Date written: Fri 9 Oct 2009

Author: Starway Man

E-mail: theop at hotkey dot net dot au

Disclaimer: The Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel characters are the property of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, Sandollar, Kuzui, Fox, WB and UPN; I don't own 'em, and I never will. I also do not own any other characters from any television shows, movies, comics, videogames or literature that I might use. This work is meant merely for enjoyment, and no profit is being made off of it. Some of the text is from various TV episodes or movies or comics or videogames or literature, and so does not belong to me of course.

Rating: Overall R, with mostly PG-13 parts.

Symbols: " " denotes speech, ( italics ) specifies thoughts, and # # indicates phone voice.

Main characters: Xander, ensemble

Warnings: There is some violence, bad language, character death and mention of sexual situations in these stories.

Author Notes: A couple of years ago Night Hunter MGS (a.k.a. Matt) wrote an awesome series of stories called "31 Days of Xanderween" (http://www .fanfiction .net/s/3813208/1/31_Days_of_Xanderween), where he published one Halloween fic for each day of October. I was inspired enough to want to do my own version of the concept, and he has graciously allowed me to use his idea for this series of fanfic stories.

Author Notes 2: I must confess, I was a big fan of this TV show back in the day. Recently, I re-read part of the Journeyverse saga originally created by Tenhawk, and somehow I got inspired with this particular idea. Go figure, huh? Anyway, a big thank-you as always to everyone who is, and has been, sending feedback and reviews!

Acknowledgments: My thanks of course to Matt for allowing me to dabble with his original idea this way. Also, my deepest gratitude to all my beta readers – Francis Eugene, Greywizard, American Soldier and Nodakskip – for all their help in getting these stories finished on time!

Classification: Alternate Universe, Angst, Crossover, Romance, YAHF

Summary: Thirty-one versions of Halloween, Xander-style. Fic-a-day series.

Title:31 Days of Xanderween Part Deux

***

Story 9: Cyborg

17619 White Oak Drive, Sunnydale, California

October 29th, 1997

Xander Harris was, all things considered, a fairly normal 17-year-old boy. He lived at home with his parents, he had friends at high school, he read comic books and he also watched TV. All sorts of shows, actually: Babylon 5, Star Trek and even reruns of the old 1970's classic, The Six Million Dollar Man.

As the episode started, Xander geekily spoke the words of the opening sequence along with the narrator: "Steve Austin, astronaut. A man barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster..."

One of the reasons Xander was a big fan of the TV show was because it showed a normal man who was suddenly thrust into a world where he was able to his new superpowers to survive and even thrive amongst spies, aliens, and even the occasional killer space probe. Even though he hated to admit it, the male teenager couldn't help being slightly jealous of his friend Buffy the vampire Slayer for her superhero powers: Xander often wished that he could be the one who could protect HER that way, whenever the Hellmouth monsters came crawling out of their lairs.

In time, Alexander Harris would know never to jinx himself by making a wish like that. But that time had not come yet.

***

Somewhere on the streets of Sunnydale, California

October 31st, 1997

Colonel Steve Austin shook his head slightly, as he looked around in confusion and disorientation. ( Where the heck am I? )

The bionic man suddenly felt something tied around his forehead, and yanked it off. Steve stared at the headband containing Native American markings in surprise, ( I remember this! But that was ages ago, when I was on that reservation looking for our missing scientists... )

Indeed, as bad luck would have it Xander had come up with the idea for his Halloween costume after watching that particular episode on the idiot box two nights ago. Austin's train of thought was quickly derailed, though, when he finally noticed what was happening all around him. He was on a suburban street somewhere – where exactly, he didn't know – but he doubted that he was in Washington any longer. For one thing, the streets of D.C. didn't have child-sized monsters chasing after screaming kids and adults like this.

Well, not that often anyway...

"Xander! Xander!" the cyborg turned around to see a young, redheaded teenage girl racing towards him. "Are you okay?"

"Uh, miss, I think you've got me mistaken for someone else-" Steve abruptly cut himself off, as he used his bionic eye's infrared capability to study the person before him more carefully. But to his surprise, there was nothing there as far as his heat vision could detect. "Who are you? WHAT are you?"

"What? Xander, it's me Willow!" Miss Rosenberg stated in annoyance, just as Steve poked a finger straight through her noncorporeal form. Putting on a brave face she added, "Yeah, see, I turned into a ghost just now, but that's not important. Listen-"

"A ghost?" Austin interrupted uncertainly. He had seen a lot of strange things over the years, and so wasn't willing to dismiss Willow's words straight out of hand. "And who's Xander? My name's Steve Austin."

Willow took in the 1970's clothes and the headband the man was holding in his hand, before he stuffed it into his pocket. "Oh no, Xander...you, you turned into your costume as well? You really ARE the Six Million Dollar Man now?!"

Steve didn't get that. "How did you know how much it cost the government to..." he quickly cut himself off, all that stuff was still classified after all.

Willow would have answered his question, but just then a monster appeared across the street. Steve saw it and said, "Ghost or not I suggest you find some cover, right now!"

***

1630 Revello Drive, Sunnydale, California

A short while later

It had been a pretty wild ride so far, what with picking up the 18th century noblewoman which Buffy Summers had turned into – and witnessing things that Steve wouldn't have believed possible, unless he'd seen them himself. He said to Willow, "So lemme get this straight; this is the year 1997, and I don't actually exist? Not to mention, everyone I know – Jaime, Michael, Rudy, Oscar, and the people at the OSI – they're all just something out of a TV show as well?"

"Uh, yeah," Willow said apologetically, with a quick glance at Lady Buffy; who was wandering throughout the room and gaping at photos and such. "Look, I-I know this must be somewhat upsetting-"

"Almost getting myself killed in that Northrop HL-10 all those years ago, that was upsetting," Steve interrupted her, painfully recalling the accident which had made him into the world's first bionic man. "But this, this is way beyond that!"

Willow wasn't sure what to say, but then a loud female scream was heard from outside the door. Concerned, Austin went to look, and immediately his eyes widened. Without a word, the colonel raced out the door despite Willow's pleas for him to come back.

"Where did he go? Surely he'll not desert us?" Lady Buffy asked fearfully, her 18th century mentality was such that the noblewoman was dependent on the men-folk to protect and defend her.

Willow would have locked the door, but her hands lacked any substance to do so. "He'll be back," the redhead said to her companion. "Trust me, he'll be back."

The noblewoman did not look convinced. But outside, Steve Austin was running towards a screaming brunette girl dressed in a leopard-like cat outfit, with what looked like a Sasquatch chasing after her. Cordelia Chase looked back at the thing right on her tail, and then bumped straight into Steve.

"Xander! Help me!" the cheerleader pleaded, not knowing that her classmate was possessed by his Halloween costume.

"Get inside the house," Austin commanded her, pointing and shoving her in the right direction. As Cordelia took off, the Sasquatch – or Bigfoot, call it what you will – started slowing down as it came towards Steve. As it came to a halt, Austin said, "You're a long way from your cave, buddy boy. What are you doing here?"

The Sasquatch – actually, a former alien construct with bionics not unlike those of Austin himself – came to a complete halt. Staring at Steve in puzzlement, the creature squatted down and emitted a loud, rumbling noise.

"Hello again, old friend," the bionic man took a risk and placed a hand on the Bigfoot's shoulder, hoping with all his might that the creature would remember him. "Are you in pain? I thought you were fully healed now, after our last meeting in the mountains..."

The Sasquatch didn't know what was going on. Ever since it had awakened in this strange place, the constant screaming and bad smells and artificial lighting had gotten on its nerves. But now it had met a human who wasn't afraid of it, and vaguely smelled like one of its own kind. It emitted a low growl which, unfortunately, Steve couldn't understand.

"I'm sorry, pal. I don't know what that means, I don't have one of those alien translator devices with me right now," Steve said apologetically. "Look, if you can understand me – I suggest you go find somewhere to stay under cover, at least for now. I'm not sure how much I'm willing to believe of what I've been told tonight, but if it's all true? Well, you and I don't really exist," the former astronaut shrugged. "This is all just a...a magic spell, apparently."

The Bigfoot briefly placed a hand on Steve's arm in confusion, since the former android could sense that the human cyborg didn't intend any harm towards it even if there was little else that made sense. Then sharing a long look with the bionic man, it turned around and lumbered off into the night.

"Godspeed, old friend," Steve murmured, before going back into 1630 Revello Drive.

***

A warehouse in the industrial district, Sunnydale, California

A while later

After Lady Buffy had run away from the house, an unfortunate series of events had culminated in the white hats getting trapped in one of the bad parts of town. Steve was throwing the little child-sized monsters around left and right, but hamstrung by Willow's orders not to kill or seriously injure any of the possessed kids around him, he simply wasn't making any headway into winning his current battle.

The mini-demon army was commanded by the vampire named Spike, a.k.a. William the Bloody, who looked annoyed rather than concerned at Steve's actions. "Will one of you idiots just take care of that bloody ponce already?" he shouted at his minions for the night.

Nearby, Cordelia was being held securely even though she was gamely attempting to get free. The vampire with a soul named Angel, who was coincidentally Spike's grandsire, also struggled to get loose of the two demons holding him captive. "Buffy!" he shouted.

The black-haired noblewoman was weeping and trembling helplessly, trying to back away from the flaxen-haired demon heading straight towards her. "Please..."

"Look at you! Shaking. Terrified. Alone. Lost little lamb," Spike jeered, as Buffy backed up against a crate and couldn't back off any further. William slapped her across the face with the back of his hand. "I love it!"

"Didn't anyone ever teach you how to treat a lady properly?" Spike heard Steve Austin's voice behind him, before the man gripped the vampire with his bulldozer-strength right arm and hurled him head-first into the wall at 50 mph, scrambling Spike's brains. "Well, allow me then..."

"That guy, you can tear his head off!" the impotent Willow ghost called out to Steve, from the middle of the room.

But just then, something unexpected happened. At Ethan's costume shop, the focus of the mage's spell – the bust of the statue Janus – was destroyed, and the chaos magicks were abruptly terminated. Willow ceased to be a ghost, vanishing out of the warehouse and waking up in her body not far away. Buffy ceased to be a noblewoman, throwing away the black wig in disgust as Spike decided to run for it. The demons turned back into upset and frightened children...

But Xander Harris collapsed screaming onto the floor. His right arm, both his legs and left eye beginning to collapse inwards and bleed profusely, as the bionics within them disappeared and the absent human tissue was unable to be regenerated by his normal, pitifully mortal body...which in turn was due to how magic tended to go all 'wonky' around him.

***

Sunnydale General Hospital, Sunnydale, California

Later that night

The physician on duty looked up in surprise as Angel burst in, carrying Xander in his arms. ( What the-? )

Buffy, Willow and Cordelia were right behind them as the ensouled vampire spied a gurney and placed the bleeding male teenager within it. The medical intern thought that the patient looked to be in terrible shape, even from a distance like this.

"We need some help here!" Angel called out authoritatively, just as Willow called out, "Somebody, please help!"

The intern came over and demanded to know, "What happened?"

"Gang attack, he got hurt by some guys who were high on PCP," Buffy said the first thing that came into her head, as she certainly couldn't tell anyone around here the truth.

The intern recoiled at once. "Dr. Wilkinson!" he called out as a nurse came over to assist, and her eyes went wide as well.

The female doctor came over at once as the intern tried to do whatever he could. "Good God! Get him into Trauma 1, starting binding the wounds. Also do a CBC, Chem 7, type and screen," she commanded.

"Yes, doctor," the intern said as the gurney began to be wheeled away.

"What does that mean?" Buffy looked very upset, as she had no idea what the techno-babble meant.

"Are any of you related to the patient? Family of some sort?" Dr. Wilkinson asked as they headed towards the emergency room doors.

"No," Cordelia said with a shrug, ignoring the angry looks from Buffy and Willow.

"Then I'm sorry, but I can't tell you anything right now," Dr. Wilkinson said to the group, as the intern and the nurse took Xander into the ER.

"No, stop! You can't go beyond this point, hospital rules," the doctor suddenly ordered the girls, who were trying to follow the gurney.

"But it's Xander!" Buffy almost yelled. She would have done something stupid and barged past the doctor anyway, the M.D. and the huge, hulking orderlies could have done little against someone with Slayer strength – but luckily, Angel was there to grab her by the shoulder and prevent Miss Summers from needlessly making a scene that way.

"I'm sorry, but like I said you can't go any further; the public isn't allowed beyond this point. I, I promise we'll do everything we can to help your friend," Dr. Wilkinson said, before she backed in and the doors slammed shut in the Scooby Gang's faces.

Willow wiped her tear-streaked eyes. "How could this happen? All the rest of us are fine! I'm fine. Buffy, are you fine?!"

"Yeah, I'm 100 percent," Buffy nodded, still looking tempted to barge into the ER and start demanding answers which the doctors didn't have yet.

"I don't get it either," Cordelia frowned. "I mean, what's so special about that big loser that his body started self-destructing like that?" She saw the glares from Buffy and Willow and said, "What? I'm just saying!"

"You need to learn the meaning of the word 'tact'," Angel said reproachfully, which instantly made Cordelia stiffen at the insult. "From what I've heard, Xander saved your life tonight from that Bigfoot creature which was chasing you. So it wouldn't kill you not to call the guy names at this particular point in time."

"Fine! Well, I know when I'm not wanted," the Chase girl glared at the vampire, mentally crossing him off of her 'salty goodness' list. She then marched off to the public phone booths to call her family chauffeur, for a quick ride home.

"Good riddance," Willow muttered under her breath. Then she said more loudly, "I, I better call Xander's parents, right? Tell them, well – n-not what happened, but just get them here. And, and Giles too, don't you think?"

"Good idea, Will." Buffy suddenly looked exhausted, and pretty much melted into Angel's arms. "I-if this is mystical in nature, he'd be the one to go to and all."

Willow left to find a free public phone as Buffy and Angel made their way over to some nearby chairs, and settled in to wait for some news from the hospital staff.

***

Elsewhere in the hospital

November 1st, 1997

Not long after the midnight hour, Xander's parents Anthony and Jessica Harris had finally made their way here to Sunnydale General. Tony Harris certainly didn't look pleased to be here, that was for sure. And what exactly that was due to wasn't hard to guess, right now.

"So bottom line this for me, doc. What's wrong with the kid?" Tony demanded.

The man known as Dr. Backer stared at Dr. Wilkinson for a moment, finding it hard to believe that this guy was being so abrasive instead of being worried about his son. "I'm terribly sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Harris," he said. "But I'm afraid that your son's injuries are very severe, and-and since we don't actually know what's happened-"

"I asked you a simple question," Tony interrupted, looking meaner and brutish than ever. "What's wrong with him?"

"His left eye is completely missing, and his right arm is no longer attached to the shoulder. His legs look as if they've been crushed, and there are also faint signs of radioactivity there for some reason we can't possibly understand," Dr. Wilkinson spoke up. "A number of ribs were broken, a heart valve was damaged, and his skull was fractured. We operated as soon as possible, but unfortunately there was relatively little we could do. So the bottom line is, your son is now a paraplegic. He'll need a lot of special care and therapy, but hopefully one day he'll be able to walk again with the use of crutches-"

"WHAT?" Anthony Harris roared.

His wife Jessica looked scared. "What are we supposed to do? We don't have medical insurance, so how are we gonna pay for an extended stay in hospital?"

"Well, there are a number of disaster relief funds you could possibly apply for," Dr. Backer replied uncertainly.

"We already tried that when my brother Rory had to stay in hospital for a while," Tony glowered. "This is gonna bankrupt us, isn't it?"

( Oh, for God's sake! Their son could be dying in the ICU right now, and all these two are worried about is money? ) Dr. Wilkinson thought to herself in contempt. But the medical professional simply said, "Look, Mr. Harris, I know this has been a very traumatic experience for you and your wife, but we need to focus on the big picture here. Namely, Alexander's medical needs-"

"Do whatever is necessary for him," Tony said abruptly, surprising the hell out of everyone in the room. "I just need to talk to my wife for a minute in private though, is that okay?"

"Of course," Dr. Backer replied, sharing another glance with Dr. Wilkinson as the two parents left the room.

Both doctors had no idea that this would be the last time they would ever see Anthony and Jessica Harris, ever again.

***

Private room, second floor of the Sunnydale General Hospital

November 3rd, 1997

Xander Harris lay in the hospital bed, his one functional eye staring blankly at nothing. He felt resigned more than anything else at the news from a social services worker that his parents had packed their stuff and disappeared out of Sunnydale, evidently in order not to have to deal with him and his situation.

But apart from resignation, he also felt – old. Because he could remember Steve Austin's life as clearly as if he'd lived it all himself.

Xander could remember what it was like growing up in Ojai during the 1940's and 50's, and enlisting in the army as a chopper pilot during the Vietnam War. He could remember transferring to the Air Force, and then to NASA, and meeting Dr. Rudy Wells. He remembered the accident, and trying to commit suicide afterwards. He remembered the months of therapy, and meeting Oscar Goldman, and then the operation costing six million dollars. Most importantly, he remembered the two people which had meant the most to Steve Austin in the entire world...

Jaime Sommers-Austin, his wife as of three years ago, and his son Michael, born in the early 1960's and following in his father's footsteps – all the way to his own accident and his own bionic implants.

Xander sighed, even though it hurt. He hadn't needed the doctors to tell him what was wrong: the Steve Austin memories were very clear on what this sort of pain was all about, and he had already guessed what had happened to him. After the spell-induced bionics had disappeared into oblivion they'd left open, gaping holes where his body parts used to be.

Why this had happened, he didn't know. But Xander was in bad shape, and there was nothing Giles could do for him.

The Watcher had been here a while ago, along with a broken and crying Willow, and explained the situation as gently as he could. Buffy and Angel had briefly visited as well, but they hadn't stayed long. The Slayer obviously had a case of terminal guilt about what had happened to him, even though she shouldn't have, and the vampire couldn't really think of anything to say that wouldn't sound hollow and insincere.

"My God, but you still look like a complete mess!"

( Oh, wonderful. The perfect way to end the perfect day. ) Xander turned his head around and said slowly, "Cor-de-li-a."

Queen C looked at him and then said to herself, "Right, tact, I made a mental note on how I'm supposed to practice that more often. Well, anyway, I won't ask how you're doing, because it's obvious you're doing absolutely lousy, like to the nth degree. I just came over to talk to you, before my father comes in to visit."

( Your father? ) Harris thought to himself in confusion, his brain wasn't working very well thanks to all the pain meds he was currently on.

Cordelia was easily able to guess his train of thought, though. "Yeah, I told my dad how you saved my life on Friday night, and once he heard that your parents had split town – hell, all of Sunnydale knows that by now, it was the biggest gossip at school today – Daddy agreed to pay for all your medical expenses from now on. Whatever he can do for you for saving my life from that Bigfoot monster, he will."

( Ol' wide eyes wasn't a monster, damn it, he was my friend! ) Xander thought angrily to himself, unable to suppress the Steve Austin memories on the subject. But all he could manage to say was, "Fri-iend..."

"Well, let's not get all mushy about it. But yeah, I guess you can call me that now if you want to," Cordelia misunderstood and briefly looked uncomfortable. "And just so you know, I heard the Mayor is planning to make a speech concerning you, something to do with an urban safety program to combat the 'gang problem' we have in this town.

"Yeah, right," the young woman rolled her eyes cynically. "So be prepared to find yourself a celebrity for a while, 'til something else gets its fifteen minutes in America."

Miss Chase looked as if she was struggling to find the right words for a moment. "I just...look – believe it or not, I'm sorry this happened to you, dweeb. I know we fight like all the time, and just the other day I wished that you really would get run over by a bus like this; but you deserved better than that. I really do hope that despite the odds, you get better soon."

With nothing left to say, Queen C simply turned around and left the room. Xander watched her depart, the exasperation and annoyance factor a welcome, if fleeting, feeling of normality in his life.

***

Sunnydale High School, Sunnydale, California

December 3rd, 1997

The weeks had passed, and the Hellmouth had continued to throw all sorts of hijinks the depleted Scooby Gang's way. Ethan Rayne had come and gone out of their lives again, and freely admitted that there was nothing he could do to help Xander before the demon Eyghon had shown up. Right now, though, Buffy and Willow were discussing the latest threat to have crossed their path; the psychotic killer robot calling itself Ted Buchanan.

"I am so glad that THING has finally been disassembled," Buffy said to her gal pal as they headed towards the library. The Chosen One had only just begun to get used to the fact that Xander wasn't attending school with them anymore, and so didn't automatically seek him out to include him in the conversation. "And between planning to marry my mom and sneaking into my room that way, I'd say Robbie the Robot deserved everything he got last night!"

"Um, Buffy?" Willow said tentatively, "I gotta tell you, the real Ted must've been a genius. Because there were design features in that robot he created which pre-date anything in the mainstream, at least during the 1950's..."

"Willow? Please tell me that you didn't keep that psycho machine's robo-parts to play around with?" Miss Summers looked scandalized.

"Uh, some of them. Because I..." Willow paused and then nerved herself to continue. "Look, I-I've had a while to think about it, and I've come to the conclusion that we've been going about the Xander situation all wrong. If magic can't fix what's happened to him, then maybe good old physics and engineering can."

"Huh?" Buffy didn't get it. "What are you..." Then the penny dropped. "Oh, come on, you can't be serious! Willow, this is real life, not TV or the movies!"

"I've been doing a lot of reading ever since last night," Miss Rosenberg insisted. "And I'm sure that Ted's hardware can be modified to fill in for Xander's missing pieces, that's not the problem..."

"Then what is?" Buffy asked, even though she still couldn't believe they were actually having this conversation.

"I'm not a doctor," Willow confessed rather awkwardly. "I mean yeah, I know the theory. But there's more to being a surgeon than just book knowledge, the same way there is to being a computer hacker after simply reading that stupid Internet for Dummies book. The sad fact is, I can't do it all by myself – we need to recruit someone else with the right skills to operate on Xander, to make sure Ted's machine parts are properly integrated within his body – especially the nervous and circulatory systems."

"Uh-huh," Buffy replied, humouring her. "And I'm sure all the doctors at the hospital are immediately gonna volunteer for something like that, and run the risk of getting their asses sued off in court if something goes wrong..." She sighed at Willow's hurt expression.

"Well, it's the truth! Okay, fine. Just for the sake of argument, Willow, have you got someone in mind for the job?" the Slayer demanded.

"Um, yeah," the redhead admitted uneasily. "But I don't think you're gonna like who..."

***

Sunnydale General Hospital, Sunnydale, California

December 4th, 1997

"What the hell is HE doing here?" Cordelia yelled from Xander's bedside, glaring at the young man who had come in with Willow and Buffy.

Pointing at the boy named Chris Epps, Cordy added, "This ASSHOLE was part of that sick and demented plan to kidnap me, and turn me into the Bride of Frankenstein three months ago!"

"I, I'm sorry about that – but, y'know, in my defence I couldn't go through with it in the end, and I actually helped Buffy here stop it," Chris said timidly, figuring he was never going to live down what had happened with his zombie brother Daryl back then.

"So what do you want for that, a medal?" Cordelia sneered at him. Then she returned her attention to the hacker and the Slayer, "All right, you two, spill. Just what was going through your tiny little minds, bringing that creep anywhere near me?"

"Well, we didn't bring Chris here to talk to you, we wanted to talk to Xander. What are you doing here, anyway?" Willow demanded.

"Oh, Cordy visits me every so often. Apparently there's no one else at school who can keep up with her, so she needs to trade insults with me in order to maintain her edge," Xander said to her. He could speak normally again now, at least.

In response to Willow's stare Harris added, "Don't look at me like that, Will; it's not like I could prevent it, especially with her dad paying my bills and all. And oddly enough, I appreciate spending time with someone who doesn't keep blaming themselves for something that wasn't even their fault."

( Ouch. ) Both Buffy and Willow flinched at that one, but they simply couldn't help their feelings, despite how many times Xander had asked them not to indulge in their constant guilt trip.

"Xander..." Buffy started to say, even though she had no idea what to add after that.

"Maybe we can just get on with why I'm here? I do happen to have other commitments, you know," Chris spoke up.

"Good idea," Willow said, easily ignoring Cordelia's dirty look. "Okay, Xander, I've talked it over with Chris, and we've come up with an idea..." She then proceeded to explain it in full.

"You CAN'T be serious!!" Cordelia exploded once Willow had finished talking.

"Why not?" Miss Rosenberg demanded. "It'll work, I know it will..."

"Oh please, you actually wanna let this loser operate on Xander, and just make things even worse? Willow, have you finally burned out all of your few remaining brain cells?" Miss Chase wanted to know. "Not to mention the fact that the hospital staff will never let you do it!"

"Yeah, well, I guess that's where someone like you comes in. You're gonna have to convince your dad to move Xander to somewhere more private, somewhere where we can carry out the plan," Buffy informed her, Willow and Chris had made a true believer out of her lately.

"Fat chance," Cordelia replied rudely. "God, Buffy, I can't believe that you of all people are going along with this, this, this insanity! Has all that hair dye finally leached into your brain or what?!"

Buffy just glared venomously at the beauty queen, hating to be reminded that she was not a natural blonde. "You know something? I'm suddenly deciding this is absolutely none of your business, so why don't you just take a hike before I show you what Slayer strength is really capable of?"

"Guys?" Xander, who had been silent up until now, finally spoke up. "We have a visitor."

The teenagers all whirled around, and everyone but Chris relaxed when they saw Angel's dark and imposing form. "Who's this?" he asked nervously.

"My boyfriend," Buffy said, as she immediately went to give him a big hug and kiss. "Angel, what are you doing here?"

"I've been lurking around the hospital a lot ever since Halloween, I know how much you worry about Xander's safety; since it's a public building and all," Angel confessed, glancing at the male teen.

"I'm touched. Apart from that thing of, y'know, having my very own vampire stalker, of course," Xander said sarcastically.

"He's a VAMPIRE?!" Chris yelped, instantly moving back.

"You can relax, I don't bite," Angel said brusquely to him. "Look, I couldn't help overhearing what you guys were talking about just now..."

"And?" Buffy prompted him.

Oddly, Angel aimed his reply at the patient instead of his soul mate. "Xander, if you do decide to do this – try to replace your missing body parts with mechanical substitutes – then there's no way Willow and this guy will ever be able to pull it off at any conventional hospital. There are too many rules and procedures, too much paperwork that couldn't be filled in properly; besides, they're both underage and lack any formal qualifications. Those two can't just try to sneak in at night and do it in secret either; these days, there are security cameras monitoring everything everywhere, it'd never work."

"So what do you suggest?" Xander held the undead guy's dark eyes with his one brown one.

"I've heard about someone on the demon grapevine," Angel confessed. "His name's Dr. Gregson, he has his own place in Los Angeles. Fully equipped; I'd say he'd be your best bet for finding a medical facility willing to look the other way during the operation, if the price is right."

"Angel? What is it you aren't telling us?" Buffy asked, sensing how her boyfriend was attempting to conceal something.

( Damn. She knows me too well by now, ) the ensouled vampire thought with a mental sigh. Then he said, "Gregson is a Slod demon, according to my information – so he's not exactly bound by the Hippocratic Oath, if you know what I mean."

"Great! More demon stuff," Cordelia exclaimed, looking annoyed. "God, Angel, I am SO glad that I never went out on a date with you. You'd have offered me blood instead of wine during the dessert, or something equally as gross!"

"Are you still here?" Buffy threw her an angry look.

"Okay, guys, time out," Xander said tiredly. "Everyone except Willow, could you please wait outside for a while? I need to talk to her – alone."

Buffy and Cordelia didn't look happy at being excluded from proceedings like this, but they nonetheless followed Angel and Chris outside. It was a psychological thing – both teenagers had an alpha female mentality, and the reluctance with which they left was evident with every step that they took and every backwards glance at the patient. The guys were different, although no less concerned, but at least they knew enough to give the two women lots of space for now.

Once the door had shut, Xander fixed his eye on Willow. "So, Will. You really think that you can fix me?"

"Well, yeah. I mean it should work in theory and I can't think of any reason why it wouldn't work or else I wouldn't have come to you with this, I-I-I know it sounds like a long shot but I'm pretty sure I can pull it off if everything goes to plan-"

"Willow! Breathe," Harris cut off the babbling redhead with an unwilling smile. "Come over here a minute, and look at me." She did so, yet wouldn't make eye contact with the man. "I said look at me, Willow. Right in the eye, or I call everyone back in here and tell them the whole crazy plan is not gonna happen."

Reluctantly, Miss Rosenberg obeyed orders, even though every time she saw his disfigured face and body it made her want to cry. "Xander..."

"Willow, you have to convince me that you can do this without the damn waterworks," Xander said simply. "Because I can remember what Steve Austin went through after he had that kind of surgery, and there is no way in hell I'm gonna put myself through something like that without knowing beforehand that there's a good chance of success. I wouldn't survive it, I'd go completely nuts afterwards and kill myself somehow."

He saw her expression and went on, "This isn't a game, proving that you're way ahead of the rest of the class at school or something. It's not about feeling sorry for what happened to me either, if I thought it was then we wouldn't be having this conversation. This is about being a grown-up, Will, and making grown-up decisions.

"It's my life we're talking about: so that means being willing to accept the consequences if something goes wrong. And don't you dare try to tell me that you can guarantee how everything's gonna be hunky-dory, somehow. So let's hear it, Willow. Convince me that you know what you're doing, and that this is the right thing to do."

Somewhat hesitantly, the young woman began to speak. She noticed that Xander never interrupted, he just listened carefully and asked questions whenever she wanted to know if there was anything he didn't understand. Willow was surprised at the extent of Xander's knowledge thanks to the Halloween possession, and so she began to lecture him on the finer technical points, treating Harris as an equal for once instead of a hopeless romantic crush.

Finally, Buffy's impatience was too much for her to withstand any longer. She stuck her head inside the room and said, "Xander, is this gonna take much longer?"

The paraplegic young man just glanced at her before looking back at Willow. Then he said, "No, Buff, I don't think so. I've made up my mind; we're doing this."

***

Sunnydale High School, Sunnydale, California

September 8th, 1998

It was a sight none of the students had ever expected to see again: Xander Harris walking amongst them on his own two legs once more.

The surgery had gone well. Willow and Chris Epps had made a good team and Dr. Gregson had been fascinated to watch them perform the procedure, even assisting as the nurse. There had been a number of details to take care of, namely making sure that no one ever saw Xander arrive and later depart the premises; since the human-looking demon doctor didn't need the state medical board to investigate and then remove his license for illegal surgery by a pair of minors.

But there had been no problems from the operation, and now with the months of agonizing therapy behind him the young man was coming to visit Giles at the library.

"Xander? Good Lord, I-I-I wasn't expecting this," Rupert stammered. "Sit down, for heaven's sake, you must be-"

"I'm fine," Xander was determined to nip this in the bud right now. "And I'll say this only once, Giles. Don't try to treat me like an invalid, because these days I could kick your ass from here into next week. Just treat me like you did before, G-man, and we'll get along okay."

"Don't call me-" Giles automatically began to say, before taking off his glasses and smiling. "Heh. Welcome back, boy. This place hasn't been the same without you, truth be told."

"Yeah, I know. Cordelia came to visit me often enough in LA that I know what's happened ever since January," Xander said, a troubled look on his face. "Angel losing his soul and Buffy disappearing out of Sunnydale back in May, I mean. Only trouble is, no one knows where she went. So, what can you tell me?"

Unenthusiastically, Giles began to speak. Xander could tell he was omitting a lot from the story, but what little he did say did little to endear him to Xander's heart.

In the end, Harris said, "So lemme see if I can summarize: Angel lost his soul, and terrorized Sunnydale for four months because Buffy simply couldn't dust the guy like he was any other vampire. Then Dead Boy found this stone demon of some sort, and almost caused the end of the world after torturing and somehow tricking you into telling him what he wanted to know. Buffy then managed to kill Angel and carry you out of that mansion, dumping you at the hospital before taking off. That about cover it?"

"Well, yes. I suppose so-" Giles started to say.

"Okay, then I have some questions. Like why didn't you request some help from the Council to kill Angel as soon as he went bad, instead of depending on a traumatized 17-year-old girl to do it? And don't try to tell me that there was no rear-echelon support you could have called upon, I'm willing to bet the Watchers are lot like the OSI – the Slayer isn't the only weapon in their arsenal. It can't be," Xander said emotionlessly. "The world would have ended up in Hell centuries ago, because all it takes is just one demon having itself a really good day – and the Chosen One can't be everywhere at the same time."

"Well, I..." Giles floundered, as he didn't want to admit the truth. Namely, that he'd been afraid the Council wet works team would have killed Buffy as well as Angelus for unleashing that soulless vampire in the first place.

"And another thing: what about Willow? I know Ms. Calendar had started to teach her how to do magic, but Willow kept going on her own with that after Ms. C was killed. That's why she insisted on doing that soul curse, even though the Willster was fresh out of a coma and the odds were that it should have failed.

"In fact, from what Cordy says, Willow DID fail, but she was possessed by something or someone that channelled the mojo through her. So my question is, what possessed her that day, Giles? Did you ever even try to find out?" Xander asked in that way-too-calm voice.

"Well, no," the Watcher had to admit. "I, I've been busy looking for Buffy-"

"Who's developed quite the reputation around here," Xander interrupted. "Not that she didn't have a reputation when I was still a student in this school, but murder charges are something else. No, wait, I guess they're not – she WAS about to be charged with murder before that robot Ted revealed his true colours, right? Kinda makes me wonder what would have happened if Ted hadn't showed up again when he did, and exactly what you and the Council would have done about it."

"Is there a point to all this, Xander?" Giles asked somewhat irritably as he started polishing his glasses.

But Rupert was astounded when Xander abruptly grabbed his glasses and crushed them with his bionic hand, not even wincing when the jagged edges bit into his palm.

"Yes, there's a point! My point is, there have been a lot of mistakes around here, ever since I got my ass benched from the Slayage! My girls have been in trouble, and I couldn't do a damn thing to help them. But that's all gonna change now, I promise you.

"I'm not sure how yet, exactly," he noted, "but there won't be any more of the crap that happened around here during junior year, that much I can guarantee."

Xander whirled around and left the library, leaving behind an astounded and a rather nervous Watcher in his wake.

***

The sewers beneath Sunnydale, California

October 23rd, 1998

As Buffy battled a number of vampires who were planning to make a sacrifice of newborn babies to the demon named Lurconis, Giles and Joyce watched Xander race after one of the robed personnel who had made a hasty retreat down the tunnel.

"What does that guy think he's doing?!" Joyce demanded, before her daughter unleashed a makeshift flame-thrower at Lurconis. The middle-aged woman currently acting like a teenager then screamed in fear, pressing against her 'date' for tonight.

"Oh, Xan-man's gonna get up to something pretty damn violent, I'd reckon," 'Ripper' Giles answered with a sharklike grin, not knowing that in a few minutes Harris would return with an unconscious Mayor Richard Wilkins, whose plans for ascension were effectively ruined now.

***

Abandoned mansion on Crawford Street, Sunnydale, California

December 27th, 1998

"So you tried to commit suicide on Christmas Day, and it snowed in California for the first time EVER. Coincidence? I think not."

"I have to agree," Angel replied guardedly, and the least bit nervously. To his undead senses, Xander didn't really smell human anymore: there were too many artificial body parts throwing off his scent, thanks to Willow and Chris's handiwork a year ago. "Someone or something definitely wanted me to live-"

"You mean apart from Buffy? Yeah, no argument there. The question is, though, why? Why is it so important for you not to end up dust? According to Buffy, six months ago that Whistler person said that it was all to do with that big demon rock your evil alter ego almost destroyed the planet with. But that's all over with now, so what new apocalypse is coming our way?" Xander asked.

"I don't know," the vampire admitted.

"Do you think it could be Angelus again?" Xander asked challengingly. "Because I heard Willow gushing about how you and Buffy have finally gotten back together. Oddly, it's like she's completely forgotten what might happen if you end up having another happy and go completely psycho again."

"That's not gonna happen," Angel said immediately.

"Really? You can guarantee me that?" Harris said cuttingly. "I sure hope so, for your sake. Because just so you know, if you ever lose your soul again? I'll come after you at once with everything I've got, and I won't rest until you're dust. And if you think Buffy or anyone else could stop me, guess again – I almost broke Slay-gal's arm one time, when the Buffster tried to stop me from going after that asshole Trick 'for my own good'."

Xander headed towards the door, dropping a warning over his shoulder as he left. "Consider this the only warning you'll ever get from me. Stay miserable as hell in my town, or else suffer the consequences."

***

Outside the Bronze, Sunnydale, California

February 1st, 1999

"Hey, O'Toole? Been looking for you. And why am I thinking that that car isn't yours?"

The zombie known as Jack O'Toole looked up, and saw Xander Harris standing beside the vehicle he was about to boost to go to the graveyard and raise his buddies from the dead. "Beat it, Harris, before I slice open your face."

"Yeah? So how you gonna do that after I rip both your arms off, dead man walking? You think I didn't notice the lack of a pulse when you bumped into me inside the Bronze just now?"

O'Toole snarled, pulled out the knife he'd affectionately (and psychotically) named 'Katie' and exited the car; but the overconfident and sociopathic zombie never had a chance to avoid Xander's fist crashing straight through his face, and out the back of his skull.

***

Downtowner Apartments, Sunnydale, California

February 13th, 1999

"So it's like this. Buffy killed a man, and you saw it happen?"

"Yeah," the brunette Slayer named Faith said a little too defensively.

"And you waited until now to report it, why?" Xander continued his relentless questioning.

"What's it to you?" Faith demanded angrily.

"Buffy's my friend. The last time she was accused of murder, I wasn't here and I couldn't help her," Xander said with a frown. "According to her version of events, she threw that guy Finch to you in the middle of the fight with those vamps – and you staked him before you realized he was human."

"Yeah? Didn't realize B was that good at telling fairy tales," Faith sneered, even if on the inside she was starting to panic now.

"No one ever told you about my left eye, did they?" Xander asked, a hard look appearing on his face. "Because you see, Faith, I always know it when people are lying to me. There are a number of tells that the normal human eye can't pick up, but my artificial one can. Body heat, muscle twitches, that sort of thing. Basically, that's how I know that your pants are totally on fire right now."

Caught and feeling goaded beyond endurance, Faith lashed out with a Slayer punch: but Xander caught it in his right hand. The brunette Slayer fell screaming to her knees, as the bones in her hand were almost crushed by the inhuman amount of force being applied by her companion.

"Now, if I've finally gotten your attention, I'd say we need to talk some more about what actually happened that night..."

***

Outside No. 4 Parkview Crescent, Sunnydale, California

April 13th, 1999

"Well, I certainly wasn't expecting to ever see this."

Cordelia turned around with a sigh, dropping her suitcase onto the ground. "Xander, I'm really not in the mood. I just lost my home, my clothes, my car, everything. My dad's about to go to jail, my mom's hit the road, there's almost no money left for me to live on; so the Chase family is now officially a loser. We've hardly spoken to one another all year, so just spare me the gloat-fest on how Queen C finally got hers, okay?"

"What made you think I was here for that?" Xander asked curiously.

"Well, you know," Cordy said uncomfortably. "It's what we do, snipe at and insult one another."

"Then it's long past time we called a permanent ceasefire and admitted that we're not enemies anymore, don't you think?" Harris asked her straightforwardly. "You helped me when I needed it, Cordelia. So please, let me help you now when you need it."

"How? Can you just snap your fingers and make the IRS forget it ever investigated my dad's tax fraud?" she demanded harshly.

"No, but I can help you make a new start in life," Xander replied. "Because, see, the Cordelia Chase I know wouldn't just roll over and die because of a minor little setback like losing all her wealth. She'd take life by the balls and squeeze 'em until she got everything back that's rightfully owed to her. So, are you gonna come with me to my place and let me help you figure out how to get back to the top where you belong, or are you just gonna stand there and feel sorry for yourself?"

Cordelia's eyes blazed, as she finally started feeling alive again and threw her suitcase into the back seat of Xander's beat-up used car. "Fine! I'll show you..."

***

Just outside the Sunnydale town limits, California

July 10th, 1999

The bus roared off heading south towards Los Angeles, after a very boring high school graduation ceremony the previous month.

Cordelia was aboard, on her way to her new life far away from the Hellmouth. Right now Faith was with a Council shrink, Buffy was with Angel, Willow was with her boyfriend Oz, and Giles was with Buffy's mother Joyce – thanks to a very interesting episode regarding the high school band candy last year, and Xander telling the Englishman that life was too short not to grab every opportunity that came your way.

Xander himself gunned his car, heading the opposite way to the bus. He was headed for northern California, a road trip to the dense forests of the San Angelo Mountains.

He wanted to see the place where the Sasquatch was reputed to live, believe it or not.

Who knew, maybe he would get lucky and meet up with his Halloween friend, and hang out with a different sort of crowd for a while before finally heading off to see the sights of LA.

***

Next: Story 10 - Is There A Doctor In The House?