Author's Notes: I am so sorry for the delay! You see, dear readers, when I get stressed or otherwise emotionally disturbed, I'm very bad at being able to determine it. One of my big clues is when I try writing and when I read it later, I find that whatever I wrote made absolutely no sense. Case in point, I was proofreading something and found the line "but one this is no maybe." This sentence makes no sense in context or out of context, and that told me I really needed to turn my brain off for awhile. So I did! So that's why I disappeared. It had nothing to do with this story and everything to do with the fact that I was speaking in tongues. Hopefully I'm back to a regular schedule!


Chapter Nine

"Hey," said a scowling Pepper, giving me a minor heart attack. It was after maths, which was a high-stress situation for me anyhow, but now I had to worry that Pepper was going to hurt me. "We need to get things." She furtively glanced around before leaning in and whispering, "Accessories for formal."

Oh Lord. Admittedly I was still in denial about going to formal, but at least I had an in to ask Pepper about Adam now. "True. When do you want to go?"

"Sunday night," she said, still frowning.

"Sounds acceptable. What's wrong?"

She looked surprised, as if just finding out she'd been glaring at me. "Oh. Nothing's wrong."

"Of course," I said, not believing her for a second. We'd talk more on Sunday, regardless. I wasn't looking forward to it, because if nothing else, I had a sinking suspicion she was just mad that I spent so much time with Adam. It's certainly not my fault that I know rudimentary Latin…

Ah well. My schedule for the next couple of days seemed clear and easy: school, homework, gaming on Saturday (we were going to finally win!), and shopping on Sunday.

Of course things couldn't end up working out that nicely. My organised plan completely fell apart beginning that night.

My father had been stuck at work, so it was me alone. The doorbell rang repeatedly and there was quick, loud knocking at the door. Realising that the only things dangerous to me couldn't come in unless I invited them, I opened the door; Anthony was standing there, looking as harried as I'd ever seen him. He wasn't even wearing his shades. He came in quickly, locking the door behind him. "What's wrong?" I asked, worried. He was usually far more composed.

"They're coming for me," he said, glancing around warily. "I need your help."

I felt a rush of warmness. He was trusting me to help him! Aww. I was wary of whatever was chasing him, but I figured he wouldn't have asked for my help if he thought I was going to die too. "Of course, dear, what do you need? And who's coming?"

He prowled around my home, looking like a caged and terrified animal. "Oldest trick in the book," he muttered, "that'll get 'em. They're pretty stupid. Hastur and Ligur. Decided to take me out, but I could tell that's what they wanted so I got the hell out of there." He looked at me. "Apparently they found out you blamed them for finding out about vampires. They decided that means I get to die because you almost got them killed. Thanks a lot."

I winced. I honestly hadn't seen this coming, and in my defence, I'd used them as scapegoats months ago. One would think that a vampire who can read minds would have figured this out beforehand, but who am I to judge? "What can I do? Wait, they can't come in here, right? My father and I haven't given them permission."

He was snapping his fingers as he paced. He nodded. "True, but that means I'm stuck in here until they burn your house down or something." He brightened. "I've got it! Okay, here's what we'll do…"

We prepared together, me doing most of the work while he directed me or boosted me if necessary. I was shaking, nervous, but he seemed confident so I let it wash over me. This would be fine. We knew what we were doing. Besides, if anyone was going to die here, it was going to be Anthony, not me. If something failed I could kick them out.

It took about five minutes to get fully prepared, and Anthony sat at the kitchen table, resting his feet on it. After making sure he didn't have any mud on his shoes, I got into place. The door was left ajar.

"Oh Craaawleeeey…"

I could hear my teachers outside, prowling around the house. I looked at Anthony, and he rolled his eyes. "Stupid old nickname," he said. "Don't even ask."

I nodded and walked to the door, looking out in the night. "Hullo?" I asked, "Are you actually looking for Crowley? Anthony Crowley? Come in, he's right here!"

As we'd planned, he let out an offended gasp. "Wait, what?"

The two pushed the door open all the way. There was a thunderstorm brewing outside that abruptly ceased when the bucket I'd set above the door fell on Ligur.

I imagine it would be like if someone dropped a vat of acid on a human: his skin began sizzling and he started screaming in agony. The water splash had hit Hastur as well, although not nearly as full-on. I looked at Anthony and even he looked revolted about what he was seeing.

"Can you put them out of their misery?" I asked.

Although it was hard to hear him over the screams, he replied, "Are you kidding? I'm not touching either of them!"

"Good point. Can I do anything?"

"Beat their weakened skulls in with one of your Bibles."

"Are you kidding? I used a Bible as a blunt-force weapon once and it got me stuck with you!"

"You know, for all that you make fun of me for liking cars so much, you are disturbingly fond of your eighty million books. But anyway, they'll die eventually." Ligur was already dead and Hastur wasn't far behind him. Hastur was crawling to me but I kicked him away. I felt horribly guilty, but also rather relived. Two less evil beings in the world, and they had been trying to hurt my boyfriend. Rejected, sirs. "And we don't even need to bury them, because…"

As if on cue, Ligur dissolved into dust and Hastur followed soon after.

"Time caught up with them?" I guessed even as I went to get a mop. The kitchen floor was now covered in holy water and vampire dust, and it was rather disgusting.

"Exactly. Glad I dodged that bullet. By the way, I'm not sure if it's wicked awesome or totally creepy that your dad has vats of holy water just lying around his house." I looked at Anthony, and he amended, "Since they saved my life, it's awesome. But what if your dad gets mad at me?"

"Well, he'd have to know you're a vampire before he decided to take you out with holy water," I reasoned as I cleaned up. "So I think for now you're safe. But you'd better be nice to me."

He rolled his eyes. "As if I'm not nice to you anyway."

"Half the time you are," I agreed.


I delivered the final blow - a simple spell, Magic Missile - against our heavily-armoured foe. With a yell of pure rage and pain, the man who had stalked me and my friends across the coast fell forward before dissolving into dust.

We had won.

"Wow," I said, completely in awe at what we had pulled off. Brian and Wensleydale were grinning at me. "Just… wow. I can't believe it's over!"

Brian waved a CD at me. "It's not! There's still two more games to go!"

I felt a jolt of excitement. "Really? Two more?"

"The second one is better than the first," Wensleydale added. "The third is pretty fun too, but it's not as long, so the second is the best." Brian nodded his agreement. "But we can't start now, it's too late."

"Yeah, I should have been leaving fifteen minutes ago," I agreed, closing my laptop and putting it away. "I can't wait until next week though! Can I get some spoilers? Who's the villain? Is it someone from this game?"

Brian shook his head. "Nope."

"He's voiced by David Warner," Wensleydale chimed in. "You know, the-"

I squealed. "The Shakespearean actor? They got a Shakespearean actor to voice the villain? Oh, oh my! I love David Warner! I love his voice, it's so, so dramatic!"

"It's really evil sounding, too," said Wensleydale. "True me, it's a perfect fit."

Now I really didn't want to go. David Warner! One of the very first movies I had ever seen was the 1968 version of A Midsummer Night's Dream starring him as Lysander, and… oh, yes. "Fine, fine, okay, next week, but don't be surprised if I show up early!" We all exchanged high-fives for our dramatic victory over evil before Wensleydale and I left.

The night was light, too light actually. I double-checked my watch to make sure that I hadn't mistaken the time, but no, it was 9:00 p.m. and I was running late, not early. Oh well, probably something going on -

There was a fire. A building was on fire.

It was my house!

I screeched my car to a halt on the street before stumbling out and running towards the house, pulling out my cell phone. I had to call the fire department, see if my father was inside, and I had to - had to - my books! MY BOOKS!

I had barely managed to dial for emergency services when something hard connected with the back of my head and I lost consciousness.


I woke up bound in the back of a truck and with a splitting headache. I tried to remember what had happened to me, but it was all blurry - I had come home from Brian's house to find that my house was aflame, and I had pulled out my cell phone to call the fire department, but then… then there had been nothing.

I tried sitting up, but it was hard to coordinate. I must have had a concussion. "Hello?" I asked, and yes, my voice was slurred. Definitely a concussion.

"Please start to beg for mercy. I love it when that happens."

The voice sounded familiar… ish. Not terribly so. It was the kind of voice that was distinctive, that I knew I'd heard before, but there was just no placing it. "No thank you. I'd rather just know what's going on, and who you are."

"Aww, I'm touched you care. We met once, you and I, while you were on a date with your rule-breaking boyfriend."

Hmm. Interesting. I hadn't gone on many dates with Anthony, and not many people had introduced themselves to me… But wait, there was one. I remembered now, sort of. "Oh, that one man, who was it, what was it… that one who had the redheaded girlfriend," I said, trying to reason it out. "I think I know. I don't remember your name though. I do remember you were here for business."

The driver sighed. "James."

His saying my name jogged my memory a bit more. "Right. The Ritz," I said, although the mere mention of food made me feel sick. I couldn't recall anything else, my head ached too much.

For his part, James sounded disappointed. "I barely hit you! Ugh, you humans are so weak."

Well, at least I wasn't giving him any villainous satisfaction. Silver linings, I suppose. And anyway, I was more focused on trying to remember what had happened beforehand. There had been… yes, gaming, and then I'd gotten home, and -

"You burnt my house down!" I yelled, feeling a second wind. "You'd better hope my father wasn't inside or else I-"

"He was," said James, and I could hear the smirk in his voice. "But don't worry, he's alive, for now. He's sitting right next to me, bound and gagged and covered in his own blood. If you annoy me too much, I'll eat him. He smells delicious."

I felt relief and horror. If James was telling the truth, my father was alive and in desperate need of medical attention. If he was lying, then I had no idea if he was alive or not. From my vantage point I couldn't see into the front of the vehicle.

But wait, why would he need my cooperation? I was his hostage.

Interesting. He needed me alive and working with him.

So now I had two goals. First, figure out if he was lying about my father or not. Second, figure out what he needed from me so that I could thwart his plans spectacularly.

I decided my first task was my father's safety, seeing as my cooperation hinged on that. To that end, I spun myself around to get my head behind the passenger seat; if James noticed, he didn't care. That's a pity, for him, because I saw a lock of red hair between the seat and the door.

Hair too dark to be my father's. Or, as the only other redhead I knew, Pepper's.

The person in the front seat was James' girlfriend.

I almost laughed, but instead I closed my eyes and forced myself to stay calm and inconspicuous. He needed me to cooperate badly enough that he'd fake a hostage situation, which meant that I had more power here than he wanted to admit, and I certainly didn't want him figuring out I knew that.

"Where are we going?" I asked, not only trying to get a better idea of his plans, but also genuinely curious. Of course, my voice likely sounded frightened or at least slurred due to my head wound, so at least I wouldn't be giving anything away.

"We're on a road trip to Italy," he sneered in reply. He supplied no other information, but he didn't need to.

James was, for whatever reason, taking me to the Volturi, likely because I'm human and associating with vampires. He most likely intended for me to implicate myself to save my father's life, because otherwise this was a word-versus-word situation and if James was wrong, then he was in violation of the rules for kidnapping me in the first place.

Of course, even if I could convince the Volturi I had no idea what was going on, they'd likely eat me anyway, but at least they'd kill James first. Sadly, that was about the best I could hope for.

Unless I could escape between now and then…

That was likely a stupid idea. Even if I managed to escape a moving vehicle with a concussion, there were two vampires in the front seat who could easily catch me again. No, sadly, I had two options: wait until someone rescued me, or be able to bluff my way out of the situation.

But for now, there were a few things I knew. James had been hired by the Volturi to fetch me, and he was also very cocky. This meant that as long as I kept the topic about him and his superiority, he would likely tell me everything I wanted to know. "So why you?" I asked. "Why did the Volturi hire you?"

He chuckled, and his voice sounded very excited. "My powers are those of the hunt. Once I have a target, I can and will find them wherever they hide, no matter what they do. Of course I prefer to eat them at the end, but it makes me an excellent bounty hunter."

Hmm, interesting powers. That really did clinch it, though, that escape wasn't an option: even if I managed to flee, he could find me again. I had to admit too that with such a specific power set, it really made bounty hunting or assassinations the only jobs he would be good at. I was just lucky I wasn't worth much dead. "I see that," I replied, trying to boost his ego a bit. "I had no idea I was the business you were after, and yet here I am. So, why do the Volturi want me? What's their endgame?"

He was bouncing in his seat now. "Extermination."

Interesting. Very interesting. The level of excitement that he had about it made me think that maybe "extermination" had been their plan for awhile, and I was just their lucky break. That made it even less likely I was going to survive whatever came up.

There was a loud squealing noise and the car stopped. I rolled and slammed my head into the back of the passenger seat, and I lost consciousness.

When I woke up again, the first thing I did was vomit.

"That's what happens when you ignore me," said James, who sounded petulant. "We're here."

Ah, crap. I logically knew that escape wasn't really an option, but I had at least intended on being awake to take advantage of any opportunities. No such luck.

He got out of the truck and came around the back, lifting me out and covering my head with a cloth bag. I tried my best to listen to everything going on, just in case, but frankly, I was terrified. On the ride down, I had calmly accepted that I wouldn't mind dying if James was taken out with me, but that was cold comfort now.

As if he wasn't already a huge arse, he made me walk the through what I could only tell was a cold and dark area with plenty of twists. Even if I escaped now I couldn't make it out. I was well and truly in trouble.

The hood was taken off me and I got a good look at the Volturi's Council Chamber. It was large and ornate, but interestingly enough it only had 5 chairs. I use the term chairs but it could just as easily be thrones, and they were all intricately carved to represent the person sitting on them.

War was yet another redhead, yet far foxier than the ones I'd met. She looked bored and she reminded me of a tiger - content for now, but plenty dangerous. She was curled up on her throne, licking blood off her fingers. Unsanitary. Her throne looked completely uncomfortable, with images of swords hewn into smooth red marble. If I remembered right - or, frankly, if Anthony had been right - her powers were to make someone feel a furious, blind rage, reducing them to being a feral dog.

Next to her was an emaciated man dressed in all black, whom I could assume was Famine by process of elimination. His legs were crossed and he was regarding me curiously. His black-marble throne was mostly plain, with weighing scales etched into the head. If Anthony had been correct, he had the power to cause me to waste away to nothing.

On his other side was a little boy who was playing with a white yo-yo. Everything about him was white - his clothes, his hair, his eyes, his skin - and he blended in well with his white marble throne. If I had to imagine a Pollution he is not what that would have been, but that's hardly his fault. It was hard to focus on anything about him, so my eyes slid to the next one.

Next to him was an old, old man wearing a green lab coat, sitting on a throne made of marble (of course) in the sickliest looking green I'd ever seen. He himself looked to be terminally ill - I could hear him wheezing - and I felt an urge to get nowhere near him ever. I also didn't want to anger him, considering he could make me ill.

The Fifth and final vampire was sitting upon a pale-coloured marble throne, although he was wearing black as well - a huge black cowled cloak. Looking at him made me feel absolutely and utterly terrified, so I couldn't look at him either. As such it was almost a relief when one of the others was the first to speak.

"Welcome back, James," said Famine, his voice reedy and not at all intimidating. "What did you discover?"

"This is the Britain coven's pet human," James began, confident as he poked my back to move me forward. "She-"

This was my chance. None of these people could read minds, so it was all up to my acting ability. Thankfully, the fact that I was terrified was not an act. "I'm whose what?" I asked, allowing my fear into my voice, "I don't know what's going on! I was coming home from school and this man attacked me! Then he threatened my family if I didn't listen to him!"

James looked a cross between scared and royally pissed off. "Don't listen to her! She met one of the coven at school-"

"A witch at school?" I interrupted, "Who is it? I thought the rumours about Mrs Nutter were just talk!"

"Vampires, you stupid - quit playing dumb!"

Checkmate, my dear James. "Vampires? Why would vampires go to high school?"

He was flummoxed. Frankly, I don't blame him.

War started giggling, her feet kicking in amusement. "Oh, oh! Did you overstep yourself? I hope so. I hate you."

Victoria was behind me, although I didn't know it until she spoke up. "No, the girl is lying. She knows exactly what's going on."

My nerves were already shot, and I honestly hadn't known she was there, so it wasn't too hard of a stretch for me to jump and continue playing the terrified prey. "Ah! Who are you! Where did you come from!" I faced the Volturi and put on my best pleading expression. "This has to be a dream! Please just let me go home! I just want to wake up from this nightmare!"

Pestilence held up his arm, bidding everyone to wait for him to speak. His voice was barely intelligible. "Proof?"

The spotlight was on James now, and he clearly did not want it there. Gone was the cocky slag who'd dragged me here. He stammered out a negative. "Nothing physical, I mean, but I'm telling you, they know her! I saw her talking to four of them!" Oh, creepy. James walloped Anthony in the competition of which one was the better stalker.

Famine shook his head solemnly. "We told you to be thorough. We can't wage war over incidentals. We need to have the proof on our side."

"I can go back! I can find something - a gift, or-"

"You burnt my house down!" I countered.

All five of the "Horsemen" sat up a little straighter at that.

"You what?" demanded Pestilence. "Are you mad?"

"I needed to make sure she didn't go inside, where I couldn't get her," James protested. To my shock, Victoria fled and no one made a move to stop her. I couldn't blame her at all, considering she'd only done what I was hoping I could do. "And I-"

YOUR ORDERS WERE SIMPLE.

I find it almost impossible to describe Death's voice. It was booming, and yet not loud. It pierced through everything, almost as if I wasn't hearing it with my ears. There was no arguing with that voice.

YOU WERE TO GATHER EVIDENCE OF THE BRITAIN COVEN'S VIOLATION OF THE ANCIENT LAWS. INSTEAD, YOU COMMITTED CRIMES ON ANOTHER COVEN'S TERRITORY AND KIDNAPPED A HUMAN GIRL WITHOUT ANY PROOF OF HER INVOLVEMENT.

"There was no proof - no gifts, nothing but physical involvement!" James whispered, voice weak. I am never going to complain about how terrible of a boyfriend Anthony is again, I thought to myself. If he'd given me more than flowers, I would be dead. "Please, you have to believe me, she knows, they violated the rules…"

"Can I kill him?" asked War brightly, orange eyes shining. Pollution had gone back to playing with his yo-yo.

Death nodded once, and War leapt up from her throne, reaching behind it and pulling out a massive broadsword. "Yay!"

James crouched down, letting go of me, and I quickly moved away from him. He valiantly defended himself, but the fight was over very quickly in War's favour. I won't disturb you with the details, but his death made Hastur and Ligur's look positively clean.

Now there was just me.

WHAT A WASTE OF TIME AND ENERGY, said Death, standing up. A huge scythe materialised in his hand - his skeletal hand - and he started walking towards me.

I'm not ashamed to admit I began screaming.