Chapter 9: Did I Fall in Love? Or did I just Discover it?

Yume's POV

Today was another day to do an activity to boost my career in the idol world. I have to keep working hard, because if not, my name will soon disappear from the Idol Industry.

I walk out into town, trying to find some places available to sing at. Concerts were a natural event to make new fans, and the most basic way. I decided to search around, and discover places with a lot of space, so more people can visit.

"Hmm, I wonder if Subaru is okay.." The idea pops into my curious mind randomly.

"W-wait a minute.. I shouldn't be thinking of him so randomly.." I thought, as the idea made me fidget with my hands randomly.

I kept checking places out, but the more and more and more places I see, the more I can't stop worrying over Subaru. Why was I even worrying about him? I know he's okay.. but yet, I still have a paranoid conscious, that keeps asking me repeatedly the most 'worst-scenario questions'...

"What if he suddenly dies because he isn't drinking enough and is becoming dehydrated because YOU didn't check up on him?"

"What if his heart EXPLODES because YOU didn't check up on him?"

"What if-"

Okay, I know I have to check up on him.. I just have to, if not, I might not be able to sleep tonight... ^ • ^

\\===/

I figure this is love, but I don't want to admit it. Why does my head get lightheaded when he's around? Why do butterflies randomly appear in my stomach when he's around? Why does my heart beat uncontrollably when I'm around him? Do my cheeks turn red because of this feeling?

I sit down on a nearby bench, leaving reality to join my thoughts. He is honest, kind, sweet, cute, cool... wait, why should I even be thinking this? JUST A FEW WEEKS AGO, I was perfectly fine being his acquaintance, his friend, his rival. Now, all I can think about him is positive traits that persuade me in every way to like him.

I.. need to figure this feeling very soon!

I feel romantic around him, shy around him, and I act like a little like a tsundere around him. I need to learn and know what I feel towards him soon. I know I need to.

I wake up to see the ceiling to my room, as I sit up and look around. I slowly get out of my bed and look in a mirror. My hair was a real mess.. that was for sure.

I brush my hair casually, looking at my closet to figure out what to wear. Today was a pretty sunny day, so I thought to wear something bright, colorful, and natural. I quickly, but neatly, put on my signature pigtails, and take a simple, cute, pale pink dress. It had a touchy edge that I personally liked, so I put it on with some white and golden sandals. I remembered to add my pink bow on, and knew at that moment, I was ready to go to my best friend, Laura.

She was always there for me, so I think she would support me and help me with my big decision. Do I lo-lo-like like him, or just like him.

I walk into the cafeteria, seeing Laura at a table.

I quickly rush over to her, with a worried expression on my face, nervous on how to start this conversation.

"L-Laura..." I begin the conversation, giving direct eye contact.

"Yea? Why're you so nervous all of the sudden? Did something go wrong?" She asks me with a confused look, tilting her head slightly.

"Umm, can we talk for a little bit.. it's about something personal.." I reply, sitting across from her afterwards.

"Sure, what do you need to talk about?" She says with a bright smile, paying attention to every word I say.

"I-I might have feelings toward.. Subaru." I whisper to her ear, while my cheeks become pink at the thought.

Her eyes widen with surprise, as she turns her head to my eyes, knowing this topic was serious.

"Okay, but how are you going to identify these feelings for sure?"

I was shocked myself, seeing how easy she took the statement I previously said. I could tell that she knew I was thinking this, as her next words were pretty surprising.

"I could tell you had some feelings for him." She adds on, making me blush profusely.

"I'll probably ask him myself what this feeling is!" I exclaim with a confident and determined attitude, standing up to emphasize how serious I am.

"Good luck. I'll be supporting you on this, no matter what happens. I'll always have your back." She makes me feel more calm, happy, and eager at the sentence.

I leave the cafeteria shortly with a confident expression. I go near the boys division of the academy, walking to the place where Subaru was. Not only to ask.. but to see if he was better.

I kept on walking within the stone path, wondering why it was so long. It felt like 10 minutes already, yet it was only 2 minutes. I walk and look only at the path, until someone fell on me. Why does this keep happening?

"Woah, sorry! I wasn't looking- Yume?" I look up, seeing Asahi.

"H-hey." I stutter, taking Asahi's hand, getting up with a slightly dirty dress.

"Why are you coming here?" He asks, seeing I was heading towards the Boys Division.

"I'm just going to visit Subaru. Now don't think I actually like him, because I would rather despise him than to do that. I'm only checking up on him because... I had nothing else to do!" I say with a lame excuse, my cheeks becoming a light red.

"Okay, okay. Good luck, not that you'll need it!" He yells, jogging to a distance.

It was 7:50AM. I wondered if he was awake yet. I was kept from my location because of all of the events popping up. I really wanted to know if he was okay though..

"Meow" I hear a cat yell softly.

I couldn't avoid a poor cat if they were in trouble, so I ran to the destination of the noise. I climb up the tree slowly, reaching my hand towards the feeble cat.

"I won't bite. Come here, it's alright.." I say with a sweet smile, as the cat goes into my arms.

I bring the cat down, and kept carrying it, wondering where the cat's owner was. I looked at the cute cat, cuddling with its pure white fur.

I see Kanata running towards me, until he suddenly stops and pants a little.

"Hey, did you see a cat with white fur and green eyes? A little girl said her lost cat went this way-" Kanata suddenly stops mid-sentence, seeing the current cat I was holding.

"Oh, is this a little girl's cat? I'll go bring it to her immediately!" I almost panicked, not able to see a sweet little child crying at her lost cat that I've found.

"Don't worry. I can bring it to her. I'm going somewhere near her location anyways." Kanata offers, as I put the cat into Kanata's arms afterwards.

"Thanks. Be careful!" I yell, waving goodbye to Kanata as he jogs away.

"Why are there so many distractions lately? I haven't even gotten halfway to the infirmary!" I thought with an impatient look, continuing to walk peacefully.

I soon fasten my pace, eventually running to the infirmary.

"I hate that I worry about him so much..." I murmur under my breath, running faster and faster.

- 5 Minutes Later -

I walk up to the infirmary door, gently opening it, in case he was still sleeping. The gap between the door and wall widens, and I peek inside with a quick glance, only to see an empty bed.

"Excuse me, where's Subaru?" I ask the doctor there, who was currently looking into some paperwork.

"Sorry, he went out at 5:00AM. He's probably in his room, considering he hasn't fully recovered yet." The doctor replies with a kind tone.

"Okay.. thanks." My last words were, before exiting the infirmary.

I walk to M4's dorm, knocking onto the door with a quick and hard tap.

"Anyone in here? Hello?" I ask eagerly, before a familiar face answers the door.

"Oh, Yume! What're you doing here at this time?" Nozomu asks with a gentle smile.

"Umm, is Subaru here? I just came here to check up on him..." I say quietly, becoming flustered at the statement.

"No, but you could wait here. Asahi told me that he would be back in a few minutes." Nozomu gives me a kind gesture, welcoming me in.

I step inside and sit onto one of the plump couches, gazing at the grand room. It was pretty neat, with mature designs. When I become a member of S4, I'll be sure to get privileges like these.

"I'm going out to work on a commercial. You can stay here, I'll be back later." Nozomu puts on a hat, before waving me goodbye.

Shortly after he leaves, I was left alone with nothing to do. I impatiently sat there, becoming more restless by the second.

"Hmm, does Subaru even.. feel anything special towards me? Is this an unrequited.. lo-lov- special feeling?" I ask myself questionably, tapping my chin lightly.

"Let's get into happier thoughts.. how'll he react to seeing me randomly? Oooohhhh..." I smirk deviously, thinking of a fun way to catch his funniest reaction.

I politely went into his room, and hid behind his bed. I practiced multiple ways to give him a playful scare, laughing at every one.

"What's this?" I look at a notepad curiously, before I gasp at the words entitled on top of the object.

"Ways to Ask Her Out..." I whisper to myself.. shocked that he liked someone.

"Does he already like someone..? I knew it. Why did I think everything would fall into place.. I was oblivious to reality.. Still.. I can't believe it..!" I look at the notepad, almost afraid to look deeper into it.

I slowly, carefully, and gently open it.

"1. Give her diamond ring and ask her out with a confident smirk.

Positives:

- Gives the strong, leadership like personality

- Most likely will say yes due to ring

Negatives

- Won't fall for such shallow strategies

- Might look arrogant

- I want to ask her out, not marry her

- WHERE IS THE MONEY TO BUY HE DIAMOND RING?"

I laugh at the last line, envying the lucky girl who Subaru likes. I continue reading, getting more hurt by every word, grasping the fact that he already liked someone else.

"2. Happily ask her on a random, sunny day. Smile!

Positives:

- Looks carefree

- Closer and better

- Smiles are always the best way to ask her out

Negatives:

- Unlike me to be so energetic and carefree

- Too random

- Undetermined location on where I will meet her next. What if I meet her in the rain?

- Too vague"

It looks like he put a lot of effort into this.. some lucky girl out there..

I continue reading, before I hear the door creak open. I panicked under pressure for a minute.

"Y-Yume! What're you doing here..?" He basically yells as he sees me near his bed. In his room. I close the notebook with my unstable hands, throwing it to the desk nearby.

I slowly turn around, seeing Subaru giving me the confused look. I hold onto my clothes tightly, letting all of my frustration out silently. I look at him with a surprised, but awkward expression.

"I-I wasn't doing anything!" I yell, my chest tightening with the feeling of guilt. I look at him with an insecure expression, hiding my deep sorrow.

He quickly changes his look into his usual cool and calm attitude.

"Boiled Octopus, you shouldn't be in my room, at least.. not when your going to be all red like that." He teases me, making the atmosphere less tense. I try to play along, even though I was still holding onto the fact that he liked someone else.

"N-no way! I am not a boiled octopus, thank you very much! I'm just here to check up on you.. until I realized you weren't here.." I play with my hair, barely able to talk to him in a confident tone, my voice being barely audible at the last word.

"Why can't you notice.. my feelings for you.. I'm carrying this burden all by myself.. and you are oblivious to my.. lo-love." I whisper to myself with agony.

I look at the bags containing multiple items. I try to carry on a normal conversation, making sure that he doesn't worry about me after I leave.

"What are you holding?" I ask with a curious look, poking at them with a playful grin, trying to think of him as my rival once again.

He is lost in thought, his eyes widening at my statement.. Okay, now I'm seriously curious.

"I'm holding something that is none of your buisness. So, onto more important matters, what were you doing here while I was away? Or did you just come here?" He says after a short moment of silence, obviously trying to change the topic. However, his question made me worry. Does he know what I looked through?

I panic, and improvise right on the spot.

"O-oh, I-I.. umm.. JUST arrived here! Yea..." I almost screamed due to my nervousness.

Silence has fall onto the room once again, as I daze off into thoughts... negative thoughts.

"Wait.. why should I be sad that Subaru likes someone..? Don't I.. only think of him as a rival? These feelings could be mixed with friendship. Why.. why did I figure out my feelings now, when it's all too late..."

Touching my cheek with my left hand, I whisper,

"Tears.."

It's all too late.. Why was I so oblivious to these feelings called love? If I just figured out sooner... I wouldn't be in this mess. Of course Subaru would fall for someone soon. There are so many idols to go to.. maybe Hime-Senpai. Yea.. everyone ships them. Hime-Senpai would be perfect for Subaru. They're both charming, kind, talented, and.. out of my league.

Wailing and crying with these hopeless eyes of mine, I give my last hug to Subaru, knowing this might be my last chance to be so bold.

"It's okay.." I hear his reassuring voice, making me burst even louder.

"Why won't these tears stop falling.. why am I so sad over nothing.." I tried to get the words out, as it is my own fault for being so naive.

Feeling his hand stroking my hair made my nerves feel calm, my brain relax, and my burdens fly away. Why couldn't we just stop time at this very moment? It would be so nice if I could just stay there.. forever.

"T-thanks. I-I'll be going now.. hope you're better." I end this dream, knowing I had no chance. Quickly walking away, I suddenly stop.. feeling a strong hand squeezing my wrist. I glance at his face, seeing his own nervousness in those beautiful blue eyes.

"Want to.." Subaru speaks up, trailing off afterwards.

"Hmm?" Is all I could say, having no idea what he wanted. Groceries? Medicine? I turn around to look at his vulnerable state. He was.. cute. His hand on my wrist, bangs covering his eyes, and his cheeks.. glowing as bright as a tomato.

"Want to go out some time?" I freak out, immediately thinking he was cheating on me with someone else. WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?

Hold on.. maybe those notes.. were meant for me.

His timid and shy personality is finally coming out, making me admire this very moment. That happy, kind, and shy smile is something so unlikely to happen. I cherish this moment, before finally grasping the very words he said.

"A.. a date?" I look at him with a puzzled expression, feeling really happy yet really confused.

"If you want to say it bluntly.. then yea.." He blushed profusely, giving off a nervous chuckle.

"S-sure! I-I-I'd love to! Next Friday..?"

"5:00PM?" He replied.

"Sure... s-see you there."

I soon exit the dorm, jumping up and down as I skip to my own room in the Girls Division. Wow,

"Did I fall in love? Or did I just discover it?"