Chapter 9: Know Your Business


SUMMARY: Logan proposes a fake relationship. Veronica shoots him down.


When they arrived at the beach where the surfing competition was being held, there was a small crowd already gathered, including a few from the Neptune High surfing circle.

"Remember, we're not quite friends, even if you've supposedly gotten over being really pissed at me," Veronica reminded Logan as they climbed out of his X-Terra.

"Aye, aye, cap'n," he replied, tipping an invisible hat. With his superior height, he was quick to spot Bodie Chang and his parents and amble over, Veronica trotting after him.

"Logan." Bodie held out a fist, which Logan obligingly bumped. "I thought Duncan was gonna be interviewing me today."

"He had a doctor's appointment, forgot about it til Lilly reminded him yesterday, so I'm pinch-hitting. Alas, my days of coasting through this class on charm alone appear to be over." Bodie laughed, and Veronica cleared her throat pointedly. "Oh, yeah. This is Veronica Mars. She's your paparazzi today."

Veronica rolled her eyes. "Photographer, actually," she said primly, gesturing to the camera slung around her neck.

Bodie smiled easily. "Cool. I've seen you around school."

"Likewise. Anyway, I want to get a few action shots when you're on the water, but would love to take a few here on the beach. I can do it while Logan's interviewing you if you're not comfortable posing."

The surfer's smile sharpened. "I'm happy to pose. Want me to take the top off my wetsuit?"

"While I'm sure the Neptune High Navigator's readers would appreciate that shot, I doubt the school will let us print it," Logan cut in, acid in his tone, his gaze narrowed, and not just from the bright afternoon sun. Veronica wasn't sure what had him so het up, but he was definitely ticked off about something. He was glaring at Bodie, jaw clenched.

Veronica smiled brightly at the other boy. "Yeah, I don't know if Duncan or Ms. Dent would approve a topless photo. How about I just take a few shots of you with your surfboard, maybe a bit closer to the water?"

"Sure," Bodie said cheerfully. "And you ever want a private modeling session, I'm happy to do that too."

They made their way to the shoreline, and Veronica got several good shots of him both in and out of the water. Bodie continued to flirt with her in a manner so obvious she had to work hard to keep from rolling her eyes at him. Eventually Logan started calling questions for the guy to answer as she snapped her photos, allowing her to interject with a few directions for posing and positioning from time to time.

As they were wrapping up an announcement came over the PA system and Bodie sighed. "Well, guys, I'd better go prep. I'm surfing the next round."

"Oh great! I'm hoping to get some action shots."

"Be sure to get my good side!" Bodie said with a grin and a wink. "Which is all of them, of course!"

Veronica laughed. "I got you covered."

The surfer headed toward the area where the other competitors were getting ready to go out on the water. Veronica let her gaze roam over the beach, trying to determine where she could get a good shot of the surfers as they rode the waves. She decided on a spot about a hundred yards from where they were standing and headed down the beach toward it, stopping when she realized Logan wasn't following her.

She turned back to see a funny look on his face. "What?" she snapped, conscious of a small group of Neptuners nearby.

"I got you covered?" Logan mimicked her, his voice a falsetto.

Veronica shrugged. "I'm not a bad hand at the camera, you know. And I enjoy taking pictures of things other than cheating spouses from time to time."

Logan shook his head. "Why your dad let you tag along with some of his PIs this summer, I will never know. But what I meant was, did you have to flirt with him?"

"I wasn't, though."

"Right."

"I wasn't!"

He rolled his eyes. "I can guarantee you that's not how he sees it."

Flabbergasted, Veronica stared at him for a long moment, then turned and stomped down the beach. That she didn't entirely have to fake the fuming probably lent credence to their narrative, but she didn't much care about that right this instant. After a moment, Logan stalked after her.

She ignored him and focused instead on checking the viewfinder on her camera, taking a few trial shots of some of the surfers already on the water.

"I wasn't flirting with him," she said quietly after a while. "Or at least I didn't mean to."

He chuckled. "I'll believe that second part. I swear, you're the most perceptive person I know, except when it comes to relationship stuff as it pertains to yourself. It's like the one area of your life where you've got a perpetual set of blinders on."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Although Lilly had said something similar on occasion. Veronica frowned.

"Exactly. You just proved my point, Mars."

"That isn't helpful, Logan."

He sighed. "Look, Veronica, you were hot before you decided to chop off your hair and stop wearing so much pink. Now that hotness factor has increased by a factor of ten. Teenage boys are bound to notice. Case in point, Bodie Chang."

"His come ons were really lame."

He barked out a laugh, surprising her. "I guess I should just be glad you recognized them for what they are, given how often you've remained oblivious in the past. Then again, subtlety is obviously not Bodie's style."

"Oblivious?" Veronica lowered her camera to stare at him. "When have I ever been oblivious to the people around me?"

"Almost never," Logan agrees, "except when they're flirting with you—or at least trying to."

"Give me one example of a guy who was trying to flirt with me without my realized it."

"Just one? Really? Fine, how about the first, that I noticed? Duncan Kane."

She gaped at him. "That's…. That's sick!"

He rolled his eyes. "I don't mean recently, duh. I'm saying that he had a huge crush on you before that night when we found everything out."

"No, he didn't. I was Lilly's annoying friend."

"Whom he left his room to hang out with, even though he crawled back into his cave every time some of your other friends would come by. I mean, the only reason he got me to stay over the night of Lilly's birthday was his desperate need for a wingman."

She's flat-out staring now. "Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack. Or a call from my dad."

She was saved from having to reply as the competition announcer called out Bodie's name and gave a brief rundown on his athletic history. "I have to get these shots."

"Yeah. Let me know if you need me to explain any of the moves he's doing."

As she knew nothing about surfing apart from the fact that it involved waves and a board, she was grateful for his instruction. As he explained what Bodie was doing—a trifle more coherently than the announcer, for that matter—she frowned at him.

"What?"

"You should be out there, kicking Bodie's butt."

Logan rolled his eyes. "What do I need to compete for? I'm happy just surfing for fun."

"You're good, though. I've seen you do a lot of the moves he's doing."

He shrugged. "So?"

"So, maybe it's something you should think about."

He sighed. "You think my dad would let me compete in a sport where guys are regularly photographed with their shirts off?"

She lowered her camera, laid an arm on his. "He won't be in your life forever." There was conviction and fury in her statement. It wasn't just a declaration; it was a vow. She was tempted to say more, but suspected she might lapse into melodrama.

"Well, he's in it now, so I'd rather not count eggs before they're hatched, if it's all the same to you."

"Fine," she said, picking up her camera again. "But I'm going to make sure those eggs hatch, and sooner rather than later. I swear, if you'd just let me go to my dad—"

"No, Veronica. We've talked about this. My mom couldn't handle a Daddy Dearest scandal. Running that kind of press gauntlet would kill her as surely as force feeding her a bottle of pills."

"I know, I know," she said. "I just hate it. I hate him."

"Believe me, there is no way your hate is vaster or deeper than mine." They stared out at the glistening waves in front of him for a long while before she sighed and turned back to him.

"I'm pretty sure I have enough shots for your article. Why don't we head back? We can talk about how you plan to modify our little school drama in the safety of your car."

He smiled. "Sure. We can even stop somewhere and buy food. And ice cream."

She nodded approvingly. "I have trained you well, Echolls."

"Damn straight, Mars."


He took her to a little Italian restaurant about thirty minutes from Neptune, assuring her they were unlikely to run into schoolmates there.

She ordered manicotti and he ordered the lasagna. It was a habit of his to order a full meal when she was with him, especially if it was Italian, because she often ended up eating half of whatever he ordered anyway. She pretended ignorance at his tactics, but nodded when he glanced at her as he gave the waitress his order, so she knew he was wise to her ways.

"You know," she said casually after the obligatory moaning over the yumminess of the food in her mouth, "if anyone spotted us they'd think we were on some kind of secret date or something."

"I wish."

"Har, har, I'm being serious here, Logan. People would think we were in a clandestine relationship if they saw us meeting up." She frowned when his eyes blanked for a second, and then he grinned. "What?"

"What?"

"You made your 'aha, I have an idea I think you'll like' face. In fact, you're still wearing it. So spill."

"I was just thinking that could be our new narrative. I could be your secret boyfriend. It would give me a reason to lay off on the hazing, and those 'in the know' wouldn't question it if I took a few measures to protect you."

She rolled her eyes at him. "Logan. Dude. One, I don't need your protection. Two, you just got out of a fake relationship."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"So now you're going to dive into another one? Don't you want to, I don't know, sow your wild oats on the countless Neptune girls eager to throw their vaginas on your dick?"

"Why should I? Because when you put it that way, it sounds so appealing? It's not like I see you sowing any wild oats, despite your more adventurous wardrobe. Which, by the way, I wholly approve of."

Veronica glared at him. "This is not about me."

He crossed his arms and gave her a steely look. "We could make it about you."

"I'm just saying, you're a teenage boy, and you should allow yourself to enjoy your youth."

"Like you're doing, General V?"

"Absolutely. I am totally enjoying my youth. You see this?" She waved at her empty plate. "This used to be a full order of manicotti. You see that?" She waved at his still mostly full plate. "That's most of a lasagna, half of which you'll be giving to me. I am enjoying my youthful metabolism."

Logan rolled his eyes, but cut a generous portion of his lasagna and transferred it to her waiting plate. "Your metabolism isn't due to your age, it's because you've got a tapeworm or are secretly descended from Pac-Man or something."

"Whatever. My point remains, though. There is no reason for us to fake a relationship. It makes more sense if you stay free to flirt with people to get what we want. And that way you can even sleep with them if you like."

He grimaced. "Contrary to popular opinion, I have no desire to follow in my father's footsteps, thank you."

She bit her lip, laid a hand on his. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"Yeah, I know. Still, stop trying to push me at random skanks, okay? If I was looking for no-strings sex, I would've stayed with Lilly. Fucking around isn't my style."

She smiled. "I know. I'm just saying you shouldn't be tied down to a fake relationship. You never know, you might find someone you actually want to be with. You might even know them from school, but just never let yourself take the chance on being with them. You could show them you're interested, see if they might be interested too—heck, it's Neptune, and you're Logan Echolls, which means every girl in school is interested in you."

"Surely not every girl."

She laughed. "You know what I mean, O King of the 09ers." Then she sobered. "Take a chance and be happy, Lo. You deserve it, and I really, really want it for you. So no, I'm not going to enter into a fake relationship with you. I want to leave you free to make a real one."

He ducked his head shyly. "Thanks, Veronica. And maybe I will show some lucky lady I'm boyfriend material."

Her stomach did a funny little clench at his words. He needs someone to love him, she thought. Outwardly, she smiled and said, "Boy, you better believe it. You'd be the best boyfriend ever."

He laughed awkwardly. "Now you're doing it up too thick."

She sighed, cursing Aaron Echolls for his abusive ways, for leaving his son so blind and self-denigrating. "Logan, look at me, because I'm only going to say this once." Actually, what she was about to say was something she would say over and over again in as many ways possible until the guy clued into his awesomeness. "You would be a fantastic boyfriend because you are sweet and thoughtful and a good listener. Apart from that, you are smart and good and funny and brave and an all-around great person. Don't settle for less than someone who makes you happy." She frowned. "Also, don't look at me like that."

"Like what?" His voice was strangely hoarse. She reached over and pushed his glass closer.

"Take a drink. Stop giving me your puppy eyes. I meant it, and you should know that about yourself. And also we need to go, so finish your lasagna."

She focused on finishing the portion he'd given her, clearing her plate in record time. When she looked up, his own portion was virtually untouched, and he was staring at her. She raised her eyebrows at him, and he flushed.

"Ah, I'm not too hungry. Why don't I just get the check?"

She hummed in agreement. "We're still getting ice cream on the way home, right?"

"Do I look like I'm foolish enough to get between you and ice cream?" He raised a hand, caught a waitress's attention, and asked for the bill.

She smiled. "Like I said, you're a smart guy. So. No fake relationships, okay?"

"Yep," he said, grinning. "You've convinced me. No fake relationships, to leave the way clear for a real one."

She wondered if he had anyone in mind. She tried not to frown when she wondered who that might be. For some reason, despite what she'd said, she couldn't imagine Logan with any of the girls she knew from Neptune High. None of Lilly's 'skank army' was good enough for him, and he only really hung out with the 09ers and the surfer guys. Obviously, she would need to watch him more closely.

Later, as they turned onto the PCH, he glanced over at her. "You're quiet."

"Just thinking."

"About what?"

"Stuff."

"Wow, such detail!"

She rolled her eyes at him, but was grateful to fall into their normal banter. "So, your majesty, how do you propose we go about establishing a truce even before we've done more than fire the opening volley?"

He smiles. "Lilly and I had a few ideas about that. You just leave it to us."

She sighed. "I don't like not being in the know."

"You know all the relevant information. And I'll be working on this in the background for now, so you can remain your prickly self at school for a little while longer."

"Fine. But this means you're buying me an extra scoop of ice cream. You know I don't like surprises."

He smiled. "Tiny one, you say that like I wasn't going to buy you an extra scoop anyway."

"Have I mentioned how well your training has come along, Echolls?"

"Only once today, Mars. It bears repeating."


Logan dropped Veronica off at home, where she immediately headed into her dad's workshop over the garage, Corny's package in hand. The workshop was home to a collection of specialized tools and equipment they both used to tinker with spy cams, forge IDs, and all manner of quasi-legal doohickeys and whatchamacallits.

Veronica was busy soldering some of the wires she'd stuck into the ceramic figure Corny had made her when she heard her dad calling her name from downstairs.

"Honey? Are you in the Batcave?"

"Dad, I told you not to call it that."

"You were perfectly happy to call it that when you were satisfied being the Robin to my Batman," Keith said as he came up the stairs. "Now that you've decided you want to be Batman yourself, suddenly I don't get to call it the Batcave."

"It's the workshop, Dad. Not the Batcave. Unless you want to be the butler."

"I'll have you know that the butler is awesome." Keith rubbed his chin with a finger thoughtfully. "But, no, I'm still Batman."

She rolled her eyes. "Then this isn't the Batcave."

He came up behind her. She leaned into the kiss he placed on her temple. "Honey, is that what I think it is?"

"Dad, don't ask about it, don't think about it."

"Plausible deniability?" It was a rule they'd come up with when Veronica was five. She'd found Keith's secret stash of cigars—Lianne hated it when he smoked them, even though he really only did it when very stressed or when celebrating—and he had told his daughter not to ask or think about what was tucked into the hollowed out pages of a hardbound copy of Mario Puzo's The Godfather.

"Plausible deniability. I thought you weren't going to be back until Friday?"

"Well, I swooped down, kicked ass, and ninjaed out of DC, very much like a certain Dark Knight would have, and decided to come home early for some quality time with my number one daughter. Who absolutely is not inserting an IED like a catheter in a ceramic penis. Are you coming down for dinner or should I bring something up here for you?"

"I ate earlier, with Logan."

"Uh huh. Are you coming down or should I bring you something?"

She looked up from what she was doing, saw him smirking at her. "What's for dinner?"

"Swedish meatballs."

She grinned. "I'll come down, then."

"I'll call you when dinner's ready. It shouldn't be more than half an hour. Don't make me come back up here to get you."

"No, sir, I won't, sir." She sent him a snappy salute.

He rolled his eyes. "Smartass."

"I learned it from my daddy, sir."

He left the workshop laughing.

Over dinner, they talked about Keith's recent business trip, and Veronica quitting pep squad and FBLA in favor of journalism and the literary magazine.

"I didn't know you wrote anything more than case files and school reports," Keith said in a casual tone that fooled Veronica not at all.

"I don't. But journalism is an investigatory field, plus I'll get to use my photography skills."

"Which doesn't explain the literary magazine."

"Oh, that's cause I suspect the staff advisor is part of a cult and don't want her to convince any impressionable teenage Neptuners to drink the Kool-Aid before testing the contents to make sure it's really just sugar and food coloring, and not actually cyanide."

"Uh huh. So why did you really join the magazine?"

She rolled her eyes. "A one of the 09er guys dropped off the radar late last school year, and we've since learned he seems to have decided he was the missing star of The Simple Life. I'm doing Logan a favor and checking into things, making it's not anything more serious than the guy finding God or whatever."

Keith frowned. "That still doesn't explain the literary magazine."

"Oh, the guy—Casey Gant—is in the lit mag. Since he's a senior and I don't have any classes with him, it's the only way I can get close to him at school without it being overly suspicious."

"Casey Gant, heir to Gant Publishing? Isn't he kind of an asshole? I remember Lamb saying I should never let you in a car with him, given the number of speeding tickets he's collected."

"That's the one. He sold his Porsche and has moved to some kind of farm commune thing. I'd hunt him up at lunch, but he spends it playing hacky sack with other kids from said farm commune."

"Is that the cult you were referring to?"

"Yep." She popped the P with relish.

"Well, you be careful. If I thought it would do any good, I would say something like, 'Veronica? Do not, under pain of slow, agonizing death, even think about going to the compound yourself.' But it wouldn't do any good, would it?"

"Plausible deniability, Pops!" Veronica said cheerfully.

"Take your taser, keep a sat phone in your car, and you call me if there is anything even remotely suspicious about these people, nous comprenons nous?"

"Mais oui. Gotcha, Frenchie."

"And on the subject of that IED I did not see you building—"

"Alleged IED you did not see me building."

"On the subject of that alleged IED I did not see you building, I don't want to hear about anyone getting hurt from anything remotely explosive."

"You won't."

"Honey, you know Lamb's nose is toasty brown, right? And Fire Chief Bill is a regular at my poker games. If anyone gets hurt, I will find out about it."

"Dad." Veronica stared him straight in the eye, all joking gone from her tone and expression. "If anyone gets hurt, you won't have to ask around because I'd tell you myself."

Keith smiled. "That's my little Robin."

"Dad! I'm Batman!"


AUTHOR'S NOTE: I actually wasn't sure I'd be able to post this on time because my laptop wigged out and had to be reformatted, resulting in the loss of 2.5 chapters of this fic and 2 chapters of another WIP. But I managed to recreate these scenes and am actually happier than I was with them the first time around, and the amazing Irma66 decided to go into goddess mode and bestowed an emergency beta read on my poor unfortunate soul. So here you go! Next update is on 20 December 2018. And don't worry, I am backing up in duplicate this time!