Disclaimer: I do not own Mass Effect or any of the characters, neither do I earn any money writing these stories.

Author Note: Thanks a lot for reading and sticking with me. I appreciate every single person reading and of course, every review helps to keep me motivated.

As mentioned before, this Chapter might be a bit of jump but I did my best to fit it in nonetheless. Maybe it was because of the Baby-Reaper in Part 8... I am still not convinced that it was the best they could have come up with as End-Boss but that's my personal opinion. Anyway, I hope you enjoy Part 9 - as always I do my best to keep the emotional roller-coaster running.

My thanks and hugs go to Shenzi and Sia for being my very helpful and amazing Beta-Readers!


"It's not happening!" Shepard's face was almost without emotion. Only those that knew her a bit could see the glistening in her eyes. Everyone of her Core-Team looked at her.

"Shepard... I think Miranda is right," Garrus said carefully. He almost immediately received an unnerving stare from her.

"No! Just, no!" She was pacing a few steps to the left and back again. Though she tried to keep her mask up, she was failing rapidly. "Besides, we don't have enough room... and all positions are taken." It was obvious that this was her last line of defense and it brought out a pitying smile on Joker's lips and that of some others as well.

"Two people left the crew just recently... and we have so much work to do that...," Jacob started while he looked at her with a understanding smile. "He's received a lot of recommendations and seems to be good at what he does. We could really use his help," he added and didn't wince under her glare. "Didn't you say that we needed the best?" Ouch... that hurt. Jacob was right – they were all right of course, she knew that but she had a little pride left that just refused to budge.

"Commander, I'm pissed off as well... but they are right. We know what he can do and we know how he works," Joker said. He had seen Shepard in difficult moods before but this was different. She was not simply angry... she was emotionally stressed and he couldn't blame her.

"I don't need someone on my ship that doesn't trust me, Joker!" She almost yelled at him now, "Hell, I'd prefer to have Toombs with me. At least I know that he is tempted to shoot me!" She allowed herself to fall back against the table and sighed deeply.

"Commander... may I remind you that you barely trusted any of us when you came on board for the first time?" Miranda noted and her voice was surprisingly kind.

"No doubt... and concerning Cerberus and the Illusive Man I was right, no?" she snapped and Miranda looked away. Not a moment later, Shepard sighed, "Listen... I have come to trust each one of you. We went to hell and back again and you're all still here. That means something." She paused for a moment before she added, "But this is different."

"Shepard, he can't help that he is socially challenged – just like I can't help being incredibly good looking and hilarious. It's in our nature. But he has the trust of the Council, Anderson, the Alliance and let's not forget that he might be our key to more biotics. As far as I know, he helped as a mediator between Burns and the L2s. I think it could come in handy." Joker brought up as a new argument. At that moment, Shepard would have liked to strangle him. She ran her thumbs in massaging circles over her temples, trying to disperse the upcoming headache before it could manifest.

"Can we even afford to feed another Biotic? It's bad enough as it is... half the crew has some biotic abilities which has pushed the consumption levels up..." She objected again and now even Miranda couldn't help but smile over Shepard's attempt to find reasons for a denial.

"Commander, I can assure you that there are enough supplies that we can feed him as well. It will not put a dent into our finances," The former Cerberus operative responded.

"What about breach of security? He's still Alliance... we'll have to set up a different protocol for him. He can't...," she started and was cut off by EDI's voice.

"Don't forget that I am the Normandy, Commander. Whatever security protocol you want to invoke, it will be enforced moments after you announce it." At that very moment Shepard just wanted to smash the AI core and space her entire team.

"I got it... I got it." She sighed again, "So, everyone supports the suggestion to have an Alliance contact on the Normandy?"

"Well, I wouldn't say I like the idea, but it will turn out useful. Of course, only as long as he does not interfere with our work," Miranda added and Shepard finally nodded in defeat.

Of course she had been glad that the Council had finally started to admit that there might be more to the threat of the Reapers than they had acknowledged – but the fact that they had combined it with their own demands had annoyed her. Why the hell did it have to be someone from the Alliance? Why had it not been someone or something else? C-Sec? She liked Bailey – no matter how tough the old man acted, he had his heart in the right spot.

Shepard groaned silently. It wasn't that she hated the Alliance, but her trust had been reduced drastically and now she'd be reminded of everything from her past... by the man that haunted her dreams. "Just great," She thought to herself before she dismissed everyone.


Things looked much different now... the ship to be exact. The hull had been repaired, the yellow color had been replaced by blue and a new logo decorated the ship. He recognized the two letters L and H but he couldn't read what was surrounding it. It would be interesting to find out what had changed. Though now that he was standing in front of the ship, he couldn't deny his excitement anymore. There was also some fear – how would the crew react? What sort of people were they and how would Shepard welcome him? He took a deep breath and walked towards the entrance.

"Welcome aboard the new Normandy, Commander Alenko," Jacob greeted him when he had passed the airlock. "I'm Jacob Taylor, though you probably know that already." Kaidan nodded but shook the hand of the former Cerberus member. "Commander Shepard apologizes that she can't welcome you personally but she is in another conference. She will join us as soon as she is able," he added and Kaidan couldn't help but feel a knot in his stomach. He seriously doubted that Shepard really felt sorry about being busy. All in all it would be interesting to see how she would react.

"No problem, I don't mean to cause any trouble," he responded, despite his emotional turmoil. He had always been good at hiding his emotions – this would just be his final test.

"How about I show you to your quarters first? I think it will be more relaxed if we have a few less duffel bags in the way," Jacob suggested and Kaidan nodded in agreement.

"Why don't you let me do the tour this time, Taylor?" a very familiar voice sounded in his ears. When he turned around he stared at the very familiar face that belong to the voice.

"Joker...," he just said in a low voice. The pilot was standing in front of him... yes, standing – with no other help than some leg braces.

"Long time no see, huh, Kaidan?" Joker responded instead. His face somehow showed both anger and joy.

"Alright, Moreau, I'll get back to work. Call if you need anything," Jacob suddenly said, the last bit directed at Kaidan. He saluted and then left.

"You look good," he said and he meant it. During all the time he had known Joker, it had been a rare sight to see him walk... and usually it had been with someone's help. To see him standing there, taking steps towards him was... overwhelming.

"Yeah, a week of shore leave after a dangerous mission can really do wonders to your taint," Jeff retorted. He was still joking around like he used to, but there was a certain tone to his voice that did not allow the familiarity of the past to set foot.

"I would have guessed that you'd spend it on the ship. You rarely ever left the old Normandy unless you had to." Kaidan tried to create a friendly neutral ground. The pilot just shrugged and started walking. Alenko followed.

"Well, you'll see that things are a bit different here but you'll also notice a few things that should be familiar. The CIC for example." He pointed forward and Kaidan noticed the galaxy map and the platform for the CO.

"From the outside I realized that she is larger than the original but I didn't expect this." Kaidan looked around in awe. Alliance warships all had the disadvantage of being relatively cramped. Whoever had constructed this ship had had the comfort of the crew in mind.

"Yeah, she's larger alright. That's why we have to use a shuttle for most missions." Kaidan couldn't help but grin.

"No more neck-breaking Mako drops?" Joker turned around and for the first time, Kaidan could see his friend again. It was an honest grin – without reservation and anger.

"No, though we just got ourselves one, so if you desire a Mako-drop... can do." Kaidan couldn't help but laugh at his friend's comment.

"No – I think I am good. But if you have a shuttle... why the hell would you get a Mako? That thing was a nightmare," he asked while they passed around the galaxy map.

"It's a long story. I'll tell you one day," Joker responded as he continued his way to the elevator. Out of the corner of his eyes, Kaidan registered the words 'laboratory' and 'armory' on each side of the elevator. It would be very interesting to see the entire ship – there would be a lot of things for him to discover. Joker must have noticed him eying the two doors because he added:

"On this level is also our com room. I'd show it to you but Shepard is in a meeting." While saying those words, he observed the Alliance soldier. He didn't hide his stare either – Joker had never been one for subtlety. "C'mon – I'll show you your room." Joker then said as he stepped into the elevator.


"Joker, as soon as everyone is back, set a course to Tuchanka, we...," Shepard hesitated a moment. "Joker-...", Shepard was standing at the helm but there was nobody there. She ruffled her hair a bit. "EDI... where the hell is my pilot?"

"Jeff is currently touring the ship with Commander Alenko," the AI responded. Shepard sighed.

"Ah crap... I was hoping we could be on our way before he got here." Even though she had accepted the general vote for Kaidan to be the Alliance's contact, she wasn't too happy about it. There had been differences, and fights and talks... but the last accusation from his side had gone deep. He had brushed everything aside that she had told him and had continued to push her buttons. Accusing her of being Cerberus had hurt... worse than anything else. It's not that she didn't understand his anger and his frustration but it did not justify what he had said. All her other old friends had believed her and had understood what she was doing and why- only the one person who should have sided with her... he had pushed her away. And now she had to host him on her own ship.

"Where are they now, EDI?" If she had to speak with him, she'd rather get it over with ASAP.

"Jeff and Commander Alenko have just finished touring Deck 4 and are in the mess at this moment." Shepard sighed again... the familiar feeling of nausea started to stir up but this time she tried her hardest to keep it under control. There was no need for her to vomit on his shoes, no matter how angry she was at him. After her insides had calmed down a bit, she turned around and made her way to the elevator.

Once she arrived on the Deck 3 she waited for a moment in the open elevator. Her heart was pounding in her chest but she tried to convince herself that it was just the anger.

"Gardner is actually a pretty good cook. Nobody would have guessed when we first started our journey," she heard Joker say. Unwillingly she had to grin. It was true, the food at the beginning of their mission had been horrible. Sure, he had tried his best but what the military offers is just meant to keep you from starving, not excite your taste buds.

"I'd like to see you do better with military provisions – I did the best I could. Luckily the Commander provided me with real food rations," Gardner said and it was almost adorable when she could hear the pride in his voice. Ever since he had been able to cook with the new ingredients, he was glowing with pride and joy when someone had complimented his meals- of course he would never admit it and usually made his little jokes about it but he couldn't fool Shepard.

Without realizing it she had started to walk and she was now just a few steps away from them. Gardner looked at her and smiled.

"Commander!" he beamed with joy and of course Joker and Kaidan turned around and stared at her.

"You'll have the chance to put your skills to even better use. Commander Alenko is an L2 biotic," She directed at the older man. His eyes flickered for a moment but he nodded.

"I'll see to it that he won't go hungry," he smiled and Shepard returned that smile. "As a matter of fact, I have to start preparing dinner for the crew, so if you'll excuse me." He saluted quickly and started to work. Kaidan looked a bit confused at the halfhearted military behavior. Shepard then turned towards him.

"It's my duty to welcome you on board the Normandy." She bit her tongue to suppress the desire to tell him that she had only bowed to the majority. "So, welcome Staff Commander Alenko," She reached out her hand in a professional manner. Deep inside she was impressed at herself. Her hand wasn't shaking even when she looked him into the eyes.

"Thank you, Commander. I'm honored to be here." He shook her hand. This situation reminded a bit of their first meeting, back on the old Normandy, but this time, the atmosphere was tense.

"Is that so? We'll see," she paused for a moment and then broke the handshake. "Things are different here. We are not an Alliance warship." She wanted to make him feel uncomfortable... no matter how childish it was. He was invading her home... and he probably didn't even know it.

"I'm aware of that, ma'am. I'll adjust as best as I can," he responded respectfully. He probably didn't want to give her a reason to be angrier at him than she already was but she just shrugged her shoulders.

"As long as you follow the general rules on my ship, you can do whatever you want. After all, I don't have command over you." Shepard noticed the looks from Joker. He had been silent for a while and that told her that he had been observing them closely. She tried to ignore it.

"Have you been shown your quarters yet?" For a moment she wanted to smack her forehead. That sounded... wrong and it bothered her even more that Joker grinned.

"I've shown him his place in the Observation deck," Her pilot added quickly when he saw her glare.

"Anything else you need, Staff Commander?" She wanted this to be over. She wanted to bury herself so deep in her work that nobody could find her, ever. Kaidan shook his head.

"Alright. Then I'll show you our... 'server room,'" she said and signaled Joker and Kaidan to follow her. They passed through the medbay. "As soon as the rest of the team has returned, you'll have time to meet and speak with everyone. You should have an idea whom to expect."

"So, it really is the same Dr. Chakwas?" he wanted to know and Shepard nodded and so did Joker.

"Yeah, it's good to have her on board. I didn't have to do any explaining to her and she knows my medications and everything. Also, she's quite funny when she's head a few drinks." Shepard looked over her shoulder and Joker went quiet. When they reached the door at the end of the room she turned around and looked at Kaidan.

"If you have any weapons on you, keep them where they are! Is that clear?" She knew that this was surprising and confusing for him but she had to insist.

"Ok... but why...," Shepard merely shook her head.

"You'll see," she only answered before she unlocked and opened the door.

Not a moment later he knew why she had told him to keep his weapons holstered. Legion was standing at the end of the room. He rose his head and the little metal plates stood up.

"Shepard-Commander!" he stated and Kaidan froze. Shepard couldn't quite stifle a chuckle.

"Legion, this is Commander Alenko. He'll be staying on the Normandy for a while," she said as sincerely as she could. "Commander Alenko, this is Legion – a mobile platform of the geth. He has helped us greatly on our missions and through him we are trying to improve our relation with his people."

"Yes. Shepard-Commander – we received a message from our people. We believe it is helpful for achieving further goals." She couldn't help it but smile. She knew Legion was a geth and he had killed before... yet there was something adorable about him, especially when he lifted those small metal parts on top of his head.

"Alright, I will be with you in a few minutes, Legion." She turned around to look at Kaidan who still hadn't moved a muscle but who was staring at the geth with disbelief and a moment later at Shepard with an angry- yet questioning look. "EDI, once we leave this room, Commander Alenko will have no further access. I want a safe-zone for Legion as well as for you." She didn't break eye-contact and she could see that something was boiling inside of him. When the blue hologram popped up on its platform, Kaidan's view rushed towards it.

"As you wish, Commander."

"Oh, by the way, Alenko, that's EDI, our AI," Joker explained and Shepard was amused to see the expression on Kaidan's face. Shock would probably describe it best.

"Welcome, Staff Commander Alenko. I hope you will enjoy your time aboard. Should you be in need of anything, I'll be glad to assist you," EDI said with a friendly inflection.

"Tha-Thank you." Kaidan brought out. It was more than Sayen had expected.

"Joker, how about you finish the tour and then get us to Tuchanka as soon as everyone has returned. And EDI – once they're done with the tour, Commander Alenko will receive regular crew access – besides what I mentioned before. His calls and information transfer will also undergo regular security scans. If you find anything questionable, you will inform me," she commanded while still looking at Kaidan who now simply stared at her.

"Aye, aye Commander," Joker confirmed her order.

"Understood, Shepard," EDI responded. Sayen made a movement towards the door and when Kaidan didn't move she almost gently pushed him into the direction of the exit.


Once they were outside he turned around and grabbed her arm roughly. "Tell me this is a joke," he snapped completely unprofessional. His hand was shaking ever so slightly, while he pulled her close wanting to shake her in his rage. "What the hell are you thinking? An AI? There is a reason why they are illegal! And shouldn't you, of all people, know what AIs can lead to? And I am not talking about the obvious proof you have sitting in that room!" He hadn't noticed his voice getting louder and louder and he sure as hell had not noticed the small group of the crew members, who had arrived in the mess, staring at him. "They killed Ash... and you... you..." He couldn't finish the sentence as he was trying to calm his anger. He had pulled her face close to his, staring at her but also taking in her scent. When the blue glow ran over his body for few moments, he suddenly wasn't sure if it had been caused by his anger or by her being so close. He knew he had crossed the line but he just couldn't let go of her.

She pressed her other arm against his chest and pushed away to break his grip on her. Without breaking the eye-contact she stepped away from him.

"I remember very well, Alenko! I was the one who had to decide and I was the one who left her behind! Don't you dare imply that I have forgotten!" Shepard yelled, her voice clearly surpassing his own anger and it startled him. He usually didn't lose control this quickly and the Shepard he remembered, didn't either. There had been moments in the past of course, but usually she had waited until she had been somewhere private. This was completely different and the rage she displayed told him that she had not forgotten about Virmire.

"I'll tell you one thing, Commander Alenko... you volunteered for this position for whatever reason and now you got it. But instead of dealing with it, you haven't even been on my ship for an hour and you've already started to question my judgment! I won't have that, you understand? If you desire the Alliance military standards then you can just bugger off and return to them! At least you can continue wearing your fucking blindfolds!" She was panting heavily. Kaidan was speechless. His anger was almost gone – her outbreak had suffocated it. The awkward silence that followed was soon disturbed by EDI's voice.

"Commander, would you like me to tag Staff Commander Alenko as threat to 'Last Hope?'" For a moment fear flooded through him – this could be the moment that he had ruined everything. He looked at Shepard and maybe she saw the pleading in his eyes or maybe she found something that made her understand his initial reaction.

"No, that is not necessary, but I don't want him in the AI Core. If he so much as tries to open that door I want him tranqued or shot! Don't worry, his biotic barrier will catch a few bullets." She had been staring at him the entire time but by the end of the sentence she turned around. "Back to what you all were doing," she directed at the obviously staring crew before she returned to the AI Core and locked the door behind her.

"That was a close one, Alenko," Joker noted and Kaidan couldn't do anything but nod and breathed deeply in relief. After that they continued their tour and Joker showed him the rest of the ship. It was much larger than the original ship and there were a lot more rooms than he had imagined. Extra offices, the lab, the armory, a huge engine room, two observation decks and so on and so on. He did realize at some point that they never went up to Deck 1. When he had asked Joker had only told him, "Shepard's cabin." Of course he had been curious to see it, but he was in no mood to press his luck. If he would provoke her with the same intensity as earlier, she would probably find a way to space him... even while they were docked.

When they had finished the tour and Joker had made his way back to the cockpit, Kaidan joined him. The thoughts that were responsible for the fight earlier came back to him. "What's your opinion on the AI and the Geth?" he tried to sound casual and observed the pilot closely.

"Legion has been with us ever since we headed to the old Reaper. It seems he saved the ground team a few times, so they grabbed him on their way out. We got some interesting insights and information about the Geth and their structure. Shepard believes there is more to them than what you and the majority thinks – but that's not for me to discuss." Kaidan nodded, that was something he could accept.

"But you don't seem to be too convinced either." He just wanted the opinion of his friend.

"True...but then again I got used to EDI as well and I really didn't like her presence at first," Joker stated and he grinned as if he was remembering something.

"That is an understatement, Jeff," EDI responded and her voice drove a shudder through Kaidan. She was everywhere... no matter what he did or what he'd say, she... it would know.

"Well, alright, I hated it, I won't deny it. After all, you were installed to inform the Illusive Man of any meaningful events." The pilot paused for a moment. "By the way, why and when did that change? I mean why did you tell us about the hidden code in the distress signal?" Kaidan just listened. Through observation he could learn a lot and that was probably the best in his current situation.

"I am an artificial intelligence, Jeff. I develop, learn and adept. The crew of the Normandy achieved a higher priority than the Illusive Man. I began to consider myself part of the crew." Joker shrugged and gave a lopsided grin.

"Well... by now we are actually your crew. Does it ever bother you when we stomp down the hallways?" He joked.

"No, it does not bother me – though I wish you'd stomp down my hallways more often, Jeff." Kaidan rose an eyebrow when he heard it and he almost had to laugh when he saw Joker blush.

"That... erm... that's creepy, EDI," The pilot stammered before he straightened up a little. "Besides, if I stomped, I'd probably break a leg," he added and Kaidan felt a relieved smile forming on his face. This really was the Joker he remembered, there was no more hostility.

"But seriously, without EDI we wouldn't be here. She saved me and the ship when the Collectors came for us and she is responsible that we even made it back through the O4-Relay. In her current state, EDI is the Normandy, more or less ,and she's had plenty of chances to kill us." Joker was more serious than Kaidan had ever seen him before. "I know you love the Alliance... no matter if, despite, or because of all the rules – but you'll see that things can be different and still work well." Kaidan sat down in one of the chairs and nodded. Maybe his old friend was right.

"You shouldn't forget that it was the Alliance and the Council that denied her any help. It's not like she didn't try to convince them." Joker turned away from the console and looked Kaidan in the eyes. "Did you know that her first command was that we head to the Citadel? She talked to Anderson and the Council and they insulted and stonewalled her because of her connection to Cerberus. As far as I know she also asked about you – without any results." The pilot returned to his work to leave the newcomer to his thoughts.