C.A.M.E.O.1 and Only: You're right, it wasn't a letter. Kondo's just depressed, that's all. XD


Dear Fanfiction writers,

So…I was practically forced to read stories off of the Fanfiction website, and when I saw how many stories that had me as the main character, I was utterly shocked. And I wasn't shocked in a good way. I mean I was horrified.

If you're confused on what I'm saying, then I'll explain. The people I'm (Or should I say "was", since most of these stories were written between 2008-2010) with, when it comes to romance, are Hijikata-san, Shinpachi-kun, Kawakami Bansai, and Tama (Though there's only one story about us). I can't exactly complain about me being paired with Shinpachi-kun, since there're only three or four fics of us – which I'm glad – but dear lord, WHY DO YOU AUTHORS PAIR ME WITH HIJIKATA-SAN AND KAWAKAMI BANSAI?!

Hijikata-san tends to beat me up whenever he catches me playing badminton (Even though I rarely play badminton anymore, due to my addiction to anpans), and although I respect the Vice-Commander, I would not want to be paired with him! It's scary enough when he beats me up!

As for Kawakami Bansai…Fanfiction authors, there's no way to say this without yelling. HE NEARLY KILLED ME WHEN HE TRIED TO PREVENT ME FROM TELLING KONDO-SAN ABOUT ITO! WHAT THE HECK IS SO ROMANTIC ABOUT THAT?! BESIDES, WE'VE ONLY MET ONCE, AND THE ONLY THING I KNOW ABOUT BANSAI IS THAT HE'S PART OF THE KIHEITAI! AND THE REASON WHY HE DIDN'T KILL ME WAS BECAUSE HE WANTED TO LISTEN TO MY "SONG" FOR A LITTLE LONGER, THOUGH I DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHAT HE MEANT BY THAT!

Okay, I think I've calmed down now. Anyway, I'm apparently a forgettable character, since I hardly get any screen time in both the anime, and in Fanfiction. But to those who actually remember me, how about you try to write something different? Like how I joined the Shinsengumi, or how I became a spy?

I'm done reading Fanfiction. I need to eat some anpans.

Sincerely, Yamazaki Sagaru


I sort of like BansaixYamazaki, but I'm not too crazy about it. :P

Hope you enjoyed Sagaru's "letter"! :)