DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the installments of Ace Attorney or any of the characters.
A/N: Okay, so I used a little creative freedom on this one from AA: Apollo Justice. So, in case 2, the old lady climbing the fence to People Park isn't identified, but I'm sure we could all guess who that might be :) Yep, our favorite wicked witch of the witness stand, Wendy Oldbag! Since it's funny to imagine it that way, Imma go with it. Enjoy :)
ACE ATTORNEY SCRAPBOOK
Chapter 9: Persistence
Case Tag: 4-2 (Turnabout Corner)
Quote:
APOLLO:
Looks like the old lady's at it again...
OFFICER:
Look, I told you yesterday the park's off limits!
OLD LADY:
And I told you yesterday this is how I go home! Ok. You want me to go around? How about giving me five bucks...like yesterday.
APOLLO:
(...The con artist strikes again...)
June 15, 2026, 11:15am
People Park, Entrance
There were several reasons why getting into People Park was a necessity and why it was imperative that she was allowed inside. It was practically a life or death situation! Wendy Oldbag was not going to take no for an answer.
First of all, she lived a few blocks away from the park and it was usually the way she went home since traversing the path through the park shaved a few precious minutes off her time. Second of all, though she was certainly not a gossip (in her own mind, at least...), Wendy knew that a murder had happened in the park and she desperately wanted to sneak a peek at all the action. With all of the crimes she had been involved with, she could practically be a detective! Well, certainly a better one than that scruffy detective that was always hanging around her darling Edgey-poo...
While her heart would always belong to that handsome devil in the cranberry suit with the classy frilly white cravat, Wendy was also determined to get into People Park to get a glimpse at her new object of affection, that musical prosecuting heartthrob, Klavier Gavin. Of course, that rock n' roll racket was not her cup of tea, but that didn't stop her from falling under the spell of the sultry singer. Wendy was going to get into that park and see her cute little "Klavie" no matter what she had to do because none of those other screaming fangirls would ever catch his eye because those whippersnappers had nothing on her because back in her day, she was just the most beautiful girl in school and all of the boys wanted to be with her, including the dreamiest guy in school, who just so happened to be in a band and...*mentally rambles on and on and on...*
Standing across the street from the main entrance to People Park, Oldbag stared (though it was more like 'glared') intensely at the officer standing watch over the entryway, doing the job he was assigned by monitoring the comings and goings of all personnel into and out of the park in question. It was a good thing his eyes were focused elsewhere because one look at the expression on Oldbag's face could turn even the most macho of men into a man-puddle.
Like a woman on a mission, Oldbag strolled across the street and off to the side of the main entrance. The officer gave her a small smile and a nod, certainly not expecting any odd or disruptive behavior from a seemingly sweet and harmless old lady (if he only knew...), before returning his attention to the passing crowd. Once he looked away, Oldbag made a dash for the fence, channeling the days when she was the star athlete on the track team and she could run for miles and miles and, speaking of Miles, she was really wondering what Edgeworth was up to these days because she hadn't heard from him recently, even though she sent him a lovely bouquet and some collector's edition souvenirs from the Steel Samurai and...
"Ma'am!" the officer shouted, stunned at seeing an old lady suddenly attempt to climb up and over a fence. "Ma'am! You can't go in there!"
Oldbag just ignored the officer as he came running over to her.
"Ma'am! There's no entry to the park!" the guard started to explain as he tried to help Oldbag down from the fence.
Oldbag, persistent (or annoying, depending on one's perspective...) as always, wasn't having any of the officer's concern.
"Now don't you tell me where I can't go, young fella! I always walk through this park on my way home!" she scolded him.
"Please, get down from there! You'll hurt yourself, ma'am!"
Despite her fidgeting and squirming as he pulled her down from the fence, the officer managed to successfully pull Oldbag down from attempting to hurdle the fence. In hindsight, however, it probably would have been safer to leave her hanging up on the fence post...
"You listen here, whippersnapper!" Oldbag began to release her special brand of justice. "This is the way that I get home! I just worked a long shift at the Gatewater Land because they had some overnight special event thing for the start of summer and I am pooped! Are you really going to deprive an old lady of her precious beauty sleep?! Not that I really need it, of course, because when I was younger, I was just the prettiest thing in the world! Everyone called me Queen Wendy and-"
The officer held his hands up in mock surrender, hoping to curtail the old woman's rant.
"No, ma'am, it's not that," he tried to reassure her. "It's just that there is a police investigation in the park and I am not allowed to let anyone inside."
"I know all about being a security guard, sonny!" Oldbag continued. "When I worked at Global Studios, I was the best security guard that the studio ever saw! Anytime anyone needed anything, they would always say 'go to Oldbag, she'll know what to do!' because that was the truth! And also my darling Klavie is going to be here any moment, so I can't miss him at all. Of course, my heart will always belong to my wonderful Edgey-poo, but, since he's busy right now, it won't hurt to flatter Klavier with the beautiful presence that is mine-"
The officer sighed, having a sinking feeling that nothing he could say would deter the old woman from her mission (whatever that was).
"Listen, ma'am, I'm really, really sorry but I can't let you go into the park," he said. "Is there anything I can do to not have you try and climb the fence?"
Oldbag stopped mid sentence, thinking it over. Her expression completely sobered, causing the officer to shift uncomfortably.
"How about some cash for my trouble?"
The officer blinked before shaking his head and then fishing around in his left pants pocket for his wallet. He pulled out a five dollar bill.
"Um, all I have is five dollars..."
Oldbag snatched the green piece of paper from the officer's hand and began running down the street, waving her bounty back and forth as she ran. Maybe she could try again tomorrow...
