A/N: I added a missing line to the end of the last chapter, sorry about that. Also, I just figured out how to use the long ass line in the FFN text editor. Yeah, I've been on here for years and just learned how to use it. Leave it up to a drunk mind to figure it out. Just typed most of this up with said drunk mind, too.
Done arguing with the gate guard as to why she was signing in two days after entering the village during an attack, Sakura threw the pencil down and walked down the street to a fruit stand fully intent on buying either a sweet apple or a mellow pumello. She deserved something tasty and neutritious, she figured. Fruit was her go-to junk food when recovering from using a lot of chakra over an extended period of time. Two days ago, she had her hands full in ANBU headquarters. Over night she had to get up three more times to tend to the two worst off patients that the hospital could not recieve. Yesterday wasn't as bad, but she had to baby-sit the Hokage all day, slowly pulling poison from his frail veigns that had been introduced through a beverage. The man insisted on continuing to work through reports of the previous day's near-miss with enemy surrounding the village, forcing Sakura to hover around him and do what she could where she could when she could. His constant movement did nothing to make it easier on her.
Today, though, she would go home. She would go home and probably find an empry appartment. Her room mate had yet to check in, and she'd heard no rumors as to where he might be. Even Yamato had no idea. Perhaps there was some skelleton in his closet he had to feed, and this was the first opportunity in a long while. She hoped that was the case, and that she hadn't been yanked away from the one damn time he would need her in these years prior to her original apprenticeship under him.
Looked like she wasn't the only one with a fruit craving. Uchiha Sasuke, whom would be turning eleven soon, was looking over a small carton of cherry tomatoes, basket in hand already containing carrots, celery, bell peppers, and an egg plant.
"Hi, Sasuke-kun," she offered up a greeting, ruffling his hair just because she knew that this was probably the only time she'd get away with it. After all, at this point, he had no idea how to do the things that could kill her. Right now, she could win the fight with an unfortunate snease against him. "How are you today?"
"Fine," he answered shortly, but not unkindly.
"School going good?" she asked, as if she didn't already know he was bored of it.
"What school? We've been off for three days now."
"Oh, right. What have you done to pass the time?"
"Practicing."
"With?"
"Dummies."
"You know," she hesitated. This could present a problem for her in the future, "I could help you with that. A moving target is always better than a dummy."
He looked up to her, sizing her up. "You're old enough to have known Uchiha Itachi. Did you?"
Sakura's lips pursed. She knew what this was about alright, just not where he was going with it. "Briefly. We met briefly."
"Did you ever see him fight? Have you ever been his opponent?"
"I have seen him fight," she answered honestly. "Also, I have faced off against a couple Uchiha in the past... for training, of course. My sensei and his friend used to train against Itachi now and then. They taught me some secrets to winning."
His eyes widened. "Did you use them?"
"Yes," she shrugged. "You don't need to learn them, though. I'll bet that if you ever have to deal with your brother, you'll be able to read him like he reads others. But! You have to promise to set asside one day of the week to train with only me. Got it?"
"I don't believe you."
"You don't have to just yet," she shrugged yet again, checking out the selection of pumellos. "Give me a chance. Just one."
"Today then," he retorted. "Let's get our food, then meet up near the Forrest."
She didn't have to ask which part. Everybody in Konoha called the Forrest of Death simply the Forrest. Everything else was "the woods" or "those trees over there."
"I'll see you there in an hour," she said.
The hour over, and Sakura's suspicions of an empty house confirmed, Sakura met up with Sasuke just outside the fence, deep into the trees. Deciding to let the memories slip by for now, Sakura silently followed Sasuke to where he had been practicing. There were dummies and targets all around. Many marks in them showed that Sasuke had good aim, but only maturation would allow him to penetrate the targets deeper. A boy can only be so strong compared to a young adult.
"You really believe I will face him?" was the first thing Sasuke asked of her.
Sakura sighed, "Sasuke-kun, most people will want to keep you in the dark about him. They'll want to hide you from him, and take him out before he can hurt you anymore. But nobody really knows where he is right now, or what he intends to do. All I know is that for him, you are a loose end. People like him tend to tie up loose ends, right?"
"Right."
"So, it stands that you will possibly, likely, face him again. I want you to have a fighting chance."
"Why do you care? Nobody else does. Everyone thinks they're going to protect me."
"I won't." Sakura stated flatly, biting off the rest of her comment about him needing to distract Itachi from Naruto later on. "I will, however, help you to defend yourself."
"How?"
Great, back to the one word expressions again. "It's simple. You're smaller than him still, smaller than me, even. So we need to work on teaching you to unbalance someone of his height. If you bring the fight down lower, you'll have the advantage. We're going to work on ju-jutsu."
Day three had passed since the attack. After a quick check up on Sandaime-sama, Sakura was dismissed for the day. It seemed a search party had found Kakashi being dragged back to Konoha by his pack of ninken. Two broken feet and a sprained wrist made sure he wasn't in the mood to walk. The lump on the back of his head made it rather disorientating to try to crawl home. Pakkun had been sent to look for her, but she was everywhere but where she normally was when the dog checked for her. When he traced her scent down to ANBU, he wasn't allowed inside despite his master's status.
Right now, he was supposed to be at home, in bed, resting.
So, when she entered the place to fing him doing pull ups on the back porch, Sakura couldn't help the urge to scold him. Nor could she stop that urge from fading into giggles when her entrance startled him into dropping down on his ass with a thud.
"Shut up and help me up," he ordered sullenly.
"Yes, sir, Kakashi, sir!" she mocked, happy to grab him by his good hand and haul him up onto newly mended feet that were still tender.
Without prompting, Sakura lead him, slowly, back inside and into the living room. She sat him on one end of the couch and pulled his feet into her lap at the other end, healing chakra already going strong as she finished mending and de-sensetizing his damaged nerve endings, things normal medics couldn't or wouldn't bother with.
Kakashi moaned, "Thank you."
"Of course," she wispered, rubbing out a muscle cramp that had developed in his left calf. "Hand. Now, please."
He lazily offered his right wrist to her, propping up on his left elbow rather than trying to just sit straight up. The wrist was much better healed, but she rubbed it, his hand, and his forearm out anyway. During all this, she was checking him over for anything else that might have been missed. If it wasn't obvious or life-threatening, Kakashi had a way of making it not be there to anyone's knowledge. Except, she could always tell. Like she could tell that he had a slightly cracked nose right now, just through the small spiderweb of chakra she sent through his system to check everything all at once. With a purse of her lips, she yanked down his mask at the ears and pressed one healing finger to the bridge of his nose before he could protest, then backed off just as quickly.
Kakashi leaned back in the cusions again, looking at her with his mask still off. "I heard what you did for Ibiki and Tenzo and the others."
"Well, I certainly wasn't useless for once."
"You're not useless." he corrected. "Don't you ever say that again. I'll punch you, hard, if I ever hear you say that again."
Sakura blushed, thinking back to the last time they saw one another. "I'd deserve it anyway, after what I did to you."
"Technically, I deserved that. I was wrong. You saved the lives of my friends and collegues singlehandedly. And then you took care of Sandaime-sama. Now you're soothing me when I don't deserve it. You're some kind of amazing. You know that?"
"Are you doped up on pain killers or something?" she asked, very unused to hearing him talk like this.
"Do you honestly think I'd take them if they offered?" he deadpanned. "I mean it. You've made yourself useful to the Hokage, paid a lot of my bills, saved lives others would have called it quits on the moment they were brought in... And you welcome me home like nothing happened, like it's just another day. Actually, no. It's not just another day. You're actually taking care of my little bumps and bruises as if they matter. You're one scary woman."
"Scary?"
"Yes. You're treating me good. That's strange."
"I care about you," she answered softly. "I also know when you're hiding an injury that doesn't seem like much to you, but actually gets in the way no matter how you try to put it off. With what happened, I want you in top shape if it happens again soon."
"Is there cause for concern for that?" he asked, tensing up.
"Not that I'm aware of," she shook her head, patting his knee.
"Good," he sighed. "The farther I went after them, the stronger they got. The boys"-he meant his ninken-"had to protect me for a while. Over used the Sharingan after getting hit in the head. Fell out of a tree on my way back and broke both feet. It sucked hard."
"I bet," she smiled, but then did a double take. "Wait... How many days ago was that? When did you use your Sharingan?"
"Three days ago. Why?"
"You're already moving?"
"Yes...?"
Wow. Just. In two years time, he will have used that eye so much that it would put him down for a week after using it. How was it less than three days now? What was coming that she didn't know about as a kid?
"I was already low on chakra, if that helps answer whatever you're not really asking me," he provided. "I used it for about all of three seconds, maybe."
Sakura sighed. That made sense. It was pretty much a regular chakra drain, and, at this point, Kakashi really hadn't stretched the limits of his chakra control or bothered building up his reserves much. That would come after they lost Sasuke.
"Oh, by the way, I'm taking a day a week to teach Sasuke how to wrestle."
"Why?" Kakashi's eyes went wide.
"It gives him hope," Sakura said softly. "He's scared because everybody tells him he's never going to match up to Itachi-san. I told him that nobody could keep Itachi away if he wanted to get to him, but, since Sasuke is shorter, he should learn to bring tall opponents down to his level and lower. That way he'd have an advantage. Since Itachi is used to being on top of any fight, it would throw him off."
"You know if Itachi comes back, it won't be for Sasuke," Kakashi mentioned. "I'm sure you know it's the jinchuriki who are being hunted right now."
"Yeah, but Sasuke needs to have hope. We're going to need him to save Naruto, and we'll need Naruto to save Sasuke. So... don't let them kill each other when we become a team, okay?"
"It gets that bad?"
"Yeah."
"Why would I pass them?"
"You'll just have to trust me," she smiled saddly, hoping not to start another arguement. It just looked like it was going that way anyway.
Instead, Kakashi just kept his mouth shut. He just shut up and stared at her for a while. What he was thinking, Sakura couldn't guess, but she could see his eyes flit here and there over her frame. He looked at the scar on her shoulder at least twice. He followed the muscle lines in her arms back and forth. He looked over the light callouses she refused to allow to grow too much on her hands. He studied the slight variances in her hair color. His eyes ghosted over her lips, nose, jaw, forehead... Then they locked onto her eyes again. By this point, he seemed relaxed.
"What are you thinking about?" she asked, honestly curious.
"When's the last time you took a shower?"
Sakura blinked a couple times. "What? Do I smell?"
"It's been over a week for me," he admitted, ignoring her question as he swung his legs off of hers and stood up, grabbing her hand in the process. "Come on. We could use a shower."
"We?" he voice went up as she stumbled after him. "You can have your shower while I make dinner..."
"Nope," he shook his head. "We can make dinner after our shower."
Sakura's heart was racing. Just what was he going on about this singular shower for the both of them? He never made food with her after bathing, either. One would shower, the other would make food. It was rare for the both of them to do anything together anymore. Now, all of a sudden, he not only wanted her to wait to make food with him, but he wanted to share the shower? How the hell was she supposed to keep it together in the shower with him? She hadn't had sex in a couple years, and he was young and handsome and fit and...
Oh hell, the bathroom door was closed behind her! He was already stripping his shirt and turning on the water. There she was standing like a deer in a bright light as he pulled off his socks and pants.
"Yo, Sakura, arm's up," he commanded.
"Huh?" she asked, meeting his eyes again, having caught herself looking at his chest and abs, drifting a little lower to the top of his underwear. Wait... Were those staying on? She had mixed feelings about that. If they stayed on, she could keep it together. If they came off, she'd either have to run or stay and be totally embarrassed about being totally turned on the entire time they were in the room together. Oh, who was she kidding, the process was already started.
"I don't have anything you haven't seen before," he reminded her, putting a finger under her chin to raise her gaze back on his. "I've seen a few naked women myself, so it's not like anything you have is going to be a shock to me."
Shock, not at all. Also, she had seen him fully naked a couple times... when he was fifteen years older and starting to soften around the edges and getting a few wrinkles and the start of crow's feet. Yeah, even then he was attractive enough to get her off the first time they had sex. Hell, to be honest, even before that she had been known to get in an evening work out with him, then mastrubate in the bath later to images of him working on the punching bag, or the light touches when they sparred light contact, no chakra allowed. Oh dear. And, if the Hokage himself were to strip down, she wouldn't be shocked at what she saw, but that didn't mean she'd be turned on either. Sure, Sakura's body wouldn't shock Kakashi, after all he had seen her in her underwear and a string bikini by now, but that didn't mean he wouldn't like what he saw. Gods help her if he liked what he saw as much as she liked what she saw right now.
She couldn't promise to keep all the light touches they were bound to have now innocent. They'd have to touch here and there when switching who got to rinse off.
"Sakura," he smiled knowingly at her. "I'm not asking for anything other than a shower together. I just... I don't know. I want to have a shower with you. I feel like I owe you a helping hand with washing your back and hair or something after what you did for me earlier."
"O...oh," she shook herself out of her thoughts, focusing again on his eyes. Right. Those gray and red, gentle, happy eyes. Yes, for the first time in a long time, she saw relaxation and happiness in his eyes.
Sakura promptly lifted her arms and allowed him to pull her shirt off. Once the water was flowing hot and steamy, they shucked their underwear and got under the hot spray, first Sakura, then Kakashi. As he soaked, Sakura grabbed for the shampoo, but he beat her to it, motioning for her to turn around. With her back to him, it was far easier to pretend it was only her in the shower, until his fingers began working the shampoo into her scalp, especially at the base of her skull. Oh that felt good! Then he wouldn't move for her to rinse it out. No, instead he pulled the detatchable head down and rinsed it out with careful motions, making sure none got into her eyes. The process was calmly, silently repeated with the conditioner. He handed her her loofa to wash her own body with while he took care of his hair quickly, but stopped her when she got to her back. He took that chore away, and then he carried it down her sides, down her hips, all the way to her ankles and back up again. Sakura heard, strangly, a hitch in his breath as he came back up and grazed the side of her breast. She chose to let it go and reached above his head, arching backwards to keep from looking at him, for the shower head to rinse off with.
Kakashi had his ass firmly planted against the wall of the shower to keep her from brushing up against his body. He thought he could do this. He really thought he could take a half-step into a closer relationship with her. Nope. His damn penis decided it really wanted to override his brain today. Her ass was the perfect heart shape, and her medium sized breasts were silky smooth. That seemed to be all it took to get him going. He had half a stiffy, damn it.
Before she could turn around, he had grabbed the loofa, soaped it up and turned to face away from her to wash himself off. Sakura kept quiet as she replaced the shower head, grabbed the soap and just rubbed it on his back straight forward. Did she really have to put those little hands right into every sore spot and make it feel better? Couldn't she at least leave him one to focus on instead of her body? Nope. She worked right down to the top of his ass, then pressed a coupld pressure points in the sides of his ass cheeks, alerting him to pain he didn't know he had. On the one hand, it felt great to know she was still thinking medically. On the other, his mind was all about having a set of her fingers wrapped around his shaft right now. Woudn't it be just great to get rid of this damn stiffy here in the shower where it would all rinse down the drain? If only she would just reach around and jerk him off and forget it happened? Yeah, she was a medic, after all. She knew about the pain a man would suffer with blue balls.
Shit. It was so much harder to think himself out of an erection when she reached for the shower head again, rubbing her breasts and crotch against his back and ass in the process.
"Oh hell, I got more soap on me," she muttered, proceeding to rinse herself off again before turning the spray onto him. "Turn around so I can get the front."
"Um..." was all he could utter, staring down at his own dick.
"What?"
"You uh... I will rinse myself. I still need to shave, so... Dinner? Can you set out what you want?"
"Plan backfiring, Kakashi?" she teased, knowing.
"Yep."
"Turn around anyway," she coaxed, putting a hand on his shoulder and gently pulling. "Like you said, you don't have anything I haven't seen before."
"Did you enjoy it?" he asked, blushing so hard she could see it in his neck and back. "When you um... with me?"
Now that took more effort than it should have, she thought. They were both adults here. Why was he worried? "Of course I did. It was fast, but that's how we both needed it at the time."
"Oh."
"Turn around, Kakashi, please. I promise not to bite... well, not for blood anyway."
He sighed and turned, stiffy starting to deflate a little due to the pause and conversation. Sakura refused to look at his crotch, instead focusing on just rinsing him off from chest to waist. Initially, she meant to stop there and let him get the rest, but the urge to just get this done and over with had built back up inside her. It would benefit them both if they just fucked the hell out of one another for a night, she figured. Sex was healthy, after all.
So she rinsed him off the rest of the way, but didn't let him turn around to grab a razor before reaching up and putting the shower head away, making sure to again graze her breasts and crotch against him. Sure, she could have handed it to him to put up, but that would defeat the purpose. Sakura could feel his heartbeat racing through their light contact right before he made the decision to just grab her by the ass, pull her up and kiss her hard on the mouth. He kept kissing at her mouth and throat until seconds after her back hit the wall, feet coming to rest on the edges of the tub for support.
"Do you really want this," Kakashi asked, voice pitched low, eyes locked onto hers, finger stroking a wet lock of hair away from her cheek. "I want this. I want you to know that... Just answer me. Do you want me inside of you?"
"The shower is dangerous," she whispered, thinking critically now of all times. "Can we do it in the hall?"
Ah, yes. Showers were dangerous, and the hall had soft carpeting with thick padding that would benefit them both far more than a porcelain tub or ceramic tiles. Kakashi kicked the water off, and picked her up again. This time, she wrapped her legs around him and supported herself for the most part. He half thought and grabbed a towel to wrap around her dripping body, then went on auto pilot and walked them both into his bedroom instead of stopping in the hall.
"You still haven't said yes," he reminded, a little bit of logic working its way back in again. "Do you want me inside of you?"
"Yes," she answered with more of a breath than a voice.
He didn't remember how he ended up kneeling between her legs, but he was there and enjoying the view already. With one hand, he made sure to caress her thigh before bringing it higher and hooking her heel on his shoulder. He brought that hand back down again to dragg a finger tip across her core, stopping to play with her clit a moment until she bucked against him. Dipping lower again, he felt the heat and the wetness beginning to seep out. Damn, she was ready fast. A couple pumps of his dick in his hand, and he was ready again too.
Sakura wasn't sure which happened first. Did he kiss her and then plunge his dick inside, or was his dick sliding inside her walls just before his mouth pried hers open? It didn't really matter which, because he seated himself inside her slowly, and kissed her deeply. It wasn't rough and eager like she was expecting. No, he was taking his time. He was trailing kisses over her cheeks and under her jaw as he pulled out again, slowly, gently. He went a bit fast as his hand caught her breast, bumping into her enough to move her whole body, but went still again. His hand moved down her side, playing with the unmarred skin there, swirling over her belly button as he began to pull out again.
Sakura watched her lower abdomen distort slightly with each languid thrust. The pressure of his penis inside her channel actually raised the skin outside her body, showing his depth and thickness as it nearly reached her belly button over and over again, stretching her inside, pressing into her cervix. It was slightly painful, but that only added to the pleasure of knowing they were feeling each other's bodies as clearly and intimately as possible. She could feel the sweat starting to form on him, not just the water droplets. He was concentrating, telling her that they didn't need to rush today. They had time, for once, and he wanted to make the best of it.
"Sakura, look at me," he commanded, voice almost dangerous.
"I am," she said honestly, eyes trailing from their joining up his stomach, across his chest and shoulders to his throat, stubble covered chin, slack mouth, and eyes that were clearly trying to say something important.
"Touch me."
"I am." Indeed she was. The leg that wasn't thrown over his shoulder was snaked around his thigh, pulling him in closer with each thrust, the hand he wasn't gripping and steadying himself on was trailing his ribs, gripping hard with each new penetration.
But, when her eyes met his again, he started a steady rythm sure to stare right back in her eyes the whole time.
Sakura could feel it coming. It wasn't going to be one of those over the top orgasims, but she was definitely going to cum for him this time. It hit slow and grew in intensity as he picked up the pace, peaking out when he latched onto her throat. When he felt a small squirt of warm liquid hit his balls, Kakashi let go, hard and fast he came, and Sakura kept on going, slow and steady. She was still cumming a little when he finished and pulled out. Feeling her still clinging hard around him, he decided to suckle at her breast a little, teasing her clit with his fingers until she arched off the bed and came harder. He backed off, but Sakura rolled on her side, throwing her leg over his hip to press her groin to his again, making sure to shower him with kisses now.
"Fuck," he hissed, the coolness of the water and sweat clinging to his body catching up to him. "Now we have to wash off again."
"No we don't," she shook her head. "We just need to rinse off, shave, and go make dinner."
"You can really think about all that right now?"
"Yes, but I'm going to need help walking back to the shower. My legs are shaking. You made me cum longer than I thought possible."
Kakashi chuckled lowly, grinning like an idiot.
Finishing their shower and eating dinner was a quiet affair. This time, though, they didn't eat at the table. They got cuddled up on the couch and turned on the radio. It was some talk show they barely listened to, instead choosing to feed each other bites of food and then curl around one another for a nap.
Kakashi woke up first, detecting a small change in Sakura's heartbeat. It happened again a moment later, then evened out... matching his own. He knew because he could no longer feel a difference between them, but he could see her pulse in her neck. Then his skipped a beat and the spell was broken. They were close to the same rythm, but not exact anymore. This got him thinking. People said things like that happened when it was true love. He just wasn't sure if he truely loved her. If she woke up and told him she loved him, he wouldn't have an answer for her. No, he couldn't answer. If he ever said out loud that he even cared about her, it would put her at risk. Him openly caring about anyone was generally a death sentence for the other person. He oculdn't do that to her. Not her.
Panic started to set in. He replayed this afternoon in his mind over again. Kakashi knew he was an idiot. Even though she had said yes, he should not have touched her. He was an idiot for thinking he could keep it together in the shower. Those light touches, after two years of no sexual contact, felt too damn good. Then what the hell did he do? He got off inside her, with no damn condom. He'd poured himself straight into her tight warmth without a second thought. The happiness of knowing she had made it home okay washed out all logic, replacing it with a primal drive to just be inside of her, to physically show her how he felt about her still being there with him.
Kakashi slowly extricated himself from her embrace and walked to his bedroom to find some clothes. If he stayed there any longer, wrapped in her naked warmth, his body was bound to react again. Natural, primal instinct feld damn good to follow, but it was the way wrong move for him right now. Clothes firmly secured in all the right places, mask up, hitai-ate in place over his left eye, Kakashi quickly scribbled a note telling her he went out for a walk. He wanted to treat his pack to a lazy evening in the park, or so that was his excuse. Leaving the radio on, he locked the door quietly behind himself and headded straight for the hospital.
He couldn't say anything to Gai, or Asuma, or anybody else Sakura might end up having regular contact with over the next few days. Those people would probably be coming by to check in on him, probably having heard that he'd had a head injury despite the fact that it wasn't all that serious. No. He had to see Tenzo. Tenzo would know how to help him re-detatch from Sakura without hurting her too badly.
Entering the man's room through the door really got Tenzo's attention. Sure, there was a window, but Kakashi wasn't sure which one was his yet, so he had to check things out from the inside first. Looking at his kohai, Kakashi simply sat in the chair and stayed sitting straight up.
"What happened?" Tenzo whispered. Breathing too deeply hurt a lot right now. "You look like somebody died."
"I fucked up."
"Who?" Tenzo always knew it came down to a who, never a what, with Kakashi.
"Sakura; the woman who saved your life."
Tenzo struggled to sit himself up in the bed. "You killed her?"
"No!" Kakashi waved his hands between them. "No... I... I had sex with her."
"Okay... How is that a fuck up?"
"She lives with me. We did it all nartural. I think... I think I'm starting to..."
"Hyperventilate?" he suggested, smirking. Kakashi lost for words was a rare sight.
Kakashi shot him a dirty look.
"Oh. You love her."
"Yeah. That." he admitted grudgingly.
"So? Problem?"
"I'm not a family man, idiot."
"That didn't stop you from exchanging letters with my sister."
"I never had sex with her, and writing letters doesn't mean having a family."
"Not what she told me."
"Please explain how I could have ever had sex with your sister if we were never even in the same country at the same time."
"Oh," Tenzo looked down. Kakashi had got him there.
"My point is," Kakashi brought things back on topic, "I've only been out of the game for two years, and I don't know how to detatch from this one. She lives with me, and she's adamant about being at less than arm's length."
Such relationships were dangerous for any shinobi, ANBU especially. Kakashi was not an ANBU anymore, but he still didn't quite know how to cope outside of those paramaters. He still kept two "go bags" at the ready at home. He still occasionally visited personal escape locations in other countries when a mission permitted him to be close enough anyway. He still ducked into corners to henge into someone else, then send a clone of his normal self ahead just to check for tails. He made sure to keep up with three day fasting once a month to make sure he could do it if need be. He snuck in work outs and training as play with Maito Gai or finding new positions to perch in for longer periods of time above the heads of oblivious passers-by. He tested his skills at breaking into the ANBU headquarters, the prison, and the Hokage's home and office and re-arranging the occupants' belongings without setting off alarms or being caught. He even broke into a bank three times to take money from his own safety-deposit box and transfer it into one being kept for Uzumaki Naruto, then snuck out again just in time. And, yes, he did occasionally help kids get their cat back or an old woman with her shopping. Angry cats up high telephone poles were good training for avoiding injury in dangerous locations. Old women, especially those with grandkids, could shop and shop and shop, leading to a kind of weight training mixed with a new kind of balancing act. Kakashi found ways to work training and stealth and speed into every day whether or not he was on a mission. He only seemed lazy because he only ever got caught after these activities during a rest period. Still, he never allowed himself to fully commit to anyone for any reason. If the Hokage ordered it, he would kill Tenzo on the spot, even now.
But Sakura?
He let her sleep next to him. He let her cook for him. He let her bring a child into his home for a while. He enjoyed cooking for her. He enjoyed the scented shampoo she used. He had come to rely on her presence after a nightmare to ground him in the present reality again. He was scared when he came home to an empy place. He was elated when she caught him working out that afternoon. He let her see his face daily. He had bare sex with her. He had to force himself to leave her alone at home. He'd rather be there with her than anywhere else in the world. He'd rather be sitting at the kitchen table drinking tea and wearing nothing but a towel while she talked about how much more dilligent of a Hokage the Sandaime was than the Godaime or the Rokudaime would be.
He'd rather watch her curl up with Bull and the rest of the pack around them while they all watched a movie together, maybe even fall asleep that way. He could see all of them together on the floor filling up on cheese puffs and popcorn and penuts. Urushi would get the worst gass. Shiba would yawn a lot. Pakkun would fall asleep on his chest. Sakura would fall asleep on Bull. Bisuke would use Sakura's butt as a pillow. Akino would lick her feet raw by morning. Uhei and Guruko would fight over who slept in Kakashi's lap. Guruko would win and Uhei would curl up by his head instead, then snore all night.
"Earth to Kakashi-senpai," Tenzo waved a hand infront of Kakashi's eye. "What just happened there? You're not one for day-dreaming."
"See," Kakashi pointed out, "she's had that affect on me, too."
"Well, I'm glad you're not with us anymore if this is what you've become."
"It should be you," Kakashi dropped his shoulders a little more. "You're the one who should be feeling this stuff. I don't want it. You said you did."
"And I do," he agreed. "I want at least five more years in ANBU first, though. Remember, senpai, I'm only trailing behind you because I was born four years later. I'm going to out live and out perform you! Then, I'm going to have more kids than you, too!"
Tenzo realized his mistake a split second after the words exited his mouth. Kakashi tensed up again, looking frightened the instant Tenzo had said "kids."
"Look," he placed a comforting hand on Kakashi's shoulder. "This woman is the highest caliber medic I've ever come across. The amount of work she did the other day on her own would have dropped three normal medics in half the time. If she doesn't want kids, or knows you don't, there won't be any. She won't let herself get pregnant. Whether through jutsu or through normal female contraceptives, she will have been using protection."
"You don't understand..." Kakashi shook his head. "The most I can say is this. The Hokage had her move in with me because he wants to see my family line continued. She is very aware of this."
"Is she not aware of your dislike of children?"
"She is."
"Has she ever intentionally harmed you?"
"No."
"Then I believe she respects your wishes. She'll want to butter you up to the idea with more time. She should know a bit about you by now. If she does, she knows it's going to take a lot longer to break you into the idea of having a family. Right now, if you want, since you're not ANBU anymore, you, her, and your pack can be a family."
Kakashi resisted the urge to ask him if he was a mind-reader. "I don't want a family. Ever."
Tenzo frowned. "And here I thought you were being groomed to become Hokage one day."
Kakashi frowned. "Don't remind me. You're welcome to the position if you want."
"The only thing that might get me there is if you die. If you try to kill yourself, I'll find Sakura-san and send her to you're dumb ass in time."
Kakashi chuckled a little. "Thanks. You're no help at all today."
True to his word, Kakashi could be found in the park. He had three other clones of himself, each with two balls. All eight of his ninken pack were present and playing fetch. He had explained it once as a kind of relay race for them. Doing this tested their endurance as much as it stretched his chakra control. It was training hidden behind a game for all of them. If this was a lazy evening, Sakura would hate to see what the idea of a hard workout would be. Then again, they may not have been at this long. They could have all gotten bored and decided upon this instead.
"Ah, there you are," Kakashi smiled up at her, eye forming that closed happy line it did when he smiled his biggest. "Feel up for a jog around the loop with us? The boys were just getting warmed up for it."
The loop was the outter most path of this particular park. One lap was about two and a half miles. Sakura had jogged her way here from five miles already, and some of the dogs were beginning to pant a little hard. It seemed Kakashi was being a bit of a liar when he said they were only getting warmed up. So, instead, she pointed at the river.
"I say it is a hot enough day out for a swim instead," she called out loud enough for even Shiba, the ninken the farthest away, could hear clearly.
A swim would serve two purposes. It would continue the cardio work out, but cool off the dogs and her.
"Then, we can go home, dry off, and order some take-out and watch a movie. What do you guys say?" she asked all of them. "I brought home two big jars of peanut butter and six bags of cheese puffs just for you guys before I came here today."
Lots of whines and "please boss"'s filled the air in Kakashi's direction. Damn, but that woman had stolen his dogs, too... And, what was the deal with the movie watching day-dream earlier? He didn't know where it came from, but it seemed like a real memory. Then Tenzo had picked up on it. Now Sakura was suggesting it, almost exactly as he'd envisioned. Well, at least she and he would be dozing off separately. With the audience of the ninken pack, he would be less tempted to have sex with her. Yeah, why the hell not?
Kakashi dispelled the three clones and sprinted for the water, leaving his nine companions behind, and dove in. He had hit the water before the rest of them took that as permission and agreement on his part.
Of course, neither Sakura nor Kakashi had thought about one thing. They had six towels for the two of them and eight wet dogs. When they got home, still dripping wet since the sun had gone down before they got out of the river, Kakashi was at a loss as to what to do. Sakura came up with the answer. The dogs stayed outside until both she and Kakashi were sufficiently dried and changed clothes. At that point, she took a couple box fans and plugged them in on the back deck Two dogs each could dry themselves there while she and Kakashi took towels to the remaining four. Six towels and two fans dried ten individuals perfectly.
And then the power went out.
"Well, we could have a cook out instead," Kakashi suggested.
"We should probably go see what is going on with the power." Sakura said instead.
"If there was a problem, there would be some noise by now," he shrugged it off. "Come on. I'm sure the boys and I can listen to your stories about your team."
Sakura looked at him like he was an idiot.
"Just some light ones that don't involve me. Please?"
Sakura sighed. "Get the sausages from the freezer. I'll get the fire wood lit."
Smiling, he headed for the fridge. Looking inside, he decided to bring the case of beer, too. First, it would help him forget any slips she made. Two, it would help her feel better about talking.
Of course, by the time they cracked open their second cans, the power came back on, but nobody in the Hatake house cared. Sakura was starting to talk about the time Naruto decided to borrow some shampoo from Sasuke. What he failed to realize was that it wasn't shampoo, but hair styling gel. He read the instructions and applied it to his damp hair... all of his damp hair. His leg hairs, arm hairs, and crotch hairs were all glued to his clothes in five minutes, and his hair stuck out on end worse than Kakashi's. They made him walk the rest of the day like that, all the way home before he got to wash it off.
Lying on their backs, the fire dimming, the two stared up at the stars. Kakashi was the first to note the cluster of new stars in the sky near Leo's front paw.
"There they are," he breathed out.
"Hmm?" Sakura asked, not understanding the sudden downturn in his mood.
"Every time someone dies, a new star shows for three weeks in the sky," he explained. "When people die together, their stars end up near each other. Look there. There are the people who died the other night. Our enemies and comrads are together in the afterlife."
"Why would they be together? Is it because they died together?"
"No," he sighed. "It's because they had a common purpose in life and died close together. In the afterlife, I doubt the nation which one served has any meaning. Only that you served."
"That makes life kinda pointless, don't you think?"
"Maybe..."
"But it's not. You know that, right? Our lives, however seemingly insignificant in the short term, are meant for something. Every person has a role to play. Without the smaller roles, the big ones loose meaning. We are going to win out. Every nation is going to win out. We just have to have faith and survive in the mean time."
"No," he sighed, looking to her. "We have to keep getting stronger. We have to live to see the better days. It's up to us to make the days better. If we don't get stronger than our current enemies, the victory you speak of will never happen."
Sakura thought back to the days after Sasuke left her on that damned bench. Yes. If she had remained weak, she would not have survived the war. As a testement to that, when they brought Sasuke home, she demolished that bench with one pinky toe, then threw the remains over the walls. She saved one piece of wood from it and used it to clober Sasuke's face a couple times before they hauled his unconscious form to the jail nurse's station to recouperate.
And him? If he had chosen to leave the path of a shinobi when his father was disgraced, he could have lead a happier life. It would have been easier, by far. He could have laid down arms when Obito died, when Rin died, when Minato died. He could have cowered away from the Akatsuki when Asuma-sensei was killed, or, before that, when Sandaime-sama was murdered. But, no. He used these things to fill the fire in his soul, the fire that burned to make those deaths continue to mean something to those around him, to the world. He used them to fuel his own desire to train harder, to keep on top of the game, and protect those around him.
Right now, Sakura didn't care about all that. She prayed for the souls of the dead, that they might find peace and not end up in the woes of the coming years.
"I never did find Minato-sensei's star."
Kakashi's voice brought her out of her thoughts.
"I never found his or Obito's. Rin's, though... that one hung around for only one night, then became a shooting star. It means she's watching over someone still alive. I wonder, now, if that person is you."
"I doubt it," she found her voice now. In the years to come, Kakashi would tell her once, and only once, about seeing Rin durring the war. He told them all, specifically, that it had been Obito that Rin watched over the whole time.
"Why?"
"From what I understand, her mother taught her to envy me," Sakura sighed ruefully. "I had our father and my mother. She only had her mother, and that was only up until a couple years after I was born. My father was upset that she and I could never grow close. He was happy to have had two kunoichi daughters."
"Yeah, sure... until I killed one," Kakashi shot out. "I wonder how the hell I'm supposed to face him when I meet him again."
"Why would you see him again?"
"It is customary for a Jonin-sensei to meet the families of his genin team prior to their fist meeting. It is meant as a reminder that they are human, someone's baby, precious to Konoha as individuals and to remember that when shaping them into tools. The full humanity is not meant to be tempered out of them unless they are marked for ANBU early on, like my kohai, Tenzo. I was, too, but my father and my sensei refused to allow it. I had family to protect me from Tenzo's fate... as do you. Sasuke-kun does not. I am the only one who can make the assessment on whether or not he should be held back or advanced quickly."
"What? Why you? Are they considering him right now? Already? He's only nine-years-old!"
"Tenzo began that path when he was three. The Nii-daime had his eye on me when I was four and passed that on to the Sandaime, but my sensei and my father refused to allow it after I graduated two years later."
"But, that's too young for such a consideration!" Sakura sat up, hovering over him.
"Not for the two of us," Kakashi shook his head. "Sakura, we grew up in a time when adult shinobi were in short supply, and children like us were considered more precious than the sun. Konoha had two genious level, skilled, strong for their size todlers biting at the bit to be as strong as the male role-models they grew up with. I had my father, and Jiraiya-sama to watch every day. Tenzo had Danzo and Orochimaru to look up to. All four were legendary men, and we were their protoge."
"Well, Yamato-taichou was more of their creation than their student," Sakura interjected.
"How do you know that?" he narrowed his eyes.
"Just something Orochimaru-sama said once. It was the first time I'd seen him in three years. Yamato-taichou was on his first mission with us, and we had to improvise to lure Orochimaru-sama out into the open. When he recognized taichou, he said he would have liked to see how that old experiment worked out, but didn't have time or something like that. Taichou explained it to us later that he only got mokuton because he was a part of Orochimaru's experiments as a child. That had to be the scariest thing for a kid. Don't you think?"
He nodded once. "Yeah. For me, it would have been, but Tenzo wasn't taught to distrust him like I was. In fact, before Orochimaru took him away, he was taught that the Sannin would save his clan from destruction. Orochimaru fed them all with lies about keeping them safe from themselves, from their technique that would kill them if used too much."
"Did he save them?"
"No." he shook his head, looking away. "Only Tenzo and his sister survived. I haven't heard from her in almost a year. She's traveled far from the shinobi nations now. It's her mission to see the world. She wants to see all of it, all the pretty things, and all the good things she can find. She's your age, but has the most upbeat, happy, naieve thought process. I envy that woman, even if she commandeered my body for a while and beat up my insides. It was worth it to see her escape fate."
"How sweet of you," Sakura smiled, then leaned down to kiss the corner of his lips.
Kakashi stopped all movements, even held his breath. Him? Sweet? Besides playing fetch in the park with the pack, or reading Jiraiya's novels, his favorite past time was taking the pack hunting. Not just any hunting, but deep in enemy territory, hunting other ANBU. He liked to listen as their screams turned to gargles as they choked on their own blood after one of the ninken ripped into their throats. He would do this on or off the books, pretty much whenever the mood struck. Did she know that about him? Probably not.
Sakura was a healer. If she had nightmares about anything, she took the time to tend to others in order to calm herself down. When he had nightmrares, he woke up ready to kill. She knew that, but she didn't know that the nightmares could sometimes keep him awake for days on end. When that happened - though rare - he would only be able to feed into the emotion, let his mind fill up with the sounds of the enemy dying instead of... instead of reliving Minato-sensei, Rin-chan, or Obito-baka in their dying moments. New nightmares would be created for a short time, and they would be peaceful bliss in comparison to the usual nightly torment. Then his mind would ease off again, allowing him to have semi-normal dreams for months on end. This last time,...
Had he really only had a handful of nightmares in the last couple years? Had it really been over two years since the last time he unleashed like that? What changed?
Oh... Her...
For the first time, Kakashi embraced the butterflies welling up in the pit of his stomach as he locked eyes with the woman above him. She really had changed him on some inner level, hadn't she? Sure, when he fought, he still fought to win, to live, but he wasn't fighting for the lust of it anymore. He wasn't interested in the activities that made sure his bounty kept rising in the BINGO books since she showed up.
Instead, Kakashi was more interested in not disturbing her as she slept. He wanted to fall asleep to the sound of her breathing. He wanted to share a pot of tea in the morning, quietly watching the sunrise and the village wake up around them. He actually wanted more C rank missions, just to keep a positive cash flow into his bank account. C ranks were more of a vacation for him, and he wanted to bring her along now. The missions he thought Sandaime-sama was putting them on together as punishment really weren't that bad, just boring.
"If you hold your breath any longer, your lips will start turning blue," Sakura warned. "My breath can't smell that bad, can it?"
Oh... Maybe that storm of butterflies really had turned into a burning sensation in his lungs now. Kakashi sucked in a couple lung-fulls of air before reaching up to pull her into a more direct kiss, then laid back and let his fingers rest on her shoulder.
"What was that for?" she asked, startled, but smiling.
"Thanks," he smiled up at her, maskless face showing off a handsome, yet goofy grin. "Just thanks."
"For reminding you to breathe?"
"Yeah, sure." he shrugged it off, then sat up. "How about we call it a night?"
A/N: Okay, so now I have decided to attempt to spell check this thing... Still drunk here. Please, somebody help me spell check this... I think I did okay, but numb fingers don't help typos much.
Also, the story about the hair gel is based on something that happened to my husband recently. I accidentally convinced him to shower with hair gel. Then he drove our (stick shift) car across town. I got an ear full of "I showered with WHAT? Are my pubes gonna get hard, TOO?" not long after.
