, blowing out a breath as he flipped the New York University logo away from him. You know this is 50/50 at best. Tearing it open, he unfolded the thick paper. "Dear Mr. Puckerman, after careful review of your portfolio we - " Fuck. "We regret to inform you...unable to offer you a seat...great potential...please audition again..." He walked into the kitchen and tossed it on the table, shaking his head. "I didn't make it."

Ilana and the Gleeks let out a collective sigh, Will Schuester crossing the room to clap him on the shoulder. "Sorry, Puck."

He shrugged, smiling at the assemblage. Yeah, me too. Shit. "Whatever, it's cool. Who puts together a portfolio for NYU in six months? You guys have been amazing, but I should've learned from all the shi-" Your mom, dumbass. "Well, you can't rush it when it matters. And they said to try again. I don't think they'd put that in everyone's letter, right?"

"I doubt it," Mr. Schue offered. "Composers and musicians are notoriously obsessive. You put something like that in a letter, you're guaranteed to have people try again." Squeezing his shoulder, Will smiled. "And either way? You keep writing and we'll do this again next year."

"Thanks, guys." Just wish it fucking got me somewhere...Noah raised an eyebrow. "Does this mean I still get the free tutoring? 'Cause it's really helping, I do still wanna graduate with some degree, just in case." If I can't get there for school, I'll get there for work. But I'll get there.

Ilana bit her lip and looked around the room. "Guys, I will pay you if he wants the tutoring. This actual interest in doing well...it's amazing - please, let's keep the momentum, huh?"

The room echoed with laughter.

"Yeah, thanks, Ma. Anyway, thanks and get the fu - I'll see you guys later." Noah turned an innocent gaze on his mother. "What?" Come on, I can't curse after this?

Ilana ushered the herd to the door, rolling her eyes at him over her shoulder. "I know for a fact you can correctly express yourself in proper English, Noah, I'd appreciate it if you try to do it."

"You're the representative case for underachievement, its Patient Zero, if you will."

He forced a smile. "Will do, Ma." And while I'm thinking of it..."I should call Will, right?"

"It's up to you, sweetheart. Does he know you got the letter today?"

Dropping into a seat at the table, he shook his head. "He knows I was trying to transfer to a music composition program. I didn't tell him where." And I definitely won't now. Damn it.

"Well, doesn't hurt either way, then." Ilana shrugged. "Rachel wouldn't have any expectations."

"I hope you realize the wonderful person I've always seen inside you is the real you."

She never expected anything out of me except for me to live up to my potential...Noah shook his head with a half-smile. "No. Rach has no clue." And what if she did? No guarantee she'd want anything to do with you, Puckerman..."I didn't even want him to tell her what I decided on as a major. Seems almost cruel." Especially when she was right about everything...

"Cruel?" Ilana raised a brow. "That's a strong word to use."

A snort of laughter escaped him. "Yeah, and I think it's the right one." It's still a fucking understatement. He met her gaze. "Considering Rach told me when I graduated that I could be somebody, that I write beautiful music..."

"Oh, Noah..." Ilana squeezed his hand. "I see why you wouldn't want her knowing. How is she, anyway?"

Noah sighed heavily. Good fucking question. "Will says she's fine. She's throwing herself into every performing group, recital, master class - everything."

His mother tilted her head questioningly. "And how do you think she's doing?"

"It's typical Rachel Berry. When in doubt, sing." That was her solution for everything...He shrugged. "She could be anywhere from totally fine to on the verge of a nervous breakdown." Everything but this. And what does that tell you, Puckerman?

She frowned. "I get the feeling you think the latter?"

"Well, yeah. She - we -" He took a breath. May as well, you know it's the fucking truth. "I was cruel, Ma. I didn't mean to be, I thought I was saving her from herself. I didn't think she really - I didn't believe she loved me. Not like that." I wish I fucking had...

Dropping a kiss on his head, Ilana rested her cheek on it briefly. "Sweetheart, I am so, so sorry I didn't give you the support and love you deserved. I was a horrible mother. Maybe I should call and apologize too..."

Noah let out a pained laugh. "I think you're fine, Ma. Whatever happened, it was still me." My stupidity, my fucking insecurity..."It was what I said, what I did. I knew what I was doing, I just...whatever. Lima loser." And I let the one person who believed in me go. Fuck that. I drove her away.

Ilana grabbed her son by the chin. "Noah. Don't you dare say that. You know it's not true."

He sighed. "Yeah, I know." Now. "I just - I was hoping to get there. To be there." With her.

She sat back down. "I knew it. You put on a good show for your friends."

Rachel would've known...He ran a hand over his head, her words rising through his memory again.

Her eyes sparkling in the summer sun. "I see you better than you might think, Noah Puckerman." Smile playing on her lips as she splashed him. "I know you better than you suspect."

"Noah? Where did you go?" Concern was etched in his mother's furrowed brow.

To when it was still good. "Sorry, Ma. Yeah, I can put on a good face when I have to."

"Thanks, Berry." Walking away, fighting down bile with every step.

I didn't want to walk away, Rachel, I swear..."I really wanted this to work. I wanted to get to New York City so badly." I thought I was doing right by you.

"Do they know?" She gestured at the door. "The - what do you call them? Gleeks?"

My friends. He cracked a genuine smile. "Yeah, Ma. And they don't know. Just Quinn."

"Your ex. You don't do things the easy way, do you?"

"That's what sets Rachel apart from all of us. She only knows how to stick with the hard stuff." Her friend shaking her head, shared knowledge between them.

"Guess not," he murmured. "Must've picked that up somewhere."


"And then Saturday I'm going to be performing at the Next Generation Center with the select ensemble before work." Rachel leaned her head on Will's shoulder. "This performance schedule is grueling." And rewarding. And all-consuming.

"Well, who signed on for it?" He kissed her temple. "You can slow down whenever you want, Rachel, you know that. And you know what I think."

Yes, I know, I know. "Daddy, I'm not running. I'm...developing. Blossoming. An important period of growth and maturation for any aspiring artist. By exposing myself to the myriad opportunities to be had in such an eclectic city, I am broadening my frame of reference, developing as a performer. It's a crucial period of time - I am a sponge, Daddy, and it's my responsibility to fully avail myself of the benefits of that openness, the very gestalt of the enduring and beloved star I could be -"

"Sweetheart, relax. I'm not going to lecture you. I trust you'll slow down when you're ready. Or, unfortunately, you'll get a slap in the face. I'd really rather the former than the latter, baby girl, but it's going to happen." Will squeezed her closer. "And I'm here either way. But how about you give yourself a break tonight, hmm? Get in your pajamas, pick out a movie..."

"I was planning to go to a night of scenes Lori's been working at, it's a workshop, but there could be a worthy monologue or an independent study that has future potential." She gnawed on her lower lip. "I really don't think I should miss it." I cannot miss any opportunity to further my art. That is unacceptable. Plus I don't need to spend all night justifying myself and my schedule.

"Rachel, it's July. There is no class. You don't have any lessons tonight. You made Dean's List. You have a full-time job giving lessons, you're still working at the Prom. I think you have enough in your repertoire for a while." He leaned around to meet her gaze. "Take a night off."

This is off - I'm not the one performing. Rachel took a deep breath. "I just don't -" She stopped speaking as Prelude/Angry Young Man sounded from her father's pocket. Absolutely not. "I think I'll go to the workshop, Daddy."

Will closed his eyes, shaking his head. "His timing is always impeccable." He withdrew his cell, sighing at the display. "You know I don't have to take this, baby girl, I won't if -"

Rachel stood and held her hand out to stop him. "Daddy, please. Take the call. You haven't heard from him that much this year. If he's calling, it must be something." And in another universe, he'd share it with me...She forced a smile. "Tell him hello." Turning quickly, she grabbed her keys and purse. I must get to the show. And away from here. Rachel closed the door behind her as she left.


Will flipped the phone open, swinging his legs onto the couch. "Hello, Noah."

"Hi, Mr. Berry." Noah licked his lips. Here goes. "I hope I'm not disturbing you, I just wanted to update you, since I haven't really been in touch."

Will looked at the closed door. "No, son, you're not. Though I'm hoping the fact I haven't been hearing from you means things have improved for you in Lima? With your mother and such?"

"Yeah, Ma and I are doing good. Especially since I figured out the whole rest of my life thing," he deadpanned. Just wish I did this sooner.

"That's right! The transfer applications. Did you hear back?"

Puck glared at the letter on the table. Fucking shit. "I, um...I didn't make it into the program I wanted." And the rest don't even fucking count.

"Damn it, I'm sorry, Noah. I know how hard you were working to get your grades up. Which program? What did they say?" Will gazed hopefully at the ceiling.

I'm not saying anything about New York until I can fucking get there. "The letter told me to audition again after developing my portfolio, and I'm gonna. I figured it was a long shot to make it in after six months of work when people have been working on it for years." Or their whole lives, like Rachel..."So, next April I'll try again." And again until I either get in, or graduate and get a job in New York City.

"Do you think it makes a difference if you audition in person? I know you said you sent in a video audition." Will shook his head, sighing softly.

"It's actually on YouTube, that's how they want it. And there were a bunch who auditioned that way - apparently the actual audition slots fill up really fast. I - I can email you the link if you want, I, um, I don't mind. I mean - you don't - whatever, it's -" Noah slapped himself in the forehead. Lay off, Puckerman…

Raising a brow, Will replied, "If you'd like. Wberrypsych, all one word. I'm on Gmail. And actually, feel free to email me too. I check it regularly, I can respond to you easily if I'm in between clients."

"Thanks, Mr. Berry. I will. How -" He rubbed his hand over his mouth. Fuck it. "How's Rachel?"

Heaving a sigh, Will pressed his hand to his eyes. "Rachel is Rachel, Noah, she's dealing with things the best way she knows how."


Rachel shook her head and stood as the stagehands set the next scene. This is atrocious. I simply cannot stay. Biting her lip, she threaded through the row, murmuring apologies. I should've just stayed home, Daddy was right. Opening the doors, she snuck into the lobby, sighing. "Good thing this was free," she muttered.

"You get what you pay for," a familiar voice answered behind her.

"Lori!" Rachel spun around, pressing a hand to her heart. Damn it, I'd have to run into you?

"I thought I saw you in the audience - why the hell are you at a night of scenes I told you was going to suck?" Lori crossed her arms and arched a brow.


"You mean keeping herself busy every fucking minute so she's not alone with her thoughts." Puck pulled the cell away from his ear to hit himself in the forehead. Damn it. I should've known. "I'm such a fuck-up."

"Noah, stop it. There's nothing to be gained from that. Rachel will deal with things eventually." Will rubbed his eyes. "She's just reeling still. Her senior year was an emotional roller coaster, so freshman year was another animal. And she even says hello."

"Rachel?" He sat up straighter. She says hello? "Is she - is she there? Does she want to -"

"No, Noah, she heard your ring tone. She's at a night of scenes with Lori." Will pinched the bridge of his nose. "She's been on vacation since May and hasn't slowed down at all."


"I was just – " Rachel paused. Get it together, Rachel. "I wanted to see if there was anything redeeming, to try to strategize how I would approach such poor material." That sounded semi-plausible, right?

Lori rolled her eyes. "Uh, yeah, sure. It's worth sitting in a sweltering auditorium - and oh, I do remember telling you that too - just to think about something you'd never allow in your career? Uh-huh."

She drew herself up. Apparently not. "Well, I - it seemed -"

"Lor? What are -" Connor broke off, looking at Rachel. "Oh. Oh, sorry. Hey, Rachel, didn't realize you were here. You look well."

"Thanks, Connor, hello. I -" She looked from Connor to Lori and back again. Oh, Rachel. "Oh, no," she groaned. This cannot be happening. "I ruined a date."


"She's gonna burn out." Puck swore, standing and pacing the kitchen. Fuck, Rachel, you know better than this.

"I've warned her, believe me." Will looked over as the door opened, his husband walking in. "She won't listen to me or to her dad." Will held a hand out for Dan.

"Noah?" he mouthed.

Will nodded as Dan curled up next to him. "Rachel is going to do what she wants. We just have to be here to catch her. I told her that right before she walked out the door."

"Is there anything I could do?" He rolled his eyes. Yeah fucking right, Puckerman. You've done enough.


"You didn't ruin anything, Rachel, relax." Connor raised a brow, looking from one to the other. "Everything okay?"

Lori rolled her eyes. "Yeah, everything's fine. Rachel just needs to stop being such an overachiever. Tell Sam I'll be back inside in a minute."

"Wait - you weren't -" Rachel closed her eyes, biting back a whimper. It just gets better, doesn't it. "If you wouldn't mind, I'd like to wait for the ground to swallow me whole, please? Thanks."

Lori chuckled. "It's okay, Rach, chill. Sam actually just lost points for not being the one to follow me. And don't even talk to me about your sick plan to hook me up with your ex. I, um...I think it might happen anyway. So just keep your nose out of it. And for real - what're you doing here? Did the dads put a sock up on the door or something? Which, kind of - eww." She shuddered. "I will never conjure such a mental image again. No offense."


Will closed his eyes. "Noah, no offense, while I appreciate the sentiment, I don't see how you could help. If there seems to be something you can remedy, I'll let you know. Just stay on track, all right? Don't let this rejection shake you. If this is what you want to do, take a page from Rachel's book and stick with it."

"I will, Mr. Berry. I'll email that link for you if you want to hear. I..." Do I - Should I tell him I - He swallowed and shrugged at the empty room. "I kind of wrote the one called Untitled for her."

Will raised a brow. "I'll definitely check it out, Noah." He whispered in Dan's ear. "He wrote her a song."

"He wrote her a - what is this, a John Hughes movie? Tell him to email it tonight!" Dan snuggled in to listen on the other side of the phone.

"Send it over tonight if you'd like." Will glared at his husband, rolling his eyes. "And seriously, don't lose faith. Be in touch if you need to, and our best to Ilana."

"Thanks, Mr. Berry. I'll pass that along. And, uh..." He cleared his throat. She said hello, she knew it was me. "Tell Rachel I said hi, and that I hope she has a good summer."

"I will, Noah. Good luck. And don't forget that link."

She said hello. Noah ran up the stairs to the bedroom, turning his computer on and logging in. "I won't. Thanks. Good night."

"Good night, Noah."


"So what gives? I told you I was going to be here tonight, why didn't you call me?" Lori shook her head. "We could've sat together. I thought you said you were going to stay home and have a night with -"

"I was pondering it and then Noah called." Rachel pursed her lips. Impeccable timing as always. "I had to get out, all right? And I didn't want to call you because I had a feeling I would leave early, as I just did, and frankly, I'm disgusted that I did. I know better, but I couldn't stand that drivel, Lor, it was -"

Lori smirked. "Told you so. You're not the only one who knows what they're talking about when it come to theater, Ms. 'I've been to every recital in everything at Juilliard'." She poked Rachel in the shoulder. "Wanna wait for me and go to Jamba Juice or something?"

"You and Sam aren't on a date? I don't want to disrupt your evening, Lori." Rachel frowned briefly. But I don't want to go home...

"I told you, he lost points for not coming after me. I think he just wanted to get out, I don't even know if he thinks we're on a date. Besides, I could really go for a Jamba Juice. Gimme ten minutes. Call home, let them know you'll be home later." Lori turned back to the auditorium. "And next time? Just call me. I don't care about walking out, obviously." She tossed a wave behind her.

Where in the world did she come from? Shaking her head, Rachel pulled out her cell phone and dialed her father's number. At least I know he'll pick up.


Will and Dan huddled around the computer. "This is crazy, you know."

Dan slapped at his husband's hand, clicking 'refresh' again. "The boy who broke our daughter's heart wrong a song about it? What's crazy about wanting to hear it? It's like...like a Nicholas Sparks novel or something. Though - bad analogy. I don't want it ending in someone dying or having Alzheimer's or -"

"All right, I get the point, honey. And I - oh!" Will grabbed the mouse and opened the new email. "Oh, that's not it."

"I am calling you..." Rachel's voice sang from Will's abandoned cell phone.

Dan answered quickly, waving Will to refresh the page. "Hi, honey, how are you?"

"Dad?" Rachel frowned quickly. "I thought I called Daddy's phone?" You don't often answer it, even for me.

"You did, sweetheart. Your father and I are just sitting on the couch, I was closer to his phone." Pointing urgently at the screen, Dan waved at the email from Noah. "How are you? How was the show?"

"Oh, the show was hideous, Dad," she murmured. Lori wasn't joking. "I bumped into Lori though, and we're going to go to Jamba Juice. I'll be home a little later."

"Sounds good, pumpkin, and glad you ran into her. Just unwind, okay?"

Rachel smiled, rolling her eyes. As expected. "Daddy didn't tell you he gave the speech already today? Your turn is tomorrow, Dad, but I'll just credit it and neither of you has to say anything, how's that?"

Dan grinned. "Honey, you know it's because we love you."

"I know, Dad, and I greatly and deeply appreciate it," she replied. I do, believe it or not. "It's unnecessary. It's not like I'm doing anything unhealthy. I'm just very interested in my craft right now."

"Uh-huh. So you go to the show that Lori was complaining about having anything to do with." Dan shook his head. "I spoke to Lori when she called today. She told me about it. Sounds like a great way to develop your craft. How to be a sucky actor or playwright?"

"Dad!" Rachel ran a hand through her hair. Everyone's a critic. Including me. Ugh. "Either way, I'll be home later and I love you both."

"Love you too, Rach, sorry to be a pain. We'll see you in the morning." Dan hung up hurriedly. "That's him!"

Will gnawed on a fingernail. "I know." He opened the link in a new tab, pausing to let it load. "This should be interesting..."


Lori waved as the group scattered, joining Rachel to sit on the brick border next to the building. "Hey. Jamba Juice?"

"Yes, that sounds lovely." She leaned her head on Lori's shoulder. "Do they have an add-in to erase melancholy thoughts?" I would like a gallon of it, please. This is why I don't sit.

Laughing, Lori stroked her hair. "Don't think so. I think those add-ins are for the over-21 set."

Red cup in hand, his eyes on hers. Connor handing her a margarita. Two bottles of wine, filled with unpleasant truths.

"I think I can skip those, for a while." Rachel closed her eyes, shaking her head. Nothing good has come of it. "A long, long while."


Noah exhaled heavily and stood, grabbing the letter and tearing it to pieces over the garbage can. Attempt one: fail. Back to the drawing board. He pulled the sheet music from the drawer, shoving them into the expanding file folder in his closet. I can't believe I sent Will the link.

"Oh, shit." Rubbing his hands over his head, he clicked the link. You know what you said. You practiced enough.

His recorded self cleared his throat. "My name is Noah Puckerman, and I'm applying for the Bachelor's in Music Composition at NYU. My N number is -"

Well that's just fucking great. He clicked it off, dropping his head to the desk.


"...so princess I'll see you
somewhere inside
this is the last time
and you look so beautiful

No, I won't let go
out on your road
so violently
but I still believe
time passes slow
just let her be
just let her go..."

Will met Dan's gaze over his shoulder. "That was - if that was for Rachel -"

Dan bit his lip, running a hand over his head. "I know. He's such a mess, isn't he?"

Will nodded. "Absolutely. Every phone call. And now, knowing that? It totally explains how depressed he sounded." Will spun in the computer chair, shaking his head as he stood and wrapped his arms around Dan. "He's trying to get here."


Lori dragged her up. "Come on, time to sugar your troubles away."

Rachel took a deep breath, standing. "Will that solution apply all year long? Sugaring myself?" Diabetes, here I come.

Hooking an arm through Rachel's, Lori thoughtfully tilted her head. "Well, no. You're pretty high strung on a good day. You just seem in a funk right now. Hence, sugar. But on a regular basis? I think it'd be dangerous. Like coffee." She guided them down the block. "So how about you stop expecting to be miserable, stop avoiding me and your dads, and start living? High school is gone, Rach. Let it go."

Rachel opened the door to the smoothie shop, making a face at her friend. I'm enjoying myself! "I am not -"

"- a good liar. Rach, it's obvious, okay? I don't even need to be your dad. You're gonna run yourself down. Just be careful." Lori pecked her on the cheek as she went by. "You really don't have to be as hard on yourself as you're being. Shit didn't work out. It happens. You need to take care of yourself, though, Puck and Connor are just fine. Don't beat yourself up over it, it's not worth it. Just join the world of the living, okay?"

"Of course I will, Lori, don't be silly. I wouldn't do that to myself. I would never put myself in a situation to compromise my career." I am living. I am. Rachel turned to the clerk. "Acai with wheatgrass, thank you, medium sized." She blew out a breath. "I'm sorry to worry you, Lori, but I assure you, I'm fine. This year will be different, I'll put myself out there. I will."


Noah chewed his lower lip, staring down at the phone. Should I call? Do I say something? Shit. He sat back at the computer, opening his email. They may not even have watched it yet. They may not watch it at all. Fuck if I know. Hitting "reply all", he exhaled and typed.

Please, don't say anything to Rachel. I don't want her hopes up if it turns out I don't make it. That's if she'd actually want me anywhere around. "Fuck it," he muttered, and hit send, turning away quickly. What a fucking mess.

Will looked at Dan as the mail alert sounded. "Should I get that?"

Dan shrugged, dropping his arms. "Go for it, but then let's just open a bottle of wine and watch America's Sweethearts. I'm spent."

Laughing, Will sat and moved the mouse to turn on the screen. "Oh - Dan, it's from Noah again."

Dan rested his chin on Will's shoulder to read. "Oh, honey..."

Will sighed, shrugging Dan off his shoulder, and typed.

Noah looked up from the guitar as his laptop beeped. His heart sped up as he crossed the room to check it. Well, shit. He rubbed a hand over his mouth. Shit.

Dan trailed Will from the room. "Sweetheart, what did you say?"

Will glanced back over his shoulder with a small smile. "I told him good luck."


December

"I know, Lori, but I have the recital tonight with the chamber singers." That is far superior to yet another attempt at match-making. Rachel clutched her scarf tighter as she walked.

"Rach! You knew we were trying to make plans for Friday." Lori ran a hand through her hair. "And this guy is really nice, I swear. He's seen you at the master classes and -"

"Lor, no, you know I don't date anyone who says they've seen me perform and they want to get to know me." Rachel pursed her lips. I don't quite trust them. Understandably so, based on my history.

"Rach, you don't date anybody. You're a performing machine, and it's not good. You know it's not, you said before the semester started that you wouldn't do this!" She groaned into the phone. "Go, sing, perform, escape. But I'm coming over later and we're going to talk!"

Rachel shook her head. No, we're not. "It's a Friday night, Lori, I am not in need of you disrupting your date. I'm sorry, but we'll have to catch up some other time, all right?" Like when you stop trying to set me up. "I must go. Give Connor my best."

Lori's voice was muffled as she talked to her boyfriend. "Yes, you were right. All right, yes, good thing." She turned her attention back to Rachel. "He knew you weren't going to say yes, so he told Aaron we'd call him and let him know the details. Good thing." The last two words were pointedly sarcastic.

They're doing just fine. Rachel smiled. "You two are adorable."

Lori rolled her eyes. "Tell me that when he's annoying the shit out of me. I don't know how you survived."

"I was quite firmly in the drivers seat. I honestly don't think we managed to have a real relationship, it merely appeared we did." As with most everything in my life, Shakespeare applies - full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. Rachel blew into her hands. "Lor, I'm here, I must go."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm still gonna try to catch you later. Have fun, Rach, will you?" She gave an exasperated sigh, turning back towards Connor.

"This is fun, Lori, just because I spend my time performing doesn't mean that I'm not enjoying myself, I assure you. I'm in New York City - it's what I came here to do." Opening the door, she closed her eyes. Heat, glorious, glorious heat..."Though I believe New York has utterly ruined my capacity for cold."

"I still don't get how you wore those skirts in the dead of winter. Really, Rach?" Lori's tone was bemused.

Puck waiting at her locker, hot cocoa and a smile. "Need to warm up. You remember the cure for hypothermia, don't you?" Tossing her books in the locker, grabbing her waist in icy hands to lead her off.

Rachel shook herself. Stop it. "I wore tights and the maintenance crew were very good about plowing the paths. Unlike the city, we didn't shut down when it snowed." We only shut down emotionally in Lima. She waved as the director walked by. "In any event -"

"I know, I know. Go. I should've known," Lori huffed. "Next time I'll just consult your calendar of events on the website. If it's possible you could be in it, I'm just gonna have to assume you are."

Rachel rolled her eyes. Oh, honestly..."Lori, you're being melodramatic. It's not everything." They told me I had to prioritize, since there are only limited slots alloted.

Lori smirked as she replied. "Right, because they won't let you. But honey, when people from my school know you? Come on, that's pretty crazy. You've been to as many master classes with me as -"

"As you've been to with me!" Rachel protested. Being known amongst my peers isn't wrong! "It just so happens that I'm a bit more vocal than most in that setting."

"Honey, you ask more questions than the moderator. Whatever, go sing." Lori hung up with a sigh.

Connor rubbed her shoulders. "You knew this was probably going to happen, Lori. You can't pretend to be surprised."

She tipped her head back with a smile. "Yeah, I know. I just really wanted to be wrong." Pursing her lips, she grumbled, "I still think if Aaron were here -"

"Seriously, Lor? Come on, you know she won't listen to anyone. She would've made her apologies, been annoyed at you for meddling, and done exactly as she's doing now. You know that as well as I do."

"But I'm out of ideas, Connor, I want her better, but I don't know what else to do!" She pouted at her boyfriend.

"Which is why Will keeps saying to stop pushing. There's nothing to be gained, babe. She knows you love her and you want what's best for her." He shook his head. "Other than that, you're not getting from her yet."

"Ugh. Fine. I get it. But I don't have to like it!" She turned in his arms. "I just don't want to watch her fall apart."

Connor raised a brow. "Um, in case you haven't noticed? She's not falling apart. That would require stillness. She's not letting herself be idle."

"Okay, fine, I hate knowing that the first time she stops, really stops, she's gonna crumble. Better?" She raised a brow sarcastically.

"More precise." He kissed her. "Come on, I'm still worth your time, right?"

"Eh, maybe. I think I'll keep you." She leaned up to peck him on the lips. "Let me just call Will and Dan and let them know I couldn't get her. Not like they'll be shocked." She slipped from his arms and dialed quickly.

Will shook his head as his phone rang. "Well, at least I know it's not Noah, right?"

Dan grinned and passed him the cell. "Oh, it's Lori. I knew it. Rachel wouldn't go."

"Hey Lori, guessing you lost her to the chamber singers?" Will sighed, rolling his eyes.

Lori laughed. "Yeah. I think I'm the only one who thought I even had a chance." She rubbed a hand over her forehead. "Is she ever gonna slow down?"

Will put his feet up on the couch and laid his head back. "I haven't seen her like this since Jesse broke up with her. She just kept going and going until she and Noah..."

"Oh." Lori bit her lip. "Well, that doesn't sound like a good idea here."

Chuckling, Will nodded. "No, not at all. It's probably the most relaxed I've seen her, but highly unlikely to work in this scenario."

"Too bad he couldn't just up and move here. You know he loves her, even if he doesn't really get it yet." Lori chewed the inside of her cheek.

"Oh, I think he gets it now. It's just a matter of what he can do about it. Unfortunately the reality is picking up and moving to New York City like we did is the exception, not the rule." Will took Dan's hand. "He can't afford to move, he's got school and work and his family. Rachel needs to be okay by herself anyway. Anything else would be a disaster for her."

"I know, I know. Just can't help but wish it could be otherwise, seeing her like this." Lori shook her head. "Anyway, gotta go."

"No problem. Tell Connor hello from us, and we'll hopefully see you soon." Will squeezed his husband's hand.

"Thanks, Will. Talk to you later." Lori hung up, scrunching her mouth thoughtfully. "I wonder..."

"Those are dangerous words," Connor replied, slipping his arm around her waist. "You say 'I wonder' and I hear 'I want to get into trouble'."

Lori stuck her tongue out at her boyfriend. "I was just trying to think of ways to get Rachel to stop and just be, okay? That's all. What makes you think it's trouble?"

Rolling his eyes, Connor steered them towards the movie theater. "Because it's always trouble with you - you just can't help yourself."

"She's my best friend, Connor, I have to try. Anyway, whatever, I'll do it later. Let's go find a dark corner to canoodle." She waggled her eyebrows at him suggestively.

"I love your vocabulary," he teased. Printing their tickets from the kiosk, he led them into the theater.


I shouldn't have done this recital. Rachel plastered on a smile as the accompanist gave them the opening chord. I hate this piece. I really do. I just can't stand it. Nodding, she drew a deliberate breath, cueing the rest of the women's chorus to do the same before she started to sing.

"Rushing and racing
and running in circles
Moving so fast, I'm forgetting my purpose
Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning
Getting nowhere..."

She cast a suspicious look at the director. Damn Jacobsen. She think I'm doing too much, I wouldn't put it past her to do this deliberately...Rachel smiled at her ensemble, inhaling to signal the next verse. But she's wrong. I'm fine. I'm just very active. And there's nothing wrong with that.

"My head and my heart are colliding, chaotic
Pace of the world
I just wish I could stop it
Try to appear like I've got it together
I'm falling apart..."

Nothing at all. I like to stay occupied and involved. A quick frown crossed her face. A little flat, Michelle. She smoothed the frown away, making eye contact with each member of the group before the chorus.

"Save me
Somebody take my hand, and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how..."

Rachel swept her left arm out, gesturing towards the audience with the ensemble. J doesn't understand, neither does Lori. And Dad and Daddy always worry. But I'm fine. I am. They just don't see it, they expect me to be distraught, broken.

"Sometimes I fear that I might disappear
In the blur of fast forward I falter again
Forgetting to breathe, I need to sleep
I'm getting nowhere..."

But I'm fine. She looked out into the crowd as the song neared its end.

"Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you to slow me down..."

"Breathe, Rach, let it go..." His mouth on her, his hands everywhere. "C'mon, Rach, trust me, let go..."

She shook herself. No. Stop it. Do not think about him.

"The noise of the world is getting me caught up
Chasing the clock and I wish I could stop it
Just need to breathe, somebody please -
Slow me down..."

Rachel closed her eyes, their voices drifting to silence. As the thunder of clapping hands reached her, she opened her eyes, smiling. Why would I want to slow down? This is all I need. She took a slow, deep breath, filling her ears with the sound of their adoration. Just this.


Noah tapped the eraser against his forehead, staring at the dots on the staff paper. This isn't right. Something's...fuck, I don't know, something's not sounding right. He hummed the bar to himself, changing a couple of notes before trying it again. "Maybe a different key?" he muttered.

"Couldn't hurt," Mr. Schuester said, looking over his shoulder. "Want me on the rhythm line?"

"Actually..." Noah handed him the sheet music. Crazy as this might seem..."How's your ukulele?"

Shooting him a disbelieving glance, Mr. Schue looked down at his score. "Ukulele, okay." He grabbed the instrument from his office, taking a seat at the music stand and starting to strum.

That sounds right. Nodding, Noah licked his lips and sang.

"Such is the way of the world,
You can never know
Just where to put all your faith
And how will it grow..
Gonna rise up
Burning black holes in dark memories...
Gonna rise up
Turning mistakes into gold..."

"What is that?" Will broke off, shaking his head. "I hear -"

"New Yoooorrrrk, concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there's nothing you caaaan't dooo..."

"What the - 'scuse me." That ringtone. I only gave it to one person. Puck lunged for his backpack, ripping the cell from the pocket. "Hello?"

"Puck? Did I catch you at a bad time?" Lori waved goodnight at Connor from her window.

Shit, it is her. He pounded a fist into his forehead. "Two minutes. Call you right back." Hanging up, he turned to Mr. Schue. What the fuck is Rachel's best friend doing calling me? "Um, can we maybe pick this up next week? I really need to take this call." I thought I was supposed to call her if I needed anything.

"Uh, sure, Puck. Let me know what works, I think we said Thursday." Standing, Will started straightening the room. "Have a good night, hope everything's okay."

"Yeah, me too," Noah muttered, hand clenching around his phone. "Me too." It fucking has to be.


"Thank you!" Rachel beamed at the audience, Ms. Jacobsen nodding at her. This is always all I need..."Ladies and gentlemen, as you know, this is a progressive chamber ensemble, which means we're working on modern pieces with a classic feel. In that vein, allow the men to show you Sting, as a men's four part harmony."

Soft guitar echoed from the back of the stage as the performers took their places.

Good luck topping us, gentlemen. She took her place in the front row, folding her arms as the drum softly kicked in. They're actually talented. She looked around the crowd, seeing them watching raptly. And the fact that they arranged this by ear is impressive...The drummer looked directly at her with a smile as the guitarist sang.

"And those who speak know nothing
And find out to their cost
That those who curse their luck in too many places,
And those who fear, are lost..."

Rachel frowned and blushed under his gaze, turning her eyes from the stage. Damn it, Cory, no. No drummers, no guitarists, no musicians, no boys. No.


Something is up with Rachel. He lightly jogged to the truck, hopping in and hitting redial before he turned the engine on. Gotta warm up the car anyway.

Lori snatched her cell from her nightstand. "Hello?"

You're on, Puckerman. He took a deep breath and spoke. "Um, hi, it's, uh, it's Noah, is this -"

Lori grinned and shook her head. "Noah, sorry, I called you Puck earlier. I shouldn't have assumed. And I have to say I'm impressed."

Fuck, I knew I shouldn't have - what the fuck is wrong with me, I have to just - He cleared his throat. "Yeah, no, whatever, it's cool, it doesn't matter, whatever. Forget it."

"Actually, I won't. I like it, and if there's ever a way to let her know, I will. That's actually what I'm calling about." She threw herself down on her bed. "Rach is running herself into the ground and I don't know what to do about it."

"You don't - did you talk to Will and Dan? I -" Shit, Puckerman. "I haven't called in a while, I've emailed and Will said -" He said she was fine..."I didn't - I had no idea she was -" He meant Rachel fine. He pounded his head against the steering wheel. She's supposed to be okay, damn it.

"Noah! Relax." Lori pinched the bridge of her nose. "Geez, you really are a mess. Maybe you're not qualified to help here."

He glared at the phone. No fucking way. You can't just tell me she's a wreck. "How bad is she?" The only way this works is if she's okay...

"Will said he hadn't seen her this way since Jesse, which is how I ended up thinking of you. You're what got her out." She paused to let that declaration penetrate. "And I know Rach. It wasn't just the physical that soothed her. I wanted to find out what you did emotionally that helped."

"Emotionally?" What is going on with you, Rachel? "Um, I think mostly I just let her talk. Nothing special."

"Damn it. She won't stay still long enough to talk about anything. That's the problem. She just bounces from one thing to the next and won't stop to breathe. If she does, she's gonna break. I want to at least soften the blow."

"What the fuck is going on? She's still running herself down? I heard that from Will and Dan in the summer - and that's after a whole freshman year of that shit. How can no one reach her?" Noah clenched a hand around the steering wheel. A year like this, Rachel?

Lori rolled her eyes. "Believe me, it's not for lack of trying! She's joined every ensemble on campus, has gotten a schedule of all the performances at mine, joined community choirs, is giving voice lessons and still works the Prom. Then there's school. And when she's home? She's doing work or practicing something or other. I mean, she stops to eat, but she won't let herself be still and thoughtful."

"That's the fucking antithesis of Rachel," he grumbled. She always saw too clearly, thought too much...

"Nice word choice! That's it exactly. Why do you think I actually called you? None of us can get through. We've all tried and she just brushes us off. Smiles and laughs and says she's fine."

"Like she did all through high school. Shit." He looked at the building, shaking his head. This is bad. Seriously bad.

"Exactly. Anything? Even just to piss her off, something? I just can't take it anymore. I'm watching her push herself harder and harder and I know, we can all see, that she's setting herself up. We just can't get her to stop." Lori rubbed her forehead.

Noah ran his hand over the back of his head. Fuck, Puckerman. You couldn't just get into the damn program. "The more you push, the worse she gets, right?"

"Yup. All, 'I'm fine, don't worry,' blah blah blah. I don't buy it."

"You shouldn't. It's a crock of shit." Not like she wants to hear it. Sighing, he leaned back. "Would I stop her, you think?"


Rachel clapped as the men finished their piece, smiling as she and the women's ensemble joined them. And here we go again...She blew out a breath as she took Cory's hands for the next piece. Please, just stop trying...

Cory rubbed his thumbs over the backs of her hands as he began to sing.


"What? You? No. Bad idea." Lori made a face at her phone. "Really bad idea."

"Why?" He sat up straighter. It sounds fucking perfect to me. "You called me looking for help. Well, I can be the one to stop her. I'll call her right now."

"I don't - I'm just -" Lori took a breath. "Look, Noah, you're kind of the reason she's a mess. She's trying to outrun you and Connor. Hearing from you would definitely stop her, but it might just break her."

"Isn't that kind of what you want? Better to break her now than later?" Not like I want to break her at all, damn it. Noah squeezed his eyes shut. Apparently I already did that...

"I - I don't - Well, shit. I didn't think this through, did I. I wanted thoughts on what I could do - I wasn't trying to get you to do something." Lori pressed her palms to her eyes.

"You can't expect me not to do anything!" Noah ran a hand over his face. "I did that for too fucking long," he muttered. And look where we ended up.

Lori groaned, rolling to bury her face in her mattress. "Connor was right, this is trouble."

He glanced at the clock in the dash. "You want my help? You've got it. Just not in the way you were thinking. I'll leave you out of it, I swear. And if she's so busy, she might not even pick up." Or she might not pick up for me. "But I can't just let her burn herself out, especially not because of me." He blew out a breath. "I'm not worth it."

"Oh, give me a break, I'm not doing this with you. Call Will for a pep talk." Lori sat up and shook her head. "I just - Fuck, be careful, all right? Please just be careful with her."

A bitter laugh escaped him. "You don't need to tell me. I already fucked it up." Shit, why couldn't I get in the first time? He looked around the parking lot and exhaled. "Believe me, I'm not trying to hurt her again."


I must be hallucinating, but I am so convinced J picked these songs for me...Rachel drew a breath, looking earnestly into Cory's eyes.

"And I know much more than I did back then,
But the more I learn,
The more I can't understand..."

Cory met her gaze with a smile, taking his half of the verse and squeezing her hands.

"And I've become content with this life that I lead,
Where I drink to much and don't believe in much of anything,
And I lie to myself,
And say it's for the best..."

Rachel let Cory go with a sigh of relief, threading through the line of men with the rest of the women do-si-do style for the chorus. Just focus on your performance.

"We're moving forward,
But holding ourselves back,
And we're waiting on something that will never come..."

The piano faded, the ensemble ending with their backs to each other.

Tricia Jacobsen stood to face the audience, smiling. "Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much. We have one more piece for you, and I hope it reminds you all to take time every day to stop, and breathe, and live." Turning to her ensemble, she raised her brows at Rachel, gesturing her and the rest forward.

All right, perhaps my intuition is correct...Rachel bit back a sigh as the director cued the pianist, lining up with the rest of the ensemble at the front of the stage.

"Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes,
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Moments so dear.
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
Six hundred minutes
How do you measure, measure a year?"


"Yeah, I know you're not trying, Noah, but the fact is you weren't trying back then either, and you still managed to rip her heart out. The two of you just don't -"

"No, see, that's the problem. We do. We do work, and if I hadn't been too much of an asshole to see that sooner? We'd be fucking phenomenal. But I was an ass, and she was too good and let me go. I don't know what the fuck else to say, I'm trying here, but I'm not going to fuck this up and I'm not letting her kill herself like this over me. I'm not." He shook his head. "It's been great talking to you, Lori, but I gotta go." I have to do something. I can't just sit back and hope she's okay. I can't.

Lori opened and closed her mouth, struggling for words. "Well, shit. Could you call me back and let me know what happens, so I'm prepared?"

He nodded, turning on the truck. I'm not having this conversation here. "You're probably not going to hear from me for a while. I'm gonna try my damndest to reach her." Yeah, if she even wants to hear from you.

"That's fair. When you can." Lori paused. "And, um...thanks."

"No need to thank me. Trust me." I've got a hell of a lot of shit to make up for. "I just want her to be okay."

"We all do, Noah. That's why I reached out to you - I'm desperate. Nothing is getting through. And I can't stand by and wait for the breakdown. I can't. I love her too much to do that."

"Same here," he said quietly. "Catch you later." Hanging up, he pulled out of the parking lot. Get my ass home, lock myself in the bedroom, and make a phone call...


Rachel let out a breath, looking out at the audience as they dispersed. Regardless of the song selections, this was a worthwhile venture. She headed back into the dressing rooms.

"Rachel?" Cory called after her. "Hey, do you wanna grab dinner or something? I'm starving, maybe we could grab Mamoun's?"

She looked around. "Oh, is everyone going?" Rachel reached in for her cell phone, turning it back to ring. "I would love some sort of ensemble bonding activity." Please, Cory, I've had this conversation with you already.

"Uh, no, I, um, I was hoping it could be just us." He shrugged sheepishly, shoving his hands in his pockets. "I was hoping maybe we could spend some time together, I could get to know you better. You're always so busy."

What is it with everyone? "I like to be involved, and I take my career very seriously. If that results in my being socially inaccessible, it's a risk I'm willing to take in pursuit of my future." She set her mouth firmly. I knew he didn't take me seriously. "And I've said I'm really not looking for romance, Cory, I'm very sorry but -"

"Who said it had to be romantic? I mean, yeah, I would love it to be - singing lead with you is like, amazing - but -"

"Cory, I simply cannot and will not risk it, knowing you have any amorous intentions," she interjected. I won't make that mistake again. "I am not in any place to entertain such notions. I truly am sorry, but I refuse to chance you becoming more attached than -"

"Rachel, I'm an adult, all right? I can handle it, I -"

"Ohhhhhhh, sweet Caroline..."

What in the world? Hands shaking, Rachel reached into her bag, blinking in confusion. Why would - what does he - "Cory, I -" She stared at the cell display. I'm not imaging things. He's calling. He's calling me. She looked up at Cory's expectant face and down at the number on her phone. "I -" I can't. Forcing a smile, she hit the ignore button. "I shouldn't make decisions for you. Let's go get dinner." Why would he - "But how about Whole Foods, if you don't mind? I'm in the mood for a Jamba Juice and their salad bar." Plus it's noisy, so we won't talk about anything too significant and then I just go home. Practice, bed. Routine. She glanced down at the cell in her palm with a frown before switching it to vibrate and dropping it back into her bag.

"Yeah, great! That's fine! Let's - are you ready now?" Cory beamed at her, holding out a hand.

She wrapped both of her hands around her bag, nodding and preceding him to the door. "Yes, I am." Better the devil I don't know, in this instance...


Well, shit. You knew that was a possibility. He listened to her overly cheerful message with a frown, strumming his guitar, and hung up. Though voicemail...


Rachel placed her tray on the table with a quick smile at Cory. "I'm just going to get my Jamba Juice, I'll be right back." She walked to the center of the floor, reaching into her bag for her wallet. What is - ringing again? She flipped the phone up to see. No. Not picking up. Not now.


Okay, she's not answering. He hung up the phone, tossing it onto the bed and resting the guitar on his hip. Fine. I try again in a bit. Lemme do something productive. He picked out a melody, closing his eyes.


Rachel sipped the last of her smoothie, pushing her tray to the side. Time to end this before he gets attached. "Well, that was lovely, Cory, thank you for the company. Unfortunately, I must return home - my schedule tomorrow is relentless."

Shaking his head, Cory slid from the booth, grabbing her tray. "That's your schedule every day, Rachel. I did actually enjoy myself just then. I wish you had too."

How have I still managed to hurt him? Rachel shook her head, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Cory -"

"No, it's okay. You warned me, I get it. You're not ready. But hey, if you are? Call me. I know you have the phone list." He dropped a awkward kiss on her cheek. "Good night, Rachel."

"G-good night, Cory." Rachel bit her lip, feeling her phone vibrate again. I'm not looking.


Do I even say anything? Do I need to? Will she get it?

"...at the tone." Rachel's voice cut off, the beep coming quickly after.

Clearing his throat, Noah started picking the melody he'd formulated earlier. It's Rachel. She'll get it. He took a breath and started to sing.

"If I could trace the lines that ran
Between your smile and your sleight of hand
I would guess that you put something up my sleeve
Now every time I see your face the bells ring in a far-off place
We can find each other this way I believe..."


She traced the outline of her phone through the fabric of her bag. Do I want to check it? Did he leave a message? She shook her head, going into the subway. Now I won't have the option. The local train, please. She swiped through and took her seat with a sigh. Why would he call me? Rachel watched the stations pass, twirling her phone between her fingers. Do I want to know? She closed her eyes, shaking her head. You have no idea. You won't have any idea for at least another fifteen minutes. So stop it.


Noah closed his eyes as he played. I hope you listen, Rach - really listen...

"Though I'm here in this far off place
My air is not this time and space
I draw you close with every breath.
You don't know it's right until it's wrong
You don't know it's yours until it's gone
I didn't know that it was home 'til you up and left.

Come and find me now..."


Rachel took the stairs at a slow jog. I just want to get into air conditioning faster. That's all. As she reached the lobby of her building, she pulled her cell phone from her bag. One new message. An actual message. From Noah. To me. Swallowing hard, she sat in one of the chairs outside the elevators. Now or never.


"You...what?" Lori blinked, perplexed. "You...wrote a song on her voicemail."

"Well, not exactly, but kinda yeah. I, um, I wrote one in between attempted calls. And left it on her voicemail." That's not crazy, is it? Rubbing a hand over the back of his neck awkwardly, he laughed. "I seem to do better that way than trying to talk."

Lori shook her head. "I'll be expecting a tearful phone call then. You really know how to get to Rachel, Noah. Don't think that you don't." She checked for her keys and her wallet, turning on the television. "I may as well stay awake, there's no telling what time she'll check."

A half-smile curved his lips. If I still know her..."If she's not a complete mess? She'll check tonight. And sooner. She might delay a little bit, but not for long." He finished the last notation on the staff paper, his face falling. "And hopefully it'll help, one way or another." You have to hang in, Rach, you have to...

"Noah, I guarantee you this - hearing from you? She'll have a reaction. And especially to a song." Lori sighed. "You really did work, jackass."

"Yeah, no shit. I'm trying to fix that," he muttered, adding the song to his portfolio. That's the fucking problem.

"What was that last bit?" Brows furrowed, Lori plugged her other ear with her finger. "Did I miss something?"

"Nothing." Watch you fucking mouth, Puckerman! "Listen, just...just take care of her. Please."

"Noah, I told you - you don't have to ask me." Smiling at the phone, she added, "And I know I don't have to ask you."

Noah gazed at the picture taped to the inside cover of the folder. "Not for her." And I wish I'd gotten that sooner.


"I keep you in a flower vase
With your fatalism and your crooked face
With the daisies and the violet brocades

And I keep me in a vacant lot
In the ivy and forget-me-nots
Hoping you will come and untangle me one of these days.

Come and find me now..."

Rachel sat motionless. He - what in the - just a song, on my voicemail? No - no talking, no explanation, just...a song? And not only that, but a song about finding him? Has he gone mad? Furiously blinking back tears, she stood and headed upstairs to the apartment.

"Rachel? Is that you?" Dan poked his head out from the den. "Is everything all right?"

"Fine, Dad. It's just fine." She plastered a smile on as she passed. "Tired. Going to bed, I think. I might call Lori over. Not sure yet." Not sure of anything.

"Um, sure, honey, that's fine. Have a good night." Dan raised a brow as Will entered the room. "Something's up."

"Something's up," Will agreed, nodding. "Sit back, wait it out."

"You think something happened at the performance?" Dan asked in a hush.

"I have no clue."


Rachel paced the room. Come and find you - are you insane? After all of this, after everything. Come and find you? She brushed furiously at her cheeks. Find you. In Lima. Where everything in my life was a joke, just a fleeting moment of happiness before I was crushed again. Why would I go back to that? Come and find you. No. You will not do this to me. I refuse. She dried the tears from her cheeks. You will not. I am not going back, and you said I belonged here. Come find me if you want, but I will not regress. I'm never setting foot in that town again, not until I am the star I was born to be. Come and find me, how dare you? You drove me away, you ruined everything. Gritting her teeth, she crossed to the window, gazing at the city. This is home. And no one had to leave me behind for me to figure it out.


Noah looked at the display on his cell phone. Midnight. You didn't actually expect her to call you, Puckerman. After all that shit, you can't expect that. He put the phone back on his nightstand, looking out the window. She already tried. Now it's your turn to do the work. Picking up his portfolio, he flipped through the pieces he'd written in the months since he was rejected. And that's exactly what I'm gonna do. I'm doing good in my classes, and writing like a fiend.

I'm gonna get back to you, Rach. Just you wait.


Musical notes, in order of appearance:

Noah's song for Rachel: Untitled, Jericho
Women's ensemble: Slow Me Down, Emmy Rossum
Song Noah and Mr. Schue are working on: Rise, Eddie Vedder
Men's ensemble: Shape of My Heart, Sting
Full chamber ensemble: It's for the Best, Straylight Run; Seasons of Love, Rent
Noah's song on Rachel's voicemail: Come and Find Me, Josh Ritter

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