Chapter 9
Sunday afternoon between the lunch and dinner rushes, Shelby had her first playdate with Liddy. Shelby didn't know what to do and kept looking over at her dad. Luke suggested showing Liddy her toys. She led the other girl over to the coffee table but just like with Rachel, didn't like Liddy touching her toys.
"Why can't I play with your toys?" she asked Shelby.
Shelby replaced the toy she had just taken from Liddy, back in its place.
Finally, Luke called Liddy over, kneeling to her level. "Try asking first," he suggested in a whisper.
"Okay," she nodded and went back over to the coffee table. "Can I please play with your toys?"
Shelby stared down at the brown dinosaur-like creature wearing a skull on its head like a mask, and holding a bone that was molded against its tan stomach. It was actually a keychain like a few others she had but Shelby played with them all the same. She hesitated at first before stealing a look over at her dad, who gave her an encouraging smile and nodded. So, Shelby turned back to Liddy, shyly, and nodded, giving permission.
"Can I play with the butterfly?"
Shelby hesitated before reaching over to pick up the beanbag plushie of a blue-colored butterfly with big, red eyes and gave it to Liddy to play with.
Liddy flew it through the air above their heads.
Shelby rammed the dinosaur into the butterfly, knocking it out of her hand.
"That's not nice." Liddy picked up the butterfly and held it out to the dinosaur. In a different, gentle voice as if it was talking, she said, "That hurt. You should say you're sorry." Shelby answered by doing it again. "Now, stop that!" Liddy continued the voice. "You should play nice, Mister Dinosaur."
Shelby did it a third time.
Finally, Liddy got upset that time. "Shelby, stop it!" she cried in her normal speaking voice.
Luke came over. "Hey, what seems to be the problem?" He held his hands on his sides.
"Shelby keeps knocking the toy into mine," Liddy tattled.
He looked over to see Shelby holding her gaze to the floor, tensed up, and turned back to the other little girl. "Liddy, that's how Shelby normally plays. They battle one another."
"Why can't they just play nice?"
Luke turned back to Shelby. "Shell, can the Pokemons take a break from battling and just play with one another?"
She didn't respond or even lift her head.
"My brother watches this show. I've seen them play before," Liddy pointed out.
"Everyone needs a break to have fun, kiddo," Luke assured Shelby. After a moment, Shelby finally nodded. "Thank you, Shell." He waited, watching as she walked the toy over to the one Liddy had and held it to the butterfly as if it was hugging it. Luke smiled before returning to where he was working at the table.
The girls played for a hour. The talking was mainly one-sided. Luke couldn't help smile when Liddy slipped some encouragement into the play. Having a yellow, black striped, two-legged cat-like creature, also a keychain, tell an orange two-legged lizard with a flame on the end of its tail, that was a light-up toy, that it was okay to talk and they didn't have to be afraid.
"No one will make fun of you and if they do, they are dodo heads," she said, in a squeaky voice.
Shelby turned hers around so its back was facing Liddy's.
"What's wrong?"
She pointed it, slightly towards the table.
"It's okay. You don't have to be sad. We'll be friends even if you don't talk."
The lizard stole a peek at the cat-like creature before turning back to fully face it.
Luke had been watching for the past few minutes.
At that moment, Rachel came upstairs. "Liddy, your mom's here," she told the little girl.
"Awww," she moaned.
Luke stood up and wandered over to Rachel. "You can come back and play," he reminded her, grabbing Liddy's jacket from its hook. Liddy went over to slip her arms through as Luke suggested Shelby walk her guest downstairs.
Shelby stood up and joined the others. The four of them headed downstairs where Liddy's mother was waiting.
"Did you have fun?" she asked of her daughter.
"Yeah!" Liddy exploded with excitement. "Can Shelby come over to our house next time?"
Her mother glanced over at Luke, looking between them. "Well, that's up to Shelby's dad."
Luke shrugged, "Fine by me if Shelby wants to." He looked down at Shelby who didn't respond at all.
Shelby ended up, ambushed in a hug by Liddy before she left, when her mom told her to say thank you.
"Thank you for letting me play with your toys, Shelby." Shelby let her but did not hug back. Liddy switched over to Luke, hugging him around the legs. "Thank you for letting me come over and play with Shelby, Mister Luke."
"Any time, Liddy." He hugged the kid in return. They said their good-byes before leaving.
Once Liddy and her mom were gone, Luke lifted Shelby up onto his side. "Did you have fun, too?"
Shelby nodded which Luke gave her a reminder. "Yes," she said in a whisper.
"Would you like to do that again but at Liddy's house? I would drop you off for an afternoon like Liddy's mom did today and pick you up, afterwards."
Shelby looked away with just her eyes and shrugged.
The following Sunday afternoon Shelby did accept to give it a try. Luke didn't drop her off though. He stayed and talked with Liddy's parents.
Ten minutes had gone by before Liddy came down the stairs, stating Shelby wasn't playing with her. Luke headed up there to see what the problem was. He ended up finding Shelby leaning in the doorway, watching Liddy's brother play a Pokemon game on his TV, in his room.
Luke peeled Shelby away from the door frame and closed the door. "You're here for Liddy, not her brother, remember?" he reminded her.
Shelby nodded up at him since Liddy and her parents had followed Luke up there. Liddy led her down the hall to her bedroom so the adults could return downstairs. However, doing this made everyone realize how both girls had two completely different personalities. Shelby didn't want to do Barbie's hair, or play dress-up, or have a tea party. When Monday came, the two had ended up just sharing crayons together and that was about it. At least Liddy got Shelby out of the cupboard and sitting in her assigned seat.
Shortly after the friendship ended, though, it wasn't long before Shelby found someone else. Two boys who sat across from the girls at their table were discussing a topic that had caught Shelby's attention. They were twins who were named, Ethan and Alan, who were discussing where to find a certain Pokemon in the Gameboy game. Shelby knew where to find it but they didn't. She wanted to say something but couldn't. She finally decided to write the name of the location on the back of her worksheet and showed it to the boys. It was misspelled but they recognized it anyway. The next day, the boys had come to class, thanking Shelby and asked if she played the games, too.
That afternoon when Luke came to pick Shelby up from school, his legs got tackled. She then told him she had made some new friends. He couldn't believe it. Luke hadn't seen Shelby this excited yet and couldn't be any more happier. In fact, the twins and their parents had ended up stopping by the diner for dinner one night, and Shelby had her first link cable battle on her game.
Aside from Shelby making friends, Rachel also tried to get to know her daughter as well. She had read through the whole article and to Luke's surprise, was sticking to it just as he had. She even asked Shelby's permission to take her picture, beforehand. One would think that would be a good thing but it only made Luke worry more. He didn't even let Rachel be alone with Shelby and almost every time he saw Shelby start to make progress with her, he would call Shelby over, asking for her help or just to chat.
Even though Luke was glad Rachel was there and trying with Shelby, he couldn't help pull back. He hoped Shelby was enough to make her want to stay this time but there was also a part of him that reminded him, this was Rachel and she probably will leave. It was bad enough when it was just him. This time, if Shelby grew to know the woman and got attached, and Rachel were to leave...Luke didn't want to think of the outcome.
Rachel tried to offer to pick Shelby up from school a few times. Luke assured her it was all right, that he could do it. She tried to watch TV with her. Whenever Luke noticed, he would ask Rachel to help him downstairs.
"There was barely anyone down there, Luke. Caesar's down there with you," she told him.
"I know, but it might get packed any minute," Luke pointed out.
"Well, call me if it does. The dinner rush usually doesn't start until five."
Halfway into the third week, Shelby was playing with her toys at the coffee table while Luke was going over some business stuff at the kitchen table.
Rachel joined Shelby, asking first, which she nodded before going back to her play. She leaned her arms on her knees. "Which one's your favorite?"
Shelby picked up the lizard with the flame on the end of its tail, to show her.
"That one looks cool. What's his name?"
Shelby stared at it, silent.
Rachel waited patiently, not saying anything either.
A minute went by before Luke finally spoke up. "Shell, could you come here for a minute?"
Shelby set her toy down and made her way around the couch, walking over to where he sat.
Rachel sat there, saying nothing at first before she turned around to face Luke waiting to see what he wanted from their daughter, this time.
When Shelby was next to him, Luke lowered his head. "How you doing, kiddo?" he asked her, softly where only she could hear.
She shrugged.
"Is Rachel bothering you?"
Shelby looked back at Rachel, turning back around to shake her head.
"Are you sure? I can tell her to leave you alone if she's making you uncomfortable."
Rachel finally spoke up. "I thought you said we can't 'rescue' her, Luke?"
He looked over at her. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I think you do. Very well, actually," she argued.
"I was just checking on her, making sure she was okay."
"While I was talking with her, Luke." Rachel held a hand on the back of the couch.
Luke was trying to remain civil, mainly for his daughter, who was standing there, listening. But even though Rachel seemed to be trying to make things better, he couldn't help hold onto the anger he felt that this whole thing could have been avoided in the first place.
The first couple of weeks of Rachel's stay, Shelby's anxiety had remained in tact just as it had the first day. Whenever Rachel was around, she refused to leave Luke's side. But as the days continued, Shelby slowly grew used to having another person around the apartment, especially when Rachel had learned to be more nicer. Luke could see Rachel appear frustrated at times whenever Shelby didn't answer or shut her out. Rachel never lost it on the kid though which Luke was glad of. He was ready to react if she had though.
When Shelby made friends with Ethan and Alan, Rachel was also happy for the little girl, glad she was making friends. In fact, Luke caught her watching Shelby sitting with the boys.
"You know, she looks like you, but she's a little like me. Or, like when I was her age," she told him, behind the counter.
"How do you figure?" he asked.
"I've noticed Shelby's a tomboy. I went through a similar phase around her age," Rachel explained.
"Really." Luke looked between Rachel and Shelby.
"She plays in the dirt, doesn't she?"
"Yeah, why?"
Rachel smiled and looked over at Shelby, who was nodding her head at Ethan.
It was also Rachel who noticed Pikachu actually took batteries, who was sitting on the coffee table. Looking away from Luke, frustrated, Rachel stared at nothing when the toy had caught her eye and noticed his back could open.
"Shelby, does Pikachu take batteries?" she asked.
It was Luke who answered. "What are you talking about? It's just a stuffed animal."
Rachel looked back at him, still annoyed about what he had done and completely ignored him to look over at Shelby. "Does he?"
To Luke's surprise, Shelby nodded.
She reached over and picked up the yellow mouse, opening the back of the toy. Indeed, there was a compartment for batteries, with a speaker. Going through her bag, Rachel pulled out a couple of batteries and a small screwdriver, opening it.
Shelby came over with curiosity of what the woman was doing with her 'friend.' She watched as Rachel removed the old batteries that had come with the toy and replace them with new ones, closing the compartment afterwards and stuffed it back inside Pikachu.
Rachel looked the toy over, trying to figure out how to activate it, giving its stomach, a squeeze in a few places before trying Pikachu's front paws. At a press of his paw, Pikachu came to life, wiggling his long ears and moving his mouth, in and out as it said, Pika Pika! His red cheeks lit up as well.
Luke raised his eyebrows at hearing his daughter's favorite toy 'alive.' All this time he had no clue the toy could talk.
Shelby took the toy as it spoke on its own. Pi ka chu! It said in its actual voice from the show. It made a smile appear on her face and hugged the toy to her as it spoke a third time, its ears moving. Shelby looked up at Rachel, chewing on her lip and muttered, "tank you," barely audible.
Rachel smiled at her. "You're welcome, Shelby."
But so far those were the only two words Rachel heard from the kid.
That Saturday, Lorelai and Rory of course stopped by for breakfast. Lorelai and Luke had a semi argument about the eggs being on top of the pancakes before Luke took the plate into the kitchen and moved the eggs to the side. When he returned, Rachel was there, showing a photo of him, Lorelai and Shelby at the festival. Rachel had commented on Lorelai's eyes and asked Luke what he thought. He gave her a very awkward answer about her eyes being symmetrical. When he found out Lorelai was going to hang out with Rachel, later, Luke was a bit surprised considering they were different in personalities. When Shelby and Liddy learned they were different, that was the end of the friendship. Then again, didn't a kid have a different friend every week in kindergarten?
Shelby snuck downstairs just before Lorelai was about to leave, to head for the inn. Slipping passed everyone, cautiously, she made a dash over to Lorelai's table and removed her hat.
"Well, good morning, Shelby," Lorelai greeted, cheerfully. "Can I have a hug?"
Shelby hugged the woman with one arm, letting Lorelai hug her as well.
She continued to hold one arm around the kid. "What you got going on, today? Any fun plans?"
Shelby whispered into Lorelai's ear for only her to hear.
"That sounds fun," she smiled. "What are you and your friends gonna do?" Shelby whispered to her again. "Of course," Lorelai teased and gave Shelby a squeeze before letting her go.
That afternoon, while Rachel was out with Lorelai, the kids played up in the apartment, playing with the boys' Pokemon figurines, battling one another against Shelby's toys. Luke came up, periodically, to check on them and couldn't help notice how much fun Shelby was especially having even if no words came out of her mouth.
Rachel returned while the boys were still there so she took the opportunity while Shelby was distracted, to talk to Luke, downstairs.
"I've been doing a lot of thinking, Luke, and I know I've said it plenty of times before," she began.
Luke was only half paying attention to her as he wiped down the counter. Rachel was trying the I'm ready to settle down speech on him again.
"Look, what I did, giving up Shelby when she was born, that was a mistake. I see that now. She's a great kid and I wish I could take it back but I can't. What I can do is be there for her now."
Luke stopped, mid-wipe, and looked over at her before continuing to wipe down the counter.
"What I'm saying is, getting to spend some time with Shelby these past couple of weeks made me realize I do want to settle down and put down roots. In fact, need to actually."
Luke moved on to wiping down tables. "You've told me that before, Rachel."
She followed closely behind him. "Yes, and I have given you no reason to believe me now, but...that was before…"
He plainly said, "no," and moved onto another table.
"Luke, how can I fully get to know Shelby if you won't let me get close to her. I can't hold a conversation with her without you pulling her away. I want to apologize but I can't without telling Shelby who I am. Can I please tell her?"
"I said no, Rachel," he snapped. "I'm not gonna let you fill my daughter's head with empty promises and break her little heart when I know you're just going to leave again."
"I swear I mean it, this time."
"That's what you always say. Then you leave without even a good-bye. I can accept that, but Shelby is five years old. She won't, not after the crap she went through in foster care," he had stopped and was facing Rachel. Luke was glad the diner was empty of customers.
"I understand, Luke. Believe me. I don't like that Shelby had a rough start either and I know it's because of me. That's why I want to make things better. I am ready to be a mom."
He stared at her in utter displeasure. "You're ready?" he questioned.
"Yes," she nodded at him.
"You're ready?"
"I told you, yes."
"You're ready?"
Rachel shrugged in confusion. "Yes, Luke, I am. How many times do I need to say it?"
His heart began thumping inside his chest so hard Luke could hear it in his ears. "Was I ready when I got the phone call? Was I ready when the judge granted me full custody? Was I ready when I brought her home?" he didn't let her answer. "No, Rachel, I wasn't. I wasn't ready. But I did it anyways. Because that is my kid," Luke pointed upstairs. "That's called parenthood. Its stepping up the first moment you learn you're a parent, not having any second thoughts. Shelby should never have been in foster care when there are kids out there in more need of her spot. And, you know what else?"
Rachel shook her head. "I'm sorry, Luke. I don't…"
"I might even have accepted it if you had dropped her off here instead. Might. But instead you gave her to strangers. Strangers, Rachel! And did not even tell me, her father."
Rachel took in a deep breath, letting it out. "What do you want me to say, Luke?" she asked of him. "I messed up. I can't change the past, but I can help fix it now. I really mean it this time. I want to be a part of Shelby's life. I do. I won't abandon her again. I promise."
Luke aggressively rubbed at a dried-on food spot, squirting at it with a cleaning solution.
"I'm not even gonna make excuses, Luke. Let me show you I'm willing to stay this time."
Luke moved onto to the next table, not budging at all. He hardened his heart to not give in to her. Every time, she gave him the same speech and each time she took off. Luke wanted to believe Rachel, he really did. But he knew better and Luke wanted to protect Shelby as much as he possibly could.
Thankfully, the argument was cut short when the twins' dad came by the diner to pick up his boys. Luke led him upstairs.
"Boys, your dad's here," he announced when they walked in. There was a moan from the boys and a frowny face from Shelby. The kids were on the couch with Shelby in the middle, playing her game. Her body was molded in a ball with her knees pointed towards the ceiling. It was clear she was uncomfortable but either Shelby couldn't say anything or she really didn't care. Either way she did not want the boys to leave.
Like with Liddy, Shelby had to walk her guests out, saying bye at the entrance to the diner. After they left, Shelby turned around without looking up first and hugged Rachel's leg. She quickly looked up and jolted backwards, tearing up, fast as she froze.
Luke noticed and went over to lift her on his side. "What's wrong, kiddo?" he rubbed her back, up and down as Shelby buried her face in his shoulder. Her face was bright red. When it seemed like Shelby wasn't going to respond, Luke took her upstairs for some privacy.
He sat on the end of his bed and placed Shelby on his leg. She refused to look up though. Every time Luke tried to lift her off his chest, Shelby would rebury it.
"What happened, Shell? Talk to me. We're alone here. I told Rachel to stay downstairs so she can't hear you." Luke continued to rub her back as Shelby held his shirt in a firm grip. Her tiny body was so tense it was actually starting to worry him. So Luke focused on lowering her anxiety first, rubbing her back and side. It was a long while before the anxiety went down and Luke began to feel her start to relax.
When he was sure everything was fine, Luke again asked . "What happened, kiddo?" He combed her hair, pushing it behind her ear.
Shelby chewed on her lip, staring at nothing in particular. Finally she answered, in a soft scared voice, "I tot i' was you."
"You thought Rachel was me?" he repeated, making sure he heard right.
"Yes." Her voice cracked.
"That's okay, kiddo. We all make mistakes." Come to think about it, Shelby latched on to Rachel before she was completely turned around. Luke repeatedly rubbed her upper arm, affectionately. "You got scared, huh?"
Shelby nodded. "I no know where you were."
"I'm sorry, kiddo." He leaned over and kissed the top of her head, squeezing Shelby to him.
Shelby finally looked up her dad.
He smiled for her. "Are you okay now?"
She nodded. "Uh huh."
"How do you feel about Rachel?" he asked, curious.
Shelby looked away at the floor.
"It's okay, sweetheart. You can say whatever is on your mind. Good or bad, just long's you're honest."
She still hesitated at first but after a minute or two of silence, said, "See okay, I guess."
"Rachel's okay?" he asked, finding her wording amusing.
"Ray-kul go' be'ter."
Luke had to force himself to keep smiling, hoping Rachel wasn't growing on the kid to the point there would be an attachment.
"Do you like Rachel?"
She just shrugged one shoulder.
Luke decided to change the subject. "Did you have fun with Alan and Ethan?"
Shelby perked up a little at the mention of her new friends. "We played ba'tles and we played my Gameboy. Etan likes you picked Squir'le."
"Yeah," he smiled, "I made a good choice?"
Shelby nodded. "I beat the five gym." Luke knew she meant the fifth gym. He also knew she had beaten the game, several times already.
"That's great, kiddo." The kid was now beaming from ear to ear as she stared up at him. It was amazing how much he alone could get her from her anxiety to calm, relaxed, and happy again. Shelby had come a long way in such a short time and it was so rewarding to see the progress she was making. Her teacher helped as much as possible too, along with the other kids. Shelby was made a head of cabbage in the play that was to be put on, Friday afternoon, in their classroom for the students' family and friends. Shelby learned that when she went to school on Monday and on the way home, asked her dad if she could invite Lorelai to come see it.
"You can ask her," he told her, kneeled at her level. They stopped inside Taylor's market, to pick up a few things before heading upstairs. Lorelai was sitting there on the couch, much to Luke's surprise. "What are you doing here?"
"Rachel invited me.
"Oh," he replied.
"To look at some pictures."
"Good."
"Yeah, and go through your underwear drawer," she teased him.
Luke had slid his hands into his pockets. "Where is she?" he asked.
"Freezing your bra."
He looked at her confused what she meant by that. "Where?"
"The bathroom."
"Right," he nodded and headed over to his safe.
Shelby hurried over to plop herself down next to the woman, removing her hat.
"Hey, sweetheart. How was school?"
She shrugged.
Luke knelt in front of the safe, turning the dial. He looked over at the two and knew Shelby wanted to ask but couldn't get the words out. Not when Rachel was in the other room.
"It's a nice place you have here," Lorelai complimented him, holding an arm around the kid.
He thanked her, a little uncomfortable himself.
"I like the curtains," she stared over at them.
"Yeah, yeah, Rachel...picked them out." Out of the corner of his eye, Luke noticed Lorelai look down at Shelby and after a short moment, they were giggling, though he could only hear Lorelai's.
Rachel appeared from the bathroom. "Oh, hi," she greeted him and noticed Shelby there. "Hey there, Shelby." Shelby latched onto Lorelai, to hide her face. Since the incident, even after Luke assured her it was alright, Shelby still felt embarrassed around the woman. Rachel had even tried to make her feel better about it.
Rachel must have told Lorelai about the incident as she comforted the little girl. The women took the focus off of Shelby to help ease her anxiety by picking on Luke before he decided to head back downstairs. Shelby eventually hurried after him and buried her face in his leg.
Luke felt a spot on his pants get wet. "What's wrong, Shell?" he asked, making a fresh batch of coffee. He had thought it was tears that was wetting his leg but when he lifted Shelby up onto his side, Luke saw it wasn't just tears. Blood was leaking from her nose. "Aw, jeez." He set her on the counter and grabbed his cleaning rag since it was the closest thing he could find on short notice and held it on her nose. Using his other hand, Luke pinched the bridge of her nose.
Shelby tried to push the hand pinching her nose away.
"No, kiddo. I have to pinch your nose to stop the bleeding."
She kept pushing but her dad refused to let go until her nose stopped bleeding after a couple minutes. Luke took the rag away, leaning over to check. Her nose was a little bruised up and one had formed on her forehead.
"What happened, Shell?" he asked, gently.
"The table made me fall," she replied, softly in his ear.
Luke smirked. "The table made you fall?"
Shelby nodded. "And the floor hi' my nose."
"Did they now?" he went along with it. "Should I go beat up the table and floor?"
Lorelai came downstairs at that point. "You okay, sweetheart?"
"Yes," she replied, softly, which Luke repeated to Lorelai.
"Should probably put ice on her nose," she suggested. "It'll help with the bruising."
"Right." Luke headed into the kitchen and grabbed a package of frozen vegetables from the walk-in freezer, wrapping it in a clean rag and pressed it against her nose. "Hold it, kiddo."
"I' too cold," Shelby protested, softly, pushing the vegetables away from her face.
"It'll help numb your nose and make it feel better, sweetie," Lorelai assured her.
Shelby still refused the 'ice pack.'
"If you let your dad put ice on your nose, I'll buy you a treat from Doose's market," she bribed which Luke questioned about. "You have to offer a kid a reward."
"By bribing them?"
"Come on, Luke. The kid just got hurt. Treats are supposed to help make them feel better."
It had worked too. Shelby had taken the vegetables from him and was holding it on her nose, wincing from the cold. Luke made sure the rag was between her bare skin and the frozen packaging. They waited ten minutes which he offered Lorelai some coffee while they waited. Afterwards, Luke let her take Shelby next door to pick out a treat. He expected Shelby to pick out candy or another pop tart. Instead, she picked out a small bag of Doritos, already starting on them when the girls returned.
Letting Shelby eat them at one of the tables, Luke headed into the back where the storage room was, to unbox a latest shipment order and take inventory.
Lorelai had followed behind. "So… This the fascinating storage area where fascinating acts of storage take place."
"Yep," he replied, setting a large jar of pickles on the shelf.
"Some good-looking pickles," she complimented.
Luke stopped to look at her. "What are you doing?"
"I'm admiring your pickles."
He grabbed another jar to set on the shelf. "You shouldn't be in here."
Lorelai shrugged, "Why not?"
"My insurance only covers me."
"That's not true. You're kidding, right?" Lorelai looked around the room.
Luke stopped unboxing to explain, "It's not safe, something might fall. Shelby's not even allowed back here."
"You don't like me hanging out with Rachel, do you?"
He stopped a third time, to look at the woman. "Oh, come on."
"Am I right?"
"You can hang out with anybody you want," he argued.
"Not my question."
Luke turned around, grabbing the box as he said, "Well, that's my answer," and tossed it onto the floor. Luke moved to the other side of the table, to open another box.
"Well, we're eight," she said.
"Just a friendly piece of advice," he pointed out, "don't get too attached to her." Luke cut into another box with a boxcutter.
"Rachel?"
"Yeah, she's got an interesting habit of getting bored and leaving, usually without saying good-bye." Luke ripped the box open with his hands, struggling just a tad.
"People break habits," she pointed out.
"Not often."
"Shelby's doing well, breaking hers, I've noticed."
"Yeah, well, she doesn't get that from Rachel."
"So, you're just convinced that's what she's gonna do," said Lorelai.
"I'll bet ya that's exactly what she does." Luke had finally gotten the box open and moved the set of pickle jars onto the shelf behind him.
"Well, let's say it is what she does. Don't you think there's the tiniest possibility if Rachel leaves Stars Hollow this time, it's because she thinks you don't want her to stay?"
Luke stopped and stared over at her at once, placing his hands on his sides. "Are you two talking about me?" he questioned of her.
"No," Lorelai shook her head but quickly grinned, "yes."
He straightened up as he said, "Okay, I don't mind you hanging out with her, but you will not talk about me."
"Why?" she questioned. "It's fun. We wear plaid, take turns not shaving." Lorelai took a drink of her coffee.
"There will be no Luke talk, period," he laid down the law and continued moving the jars.
"Do you want to know what I think about the situation?"
"Nope." Luke finally finished with that box as well, tossing that one away next.
"Are you sure?"
"Look, if you're gonna tell me at least help me unload." He pushed a box towards her before opening one in front of him.
She stepped towards the table. "Can I use the fun cutter thingy?"
Luke ripped his box open before he told her, "Not if you call it the fun cutter thingy."
"Please?" she begged, nicely.
He held it out to her with the blade pointed down. "Cut the box, not your hand."
Lorelai took it from him. "Good tip. You should teach." She ripped into the box. "Ha! Fun."
"Talk," he reminded her.
"Well, I don't know what's going on in Rachel's head because I'm not a Vulcan. But from the way she talks about you and Shelby, and the way she smiles when your name comes up. I'm pretty sure that she's serious about staying in Stars Hollow, this time."
"Let me guess," he said, now unboxing cans of broth onto the shelf, "Rachel told you she wanted to put down roots, that she's serious this time, and that she's tired of the road and realizes what's lacking in her nomadic existence."
"She didn't use the phase, nomadic existence, but basically yes, that's what she said." Lorelai was now loading containers of mustard onto the shelf across from him.
"I've heard the speech. I know the speech by heart. The only difference this time was she added she was ready to be Shelby's mother."
"Well, I think she means it this time."
"You don't know her like I do," he argued.
"I-I don't, but she seems sincere."
Luke paused in confusion and stared over at her, placing his hands on his sides again. "How do you know?"
Lorelai froze in place. "Her nose didn't grow," she glanced away with her eyes.
"Why are you taking her side?"
Lorelai let go of the container she had been holding onto. "I'm not taking her side," she argued, defensively.
"Well, it sounds like you're taking her side," he raised his voice a little.
"Well, wash out your ears. I'm not taking her side."
He pointed at himself, "I mean, you're practically pushing her on me."
"I just want you to be happy," she assured him
"And you know what makes me happy?"
Lorelai glanced off to the side. "No, I just know that you've been carrying a torch for her for a really long time."
Luke leaned his hands on the table, "I have not been carrying a torch for her," he denied.
"Well, you wanted this to happen."
He stood up and asked, defensively, "How do you know what I wanted to happen?"
"Didn't you?"
Luke stared at her for a split second before turning away, caught. "Yeah, I guess." It was stupid, yes but he did care about the woman at one point.
"Okay. So, here it is, right in front of you," she pointed out. "Just take it. Take the plunge. She could be ready."
Luke looked up at her.
"Just jump in and believe her." Lorelai dropped her gaze. "Unless…" she paused, "you know… there's some other reason you don't want to."
He looked up again. There was actually two reasons Luke didn't want to but it wasn't like he could boldly admit to one of them. "Like what?"
"Like...I don't know." Lorelai fidgeted with the box.
"There's Shelby to think of," he admitted one of the reasons to her. The easiest one. "I can't let Shelby get attached to someone who's gonna hurt her in the end." Luke dropped his gaze towards the table again.
"You can't always protect her from getting hurt," she told him, gently.
He glanced at her. "I can try."
"No, Luke, you can't. Shelby has to know there are risks in life when putting her heart out there. If she doesn't learn that now, it'll be harder when she's older."
Luke stared down at the table. He couldn't help wince at the thought of Shelby meeting her first love and break-up. It was bad enough she had fallen upstairs earlier and he wasn't there to catch her.
"I never wanted Rory to get hurt either but I knew it would happen eventually like it did with Dean. As much as I really wanted to protect her I knew I couldn't. She's gonna be on her own soon, away at college without me."
"Shelby has been through too much already, how can I put one more risk on her?"
"It's her mother, Luke. Shelby deserves to know."
"She doesn't deserve a mother who would walk out on her, again," he pointed out, irritably.
"Doesn't mean you close the door."
"What door?"
"I always kept the door open for Rory's father. It had to be his idea whether or not to use it," she explained, "regardless if he chooses not to."
Luke looked away.
"What if Shelby asks about Rachel when she's older and Shelby finds out she met her once but you never told her? She'll be devastated."
"I'll tell her, it was for the best, that I was looking out for her," he said.
But Lorelai shook her head. "Shelby won't see it that way. At least not at first. She'll be upset that she got to meet her mom but didn't know it. You can't keep the connection blocked no matter how upset you are towards Rachel. She'll always be her mother whether you like it or not."
The room grew silent as Lorelai's words sunk in. The two continued unloading for a moment until Luke finally stated he would think about it. Lorelai finished the box and thanked him for letting her use his boxcutter and left.
Luke stared after her. Even though he didn't want his daughter to get hurt, Luke really would have liked if she knew who her mother was. A kid did need both a mom and a dad.
