IX.
Sanji probably thought he was being smart or witty or something and was probably making up some kind of story, but Zoro didn't see anything but him being a moron. Obviously this chick, Robin or whatever she was saying her name was, knew a lot more than she was putting on. Granted, Sanji was in a tough spot, he had let his guard down at work since no one knew Zoro here, but now that there was someone who apparently knew him and things didn't add up, it really screwed him over.
But he was over thinking it, in Zoro's opinion. It was such an easy thing to shrug off as being personal. He was a host, but he didn't owe Robin any answers, he didn't need to explain anything, just do his job - the reason they were here for. Zoro was discovering, however, that just wasn't Sanji. Even if he didn't want to be, Sanji was a social guy, especially with the ladies. He couldn't help but feel entitled and like he had to respond.
Stupid cook, the least he could do is listen to Zoro for once for guidance. Yeah, they had an average score of getting along fifty-fifty, but there were perks to having someone invisible around. But not once when Sanji's eyes glanced in Zoro's direction were they asking for assistance. If anything, he wanted him to stay off to the side and sit still like he'd been forced to do for far too long.
Well it was a good thing Zoro naturally felt like fucking Sanji's stuff up.
"Oi, do not talk." Zoro looked over at Sanji, watching his expression slightly change. It was all he needed to know that Sanji could hear him. "Learn Japanese." It would help.
Sanji's eye strayed over to him when Zoro turned to the side, but he would quickly leave his vision as Zoro hunched down beside him in a battle ready position, about to whisper into his ear. He made a gesture in the way he nodded toward Robin.
Hopefully this would be enough to get Sanji to understand the plan he wanted to take, because they couldn't afford Sanji babbling crazy stuff. What they were going to tell her they had to decide together, somehow.
"Why." he said, not asked, pointing in the direction of Robin.
He himself wanted to know why she'd have a fan book like that, how she would know so many things about them. He thought, for sure, having been the one out of them both who couldn't do anything but watch the customers around here, that he would've seen her before if she was truly a frequent customer. She wasn't, which made it ten times more suspicious.
Zoro listened to the way Sanji's breathing slightly changed and he went into pondering how to word it. It shouldn't be too hard to just ask what Zoro said, but it probably needed to sound somewhat casual and not like he was being fed lines. That, or the shit cook was about to outright ignore him, which would be stupid.
"Robin-chan, you hurt my feelings." Zoro watched as Sanji relaxed. Feelings? Like romance? What did that have to do with this stuff? Damn love cook! "Why would you want to know about him? We could talk about you instead."
Well at least Zoro got to hear the word he wanted used. Except, he also understood what Sanji was saying was in reference to himself and it made him hiss. Damn moron, was he trying to confirm to her that he was crazy? Granted, coming off as crazy to some random chick probably wouldn't be too bad, but someone like her who had vibes and easily could tell Zoro was hanging around... definitely didn't need to know.
Robin's eyebrow peaked from across the bar, most likely because Sanji had hinted at Zoro's existence. "I'm sure people like you and I have been saying things about ourselves all day, isn't it only fair we give the underdog a chance? Are you keeping him to yourself?"
Zoro furrowed his eyebrows. Dog? He could've sworn he just heard the word dog and unfortunately that's what his mind focused on, since it was the part that confused him the most. He was not dog-like and if Sanji agreed that he was, Zoro would kick his ass.
"Well, as my friend he is my responsibility. He's the real national treasure, I have to protect him. Isn't that right, Marimo?"
Zoro froze when Sanji glanced over at him, as if a spot light had found him in a crowd. It felt stupid, since no one could see him regardless and Sanji was 'playing' like an imaginary him was really there or something, but still it ticked him off. What was Sanji doing now? What happened to killing this conversation off and shutting her suspicions down?! And who was whose responsibility, since it seemed like Zoro and his body were helping out Sanji more than anything these days.
"Respon. responsi. Tch, bastard." This wasn't a joke, this was their lives at the moment!
Sanji looked like how he probably felt, crafty and clever. Except, if Zoro's analysis was correct, he'd just gone and given away that Zoro had moved from where he'd been earlier. Most people wouldn't care about that, but Zoro was trying to get in the head of his knowledgeable opponent - who in this case was Robin. He didn't know her personally, but something told him that she would be the person to notice and the curiosity in her brow was enough to confirm it. Was it Sanji's weakness to women that made him blind to something like this? Surely not if he stared at women all day like the pervert he was.
Sanji had been watching him for a moment, but then he turned back to Robin, to spew more crap, of course. "I apologize, he gets a bit jealous."
There was a vein pulsating on Zoro's forehead. Who was jealous of whom? Sanji was delusional, Zoro had no reason to be jealous of anyone. Damn, could he glare any harder? Zoro was definitely trying to. Curse this situation forcing him out of participating in this conversation. Zoro rose to his feet, glowering down at Sanji.
"You-! No thank you!" He was using one of the phrases from the English DVDs. He knew it was probably a more polite thing to say, but it was all he had in this kind of situation where his words were limited.
It didn't help that he didn't miss the poor attempt at hiding a chuckle from Sanji's side of the conversation. Sanji was doing this on purpose now, wasn't he? They had someone snooping around and all he wanted to do was play around?
"You shouldn't tease him too much, Zoro-san. It's not his fault he can't be seen, is it?"
They were entering the danger zone. Insert flashing lights here.
"Oi, Sanji." Zoro gritted his teeth.
His eyes were closed now and he was trying to remember what he should know from his DVDs that he could use to fully express what he wanted to toward Sanji. Except, all they covered were the bare basics and how to find the toilet. Ah, the bathroom. That was it. Without thinking, Zoro's eyes opened and he pointed toward Sanji, gathering a half glance.
"Excuse me, where is the toilet? Go pee," he growled, then crossed his arms in an 'x' shape. "Time out."
Sanji's forced disinterest in this idea made Zoro sigh irritably. So he didn't want to listen to Zoro's advice on that, or to use his idea to sneak off to the bathroom and plan something... This better be good, whatever it was he was trying to get at.
"Not necessarily. Haven't you ever wanted to reinvent yourself, Robin-chan? Put your old self behind you and become someone new?"
The Robin-chick's smile changed, fading lightly. Her eyes were back at the fanbook, where no doubt Zoro mentioned his dream. "That's an impressive lie, Zoro. I didn't realize your ambitions were so easily put aside."
Zoro's eyes were drilling into Sanji. This guy had a way of unraveling all the things he'd been working toward his whole life and, from an outsider's perspective, maybe it did seem like Sanji was pulling Zoro away from those things. But Zoro could tell, knowing his facial features better than anyone, Sanji's masked discomfort at whatever Robin was getting at. What was she saying to him to make him that uncomfortable and why did it light a fire in the pit of Zoro's stomach? Maybe because Sanji was in his body, he felt he was also the one on the chopping block?
Although Sanji was stubborn, talkative and hard to get through or plan things with, Zoro wanted to believe that Sanji's intentions and what he said when he represented them both wasn't anything that would clash with Zoro's own beliefs. So maybe, because of that, Zoro was a bit protective and easily cross when someone was making Sanji that uncomfortable, since it would probably make him feel the same. Maybe. Well, that's the explanation he was going with this time, at least.
"They aren't. Those am... My ambitions mean everything to me." Sanji's voice changed slightly, enough for probably only Zoro to notice. But he wasn't sure what they were referring to. Ambitions? This is a word he would need to ask about again later. "My temporary cultural exchange is nothing but another challenge toward them."
Robin's finger was now tracing along the rim of her glass, but soon she retreated her hand back to get to her handbag. "Perhaps, instead of a challenge or a test," she began, fetching out her wallet, "you're beneficial to your friend's success? Ah, I apologize, your success."
She was apologizing about something. What did she know, what had she said? Zoro's knuckles were pale, they were clasped so tight, though any movement with them would be nothing but useless. At least it seemed like she was getting together her things and preparing to leave.
The idiot, Sanji, regardless of being insulted or put into a tight spot, got into place and took her empty glass. Robin wore her generic smile, the one Zoro wasn't sure meant anything at all, and slid the fan book she'd brought over to Sanji, on top of it an envelope with what he assumed was her payment. Why she had to keep it in an envelope, Zoro wasn't sure, maybe it was a foreigner thing or personal preference.
"You should keep this, it will help you study." Robin's voice was calmer now as well, things felt less like an interrogation. Her eyes were back to staring straight into Sanji's, however. "Thank you for the conversation. Next time I hope I'll meet you."
Zoro's eyes moved back from her's to Sanji. Meet you? Why else would she say that in that way, while staring right into Sanji's eyes, if she didn't know anything? She'd technically already met Zoro, there was only one other person she could meet and hear about, which would be Sanji. Thus, she knew. She was already speculating there was someone else in Zoro's body. Damn, this is exactly what Zoro wanted to avoid, it would just bring more problems.
It didn't help that Sanji seemed to only now understand it and stand there like an idiot with a fan book and envelope in his hand while she walked away. Shit cook, he had his chance and although he held a conversation with her, he practically just gave information when they needed to obtain it. Before Sanji could even look to him or say anything, Zoro was on the move, following Robin out while she headed toward the club's exit.
She must've been a regular like she'd said, since some of the other hosts here waved her off, but that was for another day's curiosity. Zoro followed her out into the streets, illuminated by all the lights of this district. Her posture was calm, she wasn't the least bit bothered, it would seem, about what happened. If anything, she seemed satisfied. As if they'd played right into what she had wanted to hear. That rubbed Zoro the wrong way even more. If he could, he would've grabbed her arm and forced her to explain herself.
Sanji would kill him for even thinking of grabbing her wrist, but Zoro couldn't focus on what he 'would' be upset about, his vision was more focused on what had already upset him. It wasn't like stalking her as a ghost would do much good, there was a strong doubt Robin would contemplate things out loud for Zoro to overhear, but he couldn't do nothing.
"Oi!" he yelled, everyone in the streets and Robin herself not stopping or looking his way. "Stop!"
He was almost right beside her, not paying attention to the other people he fazed through or even the corner of a building.
"Robin!"
Zoro's chest tightened when she slowly came to a halt after he had called her name. There was a tiny hope that spread across him. Had she heard him? He moved in closer, watching as she slowly turned around and surveyed that on this street it was just the two of them, or rather to her sights just herself.
Taking a deep, composed breath, Zoro was standing right in front of her, his arms crossed as he stared into her eyes. No wonder Sanji had easily been captivated by them and said whatever she liked, it was a good thing Zoro was resistant to it in more ways than one.
"Who..." he growled out. It was important that he asked the biggest question on his mind first, versus the one he wanted to know for personal reasons about Sanji. "Are you?"
Robin's eyes widened slightly, but then settled and her smile returned. She must've known exactly who she had heard.
"Zoro. It's not nice to follow a lady home."
He remained silent.
"There's no reason to be worried. I won't tease him about you again."
Tease him about Zoro? Wait... was that... that wasn't what he came to make sure she understood. He just wanted her to back off. But why, in some way, did it feel like the same thing in these circumstances? Was Zoro being protective of their situation or just about Sanji? The guy had been through a lot, just like him, maybe even a little worse... No. He refused to believe that was the case, simply because it meant she would be right in profiling him when she'd never even spoken to him before. Zoro would not be so easily read when he wasn't able to adequately be himself.
That was more easily decided than done, however. His jaw clenched, feeling Sanji's discomfort still fresh in his mind, he regretfully shoved his anger off his shoulders. Out of the two things bothering him, he couldn't help that currently one was out bothering the other and relief that it might be settled was better than nothing.
"Thank you," he spat, turning around to walk back, not caring if Robin went back on her merry way or not.
It wasn't until he circled the host club a few times and found the door that he realized. How had she heard him? She did, didn't she, or was she just that intuitive to expect him to come if he was really there? Dammit, he hated games like this shit!
-0-
Sanji was nearly done cleaning up and putting things up for the night at the bar when Zoro finally returned, his cheeks a bit flushed, but overall still grumpy as he had been when he followed Robin out. Sanji hadn't expected him to be so responsive to the conversation with her, but he understood why he might be. It was alarming that someone knew and guessed so much about them so easily. It was similar to if they'd been messed around with, but Sanji wasn't taking it to heart, it wasn't that bad. He felt like even if he did give some information, it wasn't information she could really do too much with, just enough to humor her.
"Where the hell did you go?" he hissed, not looking up while wiping down the bar, knowing Zoro was standing close and watching.
There was a pause, which almost prompted Sanji to look and make sure everything was okay, but Zoro didn't keep him waiting too long.
"Cat woman."
Sanji had to pause moving his dish towel in circles just to huff out a laugh. This guy, were they going to meet the whole Batman cast during this adventure? As much as Sanji wouldn't mind seeing Robin in a catsuit, he wasn't sure if she should be labeled as a character known for constantly switching sides. Though, perhaps, if she was fueled by her own curiosity, it would make sense.
Sanji stepped back and looked at his work, tossing his towel toward the sink. Pursuing his lips, he just couldn't feel totally calm yet. There was a part of him that he didn't like that felt like he needed to say a certain something to Zoro. Like an apology. But at the same time, half of him really didn't want to apologize and feel bad for the way he had acted. The image of a ticked off Zoro telling him 'no thank you' was cherishable. Instead, he reached out to take hold of the fanbook Robin had left them to go through. He thumbed through it until he found the page where a Marimo scowl was staring up at him.
"I knew you liked swords, but you're in a fanbook?" He made sure the look he gave Zoro was quizzical enough. "I'm not going to have to start signing autographs, am I?"
Zoro seemed to be thinking about other things. He was delayed looking away from Sanji's face to the book in question and when he understood what he must be talking about, Zoro just shrugged and looked back to the empty cup with an umbrella in it.
Damn. The urge to apologize was for some reason becoming stronger, so much, in fact, that the words were traveling up Sanji's throat. He looked down towards the envelope and picked it up next.
"In good news though, Marimo..." He shot Zoro a look, hoping maybe a new nickname would get his attention, but it was no use. Oh well, he was still going to use it. "She left a huge tip. I don't think I would mind telling her my life story if it meant more of this. We'd be back to normal so fast…"
"No." Zoro looked up from the cup, eyeing the rest of the place where others were beginning the nightly clean up. "Do not."
It was odd, mostly because even in only two words, Zoro managed to have Sanji feeling guilty and a little dumbfounded. That was the first real time, where it actually felt legit, that Zoro disagreed with something Sanji suggested, on a different level than him just trying to provoke Sanji.
Silently, Sanji placed the envelope into the fanbook and set it down, leaving to find his jacket. It would be another awkward walk home this evening, it seemed, not that walking back to Zoro's apartment in silence every night wasn't awkward enough. It was when he was finally done and ready to head out that Zoro stood in his path once more. Still troubled, but it seemed he knew what he wanted to ask now.
"Ambition." Zoro's face was for the most part emotionless, but his glare wasn't going to budge or let Sanji's stray off. "What... is ambition?"
Ambition? It seemed like such a random word to ask, but at the same time, it wasn't. Obviously, Zoro had been listening into Sanji's conversation with Robin very closely, was probably trying to understand the most of it that he could, but it was unfair to expect him to understand all of it. When the topic went to ambitions was the point where the atmosphere went uncomfortable, for Sanji at least. He would imagine that must've translated into a tummy ache or something for Zoro.
Still, that didn't make it a strange and weird word to try and explain either. He could've just went for his translation dictionary, see if there was a word in Japanese that could let him know what it meant, but Sanji didn't feel like it. He was drained from trying to explain anything after answering questions all day - from regular customers and from Robin.
"Ambition is like…" Sanji studied Zoro's face. It was strange to find comfort in taking it in while trying to search for the right words to say. Something to do with the way it was the real, original model to this body that knew how to use its expressions best, probably. Or maybe it was something else, something stupid like speaking face to face to him in public, not while they were hidden away in the apartment. "Your dream to be the very best."
Sanji watched Zoro turn his face away, his eyebrows furrowing. He was expecting him to say something now that he realized what Sanji was saying to Robin and vice versa, but instead he glared when Zoro chuckled and raised an eyebrow at him.
"Pokemon?"
Poke- what. "Tch, asshole, that's in the English theme song, how do you even- forget it. You watch too many trivia shows during the day."
Sanji would just have to hope he understood what he had said and that the random joke was to let him know he understood things now. They traveled back to the apartment in silence as per usual, stopping only to grab some groceries before heading in.
As mysteriously tasty and convenient the corner store rice balls were, Sanji was understandably missing being in the kitchen and actually cooking food. For the last week he'd been trying to do it instead of buying food, but Zoro's kitchen proved to be a challenge in itself. The guy hardly had any of the appropriate and required cookware to actually use it.
But it wasn't like Sanji wasn't ready to face his own hurdles for his passion. Thanks to finally having access to the computer, he was able to find new recipes, focusing on the Japanese variety. He figured, if he was here for awhile, why shouldn't he use it as a time to experience what it could offer him in his own success.
Zoro, unable to physically eat it himself never seemed that interested and Sanji couldn't blame him. Hell, he wasn't even sure he could smell right now, so food was probably something bitter sweet, especially if it looked as good as Sanji's. Not that he should get ahead of himself and feel too confident. The wound of breaking a prep table with a single cut using Zoro's hand carelessly, making his skills look like a joke, was still very fresh in his mind. He would have to be careful.
Although he wasn't usually interested, Sanji still sometimes got a random annoying urge to try and make it interesting, trying to gauge Zoro's attention - sometimes it worked and he would watch, but other times he just kept staring at his DVDs. By now, shouldn't he have mastered those?
After crafting a delicious meal for himself - though now that he was getting a good look at it, it might be better suitable to his old portion sizes compared to the ones Zoro's body should maintain - Sanji moved to the table in their room and pulled up the laptop onto it with him. It was becoming a habit to check his Facebook while he ate dinner and see what was going on back home.
Sometimes there were status updates, though they really just confirmed nothing had changed, other times there were photos which made Sanji feel the most out of place. His poor face back home, his facial hair a hot mess, there would be a lot of work to do there when he finally returned to it. But today, after the thing with Robin he was still feeling a little guilty about, Sanji decided to end his Facebook stalking early and do something else.
Another thing he was trying to understand was Google translate. It was a gamble, since the damn thing loved to fuck up what he wanted to tell Zoro and give him a lot of strange looks, but it did give hope to helping them. Sometimes, things were just too hard or exhausting to attempt explaining through their language barrier. He checked the word Yaoi, only to find Yaoi means yaoi, before retreating further online. Bad idea.
"Oi, Marimo," he called out, using that nickname again. See, he was going to keep using it regardless.
And this time, like a pleasant surprise, its intended effect worked and Zoro grunted at where he was laying across the floor and looked over at Sanji. He wasn't amused, but at least he understood his new name.
"Seriously? This is Yaoi?" Sanji growled between his teeth, turning over the Google image result, his face growing ever warmer.
Sanji would like to say he'd never been so embarrassed in his life, but unfortunately this didn't take the cake… until he remembered all the times he'd used the term. Dammit, he could never trust this asshole, ever again. It didn't mean beautiful ladies at all. Just looking at the Google images told him enough it was something to do with gay porn, which go figure, it was right up Zoro's alley. Sanji had forgotten for awhile that he even liked that stuff - or maybe it wasn't that he forgot so much as tried hard not to constantly think about it for reasons unknown.
There was never a bigger grin on Zoro's face than the one he was wearing now. It was safe to say he was a lot happier, the asshole. Of course he'd been enjoying it this whole time though, hadn't he? Teaching him that and just… What was worse is Zoro was acting stupidly innocent.
Sanji turned the laptop back around, his ears even flushed. "What is this..." he just kept repeating to himself. "Why are their hands so huge? is it for- What the fuck, man."
Zoro sat up and crawled over on his knees, smirking as he moved to look at the screen. "Why you looking?"
Of course the computer was frozen for a moment, that exact moment, of all the moments in the world. Sanji was going to break the power button here in a minute.
"I'm not looking at it, this is just what came up when I googled-" Sanji bit his tongue, snarling and putting his hand over the screen. "Who the hell looks at this kind of stuff?"
Zoro didn't seem too bothered, of course, why would he be - he was the one who would be looking this kind of stuff up. Instead he gestured to a picture that was peeking through Sanji's fingers.
"Look, a shit cook."
Of course, Sanji had to look, because if his picture somehow did magically come up in that search result, he was going to be pissed. But really, he should've trusted his judgement and known better than thinking his picture would be there. Instead if was just some red faced guy, in the middle of something very… intimate, who had blond hair and facial hair similar to his back home. That alone made him want to go clean shaven when he returned.
"Gah!" Sanji wanted to shield his eyes, but instead he slammed the laptop closed, swallowing thickly, not only for his sanity and his eyes that would need to be bleached. Something about seeing that kind of stuff in Zoro's body was very uncomfortable in a certain sense… if you knew what he meant. It was bad enough, battling Zoro's chronic morning wood issues than to have an unwanted guest pop up here accidentally.
"I can't believe I had to google that," Sanji breathed, his face in his hands before he moved them up to yank at his hair. "I'm never going online again."
Zoro's smirk calmed and he sat down more comfortably, looking over to the TV where his programs were still playing. Sanji glared at him. Bastard, scaring him like that and now going back to watching his own stuff. What was Sanji supposed to do now… he should've just kept checking Facebook.
"Oi cook." Zoro moved in the direction of his TV. "Movie?"
A movie? Well… although Sanji hated Zoro right now and was trying to calm down in a certain sense, a movie wouldn't be too bad. He doubted Zoro had anything he'd want to see or could understand, but he could look at it as practice, he supposed. Sanji got up, since he'd be the one switching the DVDs, and went to the television.
"What movie?" he asked, looking over their lacking selection.
Zoro followed him up, glancing at where Sanji was glancing, until pointing at something else. He didn't even say anything, he was just wearing that shit grin, again.
"Oh fuck you." It was the nearly forgotten porn disk. This would be a long night. But not in that way. Fuck it.
