oooooooo Here's the new chapter. Let me know what you think.

"This place is beautiful," Buffy commented, as she walked down the streets of Galway with

Angel.

"I know it's been a really long time, but do you recognize any of these places, or are they all

new?" Buffy asked.

"There are some places that are older than me. But there's more new than old," he told her,

looking at her in a way she wasn't quite used to. He looked like he was nervous, maybe even upset.

They walked for a few more minutes without speaking, when suddenly Angel stopped walking.

"What's wrong?" Buffy asked him.

Angel was silent. He just looked around for a minute.

"This is where Darla turned you, isn't it?" Buffy said, figuring out what was going on.

"It is... It's weird that I still remember exactly where it happened."

"I don't think it's weird," Buffy said quietly. "I'll never forget where I was changed or how,

or the face of the vamp that did it... I get how you can still remember. I really do," she said,

looking at the ground... I think I wanna go back to the cabin now, if you don't mind. I'm

kind of tired," she said, wanting to get away from him at the moment. She was getting emotional again

and she didn't like the way he was looking at her.

"No problem. We'll just go to the butcher's first. You need to drink. What we have at the cabin isn't enough."

"You still have those two jars at the cabin. We don't need anymore. I'm fine. I don't need anything.

I'm not gonna drink, and that's that," Buffy said, bursting out.

"Talk to me Buffy. Say what's on your mind. You can deny it, but I know that you're scared."

"I'm not scared of anything," she challenged, starting to walk away.

"You're going the wrong way."

"I'm going back to the cabin."

"We need to go to the butcher's first," Angel told her again.

"I'm not hungry," she said stubbornly.

"Buffy-"

"If you want to, you can go there, bring something back if you want, I don't care. I'm going

back to your place," Buffy said, running off.

Angel was worried about her. He wanted to go after her, but he knew she needed to drink.

He rushed off to the butcher shop and hurried back to the cabin.

He walked in and closed the door behind him. "What do you need me to do Buffy? What can

I do to make this better?" he asked, before even looking at her.

"Help me make this go away," she said.

Angel looked up. Buffy held a hot-poker from the fireplace to her neck.

"What the hell are you doing?" Angel yelled, grabbing the poker away from her, and

throwing it to the floor. "Are you trying to kill yourself?"

"At this point, dying doesn't seem like such a bad thing." Buffy said, without emotion.

Her neck was smoking.

"You're stronger than this, Buffy. And strong is fighting. You're going to have to fight

everyday to stay strong. You told me that once. Don't just give up now. I know this is hell for you,

trust me, I know how bad this is. But it happened, and now we have to deal. Let me help you."

"I could feel his damn mark there, the scar he gave me. The skin is all bumpy. It feels huge.

He marked me dammit, like I'm his. I want it gone," she said, voice quivering. "Can you still

see it?"

"Buffy-"

"Can you still see it?" she yelled.

"All I can see is a burn mark," he told her. "If you're in a dying mood and are trying to get

rid of all your scars, I think you have one on the other side of your neck, one from me. You

should get rid of that one too, before you kill yourself," he said, getting angry.

"Angel-" Buffy started.

"No-"

"I'm not trying to kill myself... And I'm not trying to burn your mark off me... That has

never bothered me, Angel. I let you drink. I made you drink from me. I put myself in your

hands because I loved you, and because I trusted you. I didn't love the son of a bitch who

turned me, and I sure as hell didn't trust him... He took what was mine and changed me. I

was the Slayer. Now I'm a vamp. That's so messed up... My life has always been crazy, but

this, I don't know what to do... How can I not be the Slayer? Even saying that, how can I be

the Slayer, now? I got beat, Angel. I got beat in the worst way a Slayer could be beat. I was

made into what I pretty much kill for a living... And you know what? Yeah, I admit it. I'm

scared now, and I was scared out of my mind when he bit me. I knew I couldn't win that

fight. There were so many of them. I knew that either I was gonna die, or turn out like

this... I was scared," she said, quietly.

Angel pulled her to him, and hugged her. She felt the tears coming on. She didn't want him

to see her cry right now, and tried to move away from him.

"I'm not letting go," he told her. "And don't bother trying not to cry. This is me and you. No

hiding. It's okay. Let it out," he said, stroking her hair.

And so she did. She cried against his chest for almost five minutes before speaking again.

"I got your shirt all wet," she said.

"No biggie," he said, smiling at her.

"You know, when he bit me, I remember thinking, 'If he's gonna kill me, that's okay, just let

me die. Hurry up, get it over with'. Then I thought, 'Oh my God. I'm gonna be turned... If it

has to happen, let it be Angel. Angel would never make it hurt this much. Angel wouldn't

leave me lying here. Angel won't let me hurt anyone'... Please don't say anything. That wasn't said to

get a response. I just wanted you to know what was going on in my head.You told me to talk, I'm talking."

"Okay," Angel answered. He really didn't know what to say, looking at her sadly.

Buffy moved away from him slowly. "Tomorrow morning, I'm gonna start to get everything

together. No more moping and complaining. Tomorrow is the day for figuring things out."

"Before you say goodnight, or good morning, just drink what I brought you, okay? Believe

me, I know it feels weird, but you need blood now. You need it to stay strong," he told her

gently.

"I can't... I know that's not human blood, but I can't drink blood from a freakin' cup, like it's coffee.

No offence... I don't know how to explain it. I know what I am now, but that doesn't make the thought of

drinking blood any less terrifying, even if it isn't human. And the cup, I just can't explain it. It's just so

not normal... For you it is, you've been like this for ages, you've adjusted, I haven't."

"Buffy, I'm not kidding. You have to drink. I need you to drink. You can't go much longer without

blood, so please do me a favour, and just try to drink the stuff."

"Angel-" Buffy started.

"Okay, simple solution. No human blood, and you don't even have to have the animal blood for now. But you have to promise to drink what I offer you. Promise?"

"Okay. Promise," Buffy said, unsure. "But what is it? You said, not human blood or animal blood. What can I drink that's not blood?"

"I didn't say it wasn't blood. I just said it wasn't animal or human. Now drink, from me," Angel said. "Take your pick, wrist or neck."

"No Angel," she said, exasperated.

"You promised. You don't break promises. Just drink, please. You're gonna drive me insane. Just do it for me.

You're not gonna take care of yourself, then I will ... It doesn't hurt me, okay. Just drink," he told her.

She was gonna object, but then she shut her mouth. She was inconveniencing Angel enough as it was.

He felt horrible, and she didn't want to make him have more to worry about... And, she didn't want to

admit it, but she really was hungry. She was trying to fight it, but she needed something. And Angel's blood was something...

She remembered back to when she wasn't ensouled, when she drank from him. His blood tasted wonderful.

It was disgustingly good. She began to think back in amazement, to when she had let Angel drink her. She didn't know how he could have stopped.

She could have kept drinking from him even after she had pulled away, and that was only vamp blood. They say human blood is irresistable.

'Gross. Gross. Stupid blood. Gross,' Buffy cursed in her head. She was going to drive both herself and Angel nuts at this rate. 'Yummy blood. Nasty blood.'

Damn, Angel was right, she really did need to drink... She wouldn't be hurting anyone, it wasn't even from an animal, which she knew she would eventually need to get used to.

"Okay," she said. She put her hands on his shoulders, and then sunk her fangs into his neck.

It was a sweet escape for Buffy, the pain was vanishing, her head began to clear.

The hunger took over, and she drank. She was so hungry, that she had pushed Angel down onto the sofa.

Standing up was wasting a portion of the energy she needed to feed. She was practically sitting on him now, drinking.

'This is so good,' she thought.

As soon as that thought ran through her mind, something went off inside her. It wasn't right to think like that.

Slayers did not think like that.

She tore herself away from him so quickly, walking to the corner of the room that was farthest from Angel.

"I didn't want to stop," was all she said.

"It's only me. It doesn't matter. Take what you need," he said.

"I'm a monster," she said quietly.

"You're not... You're just different now."

"...Thanks for the uh... meal," she said awkwardly.

Angel tried to smile.

After a few minutes of silence, Buffy spoke.

"Can you pass me a pillow and blanket, please?" Buffy asked.

"Why?" he asked her.

"Because I kind of want to go to sleep. Maybe in the morning, I'll wake up and this will just be some nightmare" she answered.

"There's already blankets and a pillows on the bed. As for the nightmare, it's not going anywhere. I won't lie to you," he told her.

"I'm not taking your bed Angel."

"Yeah, like I'm actually gonna let you sleep on the couch. Just take my bed. I like the couch. It's very comfortable."

"Oh stop being a guy. Woman with power here," she said pointing at herself. "The couch

won't hurt me. Plus, you just said it was comfy," Buffy retorted stubbornly.

Angel just laughed. "I'm well aware that you are a woman with power. But you do not take

the couch," Angel said, lying down on the couch, claiming it as his.

"You're still as stubborn as ever," Buffy commented, laughing a bit. "Whatever, you win. I'm

too tired to battle for the couch... Where did you put my bag?" she asked.

"What bag?" Angel asked her.

"Oh come on, I didn't have a bag, when you found me?"

"No," Angel answered.

"Stupid jackasses. They even stole my damn clothes. I had weapons, clothes, and my

phone in that damn bag," Buffy cursed.

"I can give you something of mine to sleep in for now," Angel offered.

"Thanks," Buffy said.

Angel got up and went into his room.

Buffy closed her eyes and sent a message to Willow, asking her to bring her some clothes

tomorrow.

Angel came back with one of his shirts. He was a lot bigger than Buffy so his shirt would fit more

like a nightgown.

"Here you go," Angel said, passing the shirt to Buffy.

"Thank you," she said, taking the shirt, heading to the washroom to change.

Angel smiled when she came out of the bathroom. She looked adorable in his shirt.

"What?" she asked, getting into the bed.

"Nothing," he said, shaking his head. He was remembering them, how they used to be. He

remembered lying with her, and a lot more than that. "Goodnight," he said.

"Angel," Buffy said quietly.

"I'm sorry for being such a headache, and a bitch."

"You're not a headache. It's my job to help you with this. This is crazy for you. You can get away with being a bit bitchy."

"Would you just stay with me tonight? Lie with me?" she blurted out.

She didn't know what he was feeling, but she knew that he still cared, even if it was out of a feeling of obligation. Right now, at this

very moment she didn't care what he felt, as long as he cared, because she was scaring herself. She needed to feel something real beside her,

to help her deal with the reality that was her new life. Something real, and something she knew. Angel was both.

Angel got off the couch, and got into the bed.

"I'm allowed to be a wuss, once in awhile, right?" Buffy laughed.

"You're not a wuss," Angel told her. "You just want something familiar in the midst of all this

craziness. Come here," he said.

Buffy moved closer to him and rested her head on his chest. "Thanks," she said.

"Oh yes, because lying here with you is such hard work," he joked.

Buffy laughed. "You know what I mean."

"No worries," he told her. "Just sleep now. The sun's almost up."

"Night, Angel."

"Goodnight," he said, planting a kiss on her forehead.